Have a special dinner to go to, how do I NOT feel guilty??

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nattyann2245
nattyann2245 Posts: 10 Member
in Motivation and Support
So my boyfriend and I are wanting to go out for a special Christmas dinner. (I currently live overseas for school and am only home for a few days for the holidays). We have a special restaurant that we go to on very special occasions, and of course it is not diet friendly. There is not a "good" thing to eat on the menu. I want to go out and enjoy our special dinner but know that I am going to have that awful regret afterwards, even after picking the healthiest choices I can. I am just trying to maintain my weight and am always worried about slowly gaining weight, one "special dinner" or "harmless" dessert at a time.

Any suggestions on how to deal with that awful guilt, while not alienating myself from the joys of a nice meal??
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Replies

  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    you have a few options.

    find a different restaurant

    or

    enjoy yourself. it's just one meal. after all, if you fail one test, will you no longer get your degree?
  • Ang108
    Ang108 Posts: 1,711 Member
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    The easiest option: just don't feel guilty.....
  • RicaJamie
    RicaJamie Posts: 46
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    Order what you want, immediately cut it in half, and only eat one half? I do this often now and find I can still go out to eat and enjoy! My hubby (or whomever I go out with) and I often share dinner now too! We save money AND eat less. It's a win win!
  • editorgrrl
    editorgrrl Posts: 7,060 Member
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    There are no "good" or "bad" foods. Look at your nutrition for the past 7 days; don't obsess about just one day that's over goal.

    Black & white thinking is unhealthy. You lost the weight by eating at a deficit most of the time, and you will maintain by eating at TDEE most of the time.

    PS. Maybe you & your BF could do something active to "earn" you some extra calories?
  • FunnyFit
    FunnyFit Posts: 46 Member
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    Do what the others have suggested and/or feel free to copy a link to the menu for us to help you select some wiser choices...although it sounds like you have already thought of that. Also, many restaurants will make whatever you want and however you want it and I usually just tip really well afterwards for accommodating me :) Have a wonderful time!!!
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
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    Almost all restaurants will accommodate special requests (broiled fish instead of fried, hold the butter, etc). They will steam vegetables, etc.

    One thing you can do is decide where you want to spend your calories. If you love dessert, you may want to forego soft drinks or alcohol. If having a glass of wine is important, have that, but skip the pre-meal bread or appetizers.

    You can do it!
  • sloth3toes
    sloth3toes Posts: 2,212 Member
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    you have a few options.

    find a different restaurant

    or

    enjoy yourself. it's just one meal. after all, if you fail one test, will you no longer get your degree?

    This ^^^^^

    I just saw the same thing posted in another thread, maybe yesterday.... I think it was Capt_Apollo, there too.... This your new catch phrase Capt_Apollo :bigsmile:

    The thing is, you say you are maintaining. You have to learn to live your life, including a nice restaurant meal, now and again... maybe dinner at friends.... without being so neurotic that you can't enjoy yourself. If you're still logging, log what you eat, if you go over, eat at a slight deficit for a few days to compensate... or do a bit more cardio....

    The point is.... it's only one meal. If we're all so tightly wound that we can't enjoy one "special dinner" or "harmless" dessert occasionally, then our problems extend way beyond our weight.

    I ate it, I logged it, I moved on.
  • east2west14
    east2west14 Posts: 161 Member
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    Enjoy it but don't over indulge, drink water before and after dinner. You will be fine :)

    Sorry I forgot to add that you should probably not arrive at the restaurant very hungry because then you'll eat a lot that's a trick I learned last Thanksgiving
  • Mangopickle
    Mangopickle Posts: 1,509 Member
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    Focus on him not the food. Eat slowly and deliberately. Enjoy it ,log it and move on.
  • acpgee
    acpgee Posts: 7,657 Member
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    Just do a big cardio workout beforehand and enjoy the splurge. I do this all the time to accomodate restaurant meals and dinner parties. A vigorous hour on the elliptical gives me an extra 500 calories if I am to believe my HRM. An hour of walking should be around 300 calories.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    Log the calories, then work out a little extra and eat a bit less the next several days.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    http://body-improvements.com/2013/05/24/undiet-your-diet/
  • MommaChocoLatte
    MommaChocoLatte Posts: 389 Member
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    Order what you want, immediately cut it in half, and only eat one half? I do this often now and find I can still go out to eat and enjoy!

    This is what I do. I order what I want and I immediately ask for a box and box up half the meal. I also order a side salad if the meal doesnt come with one. Everyone wins :)
  • littleburgy
    littleburgy Posts: 570 Member
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    See the forest for the trees and take it in the perspective of the week, month, year....

    You will see in the grand scheme of things, it isn't a big deal. Sometimes life has those special moments that are just meant to be enjoyed.

    I also live overseas, had some good foods back home around Thanksgiving that I missed so much and impeded my progress to the point where I only maintained this month, but I regret nothing. I wouldn't trade those great times with family for a pound or whatever it was I gained. I eventually lost it back from staying course and getting back into routine anyway.
  • Sherbog
    Sherbog Posts: 1,072 Member
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    Double or triple your exercise the day before and the day after. It's all a math game. Go light on calorie intake the day before ad the day after. Your body does not know your math game.

    Shirley in Oregon headed for Denver.
  • Sherbog
    Sherbog Posts: 1,072 Member
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    You just joined MFP this month. My suggestion would be to go read previous posts. Great info!
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,161 Member
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    The time you spend together is far more important that "eating healthy". Enjoy your meal together and get back to your calories the next day. Feeling regrets for spending a meal with those you love is bordering on being obsessive about your diet, not to mention what it says about which you value more, that one meal with the one you love or your diet. You did not become fat because of one meal. It was a whole way of eating every day.
  • Fenrissa
    Fenrissa Posts: 116
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    The time you spend together is far more important that "eating healthy". Enjoy your meal together and get back to your calories the next day. Feeling regrets for spending a meal with those you love is bordering on being obsessive about your diet, not to mention what it says about which you value more, that one meal with the one you love or your diet. You did not become fat because of one meal. It was a whole way of eating every day.
  • Adc7225
    Adc7225 Posts: 1,318 Member
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    I agree with Mangopickle, go, enjoy yourself, eat slow and only until you are full. While here on MFP we focus on the day to day, sometimes we may need to balance out a few days at a time or even by the week :smile:
  • lisabinco
    lisabinco Posts: 1,016 Member
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    Focus on him not the food. Eat slowly and deliberately. Enjoy it ,log it and move on.
    ^^This^^
    If I can, ahead of time, I cut back calories (or salt in my case), the day before or the day of the dinner. I eat before I go, so I'm not hungry when I get there. I focus on the person I'm with and the conversation, not the food. I order as healthy as I can, and will sometimes ask for modifications to the food which most restaurants will do. I stop before I'm stuffed, and take the rest home (or leave it there). I log it as best I can. Then tomorrow is a new day.

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