When did people notice?

I know this varies from person to person and there are many factors on how long it takes for other people to notice weight loss. This is one of my issues. First, I don't want all the attention/questions that come with it, yet I want people to somewhat recognize. I am larger so I know it will take a little while for other people to notice. I was on ww before this and lost 10 lbs. I'm down 18 with MFP. One experience last week really had me thinking. I switched my work hours to workout in the morning as it is the best time for me. I get up between 5-530, hit the gym, then home to get my kids off to school and have to be to work at 8:30. Most people at work think I sleep in until they figure out that I've been up at the gym.

Well last week I'm in my manager's office, she starts talking about how tired she is. She's less than 100 lbs and maybe 5ft tall, NEVER exercises. When I tell her I had a good workout, she looked straight at me and said "why do you even try?" As in, no one can tell, why would you subject yourself to that. For a minute I was annoyed, and then told her I like the stress relief. I never mentioned my weight loss or that I was even trying. But let's be honest, those 28lbs that I've lost were well fought for and sometimes, even though I can tell a small difference, sometimes I want someone else to notice. I just remember after that conversation sitting at my desk feeling slightly disappointed. At that moment I could've thrown in the towel. But the tiger in me wouldn't let me cave. Sometimes that's how it starts, I let their negative talk get to me and I start to believe it. Thankfully I didn't cave in and stop. But unfortunately my mind has that conversation on rewind and every time I think about that conversation, I want to punch her in the face.

So when was it for you? 10 lbs, 20, 50? Was it not a specific loss but when you wore new clothes? etc...

Replies

  • bkyoun
    bkyoun Posts: 371 Member
    First of all, great job on your first 28 pounds. It takes a lot of hard work to get where you are and you should be proud of yourself.

    It can take a while for people to notice if you are bigger. I have lost 40 pounds now but since I started at 330, people still don't really notice yet.

    Just keep at it and they will start to notice. Don't let what your manager said get to you. When people around you don't have faith in you, you have to use that for motivation and have more faith in yourself.

    You can do this! Just keep swimming.

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  • Abbaprincess
    Abbaprincess Posts: 36 Member
    I think you have to focus on why you are losing weigh. Even if you are losing to look better, you are the one that should notice. I bet your clothes are looser and your step is lighter. Don't let dumb skinny people that eat a grape and are full mess with your head. You are doing great and one day people will notice, but until then take a good look in the mirror and be proud!
  • StheK
    StheK Posts: 443 Member
    I lost about 80 lbs before people started to really notice. It was great the first couple times that people said something, because I was starting to wonder if I was crazy! But after the first couple, I quickly became very uncomfortable with the attention. I almost allowed it to sabotage me, but I have managed to keep things under control while I come to terms with the reactions from people. Best of luck to you!
  • I'm a bigger then the average person. I started at 6'1" 276. I started getting a few comments after about 30 - 35 lbs lost. I'm down to 225 now and I get a few comments everyday.

    Congrats on your first 18 down.
  • srogers89
    srogers89 Posts: 190 Member
    Wow! Congrats on your weight loss :) Such a terrific effort and I'm glad you don't plan on quitting after your boss' comment.

    I have only lost just under 10lbs and am aiming for a total loss of about 15lbs. Not many people in my life have noticed, even my best girlfriends who I see weekly, although a work colleague did say to me the other day it looked like I had lost weight.

    I actually think new clothes will help as larger clothes (even if they are baggy on you) will always make you look a little larger. Good luck on your continued journey! I'm sure one day they are all going to turn around and say WOW where did all that weight go....and you can proudly say you don't know, but you know it isn't coming back.
  • CONGRATS ON LOOSING 28 POUNDS :D That's an amazing achievement and you should be absolutely proud of yourself!

    I actually had a similar incident like yours. I lost my first ten pounds and I was so excited that I just HAD to tell someone. I worked so hard for those ten pounds, a lot of tears and dedication went into that weight loss. The nearest person to me was my father so I excitedly went up to him and told him of my mini achievement. What I expected was some sort of 'congrats' or something positive. Instead, what he said was "Really? You look like you gained 10 instead." After that comment, I just wanted to quit. I mean, what was the point of trying so hard to loose weight if no one even noticed? But instead, I refused. I knew from the start that my weight loss journey was going to be a long road and people were not going to see a difference overnight. It's been about 4 months since I started and I've started to really notice my weight loss around the 3 month mark. Other people started noticing it around that time as well because my collarbones magically appeared xD

    Sorry for rambling but my point is that its going to take time and people are not always going to be supportive. But you can do this! You've already achieved an amazing 28 pound loss and that's not an easy task. Like what byyoun said, just keep on swimming :D you can do this!
  • People seem to notice right away on me. I think because my weight is mostly on my upper body closer to my face. I think it takes longer to notice on the pear shaped girls.
  • thepetiterunner
    thepetiterunner Posts: 1,238 Member
    Congrats on your progress and your determination to continue! That's fantastic!

    I would however, caution you on dwelling on other people's reactions to your journey. Lots of people don't react for a lot of reasons - maybe they don't know what to say, are jealous, don't really notice because they're oblivious, are private and don't want to ask you about it, etc. Focusing on you and not other people's outward reactions will serve you well in the long run. Eventually people might say something, but you might not like it. A lot of people have the experience that they drop a lot of weight and all of a sudden people start noticing and say "you're getting too skinny" "you don't need to diet so much" "I'm worried you're losing too much weight" and things along those lines.

    Do this for you and remember that this is for you and you alone. No one else.
  • ronrstaats
    ronrstaats Posts: 294 Member
    I started at 335 and I don't think I had people notice till I had lost about 50 pounds. That was my coworkers. I repair copiers so I see Customers sporadically through out the year and some of them saw it come off gradually some of them didn't see me for a year (I had lost 150 pounds) and didn't even know it was me. The latest one I hadn't seen in over 10 years (When I weighed 400+) she asked me if I was sick. LOL
  • smc864
    smc864 Posts: 570 Member
    I'm pretty short so after I lost about 15 lbs people at work started noticing. I think it depends on your height, body shape and the type of clothing that you wear. Don't let what she said discourage you... so rude of her. You're doing an amazing job! 28 pounds is awesome!!
  • Katkamm77
    Katkamm77 Posts: 108 Member
    I think when people see you everyday it takes longer for them to notice a change. I've lost 45 lbs. and when I look in the mirror I really don't notice a difference. I had to buy smaller pants (2 sizes smaller!) or else I would think my scale was off. I'm 5'9" so I figured it would take longer to notice. I'm just starting to get comments from friends. It feels good that it's finally showing.
    Good luck!
  • jmp463
    jmp463 Posts: 266 Member
    I was surprised some people noticed after 10lbs. Around 15lbs everyone who knows me really could tell. I was lucky that I was able to lose that first 15lbs pretty quick. So that made me feel good.

    Good luck - just stick with it!! If I can do it anyone can.
  • kj26boys
    kj26boys Posts: 73 Member
    Thanks for the support! I know I'm doing it for me and I really didn't expect her to say anything. It was just the way she looked at me and had a disgusted smirk on her face. Also because I do keep my weight loss journey to myself for the most part, it took a lot for me to share with her and perhaps I wasn't ready for her reaction? It's hard to believe that someone wouldn't view that positively- although I know there are plenty of negative saboteurs. And now that she knows I work out in the morning I hope she doesn't try to demand I start work earlier (she's kind of a vindictive person). Oh well. I am proud of myself for coming this far and I'm pretty competitive so I don't plan on giving up any time soon! :tongue:

    P.S. One of the many reasons I started this journey was to feel more confident when applying for new jobs.
  • Great job on your loss. My closest friends and husband saw a difference right away (like after 10 pounds they were seeing it in my face). I have lost 30 pounds now and my neighbors have not noticed. I think people that are the closest to you will see it first.
  • lesteidel
    lesteidel Posts: 229 Member
    It took about forty or so pounds for those in my every day life to notice.

    People who lived further away from me noticed immediately, long before that mark.

    Remember, weight loss happens slowly. It may just be a slow enough change that those around you won't notice until it finally dawns on them one day, or until they see an older picture.

    And when people start noticing, they start commenting, and they start "giving advice" which in my case seemed to be more of an excuse on their part to critique anything that went in my mouth, it got old, really quick. I say enjoy the people being oblivious.

    I remember one girls way of telling me she noticed was to tell me I would get fat again if I ate the go chocolate bar in my hand. Way to ruin my treat.
  • kj26boys
    kj26boys Posts: 73 Member
    And when people start noticing, they start commenting, and they start "giving advice" which in my case seemed to be more of an excuse on their part to critique anything that went in my mouth, it got old, really quick. I say enjoy the people being oblivious.

    I remember one girls way of telling me she noticed was to tell me I would get fat again if I ate the go chocolate bar in my hand. Way to ruin my treat.

    Yeah. I have already seen some people who share and the treatment they get so usually keep it to myself. That stinks about the candy bar. As if you can't have one in your life now that you are watching what you eat. Good grief.

    I have such a round face and think it's one of the last places I lose from so I think that might be something too.
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    yes. at work they had cookies today and I wasnt even interested in having one. but two people in my office instantly became the cookie police to make sure I wasn't eating one. lol
  • A lot of good points have been made above.

    My 2 cents...
    1. Remember people are VERY self centered and many of them simply don't take the time to notice, which on the other hand means they probably didn't notice and/or remember that you were 28 pounds heavier to begin with
    2. Some people are reluctant to comment on weight loss in case the person really HASN'T lost weight, then it comes out as kind of "didn't you used to be fatter?" KWIM?
  • I just joined this site... its awesome~!! I just weighed myself today and found that I have lost 13 lbs. THAT IS A MIRACLE FOR ME!
    So being excited, I told my husband my good news! His response was: "Where?" I was so discouraged when he commented like that to me. I was expecting "Wow! You can do it!" But nooo, he was not optimistic. So I decided to do this for MYSELF.I do not have support at home but I am hoping to make friends here and that will help so much. Comments from others are not always what we want to hear.....but, don't let it discourage you. I'm not going to let my comment I received STOP me~!! yayyy.


    I
  • SmangeDiggs
    SmangeDiggs Posts: 238 Member
    Ive lost 20kg but its come off so slowly i don't think anybody really notices, moving job and countries probably hasn't helped either. Mostly i don't even notice the difference, although my husband i assures me i look smaller.
    I was called for an extra shift by work the other week and told them im at the gym until 1100 on my days off and here reply was ''well you would think you would be skinner then'', needless to say i didn't do the extra shift that day.
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
    I'm just now starting to get spontaneous comments from people who I haven't told that I'm trying to lose weight, at 48 pounds lost. I'm surprised that it took this much, but others on here seem to have had a similar experience of not getting comments until that point.
  • Spiderkeys
    Spiderkeys Posts: 338 Member
    Seems like you need to change jobs and get a new manager.

    I've lost over 40 pounds, no one has noticed or commented yet, but I can now fit in my old clothes, got more energy, feel lighter, got a neck again, just people don't pay attention to our appearance as much as we do ourselves.
  • redhotbeads
    redhotbeads Posts: 62 Member
    I'm so glad I found this thread. I was really beginning to wonder if anyone would notice. *I* definitely notice, in looser pants and a smaller stomach, and my husband has noticed, but general people in my life have not. That's OK, though, I'm definitely feeling better already. I'm down 16 lbs, and I know I hid it well when I gained it, so it stands to reason I'd hide it well when I lose it! :)
  • danimalkeys
    danimalkeys Posts: 982 Member
    I'm a bigger then the average person. I started at 6'1" 276. I started getting a few comments after about 30 - 35 lbs lost. I'm down to 225 now and I get a few comments everyday.

    Congrats on your first 18 down.

    That's right about where I was (same height/, about the same weight) , and right about the same amount of weight loss where people started to comment. People who I haven't seen in a long time really comment because I'm down around 65lbs total now.
  • arrseegee
    arrseegee Posts: 575 Member
    My highest weight is 17 kg heavier than I am now, and after I'd lost 10 kg I started getting comments, particularly from people who hadn't seen me for 2-3 months. The majority of the comments are really positive, but I have had one person tell me my face looked drawn and had I been very stressed, and someone else claimed I'd lost too much weight. Then again, both those people met me during my highest weight period, whereas everyone else who commented has known me for a much longer time and my current weight is my 'normal' weight to them.

    PS Your boss is a *kitten*, that's a nasty thing to say!
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    I have lost 36 pounds but have done it very slowly. Most people who see me often really have not noticed (except my husband). Other people who see me less often notice that something is different but sometimes don't know what. Just remember SHE was tired and you weren't. You have built up stamina and shed excess weight to give you more energy.
    Would you rather be skinny and tired?:huh: