GET MY WIFE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

135

Replies

  • vickyplum
    vickyplum Posts: 193 Member

    Reprogram the tv parental locks so she cannot get to her favorite channels..

    Leave empty boxes of her favorite foods in the cupboard

    This would be so annoying!
    but way so funny
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
    Plastic wrap stretched tight over the toilet, then put the seat down. :laugh: Even if she discovers it when she sits down it will be a creapy surprise to have something touching her "there".


    Oh rats, I just saw someone posted this..................Let us know if you try it.
  • Just_Wil
    Just_Wil Posts: 108 Member
    If you have a hand sprayer at your kitchen sink, tape or rubber band the button down and point in general direction of victim. Then ask her to get you some water or just wait until she does it on her own.
  • Dr_Flo
    Dr_Flo Posts: 465
    Load her hair dryer with baking powder.. be sure to clean the edges so it doesnt look like you've done anything.
    The minute she turns it on (usually after a shower) the baking powder will fly out all over her hair and face.. sticking because shes still wet.

    It's an oldie.. but a goodie. *** EDIT *** Didnt notice that someone had already written this .. ok .. its time for the big guns..


    During your next sexual encounter .. wait till shes really into it .. and yell out her sister/mom's name .. LMAO .. Then see how long you can stay on. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand go.
  • Tiff050709
    Tiff050709 Posts: 497 Member
    Cook her a nice dinner. Be very careful with pranking your wife, it could backfire

    haha I love this response!
  • sunnyskys2013
    sunnyskys2013 Posts: 159 Member
    Remember somethings you can't take back and you have to live with her:laugh:
  • jessilyn76
    jessilyn76 Posts: 532 Member
    dirty sanchez
  • lewandt
    lewandt Posts: 566 Member
    Do you have a buddy that can help you out? This is one my dad did to a friend of his that owns a bar.

    His friend was bar tending one night and my dad pretended to be drunk. When his friend was not looking he poured a can of stew on the bar then pretended to be passed out next to it. His friend was really mad and put on long rubber gloves to clean it up with and a guy sitting next to him started picking up the chunks and eating them (they had that planned out of course).

    The were kicked out of the bar for 2 weeks but said it was worth it!

    Someone mentioned the cardboard cut out in the back seat of the car...that one would get me!
  • teesfood
    teesfood Posts: 77
    Wow some extremists on here much???? Anywho, me and my ex used to have water wars. One time I got a water gun, put it in the freezer before the water actually froze and lit his @ss up when he came home from work. LOL those were the days =) I also took a baby doll head and took the eyes out, then put a glow stick in the head. LMAO!!! Thats a good one. Happy Pranking! I'm also for the cling wrap. My sister and cousins did that to my brother's Civic - HEEEEEELARIOUS!
  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    If she eats sushi or some other bite sized food, put a little bit of Blair's 3AM Reserve on it. It's hot pepper extract and will burn for DAYS if you put a full dropper on whatever she eats.
  • sunnyskys2013
    sunnyskys2013 Posts: 159 Member
    Buy womans underware, remove the tags, soil them and hide them somewhere she will find them.

    Coming from a woman i wouldn't advise this!! You just want to prank her not make her leave you.
  • Firefighter4ever
    Firefighter4ever Posts: 110
    Super glue all the toilets seats up and hide every roll of TP.
  • missbutton82
    missbutton82 Posts: 119 Member
    If your shower is open at the top, get a cup of cold water and pour it over on her while she is in the shower. Then next time you take a shower, lock the door. :wink:
  • alliemarie77
    alliemarie77 Posts: 378 Member
    My husband and I used to play pranks on each other all the time.

    He wrote Nair on the front of the shampoo bottle and turned it so I couldn't see until I picked it up and turned the bottle.

    I took all of the toothpaste out of the bathroom and left a tube of preparation H where the tooth paste usually sits.

    He turned the cold water on while I was in the shower.

    I poured ice water over the shower.

    He waited till I was in mid sit to pee and ran in to scare me.

    I put Vaseline on the toilet seat.

    He put a cardboard cut out of a man in front of the front door inside the house.

    I put jelly beans under his seat cover in his truck.

    He put a hen (chicken) in the back of my truck and didn't lock the door on the cage.

    I put a spider in the shower.
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
    Tape the sprayer handle down on the sink and point it toward her. The next time she turns on the faucet, she'll get soaked.

    I did this for april fools. guess who forgot it was taped and turned on the water?
  • hughtwalker
    hughtwalker Posts: 2,213 Member
    Ask her "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY she does it?" - alternatively, if you find this funny rather than unrepeatably expletive then have a baby? That should sew your feet to the ground, with or without the divorce.
  • WinniDePoux
    WinniDePoux Posts: 48
    Re lace all her shoe laces so they tie at the bottom of her shoes.
    Bag up all her best clothes. Hide them & say you gave all the old clothes to charity collectors.
    Buy some cream for a contagious disease. Squeeze a bit out of the tube & leave it in the medicine cabinet.
    Buy a load of cheap white clothes from the charity store. Dye them pink & leave them in the washing machine. Tell her you did the laundry & you washed her work clothes/kids clothes.

    Now, see, there ARE things to do that are fun without going too far! Jokes including feces are just nasty and I certainly can't imagine wanting to be married to someone who thinks it is OK. The plastic wrap over the toilet would be funny in the middle of the night so long as you don't wake up groggy and forget about it :-)
  • WinniDePoux
    WinniDePoux Posts: 48
    Re-arrange all of her clothes in her dresser drawers. IE... move her panties and bras to a different drawer.

    When she puts her purse down, move it to a different spot, in a different room of the house. Works with her cell phone too.

    Put fake tics or some other type of fake bug on her side of the bed, under the blankets. Fake bugs in the shower, or in the sink in the bathroom.

    Giant rubber snake curled up in the toilet.

    Freeze her side of the bed. (This requires a big bag of ice, make sure it doesn't leak,) I used a couple of Glad gallon size freezer bags. Put the ice on her side of the bed a half hour before she goes to bed, and make sure you are able to remove it before she goes to bed, without being seen, obviously..

    Wait till she falls asleep, then put an ice cube down her pj's.

    Call her someone else's name when you are making love to her.

    I was just thinking that this guy is a master... then I read the last bit. Seriously? The point of a joke is to get her annoyed, not to plant seeds of doubt into her psychy about your fidelity. She will never, NEVER 100% believe that you were joking.
  • jbuck93
    jbuck93 Posts: 89 Member
    I didn't read all of the ideas, but put a rubber band around the kitchen sink sprayer so when she turns on the faucet it spays her.
  • escloflowneCHANGED
    escloflowneCHANGED Posts: 3,038 Member
    Step 1:

    Buy Lego's the same colour as your bathroom floor

    Step 2:

    While she is in the shower, place them on the floor.

    Step 3:

    Prepare the couch for an extended visit!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,024 Member
    Do the shampoo trick. While she's rinsing shampoo out of her hair (her eyes will be closed), squeeze more on top of her head. She'll get frustrated that it's not rinsing out!

    Or get an empty can of nuts and put a bunch of meal worms in it and leave it on the table.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • hughtwalker
    hughtwalker Posts: 2,213 Member
    J.buck93
    I am hoping you meant "sprays". (Unless "spays" means something else wherever it is you are)
  • Miss_Meliss86
    Miss_Meliss86 Posts: 372 Member
    Step 1:

    Buy Lego's the same colour as your bathroom floor

    Step 2:

    While she is in the shower, place them on the floor.

    Step 3:

    Prepare the couch for an extended visit!

    If you EVER do that to me, you will need to prepare your friends place for an extended visit :flowerforyou:
  • lessofme43
    lessofme43 Posts: 139 Member
    I agree with the poster about being careful about pranking the wife, it could backfire - just ask my husband ;) One of my favorites, which is far more innocent than some that are mentioned here (fesces would be grounds for divorce, in my books!), is when he's in the shower, I sneak in with a container of cold water and dump it on him from overtop. It's great shock value, usually no mess to clean up - keep it clean & fun!
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member

    Reprogram the tv parental locks so she cannot get to her favorite channels..

    Leave empty boxes of her favorite foods in the cupboard

    Love these.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    Lmao consider yourself lucky that you have a wife who is hilarious and cool as hell!
  • MinMin97
    MinMin97 Posts: 2,674 Member
    Buy her a bouquet of roses, some chocolates and some fine wine. Of course.
  • capnrus789
    capnrus789 Posts: 2,736 Member
    Red Kool Aid powder in the shower head. It'll look like Psycho in there!
  • samammay
    samammay Posts: 468
    Sleep with her sister.
  • jenn26point2
    jenn26point2 Posts: 429 Member
    Do you have access to paperclippings? or anything like that, that you can collect? If so then fill her handbag up with the clippings before she goes out.

    This... she'll keep finding them for weeks and will laugh every time she does - best to use the little dots that are acquired when using a hole punch. :)
    Replace the contents of her purse with jelly beans..
    Reprogram the tv parental locks so she cannot get to her favorite channels..
    Take away the safety key to the treadmill
    Leave empty boxes of her favorite foods in the cupboard

    All of this is hilarious! The jelly beans. So funny. The parental locks thing would be maddening, and the ultimate prank! I think I'll do that to my hubby. lol
    One of my favorites, which is far more innocent than some that are mentioned here (fesces would be grounds for divorce, in my books!), is when he's in the shower, I sneak in with a container of cold water and dump it on him from overtop. It's great shock value, usually no mess to clean up - keep it clean & fun!

    lmao that's hilarious!

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