Hello All,

I'm embarrassed to say that I weigh more than 260 pounds. I started to say that "I am more than 260" but realized that my weight shouldn't define me and that it is just a part of me that can change. I'm scared for my health, I'm embarrassed to meet new people...

I struggle every day with major depression, dysthymic disorder, and PTSD (and the extreme anxiety that goes with it). That alone is a struggle but I'm learning to make some goals and with these goals, I will need to be physically healthier.

My biggest problem is taking baby steps. I need to make one small change at a time or nothing will change. It will become too overwhelming. Does anyone else have problems with this?


  • flywithgeorge
    flywithgeorge Posts: 62 Member
    Good morning... and YES, I can totally relate! Sorry to be insensitive but in my case, I knew I had let my weight get out of control, thinking I was about 230 or 240 lbs, only to find out that I was 280. But here's the kicker... to maintain that weight, I was consuming (and not accounting for of course) at least 4000-5000 calories per day or more. You've already taken the first step (and the hardest).. join this site... great decision too! Next, start accounting for everything you eat on a daily basis and if you're like me, you'll be amazed on ways to cut down. I lost a bunch of weight before I joined MFP but now that I'm a member, I easily maintain 1200-1300 calories per day with some exercise. You're absolutely right though... small steps... cut calories and a simple exercise routine to start, even some walking. I like to always use as many muscle groups as possible so if I'm walking, I'm swinging my arms up and back... just my two cents. Good luck in your journey!
  • You're taking the hardest first steps to change yourself, that's nothing to be ashamed of. I was 275 and lost 33 lbs. It wasn't much but it was the best I've ever felt physically. I've backslid a bit but I'm back on the right track now, and if you need a friend on here you can always come to me. It may help that we're around the same starting weight so you know I understand your woe. It's okay to be embarrassed, you're human.

    Baby steps are better than no steps at all. :) I'll be sending you a friend request.
  • DeniseBarone
    DeniseBarone Posts: 80 Member
    Yes, it's really hard, but you'll do it.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    You came to the right place and you CAN do this.

    I recommend starting with the most modest of deficits until you get your bearings. Set your lifestyle factor to "sedentary" but your goal to losing only half a pound weekly. Start logging. Don't worry about anything other than hitting the calorie target it gives you.

    Eventually, as you learn to adjust your diet, you can make your goal more aggressive, but diving in with both feet to try and change everything all at once isn't going to help you form new habits that will last a lifetime.

    Browse the success stories here. You'll find many inspiring stories. One day, yours can be right up there with the rest of them.
  • jigsaw_me
    jigsaw_me Posts: 616 Member
    Welcome. I think baby steps is the best way to do it.

    Choose one thing to change - maybe just track your food for a week and then think about changing what you eat. Or maybe it's just walking to the front gate once a day ...

    Once that becomes part of your regular routine choose something else and work on changing that.

    Feel free to send me a friend request if you want.
  • Hi,

    Yes, baby steps is the way to go - or so I've been told. I've recently started, just like you, and have concentrated on getting my daily calorie intake right around what's recommended. I haven't switched to "healthy" foods to do this, though. Not yet. I intend to, but I don't want to overwhelm myself with all the changes all at once. I've done that before and not been successful. I also am using the baby steps routine with my exercise. Right now I do a Biggest Loser workout DVD (I have a lot of them!) every other day. The workouts are approximately 25-30 minutes long. My goal is to eventually exercise every day.

    I would be happy to be part of your support system as we have about the same amount to lose.
  • Sedna_51
    Sedna_51 Posts: 277 Member
    First of all: congratulations. You're making a change right now by looking into this website. I have a number of chronic diseases that make getting healthier harder, and like you, I've been most successful by doing things one tiny step at a time. I started by just deciding to write down everything I ate. No calorie goal, nothing like that- just writing down all I ate. Six months later, I'm working my way towards exercising multiple times a week and eating five fruits and veggies every day. I haven't lost a lot of weight, but I have built some enduring habits that will keep me healthier in the long run, no matter what I weigh.

    This is hard. It's changing some major ingrained habits, and that's hard to do! It takes a lot of time and patience and resources, and the only way I've found to be successful at it is to be persistent but gentle with myself.
  • catholiclorimom
    catholiclorimom Posts: 15 Member
    yes, I too have a problem with taking baby steps, but I have learned that when I take on too much I "crash and burn". Of course, that backfires bigtime! With your major issues you are probably getting extra help. These people can guide you in establishing small manageable goals a bit at a time. I wrote these goals down (no more than three), posted them on the fridge, and talked to a friend daily for accountability. I was amazed how quickly I would "forget" my goals, tried to weasel out of them, or put them off, but daily accountability helped me get back on track. Each new habit took over a month to establish, but the beautiful thing is that once a goal becomes a habit the mental struggle is pretty much over and you just automatically make the better choices. You will feel better and that helps motivation. Giving up is not an option! Carpe diem :)
  • Livin4me1969
    Livin4me1969 Posts: 745 Member
    You are making the right steps towards a healthier you. I know before MFP everytime I started a "diet" and did not see immediate results I just quit. I have come to realize that this is not a diet this is life and I have to make changes to assure that I not only lose the weight but am able to keep it off. The first thing I did was to give up soda. I lost 20 pounds in about 2.5 months just doing that. I started at 306 pounds and when I saw that on the scale i just wanted to cry but I didnt. I am changing the way I look at food. It is meant to be fuel and not comfort so I have to remind myself everyday that is it not my friend. You just have to continue to push through and even if you fall off the wagon then you have to start again...Do not let a mistake or a bad day ruin it for you. Start with cutting back soda and eating out and you will be amazed at how much that helps. Just be honest with yourself when you are logging and you will see the changes. Good Luck and I will send you a friend request and we can help each other on this journey :smile:
  • themedalist
    themedalist Posts: 3,201 Member
    One of my MFP friends centered her whole weight loss program around baby steps and you know what happened to her? She lost 174 pounds! You can do this!
  • shafa4321
    shafa4321 Posts: 132 Member
    Be ready not for sucess but frequent falls and failure but Sarting over and OVER . thats key ,Not interest or passion Just commitment .
  • Depression and anxiety aren't tied to weight- they are tied to self esteem. Losing weight isn't a guarantee to increase your self-esteem, it's been an issue for me at my largest size and at my smallest,

    What will help you is feeling empowered and in control, and that is something that you can acheive by feeling more in control of your food and your weight.
  • goalss4nika
    goalss4nika Posts: 529 Member
    Well, Welcome back Good job for coming back and making the brave decision to get this weight under control. Feel free to add me. I have a long way to go, but I will get there. And I will support you along the way