Lost tons! Got married! Bought a house. Gained back weight!

kendraleigh88
kendraleigh88 Posts: 77
in Motivation and Support
I've read so many stories about this happening to people and I used to think that it would never happen to me.
Of course, I was wrong..and it's completely my fault. Boo!

So, here is my story:
In January of 2012, I got engaged. Woohoo! I was super happy and thrilled to be getting married. I was smoking then as well.
I started watching wedding shows and seeing all the brides in small dresses looking fabulous and thought, "hey, I should probably look like them, too" Wasn't planning a lifestyle change at the time, just looking to lose weight (BAD. BAD. BAAAD) Now I sort of know what I did wrong. Anyway, I was 260 and am 5'8". So, I started a bit of walking and downloaded this wonderful app to track my calories. I went down to 1600 which was quite a struggle. I never quite got used to that. I found that walking made me want to quit smoking so eventually I did that as well which was huge for me as I was a heavy smoker. Then I stumbled on 30DS. Did that along with walking and some eclipse workouts. After about 8 months, I had lost somewhere from 55-60 lbs. Bought my beautiful wedding dress and got married.

Shortly after the wedding, I started working lots of overtime to save up for buying a new house and my health just started slipping. It wasn't a priority anymore. Working lots, making money and buying a house was all I cared about. Long hours at work, not preparing food and actual lack of cooking skills meant disaster for me. I started smoking from stress again, too.

Anyway, in September we bought our home. I gained back 18 lbs since the wedding and figured I'd get back into working out and watching what I ate when we settled into our new home.

Well, I'm settled. Still working lots and LOTS. Lost all motivation, got down on myself, can't fit into anything anymore. I've gained back 35 lbs and I'm mortified.

Anyway, read some great success stories on here and some motivation threads and thinking that motivation is coming back. My husband, who is healthy and lifts weights, is a great support and really wants to help me with a lifestyle change. We will work out at home together and all that jazz.

Has anyone had this happen to them? I'm sure someone has. I want to hear how you turned your life around!

Replies

  • lisabinco
    lisabinco Posts: 1,016 Member
    Ha! Some of us are slow learners and have done this more than once.
    I've lost the same 50-60 pounds at least 3 times in my life. Gained it all back. Frustrating. I'd get so mad at myself each time.
    But here's what I didn't do those other times: I didn't make a lifestyle change. I just dieted and exercised till I got back to my best weight, and then slowly fell back into my old habits while I worked too many hours, stressed about marrying/divorcing/marrying, stressed about work, stressed about a new house, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. A lot of us, like me, forget to take care of ourselves first. We forget how important our health is to us. We think "I'll take care of myself tomorrow" and tomorrow never comes. We forget to make ourselves important to ourselves.
    I've gotten very selfish about making time for myself. I just have to do it. Otherwise I will find myself fat again.
    This time I have made a complete lifestyle change in a lot of areas. I've learned to let go of stressful stuff better. I've learned to cook better, thus to eat better. I've made a commitment to myself to take care of myself first.
    My favorite saying to remind myself of this: "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."
  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
    Getting married is overrated isn't it?
  • kendraleigh88
    kendraleigh88 Posts: 77
    I like the sounds of becoming selfish about making time for myself. I feel like I could likely REALLY benefit from it. I shall begin doing so very soon:) Thank you!

    Haha, getting married was great and I'm thrilled! Just not about the post-flub I've put on. Apparently it's so incredibly common!
  • darcy1982
    darcy1982 Posts: 52 Member
    I know what you mean and how you feel..i dropped almost 40 lbs for my wedding and started saving for a house and in that time, my MIL lost her life in a car accident, we really crushed and I tried to help my husband (very close to his mom) and FIL threw everything. I had to be strong and didnt think of myself during that time..fast forward to now...everyone is doing better but its still hard and i just let myself go with eating like I won't gain weight!! Its hard sometimes when life gets in the way! But just get back on that horse and keep riding...you will soon find that motivation and inspiration to get back to where you want to be!
  • lisabinco
    lisabinco Posts: 1,016 Member
    I have a BIL who is religious about going for a run, no matter what, no matter where, every day. Hubby thinks it's selfish to come visit us, for instance, and at some point off goes BIL for his daily run, never mind what else is going on. One time we were at an airport waiting for a delayed flight, and BIL puts on his running shoes and shorts from his backpack, and headed off for a run around the terminal. I've grown to admire that kind of person, who is determined to make time for himself and his health. I had both a male and female boss who did the same thing. Every day, no matter what ridiculousness was going on at the office, they would make time to go play basketball or run or walk. It's a commitment to yourself and your health, and I admire that. I'm trying to emulate that these days for myself.
  • Indiri13
    Indiri13 Posts: 104 Member
    You are in very similar company here. I was 240 after my 3rd child and dropped down to 160 that year. Then I gained 50 back over several years. In December 2011, at 210, I decided to get it under control again and dropped to 155. In May of this year my life took a stressful turn and I hit 180. It's still far from my peak so I guess that's something but here I am dropping it again. I'm back under 170 and shooting for 150-155. I'm glad that I decided to take control sooner and each time my high is a little lower so I have hope that I'm getting better at this.
  • kellygirl5538
    kellygirl5538 Posts: 597 Member
    sooo easy to gain back for sure! You know what works go back to it!
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    I like the sounds of becoming selfish about making time for myself. I feel like I could likely REALLY benefit from it. I shall begin doing so very soon:) Thank you!

    No. You HAVE to be selfish, and you MUST make time for yourself. This is non-negotiable. You also must make time for you and the hubby, but I digress. If you don't take care of yourself, then you can't take care of anything else.

    I go to the gym @ 630am so it doesn't cut into my family or hubby time. And I hatehatehate mornings. You make it work. :flowerforyou:
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    I can sort of relate.

    When I was a teenager (I'm also 5'8" btw) I slowly climbed from 180 (at age 14) up to 240-something as a freshman college, without even realizing I'd put on 60 lb over just a few years. Then I had a spider bite and had to be sedentary whilst on steroids, followed with a bad breakup...wound up at 299 lb. My senior year of college I started a walking program and ate very very little (like unhealthy low calorie of well under 1,000 but I did not realize that at all, I thought that was what eating light & healthy meant) and I got down to 227. Although at that time I looked really bad and gaunt, even at 227. I'm sure it was due to losing too quickly and with the wrong methods. I didn't have an ED or bulimia-type behaviors, or anything but I would drink a bunch of Diet Pepsi and eat like one Chick-Fil-A sandwich for the entire DAY or some steamed rice with baby carrots and a dollop of margarine (for some reason). I'd imagine some days were probably around 500 calories. Eeek!

    Anyway...I was so happy and proud to have lost 72 lb. But then I met my ex husband and he was obese and loved to dine out, and we weren't all that romantic/lovey and I was somewhat depressed and just did not feel there was any big benefit to staying at what was for me a low weight. So slowly I just started eating more and not caring. For most of my 20's and into my early 30's I weighed between 260-270 at all times and I was ok with that weight. I had a lot of energy, I felt that I looked okay in my size 20-22 clothes, and when I went to the doctor they said things were fine with my health, cholesterol, etc...I was surprisingly not pre-diabetic, etc...but of course they suggested I lose about 30 lb. I ignored that.

    Then, in 2008 I had a new job that was much more stressful and "important" than any of my previous jobs. I was also making a lot more money. My ex husband was making good money too. We bought a house, which was within our budget easily...but I kept listening to the bad economic news 24/7 and worried that we were gonna be doomed, lose our jobs, house, etc. I was a basket case. The ex and I hated our jobs, and were stressed out all of the time and our #1 way to deal with that was FOOD. Dining out at least once a day. More on weekends. Grabbing Starbucks or fast food just for a snack on the way home from work was a very normal thing for me during that time. Suddenly I found myself at 307 lb around my 32nd birthday, and for the first time in my entire (mostly obese) life, I was having little issues happening like swollen ankles and shortness of breath, YIKES. I knew something had to change! I was so ashamed that I'd gained SO much weight in a relatively short time. I was 263 lb in Sept 2007 and 307 lb in Nov 2008 :-(

    Anyway I lost 45 lb over a 4 year period by exercising more, eating out less, etc. And since then I've found MFP and lost 58 lb since March 2013. So now I'm at 204 lb and the smallest I have been since my teens.

    You lost the weight once, you can do it again!!
  • JTick
    JTick Posts: 2,131 Member
    I've lost and gained weight more times than I can remember. I woke up one morning in August 2013, and was DONE. I can't describe that feeling, but 511 days later, I haven't missed a day of logging in and trying. During that time, I've not once had to reset my ticker or gained any weight outside of normal fluctuations.

    When you want this, and are truly ready, I believe it falls into place.

    It took quite a bit of counseling to get me to this place as well. Food was what I turned to to take away my hurts in life. I still struggle with that some, but it's so much better than it used to be. I'm single, but I'll take myself "on a date" every so often. I'll go get my hair done, or take myself shopping, or go watch a movie. "Me" is so much more important than it used to be. My family has also figured out to get out of my way when it comes to working out. It's not negotiable for me. If I say I'm going for a run, move out of my way and I'll be back home when I'm done.

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