Why do you think people give up after first success?

I haven't stopped logging but I did become resentful about going to the gym 4 times a week. I really hit it hard for almost a year, and worked toward burning at least 600 calories every time I was there. I think that I was over exercising. I would spend hours at the gym.

My weight loss stalled ( plateaued) and then I pushed harder at the gym--working at burning 800 calories or greater. I hated that place! I would sit on the toilet for 5 minutes (at the gym), talking myself into getting my workout in.

Last Saturday (one week ago) I broke my great toe, shoveling blacktop (and burning 500 + calories doing it.) A large piece that I had lifted crumbled and a piece fell on my toe. Once I learned that it was broken, I was mortified. Not only was I going to miss my workouts but also working at my job.

From all of this I learned that I needed to slow down, reassess how I was doing things. I only gained a couple of pounds during the week (probably water weight), and now I am losing again, albeit slowly, and I haven't been able to exercise at all this week, except a little stretching.

I can't wait to get back to the gym--I am going to cut back and maybe do some of my workouts at home. The plateau thing--not the end of the world. A stall is better than going back to square one. Just needed a break (literally and well as figuratively).

Maybe it is like "quitting cigarettes"--sometimes it takes a couple of times of trying before one commits to it and figures out how to get it right!

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest!

I wrote this post. It might explain a bit

Learned helplessness .......

It might not be lack of motivation

Let me tell you a story. A long time ago, a baby elephant was born in captivity. While he was very little, his handlers used a chain to tie his leg to the ground. The little elephant pulled and pulled trying to get free but it never worked. Now that the elephant is full grown, the same chain is keeping him in place even tho he could easily break it. This phenomenon is called learned helplessness.

Learned helplessness is the condition of a human or animal that has learned to behave helplessly, failing to respond even though there are opportunities for it to help itself by avoiding unpleasant circumstances or by gaining positive rewards. Learned Helplessness theory is the view that clinical depression and related mental illnesses may result from a perceived absence of control over the outcome of a situation.Organisms that have been ineffective and less sensitive in determining the consequences of their behavior are defined as having acquired Learned Helplessness.

All that is very interesting but why is it posted on a fitness board? Because how many time do we see a thread about someone not doing what they need to do in order to take control of their weight and health? So many of us tried and failed at this.....I am sure we all have a story about using this diet or that diet and failing, or succeeding and than gaining it all back. The worst is that when we fail, we feel it is our fault. Not the fact that the diet is so low in calories that you will binge, or making it so restrictive that you freak out at the idea of a family Sunday diner, or fearing whole group of food or nutrients.

So we fail, and we fail, and we fail....we end up fatter than ever believing that it is our fault. We tugged and tugged at this damn chain and some of us end up thinking that we can't win at this. Heck how many time do we see in the success story that " I was not even sure I could do it"

For some, sadly it is not even worth it to try. For the others, those who come here and log more than a month, I know that you doubt your ability to do lose the weight. To do the "right" thing, to exercise even tho you were always the last picked in gym class. It is very hard to be successful if you have no faith in your capacities.

Now you have those who are successful. Usually they will tell you to eat enough, to not sweat that nice birthday diner, not to be scared of that bowl of ice cream that you can fit in you calories allowance. That you do not have to run for hours to see results and they are giving you this advice for free........quite different from the "diet industry" no?

I know that it is so different and might be scary.......but my question to you is, will you pull on that chain? The chain of the diet industry, those who want to sell you books, or a program, or this cleanse, or that pre packaged food. .....those persons and companies like you helpless, otherwise how can they tell you what to do for a price. Tugging on that chain is taking everything you think is true and researching the other side of the story. You might confirmed what you were thinking.......or not. Take the power, believe that you do have that power.

I can only speak for myself, but I struggle with increased male attention. It makes me highly uncomfortable.. Usully around 150-160lbs I start to "freak out" a bit. .. and start to eat more.

I do realise that questions of the "why do people do the things they do" ilk are a bit like the chicken or egg dilemma. I suppose overall people do things just because that's what they do - there is no one reason that can be applied.

But I'd be interested in hearing your opinions on why people give up just as they start seeing weightloss results. I personally know quite a few people who have joined MFP and achieved that first milestone of 5 to 10lbs loss... then went right back to their old ways, eating the way they used to, snacking all day long, not logging and of course reversing all the good work they had done thus far.

I find this baffling because for me, when I lost my first 5lbs, I found it to be a fantastic motivator to lose more, because it was working for me. Two plateaus have been hard, I'm still on my second one and I can't seem to get below 60kg, but I know it can be done and I'm not going to give up!

Why do you think people stop when they've had their first success?

I said the same thing. I thought "why, when you're doing so well, would you go back to where you were before?"I lost 70 pounds! I was on fire. Then, one day, I stopped tracking. No real reason, just didn't because I thought I had learned enough. Then I stopped walking as much. Then it was a slippery slope... I gained 40 pounds back in three months. I'm starting over, but I have to remind myself that I'm human, just as everyone else is. I will get there, it just might take me a few more times of reminding myself that I am human.

Personally, I have sabotaged myself on more than one occasion. I think that I am afraid of the time it will take for me to get to my goal, and that it sometimes seems overwhelming when you look at the big picture. I have learned to break things into sections and accomplish them. with my weight loss I am looking at 6 week blocks of time and what I can accomplish in each 6 weeks. ch
I think also I have been comfortably numb so to speak. In this fat body, I don't have to live real life. I can sit on the side lines and just watch. I don't have to apply myself....I am done with the side lines...I am ready to live my life, but its scary to imagine.

I do realise that questions of the "why do people do the things they do" ilk are a bit like the chicken or egg dilemma. I suppose overall people do things just because that's what they do - there is no one reason that can be applied.

But I'd be interested in hearing your opinions on why people give up just as they start seeing weightloss results. I personally know quite a few people who have joined MFP and achieved that first milestone of 5 to 10lbs loss... then went right back to their old ways, eating the way they used to, snacking all day long, not logging and of course reversing all the good work they had done thus far.

I find this baffling because for me, when I lost my first 5lbs, I found it to be a fantastic motivator to lose more, because it was working for me. Two plateaus have been hard, I'm still on my second one and I can't seem to get below 60kg, but I know it can be done and I'm not going to give up!

Why do you think people stop when they've had their first success?

They don't view it as a permanent change
They get discouraged after a few weeks when it slows down
self sabotage "Oh I'm doing really well. I can have this cheat meal"
loss of motivation because you have to keep working on it hard for a long time..
they quit because they aren't getting approval from others.


there are probably a lot more.

I got to the exact point where I am like 6-7 years ago and yes, I think it was one of those "this is temporary" mindsets and then I got happy with my weight and slowly went back to my previous eating habits but also I picked up soda again, something I found extremely easy to give up (again). I think it's just "normal" for me to eat all the time, it's what I've always done and what I'll probably always do, I just need to stick it in my mind that I need to snack on healthy things and not go for cookies or chips or worse, pastries and donuts. The second part of my problem is that I thought weight loss would make me attractive, that ladies would hit on me and that it'd be easier to get in a relationship... let's just say that never ever happened so I also gave up because I thought the effort wasn't worth it for the lack of results. I guess you could say I had lost weight for the wrong reasons, as in, not for myself.

i get a couple of people who say to me to stop losing weight and part of me thinks should i stop, are they right? but then i kick myself up the butt and look at what my healthy weight should be and realise they don't know what they are talking about. i do think comments like that can make people go back to their own ways, also people say to me "are you on a diet"? i say NOT a diet it's a healthier lifestyle, i think the word "DIET" is evil, people think diet means stop eating any sugar or carbs and alot of people think they can't eat meat or cheese, i think that can cause people to give up because they are always hungry and as soon as they eat something "naughty" they fall of the wagon and indulge. i think fear of commitment and failure are alot of reasons to. But i think that most of them haven't found mfp and had great friends helping them through their journey, it is a long one and everyone needs motivation every now and then :bigsmile: