Marijuana and fat...

Hi,

So I have been a very heavy marijuana smoker for a very long time (and please--- I don't want any grief over it).
Anyway, I am finishing graduate school in a little less than a month and applying for big fancy jobs, many of which do not care that it is legal in my great state, and will drug test upon hire.

Initially, I thought nothing of it, as I planned on stopping for a month or so to clear my urine, but I recently learned that with my past level of cannabanoid intake, sloth-like metabolism, and body weight, it could be as much as 90 days to completely leave my particular system (which is just ridiculous). I cannot wait 3 months though to start applying for work and so I must speed the process with dreaded exercise and better eating habits. Ugh!

So I was hoping for some tips on how to increase my metabolism, and massively cut my fat % in a short period of time. If I go like the wind, how much fat can I hope to burn away in a month? And what sort of exercise would be best for me? I don't really care about being buff, or yo-yoing back a little bit down the road, I just need to remove some silly chemicals from my fat cells.

Anyway, thanks for your time, and hopefully the helpful advice!

Oh, and I'm male, 5'9, and 187lbs if it matters
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Replies

  • TrishaLeighNelson
    TrishaLeighNelson Posts: 258 Member
    You can buy all natural drink from headshops that will clear your systen
  • Macstraw
    Macstraw Posts: 896 Member
    You can buy all natural drink from headshops that will clear your systen

    The only problem with this is if the prospective employer uses a hair testing method instead of urine - even if these drinks work, they won't "cleanse" it from the hair & the hair test can check back much further along the timeline, especially in the case of long hair......
  • Nah... I thought about that stuff, but who knows how many offers (and then UA's) I'd have to do- I don't want to spend a week drinking gallons of water and expensive cleansers all over Washington & what if I fail even with the drinks... I think my best bet is unbearable exercise and clean living... Just unsure what the most efficient way to go about is.
  • pyrowill
    pyrowill Posts: 1,163 Member
    Regrettably this is the sort of lesson you need to learn when it comes to this sort of things.

    Pretty much best way to clean your system out and ramp up your metabolism, do some hardcore resistance training and cardio work, perhaps google HIIT. Take antioxidants. shower every day. Blah blah blah.
  • lauren3101
    lauren3101 Posts: 1,853 Member
    Those drinks or 'flushing agents' don't work.

    The only way you can actually 'increase' your metabolism is to gain LBM. Muscle uses more calories than fat, so by having more muscle, you will essentially have a bigger metabolism. However you aren't going to gain any significant amount of muscle in the short space of time you have.

    Unfortunately I would say you just need to suck it up, exercise and eat healthily, stop smoking, and apply in 3 months. Go for a job that doesn't require you to take a drug test in the meantime.

    Hindsight is a wonderful thing.
  • KnM0107
    KnM0107 Posts: 355 Member
    If they give you urine test you will need to dilute it your system by drinking a lot of water. Basically by test time all you are peeing out is water you just drank. Depending on the company " pale" urine could be flagged for tampering and you would have to retake it or they may just withdraw the job offer. If you have to have a hair test all I can say is get a razor and shave. I wouldn't waste my money on any products from a head shop.
  • RllyGudTweetr
    RllyGudTweetr Posts: 2,019 Member
    Those drinks or 'flushing agents' don't work.

    The only way you can actually 'increase' your metabolism is to gain LBM. Muscle uses more calories than fat, so by having more muscle, you will essentially have a bigger metabolism. However you aren't going to gain any significant amount of muscle in the short space of time you have.

    Unfortunately I would say you just need to suck it up, exercise and eat healthily, stop smoking, and apply in 3 months. Go for a job that doesn't require you to take a drug test in the meantime.

    Hindsight is a wonderful thing.
    Dingding! Got it in one. The show "Manswers" on SpikeTV busted the "flush out your system" myth a while ago. Good luck, OP.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    I thought this post was a joke at first, but I guess it's not.

    This is meant as no judgment on you, but your choices are clear: (1) let the pot naturally leave your system, which means you can't smoke any for awhile, and apply for that dream job in three months, (2) stop smoking pot all together and let the pot naturally leave your system and apply for that dream job in three months, (3) continue smoking pot and apply for that dream job and hope that you pass your drug test, or (4) continue smoking pot and know that you can't apply for the dream job because you are a "healthy pot smoker," and go apply for a job where they don't do drug testing.

    Flushing is not going to get rid of anything because there is no such thing as flushing, except as in flushing a toilet, Your body naturally flushes out your system. Working out and eating well will make you healthier, and you may lose some pounds, but it will not get rid of the pot in your system any quicker either.

    If you want your dream job, then make it happen.
  • TrishaLeighNelson
    TrishaLeighNelson Posts: 258 Member
    Uh, no. it works. From personal experience of.being a heavy smoker. Dont believe everythong you hear or.read
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    You'll be fine stop smoking now. If they hair test different story, but most companies dont. Exercise now, burn off some fat, but a few days before take your body out of fat burning mode since THC is stored in fat and released during lipolysis. Drink lots of fluids including drinks with sugar, and have some extra carbohydrates. The day before eat a nice carbohydrate and fat rich breakfast and hydrate yourself with gatorade/powerade enough, not to dilute your urine, but so it is a very light yellow.

    No judgement here why a tax paying, responsible, voting grown adult cannot enjoy cannabis in the privacy of his or her own home is ridiculous to me.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    If they give you urine test you will need to dilute it your system by drinking a lot of water. Basically by test time all you are peeing out is water you just drank. Depending on the company " pale" urine could be flagged for tampering and you would have to retake it or they may just withdraw the job offer. If you have to have a hair test all I can say is get a razor and shave. I wouldn't waste my money on any products from a head shop.

    yes be careful here with dilution if this is the other option B vitamins and creatine supplement
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    You can clear your system with a gallon or two of water. You don't need to speed up your metabolism. Cannabis isn't stored in stored fat. It clings to the fat cells in your urine. Drink water until your urine is clear and you can pass any drug test for cannabis. Other drugs work differently though.

    Coincidentally, I'm not trying to give you grief. But sooner or later, this bad habit will catch up to you. What if your employer does random drug screens and not just pre-employment drug screens?
  • SF2514
    SF2514 Posts: 794 Member
    Those drinks or 'flushing agents' don't work.

    The only way you can actually 'increase' your metabolism is to gain LBM. Muscle uses more calories than fat, so by having more muscle, you will essentially have a bigger metabolism. However you aren't going to gain any significant amount of muscle in the short space of time you have.

    Unfortunately I would say you just need to suck it up, exercise and eat healthily, stop smoking, and apply in 3 months. Go for a job that doesn't require you to take a drug test in the meantime.

    Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

    I think they may work as well. I had a friend who used one when she was a heavy meth user. Worked for her I guess.
  • PapaverSomniferum
    PapaverSomniferum Posts: 2,670 Member
    You can buy all natural drink from headshops that will clear your systen

    The only problem with this is if the prospective employer uses a hair testing method instead of urine - even if these drinks work, they won't "cleanse" it from the hair & the hair test can check back much further along the timeline, especially in the case of long hair......

    Hair tests are expensive. Most employers don't use them.

    Lots of very sweaty exercise coupled with green tea and cranberry juice works just about as well (or better than!) as the cleansing drinks, someone I met told me.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    Those drinks or 'flushing agents' don't work.

    The only way you can actually 'increase' your metabolism is to gain LBM. Muscle uses more calories than fat, so by having more muscle, you will essentially have a bigger metabolism. However you aren't going to gain any significant amount of muscle in the short space of time you have.

    Unfortunately I would say you just need to suck it up, exercise and eat healthily, stop smoking, and apply in 3 months. Go for a job that doesn't require you to take a drug test in the meantime.

    Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

    I think they may work as well. I had a friend who used one when she was a heavy meth user. Worked for her I guess.

    It's a common practice to use pectin to conceal chemicals in the urine. Basically, pectin coats the lining of the bladder and seals in the chemicals allowing the body to pass urine without collecting those particular toxins.
  • sloth3toes
    sloth3toes Posts: 2,212 Member
    First of all, if this is you....

    53343654_1084.jpg

    You posted your pic on the internet, along with your story about how you plan to fool prospective employers. Did ya post the same question on your Facebook page?

    And, were you high when you made your profile, and said you were a female?

    Good luck with the job search.
  • belgerian
    belgerian Posts: 1,059 Member
    Those drinks or 'flushing agents' don't work.

    The only way you can actually 'increase' your metabolism is to gain LBM. Muscle uses more calories than fat, so by having more muscle, you will essentially have a bigger metabolism. However you aren't going to gain any significant amount of muscle in the short space of time you have.

    Unfortunately I would say you just need to suck it up, exercise and eat healthily, stop smoking, and apply in 3 months. Go for a job that doesn't require you to take a drug test in the meantime.

    Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

    Any type of physical activity increases your metabalism, hence the term I burned xxx calories today on my run.
  • TheSink
    TheSink Posts: 97 Member
    Putting your picture on the internet and admitting your heavy marijuana usage is a good start.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    First of all, if this is you....

    53343654_1084.jpg

    You posted your pic on the internet, along with your story about how you plan to fool prospective employers. Did ya post the same question on your Facebook page?

    And, where you high when you made your profile, and said you were a female?

    Good luck with the job search.

    This is a good point. Social networking searches are probably more detrimental to you getting that job than passing a drug screen.

    C'mon, man, you're about to have a master's degree... be smarter than this.

    I've been there and lived that. Marijuana will inevitably damage your future. It's time to grow up.
  • I actually was put on leave from a job because of marijuana use and had to enter an outpatient program as a requirement to get my job back. I was a heavy user. I hate to tell you this, but I was moderately overweight and tested positive for 60 DAYS after last use. I was also losing weight quickly at the time (depression, no munchies). I was shocked at how long it stayed in my system. Haven't used for over 2 years now, btw. It's much easier to stay a healthy weight now - lol. Good luck.
  • Windzer
    Windzer Posts: 104
    You can use synthetic urine to get by. I have done this in the past, and it worked perfectly.
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    just quit. i quit 8 months ago never looked back. best decision i ever made.
  • csteuter
    csteuter Posts: 87 Member
    First, at 5'9" and 187 pounds, you are not too far overweight ... Stop smoking TODAY. Can you? If you are a heavy smoker, you have an emotional dependence on weed. I'm not sure how being a heavy weed smoker works for you and getting through graduate school, but you have managed. Don't try to fool the system, just stop smoking TODAY. You will be in decent shape in 30 days. And, if you have not even interviewed yet, realize that it takes a length of time between all the interviews, job offer, then drug screening. You probably have more than 30 days built into your schedule already. Not judging here, but you need a clear head to function properly. Good luck.
  • Stage14
    Stage14 Posts: 1,046 Member
    1. The drinks do work, but only for a short window of time. And they're expensive (usually $30-$40 a pop for the ones that won't flag for dilution or goldenseal).

    2. If the employer does a hair test (which is highly unlikely), OP is screwed anyway.

    3. There is no real way to "speed up" your metabolism to the point of burning off 3 months worth of fat/calories in one month or less. It's just not possible. But as someone else said, THC isn't stored in fat cells so that part doesn't really matter. Stop smoking, drink a ton of water every day, and when you're ready to start applying , go get an at-home testing kit for THC to see if you're clear yet. You probably will be.
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
    No judgement here why a tax paying, responsible, voting grown adult ...

    Hmm. That's a bit of an assumption. Adult, I'll give you. The rest, who knows. But it doesn't matter, OP makes his own choices as do we all.

    Anyway, OP, don't listen to the 'flushing products work' crowd. They absolutely don't work if that sample is sent to any kind of reputable testing lab (there are plenty of labs that aren't that great). Best not to take chances.
  • justdoit613
    justdoit613 Posts: 1 Member
    Cardio then steam room
    and drink plenty of water
  • bmoliv66
    bmoliv66 Posts: 47 Member
    Regardless of what works or doesn't work I would still wait as long as I could before the tests. 6 weeks or more. Sure people have done this and that and it worked... But they have also failed. If you are serious enough about your career choices to go to grad school, I wouldn't risk it.
  • Windzer
    Windzer Posts: 104
    1. The drinks do work, but only for a short window of time. And they're expensive (usually $30-$40 a pop for the ones that won't flag for dilution or goldenseal).

    2. If the employer does a hair test (which is highly unlikely), OP is screwed anyway.

    3. There is no real way to "speed up" your metabolism to the point of burning off 3 months worth of fat/calories in one month or less. It's just not possible. But as someone else said, THC isn't stored in fat cells so that part doesn't really matter. Stop smoking, drink a ton of water every day, and when you're ready to start applying , go get an at-home testing kit for THC to see if you're clear yet. You probably will be.

    I believe this to be incorrect, THC is stored in fat cells. I stopped smoking for 3 months a long time ago, while losing weight, and failed a test once. So in my experience THC can be stored in fat cells
  • The marijuana stays in most bodies at least 30 days regardless of body fat. I would recommend stop smoking immediately, start exercising on a daily basis, flushing your system daily with water, steam baths help cleanse your body of impurities, there are shampoos that work on cleaning your hair follicles and the cleansing drinks use to work. My experience is from 10 years ago and I would believe the testing has improved.

    If you know any one who has to go see a probation officer and is subject to being tested on a regular or random basis would be a good resource to talk to. These people would know all the tricks
  • sillygoosie
    sillygoosie Posts: 1,109 Member
    water, water, water, water, water. And quit smoking. Hey, I love to self medicate but if it was a choice between that or a good job, the job wins. Welcome to adulthood.
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