Losing Weight for my Little Brother

530roman
530roman Posts: 1,819 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I feel like typing this out will really help sink this in better for me. If you are interested in reading this little story then that makes it that much more worthwhile.

This is not new news to me as I have known all my life but my brother was born with a form of kidney disease causing both of his kidneys to function at a very low percentage of what normal is. By the age of 11, one was completely shut down and the other was functioning at such a low percentage that his doctors were actively looking for a donor to match with my brother for a kidney. I was only 15 at the time and could not be tested to donate because of my age. However, my aunt was a match and she donated one of hers to him.

About a year after the transplant, the kidney rejected and my brother was left with only one kidney that was functioning at about 20-25%. It was at the age of 12 that my brother started dialysis, 3 days a week, at the Children's Hospital an hour and a half away from where we live. All through junior high and high school, my brother would miss school on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to go to dialysis for a four hour treatment and a total commute time of three hours round trip.

My brother is now 22 and still does dialysis 3 days a week, thankfully at an adult clinic now which is only a few minutes from where he lives.

The reason this is even a story on MFP's message board is because of me. I am now 25 (seven years older than how old I need to be to donate). I was tested to donate a kidney to my little brother 3 years ago and my lab work concluded that I am a perfect match to donate a kidney to my brother. The shameful part of this story though is that three years ago, doctors told me that although I am a perfect match they could not perform the surgery because of how much overweight I was/am. They told me that since I am overweight, I run a higher risk of developing diabetes with only one kidney and would not perform the surgery with those risks being involved. They told me that I needed to drop my weight down to around 210-220 lbs before they would do the surgery.

I hate to admit that for the past 3 years, I have done nothing to drop the weight and am still at the same weight I was three years ago. I have tried on two different occasions in the last three years to lose weight and I quit both times. The worst feeling is telling my brother that I'm trying to lose weight for the transplant and then giving in to selfish desires for food. My brother doesn't hold any grudges towards me. We have a great relationship and I love him very much.

I am now a week and a half in towards losing the weight that needs to be lost and find myself extremely motivated. My goal is not to drop the weight by starving myself and getting burnt out within a month, but rather to make habit changes that will make me healthier and cause me to lose weight. I have other motivating factors to lose this weight but my brother is most important.

If you took the time to read this, Thank You! I'm not looking to be the most popular guy on MFP but if you think you could be an encouragement to me and want encouragement in return, please add me. I hope to be able to post back on this thread 6 months from now and be able to say that I am able to donate!

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edited to include a picture of my little brother holding my son on May 30, 2012
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Replies

  • leapsonbounds
    leapsonbounds Posts: 77 Member
    Hey there - what a beautiful story. You can do this! You found a great forum for finding friends to motivate you, stick by you, and help you through this. Best wishes on your journey! I'm rooting for you!
  • kreene1987
    kreene1987 Posts: 40 Member
    Awesome reason to stick with it. My suggestion would be to ensure you log every day without fail. If you are accountable to your diet you will be accountable to all of us, and you WILL succeed.

    Can't wait to read your success story of saving 2 lives :) (your own and your brothers)
  • GiveMeCoffee
    GiveMeCoffee Posts: 3,556 Member
    Thank you for sharing your story, and you CAN do this! Log everything honestly and as accurately as possible (digital food scale really helps) strive for consistent not perfection.

    Read this it's great information:

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1175494-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • PBWaffleCakes
    PBWaffleCakes Posts: 900 Member
    I cannot wait to hear your success story. You can do it! Knowing it is a lifestyle change and not a diet makes you ahead of the game. Believe you can do it and you're halfway there!
  • jmburke22
    jmburke22 Posts: 22 Member
    What a great story! I can't wait to see the post about you meeting your goals! This is a great place to be and all the motivation from everyone else is what helps to keep you going. Good luck.
  • 530roman
    530roman Posts: 1,819 Member
    Thank you all. I never thought something like this would all be a part of a little app I installed on my phone. This is great!
  • Ulwaz
    Ulwaz Posts: 380 Member
    Amazing story, bestof luck!
  • littleandysmom
    littleandysmom Posts: 173 Member
    What an amazing story....you can do this!! MFP is a great support system! Please keep us informed of your progress!

    Awesome picture of your brother, son and you!!
  • paigejustine75
    paigejustine75 Posts: 2 Member
    Wow, what a great story. You have my support and I hope to check in and see how you are doing :)
  • Manarelle
    Manarelle Posts: 33 Member
    Kudos to you sir, you have an amazing story and a huge heart. Best wishes to you and your brother!
  • MrsRobertson1005
    MrsRobertson1005 Posts: 552 Member
    You can do it :)
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    What a touching story! feel free to add me, I'm on everyday and I stay very supportive to my friends and i stay active. You can totally do this!!
  • 1ZenGirl
    1ZenGirl Posts: 432 Member
    Congratulations you have just won MFP. That is is the most awesome, selfless story I have come across in a very long time. There is nothing for you now but success in front of you.

    I think your plan is great. Read the link the previous poster gave you, it is full of great information. Use the boards here as reference, ask your questions! People here can certainly get passionate at times but that just makes life interesting.

    I will be taking a piece of your story with me today as I figure out how to give a little something of my own back to the world.

    Well done, you.
  • DorisInTheDena
    DorisInTheDena Posts: 151 Member
    How awesome! I'm pulling for you. You can do this. I'll be looking for an update. :smile:
  • BattleTaxi
    BattleTaxi Posts: 752 Member
    Wow this is great! You can do it dude, one step at a time!!
  • MrsMotivatedMama
    MrsMotivatedMama Posts: 10 Member
    what a beautiful reason! best wishes and may so much success come to you for your weight loss and life in general. keep in mind you are human and will have bad days, dont let them get the best of you and keep going :)
  • amosmoses88
    amosmoses88 Posts: 163 Member
    Awesome story, and I know you can do this! I added you. The more friends you have, the more you feel accountable for your actions especially when you see others around you doing great, it makes you want to do better! Good luck and you got this!!!!
  • hep26000
    hep26000 Posts: 156 Member
    Great story. You can do this. Don't dwell on the past 3 years. Just stay focused on the future. You can add me. I am on every day. :drinker:
  • AJMB704
    AJMB704 Posts: 590 Member
    This is such a wonderful story! Best of luck to you. I'd like to add you as a friend, if you don't mind, so I can watch your progress! I know you can do this!
  • awtume9
    awtume9 Posts: 423 Member
    Dang, what a touching story. Wishing you the best :flowerforyou:
  • alexisdc
    alexisdc Posts: 117 Member
    Yes, this is a beautiful. you can do it. I am gonna friend you right now to help out. dont know how much help I can be... but hey we can do this!!
  • mmommymusings
    mmommymusings Posts: 18 Member
    :bigsmile: You are an amazing big brother. You can do this
  • sturgill
    sturgill Posts: 118
    you are a great brother! good luck on the journey to a healthier you :heart:
  • 530roman
    530roman Posts: 1,819 Member
    Is this real life? All of your words are amazing. Best decision I could have made was coming here. Thanks everybody
  • JDeana14
    JDeana14 Posts: 45 Member
    This is awesome! You sound like a great brother :D I know the struggle with food desire. In the "heat of the moment" I would feel like I lost control of my body and would just eat to my tastebuds' content. But now I tell myself that I want a healthy body more than that [insert food item here] So maybe for you, when you get in those rough times, you can say "My brother needs a kidney more than I need that food/craving" Good luck, I'm rooting for you!
  • gmallan
    gmallan Posts: 2,099 Member
    Sounds like the perfect motivation to lose weight, for your brother, and not only that, once you've lost the weight you'll have the perfect reason to keep it off, for yourself.

    Best of luck
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    You're simply amazing.

    Repeat it to yourself, everyday, why you're doing this. Make a sign to hang on the fridge. Make it your mantra!
  • Nascha333
    Nascha333 Posts: 56
    i was so touched reading your story! I think it is amazing what you are doing for your little brother. The past is the past, the fact that you are here right now doing this says so much. You will succeed,. I agree with logging everthing. I didn't realize how much i actually eat until i began logging and it really keeps you accountable. Also having so much support from your friends on MFP helps a lot.
    I wish you the best and i too look forward to your success story. You've got this, and you can do it. We believe in you!
  • toridehaven
    toridehaven Posts: 95
    Best story ever! It's going to be the best success story soon enough! Keep at it, you can do this.
  • floridamike99
    floridamike99 Posts: 35 Member
    Two thoughts:

    First, you seem to have reached the age/maturity when you come to realize that there is something very noble about thinking and acting on goals beyond just yourself. Good for you--that will be an important element in your success. And by the way, your brother isn't the only other person you should be making this commitment to--what about that little boy? He needs a dad who is healthy and active and involved in the process of guiding him to become a fine young man some day. Your fitness will influence him--and your lack of fitness would have influenced him too. But don't worry about that--he is too young to remember how you are now--he'll only know the fit, active guy you are about to become.

    Second, the wonderful thing about kidney transplants is that when they take, they are AMAZING. I know first hand. My partner received a transplant on 8-6-08. It was incredible! After years of being really sick, sleeping 15-20 hours a day and never having any energy he became completely normal (more or less--LOL) in a matter of days following his transplant. Without getting too carried away with the analogy, it was like he had lost his life and then it was given back to him. We now celebrate August 6th as his birthday. He has been able to return to work, take vacations and be a normal guy. And his donor was a deceased, non relative--statistically the least successful of transplants. Imagine what may come from a gift that you may be able to give, as a living, related donor. The bottom line is that you will be working toward not just giving a kidney, but a whole new life to your brother.

    Keep after it--just focus on TODAY, and it will take on a life of its own. I was once 5'11" 274 and I got down to about 195 (I regained a little, but I am nipping that in the bud now). If you are at all like me, once you start to see the results that will motivate you more. And guys--young guys in particular--often can lose weight really quick. Just commit that TODAY you are going to well--don't think about that you have to lose 50, 60 , 70 pounds--that is an overwhelming task. Just do well TODAY. Anybody can do that! And pretty soon you will realize you have strung together 10 or 15 TODAYS and you'll start to see small results. Then commit a few more TODAYS and you'll look up and it will be February and you may be 10 pounds lighter than you were on New Years. That's when it will sink in and you will really get energized by it. And if you screw up a today, its just one today--you got a bunch of them ahead of you! And you know what--you WILL screw up at some point. No big deal--just start that next morning with a commitment to do well TODAY.

    Good luck to you. Let us know how it goes. You are doing an important thing.

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