So sick of it!!!

Im soooooo sick of this game.
I lose 2 lb and gain 3 lose 2 again and gain 4.

I eat 1200-1500cal a day.
And yes i do excersize, i do salsa two times a week for an hour, and the rest of the days i walk about 45min.
Not alot i know, but i try my best as a single mom with a full time job.

And then we have the people around me, at work, my family, they always have some **** to say about how you look.
How much you weigh, and shopping with family, lets not even go there. I always need the bigger size.
Im always the bigger one everywhere i go.

So yessssssss im pissed of at myself and the world!!!!!!!!!!


Im not doing this **** anymore.
So either I give and accept myself as i am.
Or i eat like i did last year, when i did lose.

Last year eating was: 2-3 slice of bread in the morning and a large dinner. That was it.
And it helped, i lost weight.

So thank you for reading, my hopeless message.
«1

Replies

  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member

    I eat 1200-1500cal a day.
    And yes i do excersize, i do salsa two times a week for an hour, and the rest of the days i walk about 45min.

    how long have you been doing this consistently for?
  • I started about two months ago. Actually its a lifetime sruggle for me.
    And tried everything. I did not do much excersize, now i try to do much more.

    I always eta fresh greens no package stuff and pizza or things like that and i still tried to change things and eat better. I stopped drinking coffee and use less sugar, drink alot of green tea. But nothing helps. I wasnt so strict on the weekends, but i tried to cut down there also, even when i was not overdoing it.

    When you try soooo many things and ways to lose, and you only see the opposite, then whats the use.

    I tried an old pair of jeans this morning and it was to tight around my tummy, that was shocking.

    So i just dont wanna do this anymore. Al of it just hurts tooo frigging much. I cant bear to look at myself. Im soooo disgusted when i see my niece with her nice thin body, and then you have me with my big fat self.
    Im sorry, but this is really the way i feel about myself.

    If i look at last year and this year, even if im eating at my calorie max, im still eating too much.
    So im stopping. just going in my old last year way. That was proof for me.
  • I'm at the same place you are! I have been doing insanity for 2 weeks ..eating super healthy ( 1200 calories per day) and i have not lost a single pound..i know it s not about the weight on the scale but geesh....you would think busting my butt for 2 weeks i would have lost something...dont give up! Change your routine...maybe your body is used to your workouts...confuse your body is what everyone is telling me works...
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    Are you using a food scale for all foods and measuring cups/spoons for free-pouring liquids? Are you logging everything, including oil, condiments, coffee creamer, etc? Do you make sure you're using the most accurate database entries (the ones with no asterisk for whole foods) and using the recipe builder when you cook something to make sure you get an accurate count?
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    I'm at the same place you are! I have been doing insanity for 2 weeks ..eating super healthy ( 1200 calories per day) and i have not lost a single pound..i know it s not about the weight on the scale but geesh....you would think busting my butt for 2 weeks i would have lost something...dont give up! Change your routine...maybe your body is used to your workouts...confuse your body is what everyone is telling me works...

    You don't need to confuse your body. You're likely retaining water because you've just started a new exercise program. Be patient. I had an extra couple of pounds of scale weight for a month when I started lifting.
  • Are you being 100% honest with your logging? Are you weighing and measuring things? I only ask this because this is the EXACT problem I have and I KNOW it's my diet. I go up when I'm not 100% honest about my portion size.

    Also, how often are you weighing yourself? Once a week is plenly. I use to weight every morning and it would literally ruin my whole day if I was up .4lbs fromthe day before. The scale will maky you crazy if you let it.

    Are you eating back all your exercise calories? I may eat some of them back, but I find I do better with weight loss when I don't eat them back or only have a few of them (contrairy to popular belief).

    Don't give up!! You'll get there.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    I started about two months ago. Actually its a lifetime sruggle for me.
    And tried everything. I did not do much excersize, now i try to do much more.

    I always eta fresh greens no package stuff and pizza or things like that and i still tried to change things and eat better. I stopped drinking coffee and use less sugar, drink alot of green tea. But nothing helps. I wasnt so strict on the weekends, but i tried to cut down there also, even when i was not overdoing it.

    When you try soooo many things and ways to lose, and you only see the opposite, then whats the use.

    I tried an old pair of jeans this morning and it was to tight around my tummy, that was shocking.

    So i just dont wanna do this anymore. Al of it just hurts tooo frigging much. I cant bear to look at myself. Im soooo disgusted when i see my niece with her nice thin body, and then you have me with my big fat self.
    Im sorry, but this is really the way i feel about myself.

    If i look at last year and this year, even if im eating at my calorie max, im still eating too much.
    So im stopping. just going in my old last year way. That was proof for me.

    there are two likely culprits.

    1) inaccurate logging
    2) water weight fluctuations

    don't look for instant gratification with weight loss. your results will NEVER be linear. neither will your effort. the long term trend is what matters.

    your logging must be 100% accurate (or as close as possible) in order to diagnose why you "may" be struggling. that's step #1.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    Weigh all of your food, set your calorie goal to a reasonable and maintainable deficit, be consistent, and stop worrying so much about what you eat rather than how much.
  • Don't give up just yet. When i first started i weigh in every two weeks my first two weeks with my fitness pal and exercise i lost three pounds then after that i was only loosing a little over a pound every two weeks. I seen that people (which everybody is different) loosing a pound a week so i look back over my diary and came up with a different plan. Keep in mind that this is a learning process you're finding out what works for your body and what doesn't. So with that being said i made sure first that i logged in everything i ate and i also was eating back my exercise calories which i stopped doing that also and i would leave a couple hundred calories because the food that your putting in your log its give or take a little. After i done this i lost almost 4lbs. my last weigh in. Dont be so easy to give up. Look back over things and try something different thats the only way you will find out what your doing wrong. I hope this helps because your post sounds so depressing.
  • I know, its the only the thing everyday on my mind.
    Eating, food, losing weight, counting and then food again.

    OMG im driving myself crazy, im soo frigging obsessed with this.

    And what bothers me the most, is when im eating somethin at work, the thin people always go:
    Can i have one slice please or half of it :sick: , and then here i am wanting two slices :angry: .

    YESSSSS as all of you are saying the only thing causes this, is that im still eating too much.
    Im probably underestamating my food intake. Which is hard when youre really trying to watch everything you eat.

    Sometimes i look at my food after i logged, and i would think, jeesz i eat too much, but when counting the calories its all between the 1200-1500 cal a day. THEN I JUST GET REALLY CONFUSED.

    Im sorry, im sooooo pissed of today, at MYSELF and everyone and everything.
    WHY IN GODS NAME, AM I BORN THIS WAY??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARRAGAGHAGAHG!!!!!!!!

    Why could i not have the nice shape that my family has. WHy WHy WHy?
    And then my skninny Nieces go, OMG MY SIDES ARE SOOO FAT :sick:
    I just wanna puke right there and then.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member

    If i look at last year and this year, even if im eating at my calorie max, im still eating too much.
    So im stopping. just going in my old last year way. That was proof for me.

    but the problem with that is that it wasnt sustainable... which is why you are back to square one having gained the weight again....

    you need to be consistent, not just for a week or so, but for a significant length of time... if you are eating in a deficit then you WILL lose weight (if you have no medical issues of course). unfortunately rome wasnt built in a day, it may take months or years to get where you want to be... but if you give up you will NEVER get there...
  • GinsTheThing
    GinsTheThing Posts: 6 Member
    You might not want to read the following cos I'm sure you've explored ALL avenues about dropping weight but I do like the 'thrifty metabolism' angle of No.8

    http://impruvism.com/slow-fat-loss/

    Just think there might be one, tiny little change that could switch it all around for you - feel your angst not finding it right now :(
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I know, its the only the thing everyday on my mind.
    Eating, food, losing weight, counting and then food again.

    OMG im driving myself crazy, im soo frigging obsessed with this.

    And what bothers me the most, is when im eating somethin at work, the thin people always go:
    Can i have one slice please or half of it :sick: , and then here i am wanting two slices :angry: .

    YESSSSS as all of you are saying the only thing causes this, is that im still eating too much.
    Im probably underestamating my food intake. Which is hard when youre really trying to watch everything you eat.

    Sometimes i look at my food after i logged, and i would think, jeesz i eat too much, but when counting the calories its all between the 1200-1500 cal a day. THEN I JUST GET REALLY CONFUSED.

    Im sorry, im sooooo pissed of today, at MYSELF and everyone and everything.
    WHY IN GODS NAME, AM I BORN THIS WAY??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARRAGAGHAGAHG!!!!!!!!

    Why could i not have the nice shape that my family has. WHy WHy WHy?
    And then my skninny Nieces go, OMG MY SIDES ARE SOOO FAT :sick:
    I just wanna puke right there and then.

    You think WAY too much about what others think and do...

    you are not your neice or your work colleague who eats half a slice of pizza (really, who does that?!) you are YOU.... work on being the best you that you can be, stop wasting your time wanting to be like someone else...
  • GothyFaery
    GothyFaery Posts: 762 Member
    You might want to talk to your doctor. You could have a thyroid problem. A simple blood test could let you know an it's easy to fix with medication. My husband had a similar problem (he wasn't trying to lose weight though) and he was always tired. Turned out to be a thyroid issue. After a week on the meds, he was 100% better.
  • SpunkiMama
    SpunkiMama Posts: 70 Member
    This could be me typing this out, you are not alone in how you feel. Nor how frustrated you are.

    I too get frustrated and angry at MYSELF for the scale not moving.... the scale will only move if we are being 100% comitted... i have been 75% and well.. my scale lets me know the "truth" about my actions.


    The truth hurts sometimes, so just keep going...keep pushing yourself... giving up on ourselves is the biggest fail of all time. IMO

    would you give up your work performance ? give up your parenting style if it wasnt going your way? Give up paying bills if it got to be to stressful?

    Life is about living, trying, failing, succeeding, making erros, correcting errors, life is a cycle...

    Keep going, keep moving... do not give up!!
  • missylee117
    missylee117 Posts: 66 Member
    If your not losing weight the way you want to you need to see your doctor, they will give you help where you need it, as for swings I lost and gained too, but you have to remember when working out you gain muscle first, fat will come off later, good luck and dont be a quitter.
  • leadiax3
    leadiax3 Posts: 534 Member
    You are really beautiful and you should stopped being upset with yourself. Just eat healthy and when you feel hungry. You already get daily exercise, so you sound healthy. No obsessing! You don't need to obsess.
    I will suggest that you might add muscle tone by trying strength training. The more muscle mass you have the more calories your body burns all day. If you go to you tube there are many at home workouts to try.
  • p4ulmiller
    p4ulmiller Posts: 588 Member
    You might not want to read the following cos I'm sure you've explored ALL avenues about dropping weight but I do like the 'thrifty metabolism' angle of No.8

    http://impruvism.com/slow-fat-loss/

    Just think there might be one, tiny little change that could switch it all around for you - feel your angst not finding it right now :(

    That's a great article. Thanks for linking.
  • Flex382
    Flex382 Posts: 257
    First of all quite looking at the scale everyday.

    First you need to get on a good meal plan before you start cutting.
    Daily
    Protein 1 to 1.5grams per 1lb of bodyweight
    Carbs 1gram per 1lb of bodyweight
    Fat .5grams per 1lb of bodyweight

    After a couple of weeks when you weight platos then keep protein and fats same but drop carbs to .5 grams for 2 to 4 weeks with a high carb day on rest days to jump start your motbalism.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    I know, its the only the thing everyday on my mind.
    Eating, food, losing weight, counting and then food again.

    OMG im driving myself crazy, im soo frigging obsessed with this.

    And what bothers me the most, is when im eating somethin at work, the thin people always go:
    Can i have one slice please or half of it :sick: , and then here i am wanting two slices :angry: .

    YESSSSS as all of you are saying the only thing causes this, is that im still eating too much.
    Im probably underestamating my food intake. Which is hard when youre really trying to watch everything you eat.

    Sometimes i look at my food after i logged, and i would think, jeesz i eat too much, but when counting the calories its all between the 1200-1500 cal a day. THEN I JUST GET REALLY CONFUSED.

    Im sorry, im sooooo pissed of today, at MYSELF and everyone and everything.
    WHY IN GODS NAME, AM I BORN THIS WAY??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARRAGAGHAGAHG!!!!!!!!

    Why could i not have the nice shape that my family has. WHy WHy WHy?
    And then my skninny Nieces go, OMG MY SIDES ARE SOOO FAT :sick:
    I just wanna puke right there and then.

    the bad news is that you're hung up on the sort of mindset that goes along with fad dieters and yo-yo dieters who don't really understand how and why their bodies gain/lose weight.

    the good news is that now that you're here on MFP, you can beat that mindset by finding out how and why your body loses/gains weight and you can break out of that destructive yo-yo dieting pattern (the one where you start a diet, then quit after several weeks, then start again, etc.)

    the reason your brain is working the way it is and making you feel the way it does is because you don't yet know what you need to know about proper, healthy, and sustained weight loss.

    you can start fixing that issue today.

    read these threads. then re-read them. then ask questions. i think ti will help put your mind at ease.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/833026-important-posts-to-read
  • I know i should pay less attention to what people do and say, but honestly.
    Im frigging surrounded by people like that all day long.

    Even my mom, for example.
    My son would be wresteling with her, and she would say " go wrestle with mommy, cause she has more meat on her"
    :sick:

    Even my son, he is almost 4. We were playing a game with my family about big and small.
    So my nice went: i am .... and he said Small, and she went MOMMY IS...... and he said BIG:sad:
    I wanted to die.

    And yes i agree, i should just eat less, cause i dont think im doing it the right way.
    Thats what hurts, when youre convinced after reading and reading everything about weightloss and trying so hard,
    changing so much, JUST TO DISCOVER that youre still doing it wrong :sad:

    And i know, last year eating alot less helped me more, instead of trying to eat to meet my calorie max.
    What the hell am i doing :grumble:
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    First of all quite looking at the scale everyday.

    First you need to get on a good meal plan before you start cutting.
    Daily
    Protein 1 to 1.5grams per 1lb of bodyweight
    Carbs 1gram per 1lb of bodyweight
    Fat .5grams per 1lb of bodyweight

    After a couple of weeks when you weight platos then keep protein and fats same but drop carbs to .5 grams for 2 to 4 weeks with a high carb day on rest days to jump start your motbalism.

    OP, don't listen to this advice (above). it's not correct for you.

    protein should be 1.0g/lb of LBM (lean body mass), not bodyweight.
    fats should be 0.35g/lb of bodyweight.
    carbs are irrelevant.

    however, that's info about macronutrients.

    your problem right now is weight loss and that's solely about calories in and calories out.
  • LKuderna
    LKuderna Posts: 31 Member
    I hope I can encourage you!! I am 59, so that brings its own set of issues, but I just wanted to say, I don't think I've lost any weight either but I think MFP is really helping me. I started exercising a lot more at the same time I started MFP, and my calories were way too low at first. Now I eat more and still try to stay within my goal. I learned from reading the blogs and listening to knowledgeable people that when you really start to get fit, you can add muscle and retain water (normal for this). So I have kept my calories the same, kept on logging my food and exercise, and I still think it helps, I actually appear to be more trim. My boss (who is a PA) even told me I might gain some weight and not to stress about it. If you would like to friend me on this site, feel free! :smile:
  • Thank you all for reading, and your great advise :flowerforyou:
    I will give this another try, but different.
  • I Agree, there are amazing people here at MFP.
    The reason im still not giving up although im on the edge somtimes, are the succes stories.
    Everytime i read a post, i look at the persons ticker, that gives me hope.
  • debralekicsummers
    debralekicsummers Posts: 56 Member
    I know how you are feeling , i suffer from Pcos and Insulin resistance. I have lost weight and still have a way to go , i have been stuck at the same weight for a few months, i have stepped up my workouts , tried eating really carefully , i think i am doing great and then get onto the scale and it is the same or it goes up 1kg then next week i am down 1kg again and so it goes. This sometimes leads me to binges and feeling horrible but every time i get back up, dust myself off and know that if i keep trying i will succeed and every time i fail i become more determined to beat this. I came across an amazing book and it really is enlightening, read it , i will post the link for a pdf format . i including a few bits out the book. Put the scale away, make other goals for yourself, fitness wise, like to run a race or try something new. etc don't just concentrate on the weight part of it but how you feel when you are working out and eating right. Also take a look into calorie and carb cycling, it is pretty effective . It wouldn't be a bad idea to go for some blood tests and make sure you don't have any hormone or thyroid problems. But most of all don't give up!!!!!!!!! and when you fall down get back up, because everyone falls down and it is not easy. But believe in yourself !
    So here are some snippets from the book, enjoy! The full version is http://www.dalemcnelly.com/The Slight Edge.pdf

    The most powerful force for change is time.

    That most valuable gift of all is a gift that you
    always have. You always have a choice.

    The important point is to start on the path and to
    remember that no matter what has gone on before,
    you can begin fresh and new and at any time you can
    choose to start with a clean slate.

    Greatness is always in the moment of
    the decision.

    No success is immediate. Nor is any failure
    instantaneous.

    The secret is to change the way you
    think. Once you do, then you will take the steps you need to take, to lead you to
    the how-to’s you need. If you don’t change your thinking, no amount of how-to’s
    will offer a real solution. It’s not the “hows,” it’s how you do the “hows.”
    This isn’t about self-hypnosis, or about conjuring up the impossible through
    sheer positive thinking, or any other kind of hocus-pocus. And I’m not talking
    about some complex, elaborate or heady system of ideas. And—although I’ll
    completely understand if you find the last part of this sentence truly difficult to
    believe—what I’m talking about is not difficult to do.
    It simply means changing your thinking. Your philosophy.
    The reason diets and other how-to’s don’t work for most people is the same
    reason most how-to books and courses don’t work for most people. It isn’t
    that the actions are wrong. It’s that people don’t keep
    doing them.
    A positive philosophy turns into a positive attitude, which turns into
    positive actions, which turn into positive results, which turn into a positive
    lifestyle.

    Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you
    just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will
    come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up.
    — Anne Lamott
    There is one quality which one must possess to win,
    and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of
    what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it.
    — Napoleon Hill

    “You
    want a miracle? Be the miracle.”
  • jensiegel39
    jensiegel39 Posts: 163 Member
    I feel your pain, and I totally understand. At first, I was up and down the same three pounds, for like two weeks. Then, I lost a little, then one week, I was up and down with one pound, then I lost a little. Now, I've lost a solid 10 lbs, but I'm at the gym every day and always a little under my calories and measuring everything. It's damn hard work, but if you give up or go to this unhealthy meal-skipping thing, you'll be in the same miserable boat you are now. You have to find what works for you. Maybe more calories. Maybe less. Also, is it your time of the month? That could affect the scale, of course. I would take some time to experiment with different foods and exercise amounts and types before giving up.

    And also, please lean on your people on MFP. I find mine really help and encourage me. Good luck to you!
  • HollisGrant
    HollisGrant Posts: 2,022 Member
    You might tell other adults they are hurting your feelings and you would appreciate their support or to keep their comments to themselves.

    People lose weight by how many calories they eat versus how much they burn. You're probably eating more than you think or overestimating how much you're burning through exercise, or you might have a medical problem.

    Some suggestions:

    Drink water. It fills you up and curbs your hunger.

    Protein curbs hunger. Drink a protein shake if you aren't sure what to eat.

    I try to eat simple nutritious foods that I know I will be eating long term -- not foods I am punishing myself with until my weight is where I want. I also look for foods with fiber like steamed kale, collards and spinach, and steel cut oats with sliced apple.

    I try to stay away from processed food. It isn't necessary to stay away from processed food for weight loss -- lots of successful people have lost 100 pounds or more eating ice cream and potato chips every single day -- but I can't eat that stuff very often. Once I start, I can't stop eating it and crave it for days.

    I don't eat my exercise calories back unless I'm hungry, or I eat some of them back but not all. I don't own any devices and am not sure what I'm really burning or eating. I have been told by MFP friends with heart rate monitors that the exercise numbers in the MFP database are often too high.

    Be patient. There's a saying that you didn't gain the weight in a day so it isn't going to come off in a day. Figure out what you're going to eat, ask your loved ones for support, be positive, and work in exercise where you can - walk instead of using the car, that kind of thing.

    You can do this just like thousands of other people! Better to get the weight off now rather than years from now when you've gained even more.
  • I started exercising like in august was 85 Kg after a 20 years OF INACTIVITY I am now 72Kg and exercise 700 to 1000Kcal a day. needless to say I feel so much better.

    Started rowing just to restart cardio then cycling 8kms a day then 15 and now 20. I don't really look at what I am eating i just joined this site today to get some idea at my food intake and comprehend the process on my journey to fitness.
    I got myself a Suunto watch with gps pod +Hr monitor and track exercise through Movescount.
    http://www.movescount.com/members/jeromeberthier

    Things I noticed:
    -Weight loss has an inertia at the start
    -Exercise is important so you preserve muscle and shed more fat
    -There will be times where you binge a little and you loose a week of results, so what ?:frown:
    -Don't snack or just eat a fruit (they good for you )
    -Exercise has 0 influence on appetite
    -Don't have losing weight as a goal but rather fitness and better health, weight loss will be a consequence of that
    Tips
    -take up a sport you can do everyday go easy at start till fitness is reasonable
    -increase length, and intensity as u get fitter
    -stick to your exercise routine no excuses for not doing it

    That's about it can't fail
  • rb16fitness
    rb16fitness Posts: 236 Member
    Stop beating yourself up. It's self defeating and resolves nothing.

    Start afresh and take one day, or one meal if necessary at, a time. Stop focusing on the total amount you need to lose. You didn't gain this weight overnight it will take consistent diligent changes to achieve your goals.

    If you give up, you're choosing to stay as you are.
    If you choose to starve yourself in an attempt to get thin you're setting yourself up for failure.

    Sensible daily deficit is the key and your body will use up its fat reserves.
    Good luck.