A CALORIE IS NOT!!! A CALORIE

zachbonner
zachbonner Posts: 4,285 Member
in Chit-Chat
JK it is.

Replies

  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    You're not a Zach, you're a celery! :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry:
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    Yousa funny guy! Now pass me a cadbury egg!
  • SweetTrouble_
    SweetTrouble_ Posts: 933 Member
    I don't believe you.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
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  • byustrongman
    byustrongman Posts: 74 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    A calorie is not a calorie if its from bacon or alcohol...those are free calories. Trust me, its only taken me 20 years to lose 5 pounds
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
    But what about a cleanse with a Dr. Oz supplement? Think that'll make the fat go away overnight?
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that
  • Strangegirlz
    Strangegirlz Posts: 92 Member
    What about raspberry ketones, there's a great groupon offer, seems to be on constantly
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
    What about raspberry ketones, there's a great groupon offer, seems to be on constantly

    Or is it Keytones. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. (from the other thread)
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that

    Don't forget to add Tabasco!
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that


    Don't forget to add Tabasco!


    Oh yes, not only so you will you have the almighty shizzies, but they will burn your *kitten* to the point of needing the healing power of vaseline! Id rather just eat indian food, same results but it tastes way better and is more filling
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    Should I eat my exercise calories back? Kinda seems meaningless. I am already eating 800 calories of lean ground baby unicorn, and can't imagine eating more than that. I don't want to eat anything except unicorn though cause it has 0 carbs. I do get nervous that the enormous amount of protein found in baby unicorn will make me bulky though.
  • Strangegirlz
    Strangegirlz Posts: 92 Member
    What about raspberry ketones, there's a great groupon offer, seems to be on constantly

    Or is it Keytones. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. (from the other thread)

    Could be a new improved version
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    Should I eat my exercise calories back? Kinda seems meaningless. I am already eating 800 calories of lean ground baby unicorn, and can't imagine eating more than that. I don't want to eat anything except unicorn though cause it has 0 carbs. I do get nervous that the enormous amount of protein found in baby unicorn will make me bulky though.

    You can stir fry unicorn with some super yummy 0 calorie noodles that you must rinse for 100 minutes to get the smell of death off them
  • victal
    victal Posts: 1,375 Member
    Prove it!!!
  • MagJam2004
    MagJam2004 Posts: 651 Member
    You can stir fry unicorn with some super yummy 0 calorie noodles that you must rinse for 100 minutes to get the smell of death off them

    this post made me sad...:cry:
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that


    Don't forget to add Tabasco!


    Oh yes, not only so you will you have the almighty shizzies, but they will burn your *kitten* to the point of needing the healing power of vaseline! Id rather just eat indian food, same results but it tastes way better and is more filling

    Yes, but with the Tabasco and *kitten* burn, you won't want to eat anything else. You'll be disposing of all those calories thus creating negative calories. This will in turn help you lose all of your weight in a matter of hours!
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    A calorie is not a calorie if its from bacon or alcohol...those are free calories. Trust me, its only taken me 20 years to lose 5 pounds

    and they're bonus, fitness increasing elixirs if the bacon and alcohol are mixed together in a bacon rum or whisky.
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    A calorie is not a calorie if its from bacon or alcohol...those are free calories. Trust me, its only taken me 20 years to lose 5 pounds

    and they're bonus, fitness increasing elixirs if the bacon and alcohol are mixed together in a bacon rum or whisky.

    I pretty much need to *kitten* it out after that statement.
  • Chillyfrog
    Chillyfrog Posts: 207 Member
    JK it is.
    Ron-Burgundy-What-Did-You-Say-Anchorman_zpsa07b9bef.gif

    :cry:
  • littleburgy
    littleburgy Posts: 570 Member
    Mmmmmm. Calories.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Thank you for this enlightening, awe-inspiring post. I, too, sometimes just want to make a thread.
  • aleggett321
    aleggett321 Posts: 186 Member
    Baby unicorn loin marinated overnight in bacon whiskey and deep fried in fat free oil. Nom.
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that


    Don't forget to add Tabasco!


    Oh yes, not only so you will you have the almighty shizzies, but they will burn your *kitten* to the point of needing the healing power of vaseline! Id rather just eat indian food, same results but it tastes way better and is more filling

    Yes, but with the Tabasco and *kitten* burn, you won't want to eat anything else. You'll be disposing of all those calories thus creating negative calories. This will in turn help you lose all of your weight in a matter of hours!

    But will it rid me of all those gross toxins?
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    But I thought sugar was literally poison?
    You're okay if you're on a cleanse.

    The only cleanses that truly work are salt water or lemon juice ones. Anything else is obsolete, because the body cannot work on its own without lemons or salt water...or..something like that


    Don't forget to add Tabasco!


    Oh yes, not only so you will you have the almighty shizzies, but they will burn your *kitten* to the point of needing the healing power of vaseline! Id rather just eat indian food, same results but it tastes way better and is more filling

    Yes, but with the Tabasco and *kitten* burn, you won't want to eat anything else. You'll be disposing of all those calories thus creating negative calories. This will in turn help you lose all of your weight in a matter of hours!

    But will it rid me of all those gross toxins?

    Only if the lemon juice and tobasco are organic, and the salt you use is from dehydrated virgin tears
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    Unknown
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