Halp, My Protein Farts Are Killing Me!

Is there a food I could eat that will counteract the offensive odors that are being forcefully expelled out of my southern region?
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Replies

  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    Asparagus. That way your piss will smell too.
  • Keiras_Mom
    Keiras_Mom Posts: 844 Member
    Asparagus. That way your piss will smell too.

    And wash it all down with coffee. Nothing better than coffee pee once the asparagus wears off.
  • LoggingForLife
    LoggingForLife Posts: 504 Member
    Omg....me too.
  • jennk5309
    jennk5309 Posts: 206 Member
    Digestive Advantage Gas Defense Formula (it's a probiotic)- Like $8 at walmart. Seriously, it works. My family can stand being around me now, lol.
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    I literally made my own eyes water just a few minutes ago. Last night, my dog was even looking at me sideways.
  • Jacson53
    Jacson53 Posts: 62 Member
    3 days ago I added a BCAA pre-workout drink to my post-workout whey protein drink.
    Have noticed an increase to my carbon footprint.
    Is there a connection? Seems to have an air of probability.


    So I'd like some diet advice also...
  • srcardinal10
    srcardinal10 Posts: 387 Member
    Asparagus. That way your piss will smell too.

    LMFAO!!!!!!!!!
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    Is there a food I could eat that will counteract the offensive odors that are being forcefully expelled out of my southern region?

    It seems the more logical approach would be to stop feeding your body so much of whatever it is that's causing it to do this.
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    Is there a food I could eat that will counteract the offensive odors that are being forcefully expelled out of my southern region?

    It seems the more logical approach would be to stop feeding your body so much of whatever it is that's causing it to do this.

    Putting 400lbs on my back and grunting like a primate while lifting it is not logical sir. Please see your logic out of this post.
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
    Beano?
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    live culture, fermented foods.
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    live culture, fermented foods.

    Yogurt? Would a protein shake with yogurt be an actual ailment?
  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    Is there a food I could eat that will counteract the offensive odors that are being forcefully expelled out of my southern region?

    It seems the more logical approach would be to stop feeding your body so much of whatever it is that's causing it to do this.

    Putting 400lbs on my back and grunting like a primate while lifting it is not logical sir. Please see your logic out of this post.

    Don't nuffin get in between me an mah gainz.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Do you have anyone who you can share a hot box with or I suggest riding the elevator alot
  • arghbowl
    arghbowl Posts: 1,179 Member
    Do you have anyone who you can share a hot box with or I suggest riding the elevator alot

    I'll share your hot box.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    MyS_BoxFronts_FullRes_.jpg

    What the hell, man?! Why is it all the way over to the side?
  • mojohowitz
    mojohowitz Posts: 900 Member
    beano.jpg
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    Do you have anyone who you can share a hot box with or I suggest riding the elevator alot

    I'll share your hot box.

    I'll be the one with the butt plug in case you get a little too carried away with Idrosophilia.
  • YesIAm17
    YesIAm17 Posts: 817 Member
    Ditch the Whey Protein and use Whey Isolate instead. Ditch the milk and use something that is lactose free, e.g. Almond Milk. Problem solved.

    You're+Welcome.gif
  • BAHAHAHA!!! I thought that was just a bonus feature!
  • tottie06
    tottie06 Posts: 259 Member
    Men are supposed to stink
  • AZ_Gato
    AZ_Gato Posts: 1,270 Member
    I always thought protein farts were just a way of life, a rite of passage.

    Sort of like DOMS, taking painkillers had never crossed my mind until I got on this site.
  • Anyanut
    Anyanut Posts: 27 Member
    Seriously, this whole post is hilarious! ... and informative ...
  • Anti fart-smell shorts here: http://under-tec.com/
  • smc864
    smc864 Posts: 570 Member
    Ditch the Whey Protein and use Whey Isolate instead. Ditch the milk and use something that is lactose free, e.g. Almond Milk. Problem solved.

    You're+Welcome.gif


    ^^This!!! Switching to Whey Isolate changed my life.:bigsmile:
  • chelseac1014
    chelseac1014 Posts: 43 Member
    I always wondered why i have more gas now and it's been happening since I've upped my protein ????
  • Some_Watery_Tart
    Some_Watery_Tart Posts: 2,250 Member
    Hold it in the crockpot until you're near someone you can blame it on--like your kids. Also, my protein farts have been known to make the dog leave the room in disgust.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    I always wondered why i have more gas now and it's been happening since I've upped my protein ????

    It's been happening to me since I bought Quest bars, but it's probably the 17 g of fiber and not the protein. :wink:
  • Crystal_Pistol
    Crystal_Pistol Posts: 750 Member
    You could put dryer sheets in your underwear over your *kitten*... Mask the odor, freshen the room.
  • anaconda469
    anaconda469 Posts: 3,477 Member
    My protein farts happen when I am riding my bike. It's like having JATO (jet assisted take off) so I ride faster.