Some of my thoughts on emotional eating

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You were not a full fledged emotional eater. The emotional eaters I'm talking about are borderline binge eaters. They've tweaked diets and tried time and time again. They've even hired people like me or dietitians to put them on a "proper" diet and there's still no relief.

It's because the last thing that these people need is a traditional diet. Food, any food, is simply a vehicle to achieve something else. It is no wonder many people go into an almost "trance like" state when they eat - they are not savouring or tasting it - but rather using it. They cannot even remember exactly what they have eaten sometimes. A normal person stops eating when they are full, a binge eater stops when they hate themselves...

In reality another diet based upon restriction and deprivation is exactly the opposite of what they need because it sets in place a destructive cycle for the person's self esteem. They start out wanting to be perfect. They crack because they are human. They binge. Their self esteem lowers. They tighten their restrictions because hey, not only do they have their existing weight to get off, they have that binge to contend with. They crack. They binge. Round and round it goes until you are left with a person who feels entirely powerless and helpless to change. It is a nightmare.

Can you imagine if we spoke to our children the way that some dieters speak to themselves mentally? Say if your beautiful child was taking their first steps and fell over and instead of lavish praise and high fives the parents said "Are you stupid? You're such a failure! You can't even walk!" Now imagine that scenario repeated over and over again with that child every time they tried to walk. Now further imagine that scenario with millions of children. What would you be left with? A nation of people who have grown up housebound and afraid to take a single step.

And so it is with millions of dieters....

Thanks for this thread. It is very thought provoking.

:flowerforyou:

tagging to read later

Bump to keep in my topics.

I just searched "emotional eating" because I had an all out binge when I came home from work today. I was a machine for a good 30 minutes of shoveling food into my face. I wrote it all down and logged it, because I want to be accountable for what I eat, but I realized as I was shoving the last bit of food into my mouth that I was angry and frustrated and I know that was the reason for my binge. I regret eating all that food now. I will likely skip dinner because I will probably still be full, and I'm so far over my daily calories and macros, that eating anything else just adds more damage.

It snowed here yesterday. A lot. I wanted to go outside and shovel, because I knew I wouldn't get out for my regular walk because it was slippery out there. I knew I could burn some calories shoveling and wanted to use the opportunity to at least get a little bit of exercise in. I know if I don't exercise, I tend to want to eat. The exercising is almost like a mental cue to me to stay on track with my eating.

I got home from work early and shoveled the first couple of inches of snow. Then my husband came home and took over shoveling. I wanted to go back out last night after the snow plows came through, because our driveway got plowed in. My husband didn't want me to go out because it was still snowing hard and he said we could just deal with it in the morning once all the snow was finished (and it was about 5 degrees outsides). So, annoyed, I didn't go outside. I kind of resented him for telling me he wanted me to wait. He KNEW I wanted to shovel for exercise, yet he didn't seem to want me to do it. I got up this morning, and was about to go outside to start digging out, and again, my husband asked me to wait for him because (he said) I would walk on the snow and make sticky spots that we wouldn't be able to shovel through. I'm not an idiot and I know to shovel before I walk so I don't tramp the snow down and make it stick to the driveway. Instead, he got up and went outside and shoveled and used the snow blower for two hours. I stayed inside and worked on my laptop. I was thoroughly annoyed with him for taking away my opportunity to exercise and yet I said nothing to him. I should have spoken up but didn't. Instead, I kept my anger to myself, went to work, and then came home to unleash my anger on a large amount of leftover birthday cake, some potato chips, an apple with peanut butter and chocolate chips, some trail mix, some Oreos, some leftover cashew chicken, and some chocolate chip cookies. I did about 2500 calories worth of damage when all was said and done. And what did that get me? Remorse for binge eating and continued frustration with my husband's inability to understand my needs.

I'm sitting here with tears running down my face because I know I need to do something about the emotional eating or I will never be able to maintain all my hard work. I feel like I have been losing control over my eating since the holidays.

If anyone knows of any books I can read to help myself work through this, your suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Sorry if this is so long.....I type a lot when I'm venting. :-)

Very timely for me. Maintaining feels like hell, it's harder than cutting. I'm really seeing my emotional eating for what it is. I realise I've been disordered about it for decades. I've got no idea what's going on right now with my hunger and cravings. I'm staying right here to figure it out. Bit by bit, with help from you MFP lovelies.

bump to read later. beautifully written. I'm hoping this thread will help me. Thank you

I have BED for forever. I'm from a dysfunctional background. I've been in OA (helpful sometimes, sometimes not), I appreciate everything you wrote OP.

IDK if this will help anyone here, but I'm back eating fiber rich superfood air popped popcorn. Yesterday I had 3 unpopped tblsps of the stuff and it totally helped me lose weight overnight, I put a popcorn seasoning (kernel seasoning) on it, & spray it with water from a spray bottle so the seasoning stays on. As of yesterday, that is helping me. I'm not eating trigger foods, or any other foods for my "snacks", which seem to derail all my weight loss efforts.

I still have BED, but for now this is a helpful solution for myself.

Thx again to the OP.

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Great post! Our emotions are not food, so we shouldn't eat them! A journal is also a great idea.