the effect of your boyfriends on your diet?

My boyfriend doesnt support my diet and even he is getting fatter. I like this site now i am going to sleep. fell free to add me. all have a nice day/night.
«1

Replies

  • toniistracking
    toniistracking Posts: 57 Member
    Sorry to hear that Maria! It's hard to be successful when loved ones don't support you. We are here for you though!
  • fitfan11
    fitfan11 Posts: 544 Member
    Consider us part of you extended family. We have your back! Thanks for the add!
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    My husband burns water, so I'm in control of the cooking. He eats what I fix or he can make a pb & j sammich. He's learned to love a much larger variety of foods because I don't give him another option, lol
  • Thank you all for your supports. I am very happy to join this site.I have eager to read all in this site.
  • dsaintphard
    dsaintphard Posts: 8 Member
    i am so sorry to hear that.. im fairly new to this site and getting my fitness back. i will add you so we can support one another
  • My boyfriend supports my dieting & exercise, as a matter of fact he can be sometimes be down right rude about my current weight, but the terrible flip side is that he also stresses me out to the point where I want to run to comfort food. My advice to all ladies who has a non-supportive boyfriend, keep this part of your life separate, be independent and do your own thing. Being fit and healthy is a sacred thing and does not necessarily require the support of your partner, look at their no-support as motivation.
  • My boyfriend likes women with "some meat on their bones". Now, I have about 100lbs or so of "extra meat", so I'm actually nervous that he won't like my smaller body as much as my current (which I hate). Luckily, he is the sweetest man alive and fully supportive of all my endevours.

    However, that being said, he is a rail. In fact, his current weight (~170lbs), is my goal weight. He eats tons of crap (although, thanks to me, he is adding more veggies into his diet, even when im not around!) and doesn't seem to gain a pound. It can be tough hanging out with him, especially going out to eat, because unless its homecooked, its difficult to find healthy food that isnt a salad (and even then, those can be very unhealthy). Add to the fact that we are both craft beer lovers and yeah, a beer or two can add a lot of caloric bulk to a meal :/

    On the plus side, he is pretty active so in nice weather, I get some good outdoor exercise in. I've realized that healthy eating is done for my benefit, and I cannot let anyone change that because this is my body and its the only one I get. He supports my health goals and does the best he can to help :)

    I sent you a friend request for support!
  • katiethornton4
    katiethornton4 Posts: 1 Member
    When I started dating my boyfriend I was around 140lb, a month ago (been seeing each other about 18month) I tipped the scales at 172lb! Been dieting which he does help me with) and now weigh 160lb. Still a bit to go but getting there! I think you put weight on in fairly new relationships because your always going out for dinner, getting takeaways etc! Good luck to all x
  • LittleMissYoYo
    LittleMissYoYo Posts: 88 Member
    My boyfriend support me all the weigh, especially when it's his fault I gained over 4 stone in 5 years haha! He keeps buying me chocolates as gifts!
  • My fiance is heavier than the recommended weight for his height too, although he has less to lose than me to get into the healthy weight range. He does want to lose weight too, but he isn't as committed as I am yet, and I don't think calorie counting really suits him. I think it's a very fine line between loving your partner as they are and being supportive of their efforts to change. I never mention diets at work or on social media (obviously this site doesn't count!) as I know weight loss talk can be upsetting, shaming or just downright dull, so him and my mother are basically the only people I talk to about my attempt to lose weight. Generally, he's interested up to a point but then I can sense him starting to glaze over :) But I don't mind that too much - after all, I want to change for myself, not for him.
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
    My boyfriend support me all the weigh, especially when it's his fault I gained over 4 stone in 5 years haha! He keeps buying me chocolates as gifts!

    Love the pun :smile:

    Mine buys me chocolate too - he loves to make me smile :smile: Otherwise he's been really really supportive, always asking "will this fit in with your diet?", "how many calories are these?", "are you allowed this?". He's pretty into fitness so he comes on my runs with me too and when I lack motivation I ask for "Drill Seargent Rob" to help - he's TA (technically a lieutenant) and used to be a specialist civilian instructor in PT and martial arts at one of the military bases .
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    My boyfriend does not control how much I eat, I do.
  • Thank you all for your supports!!!
  • sbarella
    sbarella Posts: 713 Member
    My boyfriend hates chocolate, he doesn't like eating out and his fridge is pretty much always empty except for some meat and lettuce (I hate both), so his "support" has been invaluable so far. If we'll ever get married, trouble may arise :laugh:
  • Amanda_Gx6
    Amanda_Gx6 Posts: 320 Member
    my boyfriend lost a bunch of weight recently which propelled me into the wtf am I waiting for mentality lol so now I'm about 5 lbs down. He has previously told me I should try to lose a couple pounds which at the time sent me into the crazy woman I'm going to kick your *kitten* and cry mentality but now I see he was just being his honest self
  • angelique_redhead
    angelique_redhead Posts: 782 Member
    My DH eats what he wants pretty much and shut up about my diet. He knows that I cook a healthy amount but if he wants to overeat he can. I cook enough he can stuff it all down or leave some leftovers for later or the next day. He stopped trying to get me to overeat when he saw how much MFP gives me for calories since he's why I can use the site now. I joined in June 2012 but was clicking in the wrong spots so couldn't add anything. September 20, 2012 his doctor convinced him to join MFP, he showed me how to use the site and I've had no problems with him trying to force me to eat ever since. :D Good luck! *HUGS*
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    In my case, it's more like MY effect on THEIR diets.
  • He has a much larger appetite than me (being over a foot taller!), but I get this psychological thing where I always want the bigger plate anyway... I tend to serve us equal portions, eat until I feel I'm done then give him the leftovers so I don't pick and so that he effectively gets a larger portion anyway. ;)
  • when I started dating my boyfriend I weighed 198 and that was 2 years ago. Now I weigh 233. Believe me I know the struggle of gaining weight through a relationship. My boyfriend supports my goals and occasionally eat healthy with me but other than that he is a typical guy who eats what he wants and doesn't put up much weight. throughout our relationship, eating together was like a hobby. it was our favorite thing to do together, which is terrible. My boyfriends eats in such large portions and he would serve me food in the exact same portion and then my appetite started to open up more and more. Then came the weight gain, and less trips to the gym didn't help either. Trust me, you need to build your own discipline and don't worry about his diet or what he is eating. seeing others eat what you can't have will always be a tease, but hang in there!
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
    My boyfriend does not control how much I eat, I do.

    Controlling what you eat and supporting you are different. Yes, the boyf can't and shouldn't try to control what you eat, but you should expect some support and encouragement e.g. praise when you do good, help when you're having a bad day, encouragement when you're lacking motivation.
  • lthames0810
    lthames0810 Posts: 722 Member
    The SO has no effect at all on my diet. We are probably the same degree of fat in proportion to our sizes. Whether or not we are happy with our own or each other's weight never comes up, although I know he's aware of my efforts. He's just kind of "whatever" about it and I don't bore him with the details.

    He doesn't cook so he eats whatever I fix for meals and doesn't ever complain. I make plenty when I cook so he eats as much as he wants of it. I don't know what he eats when we are apart from each other. He chooses and buys his own snacks and drinks if he doesn't want what I buy. I bicycle and go to the gym, but he has no interest in either one and he has his own things he likes to do. We have a shared hobby that has nothing to do with fitness or food and that gives us enough time to be together and appreciate each other.

    I hope you will do your diet for your own reasons and not to please or influence someone else.
  • Chilepepper34
    Chilepepper34 Posts: 53 Member
    My boyfriend supports my dieting & exercise, as a matter of fact he can be sometimes be down right rude about my current weight, but the terrible flip side is that he also stresses me out to the point where I want to run to comfort food. >>>My advice to all ladies who has a non-supportive boyfriend, keep this part of your life separate, be independent and do your own thing. Being fit and healthy is a sacred thing and does not necessarily require the support of your partner, look at their no-support as motivation.<<<

    ^^ this right here is perfect. So well said. My boyfriend is now supportive that I have told him how important it is FOR ME to lose weight. I am doing it for myself, not him and perhaps he finds that an attractive quality. As some of you have mentioned, I definitely gained "relationship weight", the kind you gain from eating poorly on dates and just generally not actively caring about my weight -- But now I do!
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    My boyfriend does not control how much I eat, I do.

    Controlling what you eat and supporting you are different. Yes, the boyf can't and shouldn't try to control what you eat, but you should expect some support and encouragement e.g. praise when you do good, help when you're having a bad day, encouragement when you're lacking motivation.

    Support is nice, but not required. If you don't get those things from him, get it somewhere else.
  • mumblemagic
    mumblemagic Posts: 1,090 Member
    My boyfriend does not control how much I eat, I do.

    Controlling what you eat and supporting you are different. Yes, the boyf can't and shouldn't try to control what you eat, but you should expect some support and encouragement e.g. praise when you do good, help when you're having a bad day, encouragement when you're lacking motivation.

    Support is nice, but not required. If you don't get those things from him, get it somewhere else.

    Partially agree - yes support is not required, I could do this without his support. But he's great and I like having his support, and having had a supportive boyf I don't think I would want an unsupportive one, if that makes sense.

    TBH from what I've read, I think most of the "unsupportive boyfriends" people talk about on the forums are just a bit clueless, and not actually *trying* to be unsupportive. I reackon a conversation about e.g. how to achieve your aims, what kinds of things you want to be eating, and letting him know it makes it harder if he's eating yummy junk food near you would fix most of the problems people talk about- boys don't always think of that stuff themselves!
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    I view it differently, I guess, because the turning point for me to make changes was really grasping the reality that nobody can do it for me. It is all on me, it is all about my choices. No more waiting for the stars to all align in perfect harmony and everyone to put in effort to try to help me do something they can't really help with.
  • somefitsomefat
    somefitsomefat Posts: 445 Member
    Sorry your b/f is getting fat. Hopefully you can lose a ton of weight and get a skinny b/f. Good luck!
  • nikibean123
    nikibean123 Posts: 81 Member
    My boyfriend is uber supportive. He encourages me to go to the gym if I'm in two minds about it. He says he can see I've lost weight but I'm not quite there yet which is very true. He's v honest and it's great to have genuine feedback!
  • chrs86
    chrs86 Posts: 151 Member
    My wife hates that I stay skinny (*by her standards) and try to eat right. So we always have whole milk and skim milk. Sometimes I'll mix half my skim into her milk so she could lose a pound or 2. And shes always baking crap then looking at me retarded when I get home from the gym and look in the mirror and laughs at me. She's really rude sometimes.
  • jos05
    jos05 Posts: 263 Member
    I've noticed over the last couple of years that if I have someone in my life; my plans always seem to alter themselves. Most people I date don't understand the need to get up early and hit the gym... Or the fact that I don't want to stay out to 2am and have a bunch of alcoholic beverages...

    I have a plan... I have a life... someone can either come along and enhance it... or they can stay the heck away from me...lol!

    :) Guess I've just been single for awhile.
  • WranglerMichelle
    WranglerMichelle Posts: 529 Member
    When I first met my fiance, I was 195 (at 5'4") and he was 135 (at 5'9"). I was overweight and he was underweight. Now, I'm 144 and he's 155. Never would have thought I would weigh less than him! He loved me when I was 195 and has been my biggest supporter this whole time. He encourages me to work out and will even go running with me if I don't feel like it, just to motivate me. A lot of times, he'll look at the muscles I'm getting or notice I've lost some weight and it will motivate him to stay in shape, too. We're a team - we motivate each other.

    He doesn't track his food, but he knows I do and will ask if I'm allowed to have something/if I've tracked something that looks like a potential cheat food. The only time he "restricts" what I eat is if I ask him to. The most recent example was over Christmas when my boss gave me a 5-lb. gift basket of chocolate. I asked him to help me keep disciplined with it, so he keeps it in a place I can't reach and pulls it down once a week so I can enjoy a piece or two or three. Then it goes back up and away until the following week. That's a system that works for me!