I need some friends who understand...
Replies
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HI, and good luck with your journey. I too have tried many different diets but have gained back the weight that I lost plus. I am an emotional eater, whether it is a good or a bad emotion. I went through a divorce 6 years ago and lost all of my self esteem. I have found that MFP has really given me the help I need.
I started on Jan. 26 of this year and am down 57lbs, I have also started to like myself more. Hopefully through this process I will learn to love myself and be able to continue on this path.
I feel like I am in control of myself and have not had to give up anything, I just stay within my calorie limit and walk/ride exercise bike.
Good Luck!0 -
You should try the Whole 30 diet! It works really well and if you really stick with it, it shows great results! So what it is, is a 30 day diet (but you can keep it going if you want), but the thing is it's pretty hard and you have to have lots of self control (which was a problem for me). So you basically cannot have any: starches, breads, milk products, sugar... You are basically on a meat, veggie, and fruit diet (but not too much fruit because they have tons of sugar some times!) It's hard, but in 1month I lost 15 pounds! You also have to be ready to cook all of the time.
http://whole9life.com/2013/08/the-whole30-program/0 -
If Slim Fast really worked...by now no one would be fat. Its been around a long time and it will not fix you.0
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I too married a super skinny guy. He is constantly worried about losing weight if he doesn't get enough calories each day, and to add insult to injury, when he overeats, he simply poops more!
Still, I love every inch of that 6'2", 155 lb man...
Have I mentioned that my current goal weight is to simply weigh less than him?
This is me and my guy!:laugh:0 -
My husband/friends/family are the same. I agree about the slimfast. Its full of sugar. Try AdvantEDGE shakes, you can get them at GNC or even Walmart and they are high protein low sugar and they taste pretty good. Welcome, we all understand0
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I totally know how you feel! My husband and I weigh almost exactly the same and he is 6 ft. and I am 5'4"I too married a super skinny guy. He is constantly worried about losing weight if he doesn't get enough calories each day, and to add insult to injury, when he overeats, he simply poops more!
Still, I love every inch of that 6'2", 155 lb man...
Have I mentioned that my current goal weight is to simply weigh less than him?
I just want to weigh less than he does!!! 0 -
add me! I have a skinny boyfriend and a healthy baby! All of our friends are skinny. I gained 90 pounds with pregnancy and I'm struggling to get it off!!!0
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Hi slimfast! Lol I totally feel your pain. I am white and married to an Asian. He and his entire family are incredibly skinny and cannot seem to gain weight even as they shovel piles of white rice, greasy noodles, meat with fat, and whatever else they want to eat. They don't exercise, either. Well....yeah. My kids are also skinny. Hey, good for them.
One problem, aside from being thought of as HUGE by my Asian family members, is that I am the "mom" that must prepare huge piles of food for them and then NOT eat it and STILL be judged for being huge. WTF, right? I have never been a big eater, I don't actually eat out, and have been a healthy eater. But if I eat like over 1600 per day, I will gain weight. Maintenance for me to be at around 170 is about 1400-1600, which most people consider to be their "dieting" food intake. And I am still overweight at 170. I am 5'9" and right now I am down from the 190s into almost 180, but I eat fewer than 1000 a day. Luckily, my ballet dancer daughter is helping and supporting me now, UNLIKE the rest of my family.
I like slimfast shakes, and adkins bars for the bfast and lunch hours, it makes life easy. Then for dinner, big bowls of soup such as pumpkin soup, roasted cauliflower soup, and black bean soup are low calorie and yet filling.
If your maintenance for 170 pounds is 1400 calories, you should 1. Make sure you're actually eating 1400 calories and not underestimating or 2. Go to a doctor. Seriously, that's weird. Good luck losing!0 -
Welcome my Dear. First steps are always the most difficult. My name is Donna. I've lost 39 lbs since January, quit smoking, and feel great! Some tips:
I incorporated a Fitbit tracker. It helps measure your activity and makes getting your butt in gear fun!
Garden Lites veggie souffle's are awesome and with a whole wheat sandwich thin, fresh spinach and kale, make a great lunch!
4 small meals a day - every 3 hours, really keep you going.
Water, water, water!
Green tea - make it yourself. No mixes.
Smoothies rule!
Move, move, move!
Real food. Prep ahead if you need to. You're worth the time and effort!
And lastly, get in touch if you need me :-) you got this!0 -
I feel your frustration ! this site has helped me in the past,so here I am again! I truly think weight lose has alot to do with why you want to be thin. And holding yourself accountable. So here we go lets do this for us!0
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I feel your frustration ! this site has helped me in the past,so here I am again! I truly think weight lose has alot to do with why you want to be thin. And holding yourself accountable. So here we go lets do this for us!
We're in this together....let's find success this time! I want this to be the last time I ever have to think about losing weight.
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I am glad that you found that site. I just have to lose a couple of pounds I have gained now during menopause,but have had a hard time to lose it. I never had to watch what I am eating and now found it extremely difficult to do that. I found this site and it is extremely helpful! Just by writing down what you are eating makes such a difference. Sometimes I think it is just a snack, just to realise that the snack has as many calories (or more) as a meal. Shakes are really convenient, I think, if you want to exchange one meal (for me it would be breakfast, because it is fast), but it does not teach you healthy eating or portion control or whatever. I fear that when you stop having shakes you will be back to the same-old-samae-old and gain weight again.
We are all here for you, rooting for you, cheering you on! You can do it!0 -
I am 37, 5'7" and started in January at 198. I am now almost to a healthy weight. Feel free to add me! I suggest getting off fad diets and committing to a lifestyle change. Eat healthy, but don't deprive yourself of the foods you love. Portion control and logging calories accurately has been key for me.0
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If you love shakes have you heard of Shakeology? I have been drinking it for 3 weeks and have lost 9lbs. It comes in different flavors and there is ways to save money and get it discounted. If you want more details message me. Feel free to add me for daily motivation0
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Im a single mom of 14 month old twins, considered morbidly obese and trying to loose the weight. I keep things like weight loss shakes and protein bars on hand to have on busy days so I dont eat whatever I want =D I just dont follow the diet plan of drink two shakes a day or whatever...I just use them for back up =D0
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ditch the slim fast. Focus on fruits, veges, whole grains, nuts and protien. Need to exercise, cardio and resistance. The diets reduce muscle, and the slows metablism. Believe me I did many of same things only to gain it all back then some.0
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You have to approach this site as a lifetime commitment like most of us have done. Miracles won't happen overnight. You have to stop eating fat foods and eat smareter. You also have to get more activity in your life. Wlaking is a good way to do it. Less calorie and more activity is the only long term answer. Don't eat ANY fast foods. very little sugar. You have to cut your carbs. You can do it, but you have to sick of being fat. You have to want to xhange who you are. There are ladies here who have lost 100lbs and more. But it took a lifestyle change. Get rid of the fad diets. Don't think of this as a diet, it is a life changing program tht you regulate, or not depends on how serious you are
Basil0 -
Oh, I understand! I've been heavy my whole life, going up and down from maybe 20 pounds overweight to 75 or so. Right now I'm at 225, trying to get to 150. That's still a little heavy but I'm trying to set a realistic goal - I'm 51 and pretty sedentary. I'm also diabetic, so while losing weight is essential, the insulin makes it almost impossible.
I was doing well on here, logging everything, sticking to 1200-1400 calories a day, walking an hour a day 5-6 times a week. I did that for 3 weeks and didn't lose an ounce. Then I went out to dinner one night, ate what I wanted, and gained 3 pounds of real fat - it was still there 2 days later. That frustrated me so much, it was kind of the last straw, and I fell into a horrible depression that saw me eating everything in sight, neglecting my meds and exercise, everything. I'm climbing back out now, went and saw my doctor - new to me since my old doctor retired. He was wonderful, listened to me rant for an hour almost, and put me on Wellbutrin to help with the depression as well as setting me up with a psych nurse practitioner in his office for counseling. I found a great treadmill on craigslist, so I can keep walking and get a more intense workout (it has incline and all sorts of nifty programs) this winter, so no excuse about the weather!
My husband is a wonderful man who wants to be supportive, but has a really hard time with his own eating. He weighs close to 400 lbs - his mom and brother are very heavy also - and is very much food = love. Plus his mom is a horribly unhealthy cook, no vegetables ever unless they're fried and drowned in ranch dressing, all meat is full of fat, everything fried, covered in gravy and or cheese. The good thing is that he's willing to try healthier recipes, but all the time he's yearning for chicken fried something with mashed potatoes and gravy, and he'll go for that at the drop of a hat. I get so tired sometimes, because I feel like I'm having to be responsible for both of us. I get so sick of thinking about food all the time - what to eat, how much to eat, when to eat it, blah blah.0 -
You should try the Whole 30 diet! It works really well and if you really stick with it, it shows great results! So what it is, is a 30 day diet (but you can keep it going if you want), but the thing is it's pretty hard and you have to have lots of self control (which was a problem for me). So you basically cannot have any: starches, breads, milk products, sugar... You are basically on a meat, veggie, and fruit diet (but not too much fruit because they have tons of sugar some times!) It's hard, but in 1month I lost 15 pounds! You also have to be ready to cook all of the time.
http://whole9life.com/2013/08/the-whole30-program/
I'll definitely look into this, thanks! I had never heard of this one before0 -
I completely understand what you are experiencing. I am 5'7 38 years old and 200 pounds. I am a mother of 2 of my own with 3 step kids. I have SKINNY surrounding me all the time. My kids will both be over 6'0 tall and weigh no more than 170 lbs ,as adults. My husband weighs 25 lbs less than me and I have always been larger than my friends. I am happy to go to your blog and share what daily routines haven't worked in the past.0
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My husband has always been skinny and sporty. And then he started exercising more and got kinda ripped... My best friend is a size 4. Pretty much everyone I know is either in great shape, or at least just thin - except my older kid, who takes after me (so on top of everything, I feel that it's my fault.)
So, yes, understanding and support is why I came to MFP boards. Right now I just want to send friend requests to everyone who posted in this thread!0 -
I'm so glad there are others out there that understand!
It sucks to weigh more than your husband. I cringe every time I see movies where the husband picks the wife up and swings her around or carries her over the threshold. That just isn't possible for me. I wish it was, and I hope to get there one day. Right now I weigh about 40 pounds more than my husband.
My husband-to-be (in 2 weeks!) is not skinny by any means, but he's fit. However when we met I was 35 lb heavier than he is, and now I am 10 lb lighter.
Anyway I just wanted to say I think there are many benefits to having a leaner guy. I was with really big guys (not always obese, but just huge like 6'5" and stuff) when I was younger, and I liked the idea of feeling tiny next to some of them but in the bedroom and in some other situations it's really nice having a guy who is around my own weight and has a flat stomach etc.0 -
Hi, I can relate! I am now a divorced mom of 1 standing at 5'7" and I'm currently down 15 pounds (since starting MFP) from 276 to 261 (I dipped lower than that (less than 1 pound) but had a minor gain and didn't want to record the gain because I know it's due to not enough water). I've done everything out there and am surrounded by slimmer people than me (some skinny slim and some not) and my son is 8 years old, standing over 4 and 1/2 feet tall and is basically a beanpole who would live off McDonald's and cookies if I let him. Lucky for me, he does like his veggies too and he knows that fast food makes mom "blow up" so we don't do a lot of fast food.
Please add me if you wish, I'm a cheerleader to everyone (cheering the logged in days, cheering the exercise and cheering up when support is needed). I agree with others, get away from the slim fast as quickly as possible. It's good for a start but it's not good for long term.
Remember this is a long haul thing. You need to change your habits and discover what your problem areas are. Remember to drink your water (not diet soda, milk, juice, tea etc but just plain water). Latest guidelines I read were at least 1/2 your body weight in ounces daily plus 16 oz if you're in a hot climate and at least another 16 oz to account for exercise. A lot of us experience what we think is hunger pangs and usually it's dehydration plus not enough water will cause you to retain water. I've also started to create a "Beast" mentality in regards to exercise and the gym. That means that I force myself to get to the gym at least 4 days a week for at least 45 minutes of cardio. I try to make sure to alternate days between upper body and lower body for weight training too because building muscle (or for my obese body, toning muscle) burns calories even during your resting periods. So I have adopted a Pilates instructor's mantra (the instructor is named Cassey Ho and her workouts and clothing line are available online, POP Pilates or Blogilates) which is "Train like a Beast, Look like a Beauty". It's tough because I'll admit, I hate exercise (okay, I know that's no surprise to my fellow "Losers" on this journey) but I do love how good I feel after I've exercised and I do love the results when I'm taking care of myself by eating right and exercising.
You can do this and starting your blog has already gotten you some "friends" who understand.0 -
My name is Carolyn. I am 61 and although I have always had a tendency to gain weight quickly, I did not keep myself in check years ago, thinking it would be so easy to lose that weight, boy did I find out differently. I found out I didn't have the self discipline I had before. I have tried every diet you can think of and a lot of exercise programs. I want to get back to that physical state when I felt like I controlled my body, not the other way around. I would appreciate the motivation to stay on track. Focus. Together, we can be excited for each other's improvement... and learn some new ways of eating and exercising.
Current weight 178, down from 188....inched up to 199 at one point. My husband is so skinny it makes me feel like I loom large around him.0 -
Hey. I am Caryn. I am mom to a 2 year old. I am not with her father, but I tend to be attracted to guys who are much skinnier than I am. It kind of makes me feel like a hypocrite for wanting them to be skinny when I am not skinny by any stretch of the imagination. I am 5'9" and I weigh about 210 right now. I would be more than happy to be a support for anyone that is serious about doing this together. I truly believe that having people there to support you along the way makes a huge difference.
SO FEEL FREE TO ADD ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE!!!0 -
I hope you are taking care of the hypothyroidism medically. If not, it will make it more difficult to lose. As for the PCOS, look into the research for high protein/low carb diets. They seem to help that condition.0
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I understand and am with you but you have to realize that losing the weight starts within YOU! It took me a LONG time to realize that! As someone else stated... ditch the Slim Fast. Start living a healthy lifestyle with 'clean eating' and exercise. Remember that this is a marathon, not a sprint. Also, it's not a diet, but a lifestyle change. Thus, when you hit your goal, you will not be going back, you will continue with your new eating plan and new foods, just on maintenance calories.
And yes, all my friends are skinny. I have some friends who are fitness guru's others that are PE teachers, still others look like models, so when I say I understand, I understand. Even when I was 284 pounds I understood!
ETA: someone mentioned hypothyroid... I also have that, and I'm here to say that you can STILL lose the weight! I did and am! I have no thyroid - they had to remove it due to cancer. I am also anemic and have other health issues. So I can really have tons of excuses but guess what??? there are NO Excuses! Yes I have a day or so where I have to just take a rest day but so what... I'm right back at it.
Bottom line, if you want it bad enough mentally and your mind is right... YOU CAN DO IT!!! :flowerforyou:0 -
Welcome!!! Feel free to add me.. always looking for new friends in this wild journey0
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