How can I lose 80 pounds in two months?

Don't go there! Be healthy in your methods to lose weight.
You sound desperate and I feel so sorry for you! Check other posts for better ways. And tough as it is currently, be honest with yourself as well as with your boyfriend. Love yourself first!

:huh:
Not sure if serious.

I think 30 pounds would be the max someone that is very overweight could potentially lose in two months and even that may not be possible. But, sometimes there can be an initial loss of water weight. Do this in a healthy way, so that you will be healthy when you meet your boyfriend. He knows you are overweight and hopefully you told him how much. 20 or so pounds is a good loss. So, start now and you will be happy, energetic, and hopeful in two months from now. Instead of physically sick, mentally unwell, hospitalized and probably falling off the wagon and gaining back more than you lost.

Did you tell your long-distance boyfriend you were 80 pounds lighter than you are? If so, I think that's probably just as unhealthy for your relationship as losing 80 pounds in two months would be for your body.

Eat sensibly, workout, confess to your boyfriend, and be determined to be a healthier you.

No he knows I'm overweight and he says he doesn't care but I just feel its very unsexy to have him touch me and feel rolls and its making freak out and have panic attacks just thinking of him rejecting me

I guess I'm unsure why you think a man you have never met will be touching you at all? Also unsure why said man gets to have the title of your boyfriend without ever laying eyes? Have you considered the possibility that he may be hideous and you are stressing out for nothing?

If it were me I'd operate on this assumption, take it easy losing whatever lbs come off in 2 months probably like 20 or so, and shopping for cute but sexy chastity belts to wear while he's here.

If the guy knows you are overweight but rejects you after he sees you, he wasn't worth the desperation you are feeling.

Even if you only lose 20 pounds in 2 months, that's a great start. Eat sensibly, exercise a bit and just keep at it. Desperation is no reason to put your health at risk....and neither is a guy you have never met.

I suppose you could cut off your legs... but no yeah that's a terrible idea. Decide to be healthy for yourself the right way. Read the success forums to see how people really did it.

Doctor Weird on the Aqua Teen Hunger Forces lost a lot of weight by cutting off his legs. I almost died laughing.

I don't believe for a second that your friend lost over 100 pounds in two month. It's not possible.
Even people living in refugee camps in Africa and eating less than 500 calories a day lose a lot less than that.
I get upset when people here say things like " Let's assume you could sustain such a diet....." it's not sustainable, unless something is mentally wrong with you....for normal healthy people this is not a diet that can be maintained for more than a few days, because no one is supposed to eat like this.....
Even if you eat nothing for two month and only drink water you will NOT lose 80 pounds.....just get real, work out a doable plan with a healthy deficit and be patient.

I call SHENANIGANS on the 100lbs in 2 months.

I know it sounds really insane but my friend lost over 100 pounds in the same amount of time. He told me to eat oatmeal for breakfast, an apple for lunch, and spinach for dinner and then to work out for about 5 hours a day. Will this work? My long distance boyfriend is coming in march and I really want to look good for him as its our first time meeting in person and I feel all this pressure (not from him but from myself) to be in good shape.

If this is serious, then I want to say that your friend really isn't giving you good advice. He's essentially promoting disordered eating and exercise anorexia. I'd stop listening to your friends and go seek help from a registered dietitian.

And even if you were able to do this (which you won't), you'd end up losing a lot of muscle and probably not as many inches/sizes as you might have if you'd taken it slow. Not to mention at that rate of loss, you are definitely guaranteed to have a lot of loose skin flapping around. A lot.

I know it sounds really insane but my friend lost over 100 pounds in the same amount of time. He told me to eat oatmeal for breakfast, an apple for lunch, and spinach for dinner and then to work out for about 5 hours a day. Will this work? My long distance boyfriend is coming in march and I really want to look good for him as its our first time meeting in person and I feel all this pressure (not from him but from myself) to be in good shape.

Not safe due to nutritional deficit. Maybe try a balanced variation of what your friend suggested and you'll still lose a tonne of weight. Oh and the calorie deficit! Dude... *tugs at collar* no.

I know it sounds really insane but my friend lost over 100 pounds in the same amount of time. He told me to eat oatmeal for breakfast, an apple for lunch, and spinach for dinner and then to work out for about 5 hours a day. Will this work? My long distance boyfriend is coming in march and I really want to look good for him as its our first time meeting in person and I feel all this pressure (not from him but from myself) to be in good shape.

If this is serious, then I want to say that your friend really isn't giving you good advice. He's essentially promoting disordered eating and exercise anorexia. I'd stop listening to your friends and go seek help from a registered dietitian.

And even if you were able to do this (which you won't), you'd end up losing a lot of muscle and probably not as many inches/sizes as you might have if you'd taken it slow. Not to mention at that rate of loss, you are definitely guaranteed to have a lot of loose skin flapping around. A lot.

that sounds even worse than feeling a bunch of rolls, huh?

By cutting off a limb!

Before you try something so drastic, read this:

Rapid and/or major weight loss damages the heart by decreasing myocardial fiber size. Lack ofprotein, electrolytes, and micronutrients may contribute to the myofibrillar damage.

http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/56/1/230S.full.pdf


This study examines the deaths of 17 people who were doing extreme low calorie diets. Heart issues were to blame. The subjects reported feeling well and they were happy with their progress.

http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/34/4/453.full.pdf

This one is the famed Minnesota Starvation experiment. Pay close attention to what happened to the mental health of these formerly psychologically healthy young men:

Indeed, most of the subjects experienced periods of severe emotional distress and depression.[1]:161 There were extreme reactions to the psychological effects during the experiment including self-mutilation (one subject amputated three fingers of his hand with an axe, though the subject was unsure if he had done so intentionally or accidentally).[5] Participants exhibited a preoccupation with food, both during the starvation period and the rehabilitation phase. Sexual interest was drastically reduced, and the volunteers showed signs of social withdrawal and isolation.[1]:123-124 The participants reported a decline in concentration, comprehension and judgment capabilities

http://jn.nutrition.org/content/135/6/1347.full
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnesota_Starvation_Experiment


If you still want to proceed, discuss the best method with your doctor and get a referral to a registered dietician.

I think the fastest time on the Biggest Loser to reach 100 lb loss is 8 weeks, so technically it IS possible for a man to lose that much, if he is like over 500 lbs. That is a 20% reduction. A 2% reduction per week is a doable goal if one is strictly adhering to their diet and working out consistently.

That said, most of the people who lose insane amounts of weight that quickly on the show, and in real life, usually gain the weight back fairly quickly as well.

However, a 5'0" female trying to lose 10 lbs per week for 8 weeks straight, is not very likely. You might could do it for a couple of weeks, but after the initial water weight, your loss will slow. Perhaps you could pull off 40-50 in that time, but you would have to work hard to get there. If an internet boyfriend is enough motivation for you to get started on a healthier lifestyle, then great. Go for it. But what happens after he leaves. Will you continue to lose? What if he is a real jerk and breaks your heart? Will you binge to soothe your broken heart?

You need to find some long term motivation to get your body healthier for YOU. Not some guy you met on the internet.
Now is the perfect age for you to make some life long changes. But do it in a healthy manner. Best wishes for you! You CAN get healthier!