Jilted Girlfriend! Im so going to lose weight.

NithyaBaabu
NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
in Introduce Yourself
hello everyone,
im a 20 year old girl and ive been over weight for almost 12 years but it just didnt matter untill my boyfriend of four years dumped me becaue of my weight and stretch marks. it was the biggest wake up call ever. about time too.
ive cried for days but the crying stops now. i want to focus all this negative energy into losing weight. the next time he sees me im so going to make his jaw drop. NO, i DO NOT want him back. i would never want to have to do anything with a guy that shallow. i just want to show him what hes missing. I just want him to realise "Im gone and im not coming back."
And right now i just need some friends to motivate and support me. im kind of an introvert and love to spend my time drawing or writing or reading, which means i go out rarely and do not have too many friends. Sometime my eating patterns can be erratic and if you have any problems with it, please do not send me a friend request or judge unnecesarily. This is a sudden change for me and id like to take it at my own pace and style. And others who can relate and will support me with no judgement, please do send me a FR or just leave a comment, I will add you :) i promise to be a good source of support and encouragement in return for yours :)
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Replies

  • FloridaxAmanda
    FloridaxAmanda Posts: 3
    What a jerk! Just a little tip: Make sure you are doing this for you and the right reasons! It will make the transition a hell of a lot easier! Feel free to add for motivation and support :)
  • Dipayan123
    Dipayan123 Posts: 20
    hello everyone,
    im a 20 year old girl and ive been over weight for almost 12 years but it just didnt matter untill my boyfriend of four years dumped me becaue of my weight and stretch marks. it was the biggest wake up call ever. about time too.
    ive cried for days but the crying stops now. i want to focus all this negative energy into losing weight. the next time he sees me im so going to make his jaw drop. NO, i DO NOT want him back. i would never want to have to do anything with a guy that shallow. i just want to show him what hes missing. I just want him to realise "Im gone and im not coming back."
    And right now i just need some friends to motivate and support me. im kind of an introvert and love to spend my time drawing or writing or reading, which means i go out rarely and do not have too many friends. Sometime my eating patterns can be erratic and if you have any problems with it, please do not send me a friend request or judge unnecesarily. This is a sudden change for me and id like to take it at my own pace and style. And others who can relate and will support me with no judgement, please do send me a FR or just leave a comment, I will add you :) i promise to be a good source of support and encouragement in return for yours :)

    Hello Dear

    He didnot deserve you . But you deserve happiness so lose weight if it makes you happy.

    Take care.
  • dramagirl1
    dramagirl1 Posts: 27
    A total jerk! Just know that if you aren't doing it for you it won't stick. That being said, congrats on your new journey! You're going to feel so much better! Feel free to add me as a friend, I log in everyday, have a public diary, and like to give/receive encouragement. Lets do this together!
  • vlland
    vlland Posts: 55 Member
    You go girl !!! I was married for 14 yrs to a man that didn't like my weight. btw at the time of our divorce I was only 10lbs more than when he chose to marry me and that was after a baby. Anyway, I eventually lost weight and it was sweet revenge. I did it for me but seeing him at my lower weight was sweet icing on the cake. U deserve better and will get better i'm sure. ur young and have plenty of time to find the right man - a man that loves u unconditionally. Good luck :)
  • kordell70
    kordell70 Posts: 49 Member
    Good Luck to you in your quest Nithya. However, as was stated earlier your quest for personal health should be about you and not him. Many times weight loss is about mental growth as well as physical. If you are doing it to make your ex realize he is missing something then you will most likely get hurt. I mean what happens if you lose the weight, bump into him and he could care less that you have lost weight because he has moved on with his life in a healthy and mature manner. I wish you the best of luck, just make sure you are doing it for you and I am sure you will get lots of support from this community.
  • Cole082380
    Cole082380 Posts: 4
    Sounds like he was taking his own insecurities out on you,sorry you had to go through that... I do agree with some other posts,make sure you do this for yourself and not just to show him... though whatever motivates you to try and be healthy will ultimately be rewarding in the end :-) feel free to add me... we're all in this together.Nothing wrong with making our outer beauty match our inner beauty :-)
  • sparks787
    sparks787 Posts: 16 Member
    Hi. Again, lose the weight for you. It sounds like you always had a downer on yourself and you blamed it on being overweight. Your ex knew that, he knew how to put you down. Lose the weight for your health for your happiness, for yourself. Love yourself now, you deserve love, fat or thin remember that the essential you is a beautiful person. good luck, and keep in touch, feel free to add me as a friend
  • AerinRae
    AerinRae Posts: 3
    Looking good and feeling good will be the cherry on the sundae! Usually, positive changes in lifestyle are full circle. The confidence will improve more than just your relationships. Be selfish, think about yourself, not that idiot. Good luck!
  • timothydriver
    timothydriver Posts: 147 Member
    Wow what a story! I am glad your motivated to loose weight that's great! I hope for the best in your upcoming future. Stay with it and keep movtivated...Feel free to add me
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    He didn't break up with you because of your weight. He just made it sound like that because he's a douche. Do what you gotta do but hold out for a guy that wants you for you no matter what you look like. Welcome to MFP.
  • KalieHudson
    KalieHudson Posts: 307 Member
    Sorry about your boyfriend he's a jerk. You came the right place to make that change! I sent you a friend request. I love to support fellow MFP friends. Anyone feel free to add!
  • Shellbell2807
    Shellbell2807 Posts: 8
    Wow what a jerk! It's already been said but this journey is all about you girl! Clearly he did NOT deserve you.
    No matter what happens from now on it is super important you love yourself and realise just how special you really are. Feel free to add me :) always up for a chat and to offer support and motivation. Good luck beautiful xx
  • agracebee
    agracebee Posts: 5
    I'd love to add you :) I haven't had to deal with a jerk like you have, but being overweight before age 20 and having stretch marks is something I've been though and worse. I'm 26 now and wish I'd started earlier like you are now!
  • louisegibbs85
    louisegibbs85 Posts: 304 Member
    Wow what a mongrel he is .... any who feel free to add, I am like you to into my drawing and that, good luck on your journey
  • enchantedgardener
    enchantedgardener Posts: 214 Member
    I've dated my fair share of inconsiderate jerks. I know how painful it can be to realize you've been wasting your time on someone who clearly didn't deserve your love!

    Now you're ready to embark on a new journey. How wonderful indeed! Taking good care of yourself is the absolute best thing you can do to get over a painful or difficult experience. Congratulations on making the decision to put yourself and your health first, which is as it should be! Wishing you all the best in reaching your health and fitness goals. :)

    Post scriptum: the fact that you used the word 'jilted' makes the word nerd in me supremely happy.
  • TamaraKat
    TamaraKat Posts: 533 Member
    You know what; you can so totally complete this journey just do it for the right reasons! Just make sure you work hard and put in effort and dedication. I am sure you will find many amazing people on this site as I have. It will get tough at times but you can do this.
    Feel free to add me; I am very active and try to help motivate and support where needed as well as up for random chats! :drinker:
  • dga226
    dga226 Posts: 224 Member
    well seems like a big jerk to me I go by whats on the inside thats how i meet my wife. funny thing is she was right under my nose the whole time/ We went to the same church since i was 10 and she was about 4 lol
  • VoicelessRide
    VoicelessRide Posts: 395 Member
    What a jerk! Just a little tip: Make sure you are doing this for you and the right reasons! It will make the transition a hell of a lot easier! Feel free to add for motivation and support :)

    I agree totally
  • leadcrow
    leadcrow Posts: 9 Member
    What a jerk! Just a little tip: Make sure you are doing this for you and the right reasons! It will make the transition a hell of a lot easier! Feel free to add for motivation and support :)

    I am not going to say 'oh I am so sorry for you' etc, you are a strong powerful woman and that guy is clearly a self centred, vain and shallow ****hole. You are brilliant and can achieve anything you want to. Lose all that weight AND DO IT FOR YOURSELF then have you seen that, episode of Friends when Monica is a teen and Chandler calls her fat so in a year she loses all that weight an pd rubs it in his face? Well. I hope you get the chance to do that.

    Again, lose the weight for you and no one else.

    Also, I don't mean to sound like I'm rubbing it in, but I was thin, got super, super big very fast, stayed big for 4 years then got back to a healthy weight. All that time my boyf, and now husband (who married me when I was still a big girl) stayed with me because he loved me for me, not my size. Never go out with anyone if you think they'd stop loving you for being big or small or whatever xxx
  • JoDonoghue79
    JoDonoghue79 Posts: 3
    Skinny girls get dumped too.
    Make sure you are changing because YOU want to, not because someone else made you think that you should.

    Welcome to MFP and good luck.

    P.S. Just make sure that when you are looking good, and your confidence has been restored, that you 'accidentally bump into' this ungentlemanly sod. And make sure he is aware that being dumped was the best thing that ever happened to you.
  • vlland
    vlland Posts: 55 Member
    I agree "skinny girls get dumped too" but.... When u r skinny (or whatever gives the confidence that u r the best u can be and a super great catch), then it doesn't sting as much. u can move forward easier knowing its his lost and not second guessing ur worth. I know for me personally- if I feel I gave the best of me and I am rejected- then the guy was an idiot for not recognizing my greatness and he just wasn't worth my time. everyone deserves love and respect no matter what number is on the scale but I think doing whatever it takes to improve urself/self-esteem the better u r able to ride lifes ups and downs. The new and improved u will attract a new and improved man - one that is worthy of u.
  • Irenaekl
    Irenaekl Posts: 116 Member
    As everyone else said - do this for you!

    Losing weight for someone else will NOT work. Do this to make you feel better about yourself since your confidence has been dealt a blow and you're feeling hurt and angry, certainly - but also do it to look forward to a better future. Also remember that there are decent guys out there who are not so shallow and who will love you for WHO you are and not just because you look a certain way.
  • modernshieldmaiden
    modernshieldmaiden Posts: 18 Member
    What a **** and a half - want me to crush his balls under my steel-toed boots for ya?

    In seriousness, we all have something that slaps us in the face that makes us change ourselves, and if that's what it was for you, definitely no judging going on here. There is a certain happiness that comes only from sticking it to certain former relations.

    I'm going to add you, as you sound a lot like me - I'm introverted to an embarrassing degree and would rather read or rip through cookbooks than anything else. And your food intake sounds kind of like mine, too. xxx
  • ereck44
    ereck44 Posts: 1,170 Member
    I'm glad to support you. If getting jilted is a motivating tool to get you to start working out and losing weight, more power to you. I think that it might help you work on your self-confidence also.
    As far as your ex-, here's hoping that in a few years, he will be a faint memory and you won't even be able to remember his name.
  • NithyaBaabu
    NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
    I think im gonna take you up on your offer ;)
  • NithyaBaabu
    NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
    Skinny girls get dumped too.
    Make sure you are changing because YOU want to, not because someone else made you think that you should.

    Welcome to MFP and good luck.

    P.S. Just make sure that when you are looking good, and your confidence has been restored, that you 'accidentally bump into' this ungentlemanly sod. And make sure he is aware that being dumped was the best thing that ever happened to you.


    dayum, I love your P.S, Im so going to jot that down in my diary and make sure i "accidentally" bump it into him when im done with my mission :D
  • NithyaBaabu
    NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
    What a **** and a half - want me to crush his balls under my steel-toed boots for ya?

    In seriousness, we all have something that slaps us in the face that makes us change ourselves, and if that's what it was for you, definitely no judging going on here. There is a certain happiness that comes only from sticking it to certain former relations.

    I'm going to add you, as you sound a lot like me - I'm introverted to an embarrassing degree and would rather read or rip through cookbooks than anything else. And your food intake sounds kind of like mine, too. xxx


    I think ?Im gonna take you on your offer :)
  • NithyaBaabu
    NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
    Looking good and feeling good will be the cherry on the sundae! Usually, positive changes in lifestyle are full circle. The confidence will improve more than just your relationships. Be selfish, think about yourself, not that idiot. Good luck!

    Exactly! it will just be the cherry on top, the sundae itself will be my well-earned self confidence and a strong confident me :)
  • NithyaBaabu
    NithyaBaabu Posts: 15
    I've dated my fair share of inconsiderate jerks. I know how painful it can be to realize you've been wasting your time on someone who clearly didn't deserve your love!

    Now you're ready to embark on a new journey. How wonderful indeed! Taking good care of yourself is the absolute best thing you can do to get over a painful or difficult experience. Congratulations on making the decision to put yourself and your health first, which is as it should be! Wishing you all the best in reaching your health and fitness goals. :)

    Post scriptum: the fact that you used the word 'jilted' makes the word nerd in me supremely happy.

    Lol im a nerd too :D you probably know that by now :D
  • cadaverousbones
    cadaverousbones Posts: 421 Member
    Guys are stupid idiots! Make sure you do it for you, and not for anyone else, or you will lose motivation quickly! I sent you a friend request. Curious, how much weight do you have to lose?

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