Social situations and food

Hey everyone,

I have a quick question regarding my biggest downfall in the weight loss department: social settings. It seems like there are so many family and friend dinners and celebrations in my life and there aren't a great deal of "smart choices" available. I will typically bring a veggie tray or healthy side when I get together with loved ones, but I don't want to be rude and only eat the food that I bring. I have a hard time saying no to a meal that someone worked hard preparing. At the same time, I have a problem with knowing how to eyeball correct portion sizes. I always seem to gain on weekends of eating with family, even after being strict with myself all week. Does anyone have any advice, or is going through a similar situation? I know how to lose weight and eat properly when I am at home or at a restaurant and can track my calories, but the social gatherings are my weakness. I have lost 60 pounds and have been maintaining my weight loss for the past year, but the extra 20 pounds does not want to budge, and this is my problem. Any suggestions? Thanks for your time :)

Replies

  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
    If I know ahead of time that I'm going to be in a social situation later in the week, I try to eat at a deficit in the days leading up to it to give myself some extra calories. If I can't plan for it, then I just fill my plate with a little of everything and try to focus on choices that I know are better for me. But I also love food, so if I really go crazy, I just drink extra water and try to throw in an extra workout.

    If it's family and friends, can you contact the host to get an idea of menu ahead of time? It's much easier to plan if you know whether you're going be staring down grilled chicken or something covered in a cream sauce. And if it's a frequently served dish, ask for the recipe and enter it here to give yourself an idea of the calories per serving (you determine the servings, so if it's cooked in an 8x8 dish, you could call 1/16th of the dish a serving and eyeball that). It's not a perfect solution, but it might help.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Well, there are a few things you can do.

    1. Eat a deficit throughout the week to facilitate the increased calories from the social situation. Your day is less important that your week to week average.

    2. Increase your caloric output throughout the week to increase your average TDEE for that week.

    3. If it is at a restaurant, many have nutritional information online.

    4. If it is at their home, try to get better about portion sizes and perhaps ask them how they prepared things (in normal conversation, no need to seem smug or overly concerned) and do your best to guess.

    5. Provided it isn't a weekly thing, don't stress about it.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    portion control and moderation. If you use a food scale and measure things out regularly, you should start to get a pretty good feel for what a "portion" looks like on your plate. You can also use your fists and palms for guestimation. Portion control and moderation are essential to long term success...'cuz there are always going to be social occasions.

    You may also need to address some perceptions of what is "healthy"...usually when people say things like, "there are not usually any good choices", I automatically kinda think there's some food relationship issues in the mix. Maybe, maybe not but something to think about.
  • BigAlNyc
    BigAlNyc Posts: 20 Member
    Hey everyone,

    I have a quick question regarding my biggest downfall in the weight loss department: social settings. It seems like there are so many family and friend dinners and celebrations in my life and there aren't a great deal of "smart choices" available. I will typically bring a veggie tray or healthy side when I get together with loved ones, but I don't want to be rude and only eat the food that I bring. I have a hard time saying no to a meal that someone worked hard preparing. At the same time, I have a problem with knowing how to eyeball correct portion sizes. I always seem to gain on weekends of eating with family, even after being strict with myself all week. Does anyone have any advice, or is going through a similar situation? I know how to lose weight and eat properly when I am at home or at a restaurant and can track my calories, but the social gatherings are my weakness. I have lost 60 pounds and have been maintaining my weight loss for the past year, but the extra 20 pounds does not want to budge, and this is my problem. Any suggestions? Thanks for your time :)

    An easy way to remember portion size is "Will it fit in the palm of my hand" this will work for most things except very dense high caloric item like ice cream.
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    You can familiarize yourself with what a serving size looks like as well. When I'm at home, I measure a lot of what I eat, so that when I am out with friends, I ain't whippin' out the measuring cups or a scale. I won't be spot on, but I can be fairly accurate. A lot of restaurants now have their nutritional info online, which helps.
  • luckeyfrog
    luckeyfrog Posts: 10 Member
    My husband's family has started trying to get together for things other than food lately- or, if we eat food, we try to tack on something a little healthier like a walk at a park after our brunch. It sounds simple, and not every group will be into that, but try inviting them to go do something at least mildly active with you- you never know!

    As for the choices at family gatherings, It helps when I eat at least something beforehand and drink plenty of water, too... just makes me less hungry. Other than that, I just make sure to ask myself, "Is it worth it?"

    My mom's oreo cookie dessert, that I eat a handful of times a year and is DELICIOUS? Absolutely. It's worth the calories it "costs." Chip dip? Eh. If I can resist- I probably should. I try to save my calories for the handful of things I truly LOVE, and eat a little better before/ after the event (or go do a monster workout) to make up for it!
  • livingleanlivingclean
    livingleanlivingclean Posts: 11,751 Member
    I take my own food. I don't visit friends to be fed, I visit friends to enjoy their company. we try to plan activities instead of meals, or visit at non-food times (morning/afternoon instead of lunch or dinner)
    i'd rather know that I was eating for my goals than eat something so as not to offend someone else.
  • towens00
    towens00 Posts: 1,033 Member

    1. Eat a deficit throughout the week to facilitate the increased calories from the social situation. Your day is less important that your week to week average.

    Best advice I ever got from ETP group. One day or days can't derail your progress, concentrate on your weekly totals.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    My mom's oreo cookie dessert, that I eat a handful of times a year and is DELICIOUS? Absolutely. It's worth the calories it "costs." Chip dip? Eh. If I can resist- I probably should. I try to save my calories for the handful of things I truly LOVE, and eat a little better before/ after the event (or go do a monster workout) to make up for it!

    this.