Not sure how long I can do this for....

mrsbuzz
mrsbuzz Posts: 576 Member
edited September 22 in Motivation and Support
So some of you out there may be friends with me and hear me talk negative a lot. But I am seriously starting to struggle with this whole new lifestyle thing. I don't want to stop losing weight, but its so hard to eat right all the time. I feel like I am drowning or something. Or its like I have 2 people in my brain lol.....seriously I have one part of me that says we can do this its worth it...then the other one is like screw it just eat and forget it. It's such a tug of war in my brain. Am I the only one like this??

How do you stay with it and lose the weight?

Replies

  • smuehlbauer
    smuehlbauer Posts: 1,041 Member
    I got rid of the second voice in my head.
  • DON'T EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WITH THIS PROBLEM.

    I struggle EVERY single day with that other voice in my head. One little thing that helps me out in a big way is to allow myself one day out of every week to just eat whatever and however much of stuff that I want. It helps to keep me on track on the other days, because I see it as a reward for being so good, and it doesn't negatively affect my weight loss.
  • P.S. I've been at this for over six years now, and I've never been able to get that other voice to shut the he** up!
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    DON'T EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WITH THIS PROBLEM.

    I struggle EVERY single day with that other voice in my head. One little thing that helps me out in a big way is to allow myself one day out of every week to just eat whatever and however much of stuff that I want. It helps to keep me on track on the other days, because I see it as a reward for being so good, and it doesn't negatively affect my weight loss.

    I agree, Saturdays are my "go nuts" days, and you'll soon find out that you don't go that nuts...maybe one meal will be over your calories but then sunday you get right back at 'er...give yourself a break, it took you a long time to learn how to live unhealthy, it's goign to take you some time to learn how to live healthy...
  • blumuse
    blumuse Posts: 52 Member
    I look at myself naked in the mirror and cringe. No food is worth how low my self esteem is.
  • jillybeanruns
    jillybeanruns Posts: 1,420 Member
    Motivation isn't something someone can give you. If you don't want be healthier and live longer (forget about the actual number on the scale) then you have no reason for being here. Simply put.

    I am a super competitive person by nature, even if I'm competing against myself and how I used to be. It's not about food for me, it's about my overall health and fitness. I've never felt deprived as I am allowed to have whatever I want, just in moderation. I don't eat out a lot and can't tolerate fast food, so I don't eat a lot of greasy crap.

    Also you don't have to "eat right all the time" but you do have to eat right 90% of the time.
  • Mindful_Trent
    Mindful_Trent Posts: 3,954 Member
    Sit down and think about how you feel when you eat right and exercise. Then think about how you feel when you don't. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. For me, it's a HUGE difference. Sure, it takes a little more effort/conscious decision making to live healthier, but really, the benefits WAY outweight the costs. I'll slip up now and then - I expect to, and that's okay, but I could NEVER go back to permanantly eating whatever I want as much as I want all the time. I felt bad, I was unhealthy (headed toward being even more unhealthy) and I wasn't the person I wanted to be.

    I think of it this way - my health is NOT an optional thing. I want to be healthy and alive for years to come - eating well and exercising is just part of that. Ditch the other voice by letting it know that the "just screw it and forget it" is not an option whatsoever.
  • tacey21
    tacey21 Posts: 73 Member
    DON'T EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WITH THIS PROBLEM.

    I struggle EVERY single day with that other voice in my head. One little thing that helps me out in a big way is to allow myself one day out of every week to just eat whatever and however much of stuff that I want. It helps to keep me on track on the other days, because I see it as a reward for being so good, and it doesn't negatively affect my weight loss.

    Exactly.
    Everyone has those voices. And having a cheat day or even a night out helps.
    Every Saturday I go to the bar with my boyfriend and have a gin and tonic or two ;) I sit at the bar and watch him eat a huge cheeseburger... and realize how much I DONT want his food. And I save my cheat meal for something I know I want to eat.

    You need to infuse some positivity in your life. Read the first chapter of The Secret. :) Or watch Pollyanna and play the "glad game". I know it sounds stupid... but it really does help. And dont beat yourself up :) There's always a chance to do better IMMEDIATELY. Not tomorrow. You mess up, you can change it now.

    Keep up the good work...let us know how you're doing.
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
    Sometimes I feel the same way, I tend to get over it as I am sliding my butt in my "fat" jeans and that sweater big enough to be a seat cover. The whole time over more than half my closet filled with the clothes I used to wear just hang collects dust. That doesn't mean I don't have the occasional Hershey's bar or brownie, it's ok to "cheat" once in awhile, if you don't you wont stick to it.
  • Caperfae
    Caperfae Posts: 433
    I don't have 2 voices in my head ... the other voice I'm hearing is from the gingerbread house that's been sitting on my kitchen table since Monday ... which as of today is missing EIGHT jelly beans.

    It's not an easy battle to lose weight at all. I am constantly having to evaluate my food choices and second guessing meals. It gets tiring .. FAST.
    Working out comes easy for me luckily because I love the energy burst I get through the rest of the day.
  • kjensen15
    kjensen15 Posts: 398 Member
    You are definitely not the only one that feels this way. I'm sure you've heard the quote, "Nothing tastes as good as being skinny feels" but I've changed it to "Nothing tastes as good as being HEALTHY feels!" I can definitely feel a difference when I'm eating well and excercising versus eating anything I want without regard and being lazy. So just always try to keep in mind how good you really feel when you're eating right or if that doesn't work remember how icky you feel after indulging in some greasy, fatty, sugary foods! :happy:
  • angisnee
    angisnee Posts: 236 Member
    You definitely are not alone. What helped me get through the toughest times was making very tiny goals and making good decisions one at a time. One tiny goal I had was to plan breakfast and a snack and stick with that. Then I'd plan lunch and a snack. Then dinner. Each meal/snack felt like a reward for sticking with my plan, and I would have many small successes at the end of the day to celebrate. A side effect of the planning was that I learned a lot about the protein, calcium, sodium, etc. content of the food I was eating, and all that knowledge now helps me make good decisions without so much planning.

    Each day presents different struggles. You have the power to choose how you'll react to things in your life, including that nasty little voice. Just make one good decision at a time and reward yourself (in non-food ways of course) for all your hard work. Remember that the only way one bad decision can ruin everything is if you give up afterwards. If you slip up, accept it, learn from it, and continue on! You can do it, and it is totally worth it!
  • lutzsher
    lutzsher Posts: 1,153 Member
    You are definately NOT alone in this feeling. I combat it by having some "bad" stuff sometimes, but ONLY one or two bites. You cannot completely deny yourself of everything, especially if it is a craving that will haunt you for days . . . but you can just have one taste and walk away . . . knowing that you are not denying yourself, but are aware of the implications.

    I had a huge craving for something last night . . . something comforting and "bad". I decided to make my Splenda banana nut bread recipe. I had one small slice (112 calories) and now my husband will get to have it in his lunches for the week.

    My biggest craving is beer . . . so I will have a light one on occasion just to satisfy myself that I am NOT on a diet and can enjoy the occasional treat.

    I also have a cupboard FULL of herbal tea. When I want something I shouldn't I often grab a cup of tea as the smell of it often makes a craving go away . . . chocolate mint, gingerbread spice, peppermint, berry flavors . . . your sense of smell is a powerful thing so this often will work, sipping on a calorie free herbal cup of tea that just smells decadent!
  • sweetbn
    sweetbn Posts: 318
    It is okay to feel this way... I think we all do. I don't deprive myself of anything. If I crave it, I have it. You name it. Cookies, cake, pizza (especially pizza), wings, burgers... I just now do it healthier. ONE cookie instead of 10 (I only even bake 5 or 6 to prevent this [my husband eats the rest]) or have one to two slices of pizza (2 is still 600 calories) and I always can have enough calories left.

    The day after my birthday I was sooooo hung over; we went to Waffle House and I had an all-star grand slam. Well if you don't know what that is, its like 3 slices bacon, huge waffle, several eggs, toast, hashbrowns... anyway I think it was like 1600 calories not including the syrup. Anyway I ran like 8 miles that day and I still ended up being under my calories. Not that I would do that everyday but hey it was a special occasion and this is life. :)
  • Mindful_Trent
    Mindful_Trent Posts: 3,954 Member
    One more thought - if you find that your "new lifestyle" is incredibly difficult and something you probably couldn't stick to, then maybe you are being too strict? I allow myself "treats" like ice cream or hot chocolate or something like that in moderation, when it fits into my plan. Certain things I'm trying to avoid as much as possible (processed foods, added sugars, etc.) but even then, I know it's not realistic to think I'll be perfect.

    Another thought is that you could be trying to change too much too fast. It took me over a year to get to where I'm at now - If I had tried to make all the changes at once, I would've totally given up. Baby steps and focusing on one change at a time are key to making new habits last.
  • bucky17h
    bucky17h Posts: 120
    DON'T EVER FEEL LIKE YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WITH THIS PROBLEM.

    I struggle EVERY single day with that other voice in my head. One little thing that helps me out in a big way is to allow myself one day out of every week to just eat whatever and however much of stuff that I want. It helps to keep me on track on the other days, because I see it as a reward for being so good, and it doesn't negatively affect my weight loss.

    Yes I have that voice too - I pick myself up if I stray and get back on track. My health is worth the effort and I know I have been eating so much healthier and conscious of my food choices since joining MFP
  • NoAdditives
    NoAdditives Posts: 4,251 Member
    This is why I give myself the weekends off. I don't go to the gym and I don't worry about sticking to my calorie goal. It doesn't do any damage to your long term goals and it keeps you sane!
  • I listen to podcasts, use visualisations of myself looking lean and eat cement to keep the negative thoughts at bay.
  • jsecret
    jsecret Posts: 606 Member
    I'm right there with you sweetie. :( As much as I *love* losing the weight and feeling/looking better there's still that part of me that HATES that I will have to continue this my entire life. I want the ability to lose weight and then go back to eating whatever whenever without risking gaining that all back.

    I hate that I put myself in this situation. I hate that I have such lack of control over eating on a normal basis.

    The whole thing sucks. As much as calorie counting, eating healthy, exercising regularly, etc is helpful and a great part of life it still sucks.

    Just keep your chin up girly, we're here for you :) and we're all in the same boat.
  • curtm97982
    curtm97982 Posts: 5 Member
    I've been trying to loose weight for most of my life without much success. I would start strong but would loose focus and give up. But that changed over the last year. I quit focusing on loosing weight and started looking at the reasons I want to loose the weight. One of the people I care deeply about loves to ride horses, but I can never participate because I weigh too much. My grandkids love to hike, but I can't because I weigh too much. There are so many things I want to do, but my weight gets in the way so now I focus on those things and not my weight. Food and my weight went from comfortable friends to enemies that keep me from the things I desire. A proper diet and exercise is no longer a goal in itself, they are simply things I need to do on my way to my goals. If I focus on the weight then I grow weary because there will always be more to loose and I will never “get there”. When I focus on the things I want to do I stay motivated as I reach each goal. I use the food log here to tell me how much to eat, since my “stomach” lies to me about when I’ve had enough. But hitting a calorie number is no longer a goal, just something I do on my way to a place I want to go.
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    I listen to podcasts, use visualisations of myself looking lean and eat cement to keep the negative thoughts at bay.
    Hahaha! :bigsmile: Thanks for the laugh!

    This journey is 90% mental and 10% GETTING IT DONE. If you aren't ready to commit and be an active participant in getting healthy and being fit, then you are not going to be successful here. The cold, hard truth!

    Good luck.
  • hooah_mj
    hooah_mj Posts: 1,004 Member
    I have 2 Aces in my pocket, 1st I hate to WASTE $$, so you'll seldom find me at any fast food joints, esp Starbucks.

    2nd, Diabetes is not particular of persons & I refuse to entertain that notion. Naturally, there's an endless list of self-inflicted diseases...

    I'lve learned to like working out and drinking a lot water, but I really love the energy I have, not to mention the clothes I can wear :tongue: Figure out what makes you tick....
  • chelekaz
    chelekaz Posts: 847 Member
    Honey I just had that fight an hour ago. I was getting my son and I our afternoon snacks. He had chocolate milk and a homemade pb choc chip cookie from grandma's house. As I stood there cutting up my orange and weighing my grapes, I was thinking that I would seriously give my right arm to for chocolate... the problem was I wasn't thinking about one cookie ... no the container of icing that is sitting in our downstairs pantry because my step daughter wanted it to make brownies (and didnt) when she was here this weekend. Ultimately, I settled for a bite of Wyatt's cookie and made the choice to eat my orange and grapes.

    But... it's tough and some days the healthy voice does not win out. But, I'm learning that it is okay to fall... as long you pick yourself back up. Like someone else said, we cannot give you the motivation and the will to want this ... but.... we can give you support, guidance and maybe, just maybe ... that little extra desire to kick that unwanted room mate out of your brain.
  • Please don't give up! Today is my 3rd day and I am feeling great today, but I know my day will come too and if you and others quit it makes my will harder to stay too. Makes my brain start thinking how hard it is but we have to be strong! You will be fine and tomorrow is another day. Be sure to have a cheat day and not feel guilty for it! Hope you are feeling better soon!
  • yellowfairy
    yellowfairy Posts: 207 Member
    Don't give up. I have been there-have been there for the past few years. I just got tired of wanting to look different, and decided instead of complaining about it-I would actually do something about it. It has been three weeks for me, and wow is that naughty voice, naughty! The other day it convinced me to have a frosty at Wendys! But....right after that-I felt so guilty that I now realize-the self hate isn't worth even that cheating.

    I know that I will eat bad things and will probably mess up-but hey-it's a journey, not an overnight thing. I know that it didn't take me three weeks to get this size, so I sure can't lose it in three weeks!

    You CAN DO THIS! CHIN UP! Just think of how awesome you are going to look and feel!
  • mrsbuzz
    mrsbuzz Posts: 576 Member
    Thanks Everyone for your kind words and lots of encouragement. You guys are the best....it is just what I need to keep going. I know I am a complainer but sometimes it helps to just vent and then you guys are there to encourage me and that's what keeps me going.

    Again thanks to all you let a kind word!!
  • rachelblank427
    rachelblank427 Posts: 180 Member
    Just remember that its not 1 day of eating bad that is going to make you gain weight its eating bad everyday. When I start feeling bad about eating healthy and wanting to quit, I go a head and allow myself to eat something "bad". Usually its enough to get me back on track.

    Also this is not a "diet" its a lifestyle change, allow your self treats every now and again...
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