Females and Fat-Acceptance Movement.

JamesRustler
JamesRustler Posts: 45 Member
Why does it seem that it's mostly women who are vocal about body acceptance, fat acceptance, and health at every size?

Every blog and website I visited on this topic were always written by women. Why is that? Why aren't more men involved with this?
«13

Replies

  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.
  • trojan_bb
    trojan_bb Posts: 699 Member
    Because men tell each other when they look fat and need to lose weight. No sugar coating.

    Go to any male dominated fitness forum. There are no niceties thrown around.
  • fitandfortyish
    fitandfortyish Posts: 194 Member
    Because men tell each other when they look fat and need to lose weight. No sugar coating.

    Go to any male dominated fitness forum. There are no niceties thrown around.

    :laugh: ...well put
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

    They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

    I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.
  • lightmouse
    lightmouse Posts: 175 Member
    Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

    They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

    I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.


    ^ well said :smile:
  • jaclync324
    jaclync324 Posts: 37 Member
    I think it's difficult to understand. Telling a woman that being unhealthy is bad doesn't always help. I feel that many women find themselves in situations where they are an afterthought. As caregivers, our first priorities are generally our children, our husbands, our homes, then ourselves. I speak from experience. Many times you find yourself with 9 hours left in a day and you should be sleeping for theoretically 8 of those hours.

    If you are like me, the sleep you get isn't always quality due to having little ones and you find yourself facing every day on empty. Sometimes it's nice to have someone say, make it through today, you are beautiful the way you are. I think many of these "pages" you reference were put up for that purpose alone.

    I will tell you though what finally got my *kitten* moving was Maria Kang. I realized that I had the right and duty to take an hour a day for myself. The thought that I am worth it and that my kids/husband would love me more for taking care of myself really got me motivated.
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

    They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive. I wish someone would have told me to get off my fat *kitten* long before I finally did. I could have used a rude awakening, and a kick in the right direction.

    I don't think it helps anyone to have an attitude of fat acceptance. It's like saying it's ok to shoot heroin or smoke cigarettes. It's not good for you, and it will kill you, eventually.

    I do agree with that when it comes to health issues. I don't like that people just want to say, "I'm fat and I can't help it, so everyone should just accept that." It's not a disability or a race or something, for most people, it's something that is entirely under your control. So it's tough to watch people do hurtful things to themselves and then want acceptance for that.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    I suspect it is the case that as an element of social status the issue of looks still affects women disproportionately more so than men so it is not unusual that more women blog about it than men.

    Having said that it has begun to impact on young men a lot more and I don't find it surprising to see an increase in eating disorders amongst this sector of the population.

    I completely support the intent behind HAES and fat acceptance although the interpretation of it which we see more of nowadays seems to have strayed from the original message.
  • AmazonRDH
    AmazonRDH Posts: 203 Member
    Possibly there is sooooo much more pressure on women to be thin, young-looking & beautiful and some women are standing up to say enough is enough.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    Possibly there is sooooo much more pressure on women to be thin, young-looking & beautiful and some women are standing up to say enough is enough.

    Stay young and beautiful if you want to be loved...

    I heard it in a song once so it must be true ;)
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Possibly there is sooooo much more pressure on women to be thin, young-looking & beautiful and some women are standing up to say enough is enough.

    It's not about being "young-looking and beautiful", and I think "thin" is the wrong term to use. It's about being at a healthy weight and not making excuses for overeating and living a sedentary lifestyle. The current argument for 'fat acceptance' is usually an in-your-face statement that makes it sound like having any issues with someone being overweight is some kind of discrimination. It's not discrimination when it's a choice. It may be a tough choice, but it's still a choice.
  • CharbyOttawa
    CharbyOttawa Posts: 49 Member
    I feel that many women find themselves in situations where they are an afterthought. As caregivers, our first priorities are generally our children, our husbands, our homes, then ourselves. I speak from experience. Many times you find yourself with 9 hours left in a day and you should be sleeping for theoretically 8 of those hours.

    If you are like me, the sleep you get isn't always quality due to having little ones and you find yourself facing every day on empty. Sometimes it's nice to have someone say, make it through today, you are beautiful the way you are.

    Preach, sister!

    I gained a boat-load of weight when I was running on empty. Food was my only solace, as I had an unsupportive partner and did everything in the house. I typically ran on 4-5 hours of sleep, worked a full-time job and a part-time one, was responsible for cooking/cleaning/child-rearing, etc... Exercise and taking care of myself were the last things on my long list of tasks. Usually, I was just too tired to take care of me.
  • sisterlilbunny
    sisterlilbunny Posts: 686 Member
    Huh. This also works with Eating Disorder Awareness week.

    The blogs I follow for "fat acceptance" is more of the type of yeah we're fat but why does that mean we have to be hidden away? Why do you think so many overweight people are afraid of the gym? Are we fat people supposed to avoid swimming because fit people are there and might be offended? Are we not supposed to go out to the clubs and enjoy ourselves because we jiggle?? Forget that, I may be fat but I'm still going to go out, have fun and get healthy. Your opinion of me doesn't make me who I am.

    Learning to accept yourself for who and what you are goes a LONG way in getting healthy.
  • echofm1
    echofm1 Posts: 471 Member
    I also don't think that it's all necessarily about fat acceptance, but accepting that you can be not perfect and still beautiful. When you look at magazines and models, it's hard to see that. They are literally the prettiest people in the world, and we see them on a daily basis. It can be hard to remember that you have beauty and value regardless of size, and that your imperfections make you a person.

    A lot of people seem to get into this either-or mentality regarding weight loss and body acceptance. I am fat still, despite my weight loss thus far. I still think I'm pretty and love my body, but that doesn't mean there aren't a variety of reasons I want to lose weight, and am losing weight. I loved myself before starting this journey, and love myself during it. I trust that I'll still love myself after it. And that's the kind of message that I think these ads are trying to send out. Accepting and enjoying the way you are right now doesn't negate the need or desire to change yourself in the future.
  • paygep
    paygep Posts: 401 Member
    While I am into loving my body at any size... I would still like for a significant portion of my body fat to GTFO.
  • Because men tell each other when they look fat and need to lose weight. No sugar coating.

    Go to any male dominated fitness forum. There are no niceties thrown around.

    Exactly this.

    And sometimes it breaks me a tiny bit somewhere in my heart when I see a lot of guys make fun of an overweight guy, who is just honestly trying to ask for help. And then the asker's profile/account becomes mysteriously abandoned after pages and pages of making fun of him. Same thing with guys that are really lean/skinny but lacking muscle mass, they're often accused of having eating disorders right off the bat. This compared to the female dominated forums, sooo different.

    I will admit, when I didn't have a profile picture (was new) on a different forum, some guys thought I was also a guy and basically made fun of me when I asked for help (I was 30-40 lbs heavier). When I uploaded pictures and added my gender on the other hand, I got some friend requests, encouragement, and actual "help". I'm not saying all guys do this (obv not the case), just from my experience, and some of my guy friends I know/lift with.
  • Sometimes, men put pressure on women saying they are fat slobs,or that we have undesireable bodies, a lot of men will say they don't want a fat lady, my ex-husband used to say a lot of ugly things about my weight and it made me miserable, a Jerk told me that before, and I was so hurt I could not workout for almost a month, I got so depressed and it's not like I wasn't already losing weight, so, society put's pressure on us to look thin and beautiful...
  • FTF2014
    FTF2014 Posts: 257 Member
    There is seriously more pressure on females to be thin or curvy and sexy. To be honest it really isn't fair but its true. Also females get made fun of by males and females more often than men when it comes to weight issues.
    EXAMPLE:

    A pilot only has to know how to fly a plane and he got the job. A female who want to be a stewardess needs to know how to be like a waitress and be thin. Even in today's era they can be fired for something else but the real reason was they got fat.
  • kluvit
    kluvit Posts: 435 Member
    While it is good to love yourself whatever your circumstance, the reality is that accepting your own fat will not improve your circumstance and is, in fact, counter to it. The reality is that people (especially women/especially aging women) are judged for being overweight. They are treated differently in professional settings and may be overlooked for promotion and salary increases as they are less likely to be respected/heard and to have influence in their workplace.

    http://business.time.com/2012/05/02/why-being-overweight-could-earn-you-a-lower-salary/
    http://www.forbes.com/sites/freekvermeulen/2011/03/22/the-price-of-obesity-how-your-salary-depends-on-your-weight/
    http://www.happy-healthy-vibrant.com/good-health-and-professional-success/
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    Give me a subject that doesn't involve testicles and the most vocal gender will always be female. End of story.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Why aren't more men involved with this?

    Because as a general rule men don't care if they are fat so they don't need to talk about accepting it. They already did.

    Furthermore, most the larger guys STILL think they are in much better shape then they really are.

    Annnnd, they also like to believe all women want them.

    But I digress.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    because women are expected to be thin, small , to take up less space
    because women are constantly bombarded with beauty standards, body standards, beauty expectations, body expectations
    women are made to feel unworthy, unloveable, less important if they do not fit that standard

    unlike men who if they are fat are made fun of sometimes yea sure but lets say you see a fat man with a really hot women...no one says anything really do they? just WAY TO GO MAN YAY YOU DESERVE IT

    now reverse that ...i bet you would not hear the same response

    women are at the forefront of fat acceptance because women are who need it the most , self love , self acceptance , fat acceptance

    im surprised that is not glaringly obvious , its kind of sad that its not
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member

    unlike men who if they are fat are made fun of sometimes yea sure but lets say you see a fat man with a really hot women...no one says anything really do they? just WAY TO GO MAN YAY YOU DESERVE IT

    No, we think either he is rolling in cash or has a kick *kitten* personality.
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
    EXACTLY WHAT SALEMBAMBI SAID.

    <3

    Perfect comment is perfect.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member

    unlike men who if they are fat are made fun of sometimes yea sure but lets say you see a fat man with a really hot women...no one says anything really do they? just WAY TO GO MAN YAY YOU DESERVE IT

    No, we think either he is rolling in cash or has a kick *kitten* personality.

    OH YOU ARE SO RIGHT OMG HOW SILLY OF ME

    ignore the point who cares eh
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    EXACTLY WHAT SALEMBAMBI SAID.

    <3

    Perfect comment is perfect.

    :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • Nobody has a right to criticize you for your size or physical appearance.

    However; "health at any size" is a head-in-the-sand statement. If you are obese, you are unhealthy, will have a shorter lifespan and are at risk of disease. That's just a reality. Whether you accept the reality or not doesn't change it.

    "Fat shaming" is wrong. Yes. It's wrong to be judgemental, critical, or hateful of anyone for the choices they make for themselves. You can be big and beautiful too, sure. Beauty isn't empirical. It's entirely up to the audience. But you are not healthy, and that's not "just who you are", you are the size you chose to be. That's just life.

    I think more people would be healthier if they realized two things. 1) It's not 'just the way you are'. Trust me, that was my excuse for many many years. You are obese because you eat too much and/or you eat unhealthy foods. It's just a reality. 2) It's okay to be obese. Sure! I agree, actually. It's perfectly fine, that's your choice. It's also fine to smoke, and go rock climbing without a harness. The difference is the latter two seem to admit the additional risks with those choices more often.

    Being born with freckles, dark skin, fair skin, 7 toes or 3 eyeballs are "genetics". Taking in too many calories and being obese is not "genetics". Says the formerly 330 lb man who was "big boned", "bad genes", and "slow metabolism" for way too long. When I finally decided I was fat I lost nearly 100 pounds (and counting).
  • Sovi_
    Sovi_ Posts: 575 Member
    Maybe men just aren't as judgemental and snarky? Women tend to judge each other, and themselves, physically more than men do.

    They should though. Fat isn't healthy or attractive.

    Says who??? I eat well, lift and run..... Shyt.... I am fabulous! Do I have to wait until I hit what society says is perfect before I like me?

    What is not attractive is laziness, complaining about weight while doing nothing about it. But will love my body now and when I get it to where I want it to be.
  • sentaruu
    sentaruu Posts: 2,206 Member
    while I consider myself to be somewhat of a smart *kitten*/jokester who takes things too far, I think that making fun of anyone for their appearance is wrong. Whether they are too skinny or too fat, it makes no difference, it is cruel and unwarranted. Is being fat healthy? hell no! is being fat "wrong"? I don't think so. do I think being fat should be "accepted/glorified"? no, it shouldn't. but I think that people should be accepted for who they are, and if they happen to be fat, so be it.
  • I prefer body acceptance and positivity to fat acceptance. My reasons for this are that body acceptance covers all body types, and fat acceptance promotes an unhealthy lifestyle in some cases.

    I support body positivity in combination with a healthy lifestyle- this means we can all be healthy mentally AND physically! :)