My Story

I will be 49 in two months.

In my day, growing up, we played outside, always always outside. Walked everywhere and rode our bikes everywhere. I grew up pretty darn fit. I was also very much into fitness. I exercised daily, hung over, it didn't matter. I ate anything I wanted but I also was non stop movement.

I maintained 125 lbs well into my 30's. Oh and I'm 5'3, so I wasn't scrawny but I was very toned.

2004 (39 years old) is when the weight started creeping on. I was in a depressing relationship, on Prozac...exercise was obsolete and I survived on Ben & Jerrys.

2008, diagnosed with breast cancer but it all turned out well. They removed the tumor and the margins were clear. No chemo, just radiation. Something clicked in my head and I ended my 10 year relationship. I lost 30lbs between 2008-2009. It took longer than it should have because I would gain a little back and then lose it, gain, lose... you know the drill.

2010, went to see my sick sister in San Diego, came back so depressed with her prognosis. Back on Prozac and just couldn't kick it this time. Gained the 30lbs back. Then I got sick in 2012-2013, stomach problems, first started with an intestinal parasite then turned into Lymphocytic colitis. Not sure if there is a correlation. You would think I would lose weight, yeah right!

A little better this year, off of the Prozac in April and started exercising on June 16th. Then the worst imaginable thing happened. My 18 year old nephew passed away June 18th. I had to go back on meds. I just couldn't handle it. Gained 10 lbs in 3 months.

I stepped on the scale this past Sunday and knew that I needed to start something. I realized that I need to learn to grieve without food. I sometimes just get so angry with life that I want to eat it away. So I joined MFP to get some help.

Looking forward to looking and feeling good again, at least on the outside.