should morbidly obese children be taken from parents?

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Replies

  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    Not necessarily
    But maybe some counseling for all
    I never want to see kids taken from their families unless the situation can't be helped

    ^ this.... and knowing a bit about child protection laws in the UK, I really doubt that in any case morbid obesity was the *only* reason a child was taken into care. Maybe it was part of the reason The Daily Mirror isn't the most reliable source of information.

    removing a child from loving parents is extremely traumatic and likely to do more harm than good. Parents who are accidentally harming their kids (e.g. by overfeeding) should be educated. Parents who do nothing even when doctors and social services are telling them that their child is in danger of serious health problems if they don't change the child's diet, and when they're given help and support to be able to make those changes, then clearly there's other things wrong in the parent-child relationship and overfeeding is only a part of it.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    what a horrible thread.:indifferent:


    this is neither fun nor games:angry:

    Yes. But chit chat . . . Maybe not. Probably more mud slinging if this goes as I think it will
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I suspect that the logic behind this is that the parents lack the ability to control their child, and therefore, does not tell them "no" when they ask for food. I imagine these poor kids are now in homes with strangers and put on diets where they are denied food when they ask for it. Sounds harmless enough, but when a child is already thrown into an unfamiliar situation in which they have no idea what the future holds, denying them the solace of comfort food, the kid's mental health only becomes even more damaged. This is just not the way to address the issue.
  • mruntidy
    mruntidy Posts: 1,015 Member
    I don't agree they should be taken from the parents, after reading the article I also find that no one mentioned the elephant in the room which I would see as lazy parenting.

    It's depressing the amount of people here in the UK I hear say;

    'Fresh produce is too expensive' - no it's not, especially when you aren't spending x amount on Sky TV, cigarettes and alcohol
    'I don't know how to cook' - so learn, this is you and your child we are talking about

    Fresh produce and cooking whole foods and making it a family thing and a learned experience is a far better way of teaching portion control and dietary requirements than the resulting fall out from taking a child from his or her parents.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    No, foster homes and the CPS system are already overloaded here in the US. Also in before the lock.
    This 100%
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I don't agree they should be taken from the parents, after reading the article I also find that no one mentioned the elephant in the room which I would see as lazy parenting.

    It's depressing the amount of people here in the UK I hear say;

    'Fresh produce is too expensive' - no it's not, especially when you aren't spending x amount on Sky TV, cigarettes and alcohol
    'I don't know how to cook' - so learn, this is you and your child we are talking about

    Fresh produce and cooking whole foods and making it a family thing and a learned experience is a far better way of teaching portion control and dietary requirements than the resulting fall out from taking a child from his or her parents.

    I'm confused...

    Are you saying that the kids should be taken away? Or that the system should teach the parents about nutrition?
  • DaWayne360
    DaWayne360 Posts: 261 Member
    Actually I would like to see it taken a step farther than taking the kids away. Let’s work on prevention rather than a reaction. The majority of morbidly obese kids I see have morbidly obese parents. Some of that could be genetic, but most likely the kids inherited their parents poor eating habits and lack of any ambition to exercise. Ignorance breeds ignorance, if you will.
    To prevent this I would like to see that if you want to have kids you have to qualify. Some kind of “temporary sterilization" is administered at puberty and will be undone once you show you have the means both financially and intellectually to raise children who are healthy, contributing members of society.
    Please vote for me to be your Benevolent Dictator.
  • susannamarie
    susannamarie Posts: 2,148 Member
    It depends on HOW obese.

    I remember reading a story from a while back (2009?) where a teenager was removed from his mother's care because he already weighed 550 lbs and was continuing to gain. He suffered from sleep apnea and other consequences of his morbid obesity, and had been on CPS's radar for some time, but his weight just kept going up and up.

    He was placed with his aunt instead, and after a while he had weekend visitation with his mother. Over the next couple of years he lost over 250 lbs (which still puts him at grossly overweight), and he was planning on going to college as of the last update. http://www.americanownews.com/story/18098717/550-pound-teen-loses-weight-and-gains-hope-for-future

    I think in this case they made the right decision. I'm sure the boy missed his mother dreadfully, but I'm also sure that he was at serious health risk remaining with her. His mother claimed that she was following the nutritional guidelines she had been given, but he just got food on his own. Quite honestly, though, since he lost so much weight living with someone else instead, I tend to doubt that.

    I would definitely think that it should not be the first or even the second response, but rather the response of last resort.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    No, foster homes and the CPS system are already overloaded here in the US. Also in before the lock.
    This 100%

    they are in the UK too, which is another reason why I highly doubt that any of those kids were taken into care for the sole reason of being morbidly obese. Morbid obesity and concerns for the child's health because of it may have been a factor in those cases, but not the sole cause. The Daily Mirror is in the same league as the Sun and Daily Mail, i.e. sensationalist reporting for attention grabbing headlines and who cares if the facts are not quite right like of journalism.
  • sarainiowa
    sarainiowa Posts: 287 Member
    Pulling a family apart over obesity is not the answer. Good eating and exercise habits can be taught with some possible counseling or someone working with the family. Education in school is another good way to reach children and families.

    The foster care system is over loaded. Children aren't always placed in the best situation for them. They are placed where there is space. Often children are placed in multiple homes before returning to their families. This doesn't help the kids. Our society is proof the system don't work.

    Obesity is an important issue to address and I'm not suggesting we "turn a blind eye" to it. I am saying the foster care system needs to be for the exploited and abused children whom are in immediate danger. Obesity is dangerous, I get that. However, we all see obesity coming, it all depends when it's addressed. We should all focus on addressing it before it becomes a problem in our children and / or ourselves.
  • cakeordeath
    cakeordeath Posts: 229 Member
    What i do think should be done is that the parents should have to take a class on what feeding their child like that is doing to them, and then if they still choose to feed their child like that, knowing the harm they are doing then I can see why the child would need to be taken away. Though in all honesty, the foster system isn't much better. It's over crowded, underfunded and the children tend to be mistreated in other ways than overfeeding. Finding a good foster home is almost like winning the lottery.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
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  • ktsmom430
    ktsmom430 Posts: 1,100 Member
    We have already seen, just this week, that obesity in children under the age of 5 has declined in the past decade by 43%.
    People are aware and it is improving. Leave parenting to the parents, most love their children and want what is best for them. Taking them out of the home is not the solution. And who decides where they go? Where is the guarantee that it will be a better situation and that they will be able lose weight and be better off than they were with their families?

    Tongue in cheek, perhaps there should be classes that have to be completed before you can even become a parent.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    If the parents are beating them, yes.
  • mruntidy
    mruntidy Posts: 1,015 Member
    [/quote]

    I'm confused...

    Are you saying that the kids should be taken away? Or that the system should teach the parents about nutrition?
    [/quote]

    Nah, in summary it's wrong to take them away from parents but there is a weighted (no pun) responsibility on the part of the parent and in some part the government in at least changing attitudes to education. Particularly when there are children in the UK that literally don't know what a carrot looks like.

    I would go so far as to say it isn't the system's fault but that parents will often point the finger at the faceless government here (I can't speak for countries outside of the UK). However, there could be better education which could be promoted through the system during formative years to offset or at least make an individual think about what they are eating and what alternative options there are.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    No, foster homes and the CPS system are already overloaded here in the US. Also in before the lock.

    Right! Like the state could do a better job? Better for a kid to be overweight than to be missing or dead in the streets. The state should only intervene for abuse or neglect.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member

    I'm confused...

    Are you saying that the kids should be taken away? Or that the system should teach the parents about nutrition?

    Nah, in summary it's wrong to take them away from parents but there is a weighted (no pun) responsibility on the part of the parent and in some part the government in at least changing attitudes to education. Particularly when there are children in the UK that literally don't know what a carrot looks like.

    I would go so far as to say it isn't the system's fault but that parents will often point the finger at the faceless government here (I can't speak for countries outside of the UK). However, there could be better education which could be promoted through the system during formative years to offset or at least make an individual think about what they are eating and what alternative options there are.

    Oh I see your point. You're saying that the parents of these kids really can't blame the system. But that education should be the first directive of the system and taking the kids away a last resort.

    At least, I hope that was what you meant.
  • mruntidy
    mruntidy Posts: 1,015 Member

    I'm confused...

    Are you saying that the kids should be taken away? Or that the system should teach the parents about nutrition?

    Nah, in summary it's wrong to take them away from parents but there is a weighted (no pun) responsibility on the part of the parent and in some part the government in at least changing attitudes to education. Particularly when there are children in the UK that literally don't know what a carrot looks like.

    I would go so far as to say it isn't the system's fault but that parents will often point the finger at the faceless government here (I can't speak for countries outside of the UK). However, there could be better education which could be promoted through the system during formative years to offset or at least make an individual think about what they are eating and what alternative options there are.

    Oh I see your point. You're saying that the parents of these kids really can't blame the system. But that education should be the first directive of the system and taking the kids away a last resort.

    At least, I hope that was what you meant.

    Yes, pretty much - see you're clearly an expert you cut the waffle out of my post that saved at least 200 calories :wink:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member

    I'm confused...

    Are you saying that the kids should be taken away? Or that the system should teach the parents about nutrition?

    Nah, in summary it's wrong to take them away from parents but there is a weighted (no pun) responsibility on the part of the parent and in some part the government in at least changing attitudes to education. Particularly when there are children in the UK that literally don't know what a carrot looks like.

    I would go so far as to say it isn't the system's fault but that parents will often point the finger at the faceless government here (I can't speak for countries outside of the UK). However, there could be better education which could be promoted through the system during formative years to offset or at least make an individual think about what they are eating and what alternative options there are.

    Oh I see your point. You're saying that the parents of these kids really can't blame the system. But that education should be the first directive of the system and taking the kids away a last resort.

    At least, I hope that was what you meant.

    Yes, pretty much - see you're clearly an expert you cut the waffle out of my post that saved at least 200 calories :wink:

    :laugh:
  • Beckilovespizza
    Beckilovespizza Posts: 334 Member
    Whilst I do not agree with children being taken from their parents I did read the article and have found the following extract pretty shocking:

    "Incredibly, in the last three years, 183 youngsters – all aged 11 or under – were found to tip the scales at 16 stone-plus. Eight weighed more than 20 stone, with the heaviest at 23st 2lb."

    For an 11 year old to be over 20 stone has surely got to be seen as abusive, our schools generally provide healthy foods and assuming the weight problem is not a medical I cant see where else an 11 year would be able to access such fattening foods other than from home.

    I work in the care industry in the UK, with older people rather than children. I do understand that Social Services are pretty fair and do not take extreme actions such as removal of children from their families without looking at all angles and without trying to re-educate the parents. Social Services take on a multidisciplinary approach and involve other professionals and advocates, whist I do not know about the individual cases I should think Doctors, Dieticians and other professionals would have been involved and it would not have been a decision taken lightly. A scary outcome for all though!!
  • helsbelshms
    helsbelshms Posts: 93 Member
    I read a similar article to this that said one of the children that had been removed was 23st 2lb (324lb) and was under 11. This in my mind is cruelty. The parent can't blame poverty or anyone but themselves. If a child is a bit podgy then I see no problem, but for an 11 year old to get to 324lb, the parents have gone seriously wrong by providing ridiculous amounts of food for the child to gorge on.

    Although I agree taking children away from parents should be the last resort, I do believe that this particular child will be in a healthier environment away from his parents.

    Knowing the UK system, they will have monitored these kids for some time, they often leave kids with their parents for too long.

    I know my post may be controversial, but it's my opinion!
  • mruntidy
    mruntidy Posts: 1,015 Member
    I blame Greggs, their sausage rolls are amazing

    That said, I am put off by the article in that it doesn't take into account both extremes i.e. that of grossly underweight children either
  • No!!! You guys are dreaming if you think children are better off in state-run foster homes. So many kids get abused and molested in those type of situations.

    I think it would make a lot more sense to spend that money on providing health and nutrition counseling to families. Food addiction is a generational issue and a lot of parents hand it down without even realizing it's a problem.
  • thatjosiegirl
    thatjosiegirl Posts: 362 Member
    I worked in the group home system and worked with kids on Foster home.. Trust me, they are better off with their parents if the worst of their problems are being over fed or not being taught proper nutrition - that's something that can be taught, and their weight is something that can be fixed or changed, but to strip them from their family and put them with strangers that may or may not abuse and mistreat them is just wrong. There are better ways.

    ^^^ THIS!
  • Timelordlady85
    Timelordlady85 Posts: 797 Member
    Not necessarily
    But maybe some counseling for all
    I never want to see kids taken from their families unless the situation can't be helped

    I agree with this comment here. I do not believe that taking kids away from their families is emotionally healthy. of course no one wants to see a morbidly obese child and that is why those parents need to be given nutrition and health classes to better educate them on how to properly care for their children. Also some,yes I realize a very small percent have conditions that cause them to gain weight and or like my son whose 7 going 8 and has trouble gaining weight. I don't starve my children in any means he just has a high metabolism. so without knowing each individual's medical record and their daily lifestyle it would be hard to give a straight black and white answer on this. i think it should be case to case and give the parents a chance to change their bad behaviors before taking a child away from their family. my opinion only.:smile:
  • Timelordlady85
    Timelordlady85 Posts: 797 Member
    I worked in the group home system and worked with kids on Foster home.. Trust me, they are better off with their parents if the worst of their problems are being over fed or not being taught proper nutrition - that's something that can be taught, and their weight is something that can be fixed or changed, but to strip them from their family and put them with strangers that may or may not abuse and mistreat them is just wrong. There are better ways.

    ^^^ THIS!

    Well said! :)
  • KHalseth
    KHalseth Posts: 104 Member
    In many cases, parents don't know proper nutrition either. And people on fixed incomes often limited options in grocery shopping. And it isn't safe to play outside anymore. A whole lot of things work against kids anymore. But to start taking away children because of fat just opens the doors for being able to take kids away for any little reason whatsoever. "I'm sorry, your child's scores dropped this term. If they don't go up next term we will take your child away." I think it sets a bad precident.
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    I think you should make a new thread about pull ups.:happy:

    I thought you meant the ones my son used while potty training!:laugh:
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I blame Greggs, their sausage rolls are amazing

    That said, I am put off by the article in that it doesn't take into account both extremes i.e. that of grossly underweight children either

    Honestly, grossly underweight children (unless we are talking about teens) would actually fall under the legal terms of neglect. Therefore, taking the children away under those extreme circumstances is logical.
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