The husband store
bernied262
Posts: 882 Member
in Chit-Chat
A store that sells new husbands has opened in Manchester , just off Deansgate where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework...
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street with the same rules.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework...
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street with the same rules.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
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Replies
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TL; DR0
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The address of the second store is ?????
Do they do mail-order ???0 -
LOL....0
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I knew what was coming0
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Shut up and take my money.0
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Shut up and take my money.0
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Shut up and take my money.0
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Dangit, I thought I was going to get me a husband.0
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Lol nice0
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I was sold on floor 3 lol... Floor 4 was starting to seem needy lol0
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hahaha0
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my guy is all that and I didn't even have to try. Sure he's got flaws but so do I.
love this0 -
I was sold on floor 3 lol... Floor 4 was starting to seem needy lol
:laugh:0 -
Dangit, I thought I was going to get me a husband.
:laugh:0 -
I probably would have stopped on the first floor, if that is any indication of the men I have seen lately :grumble:0
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Haahahaahaha0
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I was sold on floor 3 lol... Floor 4 was starting to seem needy lol
Ha! I originally got off at floor1, later traded for floor 2, that didn't go so well so I moved to floor 3. Could be tempted to return to the first floor LOL0 -
tl;dr
on the M10 -
Where is this store? I need to get me there. Id settle for a biyfriend store with similar options!0
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The "scratch and dent/seconds" department is in the basement.
What is the return policy? Do you get a refund or just store credit?0 -
I mean boyfriend not biyfriend, def want him to be straight!0
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I will admit that a tiny part of me was hoping the husband store was real. Lol. A girl can dream right?0
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:laugh: I was sold on floor 3 too! I was thinking to myself "It's a trap!" when she kept going!!0
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Yeah, lol, floor 3 was cool with me.0
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Where can one return a husband. I have a receipt.0
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Oh that was really funny:laugh:0
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This content has been removed.
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I probably would have stopped on the first floor, if that is any indication of the men I have seen lately :grumble:
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Hahahaaa!!0 -
I was sold on floor 3 lol... Floor 4 was starting to seem needy lol0
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