Loosing weigh is depressing

Hi all

I am a 28 year old who has made it her goal to loose weight this year, however that is WAY easier said than done! quite frankly loosing weight is just plain depressing for me! So, if you can offer any advice etc I would be more than happy to hear it!

Thanks
Ange
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Replies

  • Hello

    What about it makes you depressed? I am excited about losing weight. What is your motivation?
  • Chezzie84
    Chezzie84 Posts: 873 Member
    If you find it depressing you are doing it all wrong. What makes it depressing for you?
  • blbinek1
    blbinek1 Posts: 10 Member
    I'm 48, have the same issue. I find dieting/ new way of life sooo frustrating and also depressing. I've had a weight problem for many years, I loose heaps, feel great for short period of time before I start gaining a little, next thing I know I'm back to where I started ... Am I out of control ... Possibly. Am I unusual ... No. I know what to do, what to cut out, exercise blah blah blah .. Does that stop me being in this predicament. Do I enjoy being fat? Definitely No.
  • Samstan101
    Samstan101 Posts: 699 Member
    I can only say what worked for me. Firstly I needed to identify why I was fat (and I don't mean work out I ate more than I burned!). Why did I eat what I ate and when did I eat it. What were my triggers both in terms of food I couldn't say no to and also emotions or events that made me binge. Then I really thought about why I wanted to lose weight other than just I was fat. I worked out that actually I wanted to be fitter, much fitter! And the best way of achieveing this was exercising and exercising is easier and less painful if I get lighter at the same time.

    Once I had these straight I could formulate a way of eating & living that was a lifestyle change and not a diet. This meant I had to make sure I wasn't hungry and didn't feel deprived. The first was done by making sure I ate enough calories even if that meant my weight loss was slower (it took me 15 years to put the weight on so if it takes me 2-3 years to lose it then I'm doing well). Secondly it means that I aloow myself some treats within my calorie goal and occasionally I'll have a day where I don't log. I won't pig out and gorge myself but I will eat what I want.

    This has made it much easier and seeing my measurements shrink, the scales go down as my running speed increases and I can lift more weight means its not depressing. Most of the time its great! Occasionally I'll have a bad day but try not to make that a day of bad eating, I just try to address the feelings and use some good friends here as support.

    So why do you want to lose weight? Why does it depress you? Find something that works for you and look forward to the new life ahead. :)
  • ktsmom430
    ktsmom430 Posts: 1,100 Member
    Please know that you can do this! Use MFP and all the great people here to get all of the support and help that you want or need.

    Most people can lose weight if there are no medical issues. You have to eat at a calorie deficit. Simple but not easy.

    It is hard losing weight. When you start seeing the results of the work you are doing it will inspire you to keep going!

    It is way more depressing to be overweight.

    For me, this is a lifestyle change. The way I will have to eat for the rest of my life.
  • HaibaneReki
    HaibaneReki Posts: 373 Member
    the most depressing part for me is having friends who struggle to GAIN weight. For a guy who started from scratch at 104kg and no good exercise/eating habbits it's pretty hard to live from 1800 cals a day. Always eating to 80% satisfaction sucks, but I noticed that my stomach actually shrunk a little so that makes it easier. It's also good to wait a little before eating seconds - it takes the brain a moment to realize you're already full.

    People are noticing the difference and that's very encouraging, one just has to filter the smirks about logging food. But with Megane Fox I say "*kitten*'em" I'm losing and that's the new me! :tongue:
  • Velum_cado
    Velum_cado Posts: 1,608 Member
    What depresses you? Is it how you eat, working out, changes to your body, letting go of old habits, losing a source of comfort, changes to the social aspects of eating, less sugar...?

    You can do it, you just have to... do it. Make it part of your routine. The longer you do something, the more it becomes habit, which makes it so much easier. Seeing those results can be motivating, too!
  • Too depressed to reply....
  • florentinovillaro
    florentinovillaro Posts: 342 Member
    Get in some exercise and adequate rest. The depression will disappear.
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,861 Member
    Hi all

    I am a 28 year old who has made it her goal to lose weight this year, however that is WAY easier said than done!
    True. That's why there are so many people who don't do it. It's not easy.

    When you say "depressing" I don't know if you mean that as a figure of speech or literally. Exercise of any kind can be helpful in alleviating mild depression.
  • parkscs
    parkscs Posts: 1,639 Member
    It sounds to me that you're depressed when you think about your weight and your weight loss track record, rather than losing weight being depressing. If what you've done in the past hasn't worked, you need to do an honest assessment and try to figure out why. If you were going hungry or not enjoying certain foods, find a way to factor those into your routine. If you hate exercising, realize you can lose weight through diet alone (although exercise is certainly good for your health). Don't try to do too much all at once and keep your focus on the long-term. If you can find a way to enjoy the weight loss process (eating good foods, not going hungry, etc.), I think it really increases your chances of sticking with it and having success.
  • lambchoplewis1
    lambchoplewis1 Posts: 156 Member
    I can understand the depression. It is not really a depression but a loss of an old friend "lots of food"!! I think the word depression is used for an overall feeling. For me it is a loss. I think it is like a divorce, death or any other major life event. This is a major change and it is forever. So, at first it is hard. You get mad that you can't just eat what you want and be at a weight you want. Then sad that this is what it will always be. Then you go day by day and soon, the light shows back up and success hits. Sure, there will be days when you remember the good old days (not so good but the memory is good). A smell, a place you used to go to, people etc.

    You can do this and work through these stages of grief!!! Just a thought.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    the most depressing part for me is having friends who struggle to GAIN weight. For a guy who started from scratch at 104kg and no good exercise/eating habbits it's pretty hard to live from 1800 cals a day. Always eating to 80% satisfaction sucks, but I noticed that my stomach actually shrunk a little so that makes it easier. It's also good to wait a little before eating seconds - it takes the brain a moment to realize you're already full.

    People are noticing the difference and that's very encouraging, one just has to filter the smirks about logging food. But with Megane Fox I say "*kitten*'em" I'm losing and that's the new me! :tongue:

    You seem like someone who might do well with Intermittent Fasting. You might want to look it up.
  • shaynepoole
    shaynepoole Posts: 493 Member
    Is it easy - no

    Is it worth it - yes

    I was pretty comfortable with 340 lb me until I started having issues just moving around (I had other issues due to the additional weight that I had just dealt with - like diabetes/high blood pressure/etc) Once moving around became a problem, I made this change

    Yes there were days that I wanted to give up and lose sight of what I was trying to do - but now? At almost 1/2 my original size, it is so totally totally worth it... at 42, I feel better than ever.

    I don't know how much you are trying to lose, but you need to factor in what you are hoping to accomplish and keep in mind that it is doable
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    If you find it depressing you are doing it all wrong. What makes it depressing for you?

    this!
  • Zimgales
    Zimgales Posts: 2 Member
    Hi everybody?!?!?! Wow, thank you for the response.... Firstly the thing that is most discouraging is I am miserable because I am hungry - I do not have that full satisfied feeling after eating a meal. i try really hard to be good i.e cereal and fruit for breakfast, half of my normal portion for lunch and a very small dinner, plus two other fruit items in between - I drink loads of water and i only have one cup of coffee with sugar in it a day. I love food and mostly i Love my husbands cooking and this whole thing just totally sucks! I've been over weight for most of my life but I seem totally incapable of getting below 104kg! I walk every day with my dogs (and I mean a long walk - 4 holes of a golf course to be exact) I work long hours and don't have the moeny to join a gym so I do my best at home - managed a 30 minute run the other day and guess what I lost a whole 100g!!!!!! Right rant over but once again sheesh guys thank you for the responses!!!! xox
  • hopefaithlove24
    hopefaithlove24 Posts: 454 Member
    Instead of thinking of all the weight you have to get rid of, think about what you're going to look/feel like when you're done! That's what motivates me, and is far from depressing:)
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Hi everybody?!?!?! Wow, thank you for the response.... Firstly the thing that is most discouraging is I am miserable because I am hungry - I do not have that full satisfied feeling after eating a meal. i try really hard to be good i.e cereal and fruit for breakfast, half of my normal portion for lunch and a very small dinner, plus two other fruit items in between - I drink loads of water and i only have one cup of coffee with sugar in it a day. I love food and mostly i Love my husbands cooking and this whole thing just totally sucks! I've been over weight for most of my life but I seem totally incapable of getting below 104kg! I walk every day with my dogs (and I mean a long walk - 4 holes of a golf course to be exact) I work long hours and don't have the moeny to join a gym so I do my best at home - managed a 30 minute run the other day and guess what I lost a whole 100g!!!!!! Right rant over but once again sheesh guys thank you for the responses!!!! xox

    let me guess, you're set on 1200 cals!?
  • bethcondon
    bethcondon Posts: 12 Member
    Hi, I'm just starting MFP myself, but I wanted to say that maybe making different goals will help motivate you, rather than finding it depressing. I've "bitten off more than I can chew" so many times (like with New Years Resolutions), and end up being overwhelmed and quitting. MFP is a LOT to do all at once (being committed to logging your calories), but it can also be very rewarding and help motivate you. You don't have to use MFP, though.

    I will say that I started with exercise, because I am battling depression myself. My goal was not to lose weight or get fit, but to feel better. I needed to improve my mood and my energy, so I could be productive, happy, and a good parent. To me, that is much more motivating than losing weight (after all, I am a mom, not sure if that bikini body is ever coming back... we will see!).

    So my initial goal was just to exercise every day. Get the heart rate up for 30 minutes. I made it part of my daily routine. I try to do it in the morning so it's "done". I feel good because of the exercise endorphins, but also because I've accomplished something hard that day. Then I started logging my exercise on MFP. Then I started logging my calories. I'm not obsessive about it, but it keeps me "aware" of what I'm eating, so I can make better choices. I save up lots of my calories for the evening, because I am an evening snacker. (By the way, air-popped POPCORN!)

    I hope this helps. Feel free to message me if you want to talk! I haven't lost much weight yet, but am seeing a difference in my body.
  • Lives2Travel
    Lives2Travel Posts: 682 Member
    Unless you are suffering from true clinical depression, what you're experiencing is more likely a Pity Party. Yes, it does suck that you can no longer eat what you want when you want. It sucks that some people appear to have an easier time at maintaining a reasonable weight. But, what sucks more is the long list of health issues that being overweight can cause in the long run.

    I'm 8+ months into this and I can say that if you persist and see results the "Poor Me" feelings will be replaced with "Go Me!" feelings of accomplishment and better health. So hang in there. It does get easier.
  • christa279
    christa279 Posts: 222 Member
    Hi everybody?!?!?! Wow, thank you for the response.... Firstly the thing that is most discouraging is I am miserable because I am hungry - I do not have that full satisfied feeling after eating a meal. i try really hard to be good i.e cereal and fruit for breakfast, half of my normal portion for lunch and a very small dinner, plus two other fruit items in between - I drink loads of water and i only have one cup of coffee with sugar in it a day. I love food and mostly i Love my husbands cooking and this whole thing just totally sucks! I've been over weight for most of my life but I seem totally incapable of getting below 104kg! I walk every day with my dogs (and I mean a long walk - 4 holes of a golf course to be exact) I work long hours and don't have the moeny to join a gym so I do my best at home - managed a 30 minute run the other day and guess what I lost a whole 100g!!!!!! Right rant over but once again sheesh guys thank you for the responses!!!! xox

    Hi! I would be discouraged if I was hungry all the time too! Are you logging what you eat here on MFP? Are you weighing your food? What is your calorie goal?

    The reason I ask is that I started out trying to eat at a ridiculously (for me) low calorie amount and I was hungry. I was also eating what I saw as diet foods. They just weren't filling me up! Once I plugged everything into MFP and read some of the "Getting Started" sticky posts, everything made a lot more sense.

    It took me a bit to learn proper portion sizes and about the kinds of foods that are filling and satisfying. I also found that I do better if I don't deny myself certain foods. I am always going to love baked goods, ice cream, etc., so I eat them and just make sure they fit into my calorie goal for the day. There are days that I go over, but in the scheme of a week I am still in a deficit and weight loss is happening for me!

    I love food too, and I cook all the time. Losing weight doesn't have to be depressing. I'm finding it quite liberating!
  • LRoslin
    LRoslin Posts: 128
    deleted, duplicate
  • LRoslin
    LRoslin Posts: 128
    Hi everybody?!?!?! Wow, thank you for the response.... Firstly the thing that is most discouraging is I am miserable because I am hungry - I do not have that full satisfied feeling after eating a meal. i try really hard to be good i.e cereal and fruit for breakfast, half of my normal portion for lunch and a very small dinner, plus two other fruit items in between - I drink loads of water and i only have one cup of coffee with sugar in it a day. I love food and mostly i Love my husbands cooking and this whole thing just totally sucks! I've been over weight for most of my life but I seem totally incapable of getting below 104kg! I walk every day with my dogs (and I mean a long walk - 4 holes of a golf course to be exact) I work long hours and don't have the moeny to join a gym so I do my best at home - managed a 30 minute run the other day and guess what I lost a whole 100g!!!!!! Right rant over but once again sheesh guys thank you for the responses!!!! xox

    Try adding protein to your breakfast. I eat cereal every morning but on top of Greek yogurt (2 percent or nonfat) and I add berries. The protein keeps me going.

    You may have your weight loss goal set too high per week, and therefore your calories that MFP is giving you are too low. Try setting it for losing 1 pound a week, or 1.5, if you have it at 2 pounds a week.

    You can ramp up your exercise at home with DVDs like Walk Away the Pounds--that way the weather is never an excuse. Exercise really helps with depression and mood, at least it does for me.
  • pkw58
    pkw58 Posts: 2,038 Member
    Wow! Thanks for the very honest post. I can tell you I found it depressing for two decades until I had the moment that said enough was enough. I think the game changer of me is when I decided I didn't have to go to the gym or run every day to lose and maintain weight. Whomever invented the fitbit or the pedometer and started the 10,000 step movement, thank you! I would love to say I have time to get rock hard abs, etc but the truth is I have 15-30 minutes a day for yoga or barre3 at my home and then I walk and stand as much as possible during the day and use my nike fuel band to count the calorie burn. There is something about getting more movement that allows me to sleep more. Go figure, huh?

    More sleep, brighter attitude. Brighter attitude, easier to diet. Drink more water, less tired brain, less tired brain, easier to make good food choices. You don't have to learn all the new healthy habits at once, but it is really amazing how one good habit begets another.

    I think improving one's mental health is the most misunderstood thing in the world. And worth a visit to a reliable doctor to discuss your level of depression to make sure you don't have a medical issue as well. But for me, it was just making sure I was doing all I could holistically that got me here.
  • So I have had this problem with standard diets that focus on low fat and moderate to high carbohydrates. I always felt hungry and as a result depressed. I switched to a high fat low carb diet and have had zero problems with depression due to not feeling satiated. Due to the high fat and moderate protein I am always full and I lose the desire to snack. Before you, or anyone else, claims that a ketogenic diet will lead to heart disease I urge you to do just a bit of research. My cholesterol and blood sugar levels were on the high side of normal but they have dropped significantly. It is now on the low side of normal. I am approaching 70lbs lost with barely any effort. I highly recommend checking out the reddit sub-forum:

    http://www.reddit.com/r/keto/search?q=keto&sort=relevance&restrict_sr=on&t=all
  • mikeschratz
    mikeschratz Posts: 253 Member
    There's a place here on MFP that I go to to get motivated, inspired and look forward to what I can do,
    I love this one
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1199314-i-forgot-how-fat-i-used-to-be-found-an-old-photo

    There is so much motivation, inspiration and support here for me. When I think about losing 60 lbs, that depresses me. But when I think about losing 5 lbs 12 times, that give me motivation.

    It was suggested to me to make small goals, work towards them, no matter how slow or how fast... it just don't matter, as long as I am working towards them.

    Good luck in finding your niche and getting healthier.
  • walterm852
    walterm852 Posts: 409 Member
    Hi all

    I am a 28 year old who has made it her goal to loose weight this year, however that is WAY easier said than done! quite frankly loosing weight is just plain depressing for me! So, if you can offer any advice etc I would be more than happy to hear it!

    Thanks
    Ange

    Ange, it sure can be depressing, I have just learned when it comes to something like this, to jump all in.

    Half measures avail nothing, jump in for 90 days. Just make a deal with yourself to be true to the counts for that time period. It will be a learning process. You can do it
  • That "full" feeling comes with time. At first I never felt full but it's because for years my idea of full was completely stuffed. I remember thinking I never felt full at the start too, but honestly I hardly ever think that anymore, it's one of the things that have just changed with time. You can do this. Be happy for every little accomplishment (that you stuck to your cals for the day (or meal if you are really struggling), any day you exercise give yourself credit (instead of focusing on the days you DON"T exercise and making yourself feel bad) and be happy for any weight loss---even if it's 1/2 lb and you feel you deserve more. It really does get better. My weight loss is super slow (25.5 lbs in 5 months) but I told myself at the start of this that it would take me 2 years to lose my weight and even though that sucked, it's helped me not give up. I will be THRILLED if I am at my goal weight a year and a half from now....instead of starting over even bigger a year and a half from now because I gave up because the weight wasn't coming off fast enough. Good luck!
  • pwittek10
    pwittek10 Posts: 723 Member
    It is depressing to me due to so much of our social life is around food.
    It is very hard to go to dinner and not eat the wrong foods. Also the time frame of going out.
    I do not eat after 5:30, going out is is always after my cut off time.
    I made my goal almost 2 years ago and my weight is up 20 pounds now. I only want to loose 10, I got way to skinny.
    It is very hard!
  • Helloitsdan
    Helloitsdan Posts: 5,564 Member
    Hows your sleep?
    Hows your monthly cycles?
    Are you taking any high quality fish oil?

    On my phone for the rest of the day, if you need insight into my questions, PM.