Suffering from health problems...need motivation

Smokey19
Smokey19 Posts: 796 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hi, my name is Kimberlee, 50. I have been suffering recently with pneumonia, broken rib and hypotension. How do I stay motivated when everything seems to be going wrong? It's been one problem after another, health-wise, and stress on top of all of that, too. My parents moved to an independent living facility 1 1/2 yrs. ago because my parents are physically disabled and my dad has alzheimer's disease. Now, my parents are considering moving back home and I will be their primary care-giver because I, too, am disabled and am unable to work. I will have to do the cleaning and cooking, and take care of my dad who is occasionally incontinent of bowel and bladder. I don't think that I can do it all. I haven't asked my girlfriend, but maybe she can help out also. Where they live now is 23 miles away, and when they move home they will live across the cornfiend from me, so they will at least I will be close when they call. My brother said that he can help one day a week and my sister can help one day a week...but only for a few hours each day. Oh, my, I don't know how not to emotional eat when everything is a mess in my life. I need help, please!!!!

Replies

  • Barbonica
    Barbonica Posts: 337 Member
    I am so sorry about your situation. My mother died of Alzheimer's.; it is a terrible disease.

    You have to take care of yourself. Be realistic as to your parents needs and your ability to provide for them. There are usually support groups, case workers, and visiting nurse agencies that can give you information and help balance these things. Get help from them.

    I knows it might seem harsh, but I saw this with my father caring for my mother. At some point, the care needed is far more than any person can provide. Get some help and advice from those who are trained in these matters. The facility they are living in now would be a good place to start, they should be able to provide sources you can go to for advice.

    You might need to have a very difficult discussion with them and with your siblings about what you can do. Hang in there, healthy eating and some exercise will help you feel better and more able to cope. Best wishes to you and your family.
  • Smokey19
    Smokey19 Posts: 796 Member
    Thank you so much for your advice. My parent's house didn't sell and they can't afford to live in that facility and keep the house going, too. My brother and I understand and agree that this is the best decision for them at this time. My mom said that by moving home they can save up enough money to put dad in a nursing home when the time comes. I was a nurses aid and a nurse for years,so I know how those places work. I just hate the thought of putting him there. Right now I think that with assistance he can still live at home. A week ago we got him a hospital bed with upper rails so he has something to hold onto when he gets out of bed. But, I will need more help than only I can give him, I think. I will speak to my psychologist that I go to every week for depression and other problems.
  • Smokey19
    Smokey19 Posts: 796 Member
    Bump
  • Barbonica
    Barbonica Posts: 337 Member
    I am glad you have a support network to help you through this. One additional thought I found that helps me (may or may not be helpful for you). I always find when I am starting to feel overwhelmed that I need to have a plan. Once I have a plan, I can get through what needs to be gotten through. It doesn't have to be anything major - just something to hang my hat on. Maybe it is for you to make sure you start your day of healthy - with a walk or exercise video, a healthy breakfast, perhaps some meditation or yoga. Whatever can help you feel balanced. Maybe that is how you want to end your day. Make the commitment, and each day decide how you will keep that commitment. Maybe consider switching to maintenance for a while until your home life becomes a little more settled. Less pressure for weight loss.

    Congratulations on all you have achieved to date; you are rocking this!

    Again, best of luck to you!

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