A year to change..well, my life!

I'm a 34 year old woman, seeing in 2014 a bit nervous and a bit anxious and being fully aware that this is my last chance to do something about my health and my life. I have tried, and succeeded, then failed twice to take control of my weight and health - the first time in 2008, when I lost and gained back 4 stone, and in 2012 where I lost and gained back 5 stone. The first loss was doing weight watchers but no exercise. The second was purely by diet and exercise alone and determination! I had signed up to do a triathlon, which I completed, in summer 2012, and I also managed to get down to 12st 10lb, my lowest adult weight - but as of this morning, I am back to 16st 13lb.

The thing is, my happiness is resting so heavily on my gaining control, losing weight and finally getting healthy. I want to do this but am so afraid because all my life I have struggled so much with food and weight. I have an unbelievably powerful emotional relationship with food and I know that I need to unravel that if I am ever going to be successful. While I am the way I am now, I will be angry and lack confidence, and take it out on others, and this will lead to me losing the man I love and the life I so desperately want - as a wife and mum.

So this is it for me. I'd love buddies - friends, anyone going through anything similar - people at the start of their journey, part way through or who have even finished and succeeded. I've set myself goals and placed these in envelopes to open on certain dates with the goals for what I want to have lost at each stage - and these are very realistic goals - so I have not set myself up to fail.

I hope to be successful and I hope that there are people here, like me, who can join me on this journey.