Do you ever wonder, why bother?

Let me tell you something.... I never had a problem with being extra overweight because I am tall ( max was like 25 lbs on my 6 feet and 4 inches over normal range). Being thiner just gives me more confidence, have more energy, better sleep... And the biggest benefit of exercise that it has on my mind. College or job can make you that you "forget" on physical activity and if this happens over longer period of time it can make you depressed ( I know it did me). You feel like a old man even if you are in your early 20`s and that is the worst feeling ever. Physical activity just makes me feel like I am 17 again and it is making me happy. For some people benefit can be number on scale, but for me is my state of mind.

Being thinner is not going to bring insta-happiness. So no, that's not probably going to happen.

But if you're torturing yourself, being hungry and miserable, that sounds pretty unhappy too.

Here's my take. I don't eat anything I don't like (except this one hummus sandwich experiment-yuk). I don't ever feel guilty for eating (not even days when I eat 5-10k cal or more). I only do exercise I enjoy. None of that is torture or misery.

What I've given up? Inability to walk through a store without leaning on a cart for support. Inability to walk up the stairs. Being too weak to carry the groceries in the house. Having never gone on a bike ride with my son (who is 23). Clothes with an X in the size. Never having run a road race. Having to check the weight limits for chairs/ladders/etc.

Is it worth it to eat 1 less cookie? Or to have a salad instead a double whopper for lunch? Or to go for a run? Or a bike ride?

Absolutely. My life has completely transformed. I live a different life entirely. I have gone on a bike ride with my son. I have run road races. I wear clothes in a size 6. I fit in airplane seats.

And that's an absolutely fair trade for eating healthier most (but not all) of the time and getting some exercise.

So yes-it's worth it.

This is perfect timing for me to actually reflect on the very subject - so here I go!

For me it is worth it because I started this with the intention of being healthier, getting off of High Blood Pressure medication for several reasons. 1) It starts with one pill, then they add another pill to counter-act the side effects of the first pill and then one day you have a large pill caddy full of a variety pills - all for your health, 2) my copay went up this year (as it does most) and 3) the cost for prescriptions is crazy high.

Some of the side effects of that decision are:
I feel better
I look better to society (I go back and forth on the for myself)
My attitude is much better
I can enter a room and not feel like the largest person in the room
And, many other daily positive occurrences that are a result of my weight loss.

Yet, I still wonder at times was it worth it, usually when I see how people react to me in such a positive way as opposed to before, it's like society has a grey area where you matter more, outside on either side and your worth goes way down

The thought that we will be happy when we reach our goal is a mirage, to appear for a fleeting moment only to disapear when reality sets in. Do we really know of anyone that is totally happy with their body!

Life on Life's Terms!

I see my aging relatives and friends, with their little plastic pill boxes full of pills to take throughout the day. With their walkers, glucose meters, canes, several Dr. visits a month, oxygen, wheelchairs, shots... I visit them in the hospital after they've had another artery opened. I listen to them complain about how hard it is to walk up one flight of stairs, or lift a 5 lb bag of sugar.

I know why I bother. I don't torture myself, but I bother for a reason.

well you have to love yourself where you are now.. or nothing will change. like u said back then u thought u were fat. i know thats not easy. as for my personal journey..

its totally worth it!

but then again i was morbidly obese. i dont "diet". i eat whatever i want within calories. i dont watch my macros and all that. im trying (& getting there) with trying to not feel guilty over food. only good things have come from everything here.

and why torture yourself? thats negative. thats gonna bring u down. build yourself up. if its exercise that seems like torture then find something you love that will burn some calories. if its food.. try new things or healthyier options for something thats "bad" that you miss so much.

I see my aging relatives and friends, with their little plastic pill boxes full of pills to take throughout the day. With their walkers, glucose meters, canes, several Dr. visits a month, oxygen, wheelchairs, shots...

This is so true. I love my dad, but man, he really let himself go, starting in his 30's. He was blessed with an incredible body but abused it. He used to play baseball with and sometimes against Mickey Mantle in the minor leagues. But to be honest, he just wanted to sit in his chair and watch tv. Now he can hardly get around. Like I said, I love my pop but abused his body so much to the point there's so many things he can no longer do and hasn't been able to do for years.

All of the "torture" and "guilt" just doesn't happen for me, I guess. I go at my own pace, and as long as I'm losing, no matter how slowly, I count it as progress towards my goal. I think I will be happier when I get to where I want to be, and that's not to say that I'm unhappy now but there are things I focus on about my body at this weight that I'm looking forward to not noticing anymore.

What I've been thinking about is how much we beat ourselves up in during the weight loss process. Until we get to the understanding that with food there is not a right or wrong, not a good or bad, not should or shouldn't, we will continue to encourage our negative self-talk. It is time to recognize that we are human. Our energy is much better spent accepting ourselves and doing some analysis about the actual circumstances in which we find ourselves. Instead of telling ourselves:

"I totally screwed up. I ate the whole carton of ice cream (or the whole bag of chips, or the entire chocolate cake, or the extra serving of dinner...). I might as well just give up and realize that I'm always going to be fat. I've been so bad, and have eaten so much, I might as well forget this whole diet thing. I'm weak, and I suck."

Really? Do you believe you deserve to be berated like that for over eating? Would you say the same to someone else if they behaved the same way you just did? Not likely. Instead of looking at it as being bad, or doing wrong, we need to look at our actions and say, wow. That is not what I meant to do. Now that it has happened let me think about a few things.

1) why did I do that? Are you eating because you're bored? Are you an emotional eater? Are you punishing yourself for something else?
2) what made my actions possible? Is there too much junk food in the house? Are there no better choices available? Are you dipping into the kid's snacks?
3) how can I create a different outcome in the future? Can I agree that I won't take food out of my child's mouth anymore? Can I choose different foods the next time I go grocery shopping? Can I decide not to eat unless I'm sitting at the kitchen or dining room table?
4) what can I do differently if the circumstances repeat themselves? Was my behavior the only possible reaction to the situation? What other options did I have? Did I think about stopping but couldn’t find the strength?

You don't suck. You didn't ruin the rest of your life. Sure you didn't make the best choice, but how many people do you know who always makes the best choices? If you're honest with yourself and spend some time thinking about why you made poor choices, you may discover that you learn something deeper about yourself and your relationship with food. You might discover that you have to work a bit harder or focus a bit more to move forward with improving your food selections. You might even find out that you do have better motivations for losing weight than you knew. Introspection is a powerful tool.

Good luck in your journey.