How badly do we want this??
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Gemmz2014
Posts: 220
Okay, I want to drop 50lbs. I've been wanting to drop that amount for the last 4 years. Why haven't I done it? Why haven't I lasted more than 2-3 weeks without throwing in the towel? I see results when I begin and then I just develop an "I don't really care" attitude and give up. But I do care.
Does this happen with anyone else?
Does this happen with anyone else?
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Replies
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It's all in your head. Everyone has a choice to make.0
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I think you should have made the title of this "How badly do I want this". It's not anyone else's journey to lose your weight, just yours.0
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It helped me to break up the goals into smaller ones so I could stay motivated. I also had a fitness goal and enjoyed progressing with running and other exercise. Maybe you could try that instead of just setting an end goal weight and facing months and months without feeling properly rewarded. Some people pay themselves to lose weight, too, so much for whatever pounds, or reward themselves periodically with trips for clothes, a movie, music, anything that isn't food related. So you could try that, too.0
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It's all in your head. Everyone has a choice to make.
^ this. The only person holding you back is yourself. Defeat the voice in your head that tells you to quit and don't look back.0 -
Used to happen to me all the time. About 4 years ago (before I started here), one of my best friends even asked me why I thought I gained the weight back after my last diet was fairly successful. At first I blew it off as a "the past is the past and I don't want to harp on it" thing because I was doing well with my current attempt. But I couldn't get it out of my head so I gave it some thought and realized that a big part of it was being to hard on myself. I'd diet like most of us do - cut out all the supposed bad foods and workout like a fiend - so it was no wonder that a month or two down the road I'd be burned out and miserable and decide that I'd rather be happy eating what I liked and being lazy than being skinny and miserable.
That goodness I figured out that there is a happy medium (and boy do I love living here!)!! You don't have to starve yourself and you don't have to cut out all the foods you love and you don't have to work out 2 hours a day. As long as you have a calorie deficit, you will lose weight. If you're also looking to improve health and fitness, eat a well balanced diet, including the occassional treat and get some regular activity in. That's somewhat of an oversimplification but generally true for us all.
Set small reasonable goals. Don't be so hard on yourself. Be patient and as consistent as you can be.0 -
Your methods might be in for an examination.
Generally if you want it bad enough you will make it happen. But if your methods are unsound you're setting yourself up for inevitable failure. Now might be a good time to take a good, hard, critical look at what you're doing and why you're failing.0 -
Okay, I want to drop 50lbs. I've been wanting to drop that amount for the last 4 years. Why haven't I done it? Why haven't I lasted more than 2-3 weeks without throwing in the towel? I see results when I begin and then I just develop an "I don't really care" attitude and give up. But I do care.
Does this happen with anyone else?
No, this doesn't happen with me, But have you thought about trying to loose one to five pounds at a time rather than 50? I know that I would do better thinking of it in a smaller number. Fifty pounds seems like so much, one to five pounds doesn't.
You can make this happen!0 -
I understand how hard it is. I've struggled for years as well. Its a matter of making up your mind and pushing yourself. Sometimes I think posting blogs and asking for help really doesn't help unless your mentally ready to start making changes. Some people may not get "you" and understand that its "really" a struggle. They give you these answers that kind of make you feel like your not trying hard enough. I know for a fact because I think I will fail and so I never get started or I start and say yes I can do it and then start aching and feeling depressed because I have such a long road ahead of me.
I have friends who struggled with the same issue but they started making a difference for themselves and are doing awesome with amazing results and I am still stuck with 75 pounds to lose. Its true that its a mental stagnant.
So, I have made up my mind to quit asking for help on how to get motivated. I am starting to motivate myself. Pray about it and ask for endurance and mental motivation and help to endure the aches that will come along with this change. Keep smiling and stay positive. Take pictures of yourself, watch your eating, even if your don't log it on MFP all the time. Post your pictures in bathroom of where you are and where you want to be. You can do it!
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Your methods might be in for an examination.
Generally if you want it bad enough you will make it happen. But if your methods are unsound you're setting yourself up for inevitable failure. Now might be a good time to take a good, hard, critical look at what you're doing and why you're failing.
After four years, what else can I possibly do to take a harder look?? I'm seriously asking you this.0 -
I understand how hard it is. I've struggled for years as well. Its a matter of making up your mind and pushing yourself. Sometimes I think posting blogs and asking for help really doesn't help unless your mentally ready to start making changes. Some people may not get "you" and understand that its "really" a struggle. They give you these answers that kind of make you feel like your not trying hard enough. I know for a fact because I think I will fail and so I never get started or I start and say yes I can do it and then start aching and feeling depressed because I have such a long road ahead of me.
I have friends who struggled with the same issue but they started making a difference for themselves and are doing awesome with amazing results and I am still stuck with 75 pounds to lose. Its true that its a mental stagnant.
So, I have made up my mind to quit asking for help on how to get motivated. I am starting to motivate myself. Pray about it and ask for endurance and mental motivation and help to endure the aches that will come along with this change. Keep smiling and stay positive. Take pictures of yourself, watch your eating, even if your don't log it on MFP all the time. Post your pictures in bathroom of where you are and where you want to be. You can do it!
Nice post, thank you.0 -
It's not easy. It's not always fun. It's hard, miserable, and uncomfortable at first. But, something interesting happens after a few weeks. You reach a point where you realize what you've done is working and it's not quite as hard as it was when you started. So, you face the decision: stop now, or keep going?
If you don't have something in your mind that can galvanize and motivate you, then you don't have any reason to keep going. It's easier to quit and go back to old habits. But deciding to move forward and continue on is a decision that sometimes needs to be made every day or every hour or even every bite. The end result is you will lose that 50 lbs., you'll be healthier, and you will have succeeded in reaching your goal.
The first day I worked out, I puked afterward. Now, I'm nearly 1/3 of my way to my goal! It was only one decision that got me this far: working out the second day.
Hang in there! You can do it!0 -
Your methods might be in for an examination.
Generally if you want it bad enough you will make it happen. But if your methods are unsound you're setting yourself up for inevitable failure. Now might be a good time to take a good, hard, critical look at what you're doing and why you're failing.
After four years, what else can I possibly do to take a harder look?? I'm seriously asking you this.
A botanist could spend a week examining a car engine and never be able to tell that it won't stay running because of a failing fuel pressure regulator if he doesn't have the mechanical knowledge necessary to diagnose the issue.
In other words, you may not have the knowledge or experience necessary to identify the flaw in your methods.0 -
Start with exercise if you don't do any, that is what honestly changed it for me - helped lower a lot of stress and what has managed to keep me going for a year. It's good to start with something new and something you don't do. Also don't restrict your diet too much and you have to learn to be extremely patient.0
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Okay, I want to drop 50lbs. I've been wanting to drop that amount for the last 4 years. Why haven't I done it? Why haven't I lasted more than 2-3 weeks without throwing in the towel? I see results when I begin and then I just develop an "I don't really care" attitude and give up. But I do care.
Does this happen with anyone else?
Perhaps you are just not yet ready to make a life-long commitment.
Perhaps you are pushing yourself too hard and fast during those 2-3 weeks when you have tried it so you end up feeling tired and hungry and therefore lose motivation.
Perhaps you see this big goal of 50lbs and it seems too overwhelming, rather than breaking it down into 1lb at a time.
Only you can really know why you're not succeeding.0 -
Are you maybe trying too hard? Putting in so much effort to try to see results that what you are doing feels unsustainable. Maybe it isn't so much a case of "I don't care" as "I don't care enough to do this".
If you relaxed your expectations and tried to lose it slowly and with a minimum of struggle, you might find you need less motivation day to day. Try for small improvements, and don't push yourself to be perfect. You might find you are able to stick with it and reach your goal, albeit slowly.0 -
Your methods might be in for an examination.
Generally if you want it bad enough you will make it happen. But if your methods are unsound you're setting yourself up for inevitable failure. Now might be a good time to take a good, hard, critical look at what you're doing and why you're failing.
QFT.
It's mind over matter, but if you're shooting yourself in the foot every day your mind is not going to be right.
Rigger0 -
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Used to happen to me all the time. About 4 years ago (before I started here), one of my best friends even asked me why I thought I gained the weight back after my last diet was fairly successful. At first I blew it off as a "the past is the past and I don't want to harp on it" thing because I was doing well with my current attempt. But I couldn't get it out of my head so I gave it some thought and realized that a big part of it was being to hard on myself. I'd diet like most of us do - cut out all the supposed bad foods and workout like a fiend - so it was no wonder that a month or two down the road I'd be burned out and miserable and decide that I'd rather be happy eating what I liked and being lazy than being skinny and miserable.
That goodness I figured out that there is a happy medium (and boy do I love living here!)!! You don't have to starve yourself and you don't have to cut out all the foods you love and you don't have to work out 2 hours a day. As long as you have a calorie deficit, you will lose weight. If you're also looking to improve health and fitness, eat a well balanced diet, including the occassional treat and get some regular activity in. That's somewhat of an oversimplification but generally true for us all.
Set small reasonable goals. Don't be so hard on yourself. Be patient and as consistent as you can be.
Solid and helpful advice. Consistency and small, reasonable goals are so, so important!0 -
Ok...this absolutely happens with me! I think its just because I didn't want it bad enough. Now instead of focusing on getting skinny, I'm trying to focus on a healthy lifestyle. Its only been a couple of days but I haven't thrown in the towel yet. Feel free to add me...we can stick to this together!0
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