Defeated and Depressed

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Replies

  • littlems
    littlems Posts: 28
    first hugs to you, second - look at all these posts of incourgment for you! it is depressing at times when the scale doesnt move and you dont feel good in your own skin. i have struggled with my weight ever since having my kids. i have about 30-40 to take off. i would suggest talking to your dr then i would suggest joining a class or a gym or something to get extra friends for support. i joined karate almost 5 years ago. yes i am still overweight but i found some great friends who keep pushing me along and i push them.
  • Beebee78
    Beebee78 Posts: 703
    Right Mrs...firstly hugs because nobody should feel like this.

    Secondly - erm you 'used to be pretty' but where did the thin girl go? Thin DOES NOT equal pretty. You are STILL pretty you just fail to see that right now.

    Thirdly as my lovely trainer tells me there is no such word as CANT apparently the word we are looking for is wont. Replace can't with wont and you'll soon motivate yourself to do this.

    Here on MFP you will find SO much support it is unreal and in a few months time you will look back at your introductory post and think wow - was that me?

    Lastly - just some more hugs xxx
  • doris_day
    doris_day Posts: 159
    I have NEVER EVER written or told anyone what I wrote. I can't believe I put myself out here. It only took about 15 minutes to stop crying after I read all your wonderful replies and encouraging words.

    I never thought I "needed" any support - I could do this on my own. I now understand the benefit of MFP. We are collectively all in this together. There is accountability with each other.

    Thank you so much - this is just incredible.

    I didn't sleep very well last night thinking about starting my NEW day - my new day to being the girl I want to be.
  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
    Welcome, Doris!!!

    Like others have posted before me, you are not alone in your struggles! I struggle daily with the urge to snack and am still figuring out strategies to outwit myself!

    Have you had a full check-up lately to eliminate the possibility that it might be something going on with your body that's causing this? Thyroid, depression, adhd etc can all affect your hunger or your urge to snack.

    Please feel free to send me a friend request, we can battle this together!
  • willimh
    willimh Posts: 227 Member
    Good Morning, how do you request friends or see if someone requested you? I'm also new at MFP. I think I started at the end of Aug and I am still trying to make the adjustments.
  • dj_stevie_c
    dj_stevie_c Posts: 270
    Welcome!

    This weight loss thing is hard but it's mostly mental.

    If you say "I can't" then you are already giving up before you've started, I'm not telling you off, because there is only one person who should be telling you anything and that's yourself, if you are not ready to heal then you won't get far. You have to be strong and positive. Even if you have a bad day, the next day will be better.

    That said there's nothing like a bit of support, someone to help or commiserate where you're going wrong, or celebrate when things go right.

    MFP is a great place if you use it for the right things. Get yourself a ticker and join in on the forums :) And good luck!
  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
    Good Morning, how do you request friends or see if someone requested you? I'm also new at MFP. I think I started at the end of Aug and I am still trying to make the adjustments.

    Hi! If you click on someone's photo it will take you to their profile. From there, there's a green button to 'add as friend'. Then you just type an optional message and click to send your friend request.

    If you have a friend request, MFP will email you. You can also see it from your 'My Home' page, and also on your friends page (access from 'my home' page). HTH
  • Dremelius
    Dremelius Posts: 23
    Hello,

    First, stop bashing yourself so much. You are STILL a pretty lady! What is it about yourself that you like? Your eyes? legs? smile? Enhance them, play them up. While I certainly understand that you may not want to invest in some clothes, stop looking like a hobo. I have found that if one tries to look nice on the outside, it helps them feel better on the inside. Second, you apparently understand the risks associated with being overweight and it sounds like you have a great support system in your husband, so that's a positive. Third, maybe you need to try and identify what are trigger foods for you and try to eliminate them or limit them. Also, when are you apt to eat more? Identify that and try to have a plan in place. For example, have some healthy snacks/fruits on hand when the urge to eat creeps up. (When my kids were young, I would eat at night after they were in bed. That's when everything seemed calmer.) Also, it seems as if exercise is or has been a part of your life, and that's a great stride in fighting the battle. Take it a day at a time and be patient with yourself. You will find some great support here. Good luck!
  • 2BaNewMe2
    2BaNewMe2 Posts: 102 Member
    Your story sounds so much like mine and alot of others. Its frustrating to work at losing and not see much success. Three years ago I joined some girls at work on "A lifestyle change". I lost 50 lbs. doing an adjusted version of the "Southbeach Diet". Both of the girls then transferred to other locations. I then gained back the 50 lbs and then some, but I still kept to some of the changes started.

    The few things that help me even now are giving up sugar (unless natural), I was surprised at how well "sugar free" things taste now. I can hardly tell the difference. All pastas, rice, breads are whole grain (make sure first ingredient does not say enriched).

    Since starting MFP 2 weeks ago and logging all of my calories and exercise, I have noticed a huge difference in my eating habits. I had the opportunity to have resteraunt tacos and breaded chicken sandwiches last night and turned them down for a Fiber One bar until I got home for dinner (at hospital with family members). I am learning how to push my plate away when I am feeling satisfied, instead of eating until full or all is gone. I first check calories on anything before I eat it, then make sure I can afford the extras on my daily food log. I joined a gym to help work off some of the calories also.

    My point is, this is not going to be a fast or easy goal for any person to take on, but it is something that CAN be done. Hang in there and don't be so down on yourself. We are all here for you!!!
  • dkray1
    dkray1 Posts: 1
    I know what you mean about feeling defeated. I recently had some acupressure done and that really has helped. I have reduced a lot of my cravings especially the ones for sugar. Another suggestion is to have you thyroid checked, after having kids it isn't uncommon for women's thyroids to slow down.
  • MMarcordes
    MMarcordes Posts: 58 Member
    Don't be so hard on yourself! You sound like you have the same problem as the rest of us on here. I'm blessed to have lost nearly 60 pounds - and still - I think about food every second of the day. What's my next snack? Is it time to eat, yet? When's dinner? What's for dinner? Is it time to eat, yet? The only advice I can offer - plan ahead. I only bring to work what I am going to eat that day. I don't keep snacks at my desk because I'd eat them all in one day. I don't buy snacks for home (unless I can count exactly how many calories there are). Potato chips are my downfall. But, I've figured out that if I bring a single portion of Pringles for lunch - that's good enough for me. The only other thing is take it one meal at a time. You can do it. You have three good meals in a row - and that's a whole day. You'll find that you actually survived and it makes a tiny bit easier the next day. Use the tools on here - they are very helpful. Good luck!!!!!
  • championnfl
    championnfl Posts: 324 Member
    Sounds to me that you need help....:bigsmile: We both went to a nutricnist to help us with meal planning. More info on what a carb,protein, & fat is. Its hard to reach your goal if not having the tools and knowledge to get there.
    2nd stop being so hard on yourself,start thinking positive, we always say goal achieving is 90% mental and 10% action!
    Surround yourself with loving,caring,& supportive people.[Sounds like you need alot of encouragement].:wink: YOU CAN DO THIS! Read message boards daily,you have alot of company.
    Finally, "make a plan & work your plan"----" Its a journey not a sprint"--- Took time to get this way,will take awhile to lose it----"believe to achieve"---- Fall off the wagon get right back on the next day!

    Everyone at MFP believes you can, DO YOU???????:drinker: :happy:
    P.S. Took me 4 years to get 60lbs over weight,but will lose it[starts above the shoulders]
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