How to Sop Self-desctruct Mode?

I think we've all been there and maybe it takes a pyschologist to figure it out. ) My GUESS is that when we sabotage our own efforts it is because something makes us fearful aobut actually achieving success. I think the answer is wihtin you but you have to do some spoul searching. For example, have you used your weight as an excuse NOT to do something...ie. find a mate/change jobs/confront someone who has hurt you in some way? Good luck figuring it out - I think it's key in stopping the destructive behaviour.

Oh my God, I am having the same problem. I have read books on addiction to self destruction and sometimes it comes from things in our childhood and also we have a fear of failure and success. If we try something new and fail, it tells us that we cant do anything, if we succeed, its hard because we get comfortable with who we are even if we are not happy, but now we have to get comfortable with being different. Also, we have the fear that what if we cant maintain it once we achieve it and then people will start notice and talk and then it goes back to us failing at somethig. Its has nothing to do with the weight, its why we are eating in the first place. I dont know if this helped, but I am happy to know I am not alone.

Also, when you have a set back, tell your self, if you are blessed with another day, tomorrow will be different and leave the past in the past and do better the next day.

I know exactly how you feel. I seem to do the self-desctuct mode at least once a week. I have a great two or three days and then it's all over for a day and then I just don't eat enough for the rest of the week.. Which is just as bad, I've been using this sight for 10 weeks now and I've only lost 12 pounds. I loose a pound, then gain a pound. (Thats been the last 4 weeks). I really should exercise more but really I hate it. (I work at a gym-which I have no reason not to go, its free) Although when working I don't get to work out. So I have to come back and thats just not happening. Okay I'm done complaining. Thanks

A timely question, as I have found myself doing similar things.

It has been suggested to me that perhaps it is a way to continue the cycle of 'needing to be better' without ever finding out what comes after achieving that percieved goal. (Fear of change/the unknown.)

Sometimes we slip, human nature, and personal choice make that an option. The important question is, what happens next? Do we follow the spiral into a self-destructive pattern? Or take a deep breath, choose to keep less of those tempting foods close at hand, and strengthen our resolve to find out 'what IS next?' and get past that first little bout of self-sabatoge.

Breathe deeply, be well, and be kind to yourself.

I have also had that issue. I will be going strong and weigh in, lose several pounds and you'd think that would be motivation to keep going, but instead I find that is invariably the day I feel a need to eat everything in the house. My solution is not to weigh in every week. I try and weigh in every 2 weeks. I tell myself I can do anything for 2 weeks, so I get a longer period of time before I have this crazy moment of needing to eat things I don't really want. This has not solved the problem, but it has helped the binge eating. Many people here say they have a "cheat" meal or day, so I don't plan these days but they happen. I have found the most important thing is to just leave it behind and start again the next day. In the long run, you'll still lose weight. Maybe a little slower than you would without those days, but then there are those who say when you change it up you keep your body wondering and avoid the dreaded starvation mode.

I read a book...Women, Food and God, that focuses on why we do this to ourselves and how to love and be kind to ourselves. It has taught me a lot and helped those feelings of negativity. It may give you some insight in to why you do the things you do. Best of luck!

WOW, it is nice to know that A LOT of people are having the same issue, not that is a good thing, but at least I don't feel like I am the only one!! Keep it up guys, we CAN do this!!

I agree with everything people have said -- and I have also done this (many times!). In addition to what has already been said, I'd like to add one very basic thought: HUNGER. I find if I've eaten too few calories for several days, or really exercised a lot leaving a low number of net calories, I end up totally binging. I may not even FEEL hungry, but that's the pattern. So if you are defining having a "good" day as "not eating many calories", you might want to rethink the definition of "GOOD"! Eat your calories! I really have found that eating MORE (but staying within my goal range of course) actually helps me to "go crazy" less! Good luck!

So you did all that work to get down to 150 and you're still not happy? Perhaps you should seek what it is you're truly looking for at the bottom of that bottle.

I know I'm looking for my imaginary BF at the bottom, but he's never there, just my good friend Mr. Hangover.

I think something that happens is that we see results and think of how hard we worked to get those results and maybe think I will have to work this hard my whole life to maintain this...and that sucks a bit so I am going to splurge on myself etc so that I don't feel like I am constantly "working" on this thing. (please pardon the complete lack of punctuation)

I wonder if a binging from time to time could be offset with scheduled treats...ie...instead of binging over the top have a dessert every Sunday...pick something that feels indulgent but you can manage into your plans etc. Also, while it does seem you have had an off day I think a day from time to time that you just don't count it all can be good.
Start fresh today and things will be fine.

You are doing an awesome job Archyjill - don't be so hard on yourself when you screw up one day !!!!! You are still fit as a fiddle - have you looked into calorie shifting....maybe that might work for you... check it out
http://losefat-online.com/calshift.htm