Thinking it's worse than it is

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volatiledreams
volatiledreams Posts: 28
in Health and Weight Loss
I was absolutely sure i'd gone over my goal the past two days. I literally thought I'd have bloated like a whale and completely negated my fast days by making up for the deficit ughhh. But I actually logged them today and I stayed to my goal thank GOD. As it happens though I am absolutely FULL of salt. Drank 3 liters of water since last night when we had pizza and I've only peed once :/

Does this ever happen to you? Do you ever think you've completely gone over and it turns out ok?

Also I found out where bfs been hiding my scales since i asked him to a few months ago ;) so i should be able to get a little motivated soon. scared of what they say though
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Replies

  • 3P0X
    3P0X Posts: 302
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    It is perfectly fine to go over every once in a while as long as you stay consistent with the deficit you will lose weight. :smile: I have a proper cheat meal every second Sunday (4000+ calories) to curb my cravings.
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    Why do you do "fast days"? You are only about 12 pounds from goal weight and recovering from an ED?
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
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    I was absolutely sure i'd gone over my goal the past two days. I literally thought I'd have bloated like a whale and completely negated my fast days by making up for the deficit ughhh. But I actually logged them today and I stayed to my goal thank GOD. As it happens though I am absolutely FULL of salt. Drank 3 liters of water since last night when we had pizza and I've only peed once :/

    Does this ever happen to you? Do you ever think you've completely gone over and it turns out ok?

    Also I found out where bfs been hiding my scales since i asked him to a few months ago ;) so i should be able to get a little motivated soon. scared of what they say though

    LOL how tall are you and how much do you weigh?
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    @deksgirl A. it's not actual fasting, actual fasting is nothing B. I'm following the diet where these fake fast days are recommended C. It doesn't matter how much you have to lose, especially as it's actually a really slow diet, as i was informed the other day D. I really like fasting

    @3P0X wowww i wish i could do that, i honestly look pregnant if i eat too much at once :p
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    ooo i forgot you could reply to a specific message :P 5'6.5 and i'm not sure exactly how much, 132-136 my guess is

    edit- and i should have used the quote button erghh. i'll get this site soon
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    @deksgirl A. it's not actual fasting, actual fasting is nothing B. I'm following the diet where these fake fast days are recommended C. It doesn't matter how much you have to lose, especially as it's actually a really slow diet, as i was informed the other day D. I really like fasting

    I imagine that you do like fasting, but it seems like it could be detrimental to ED recovery. Is this a doctor recommended diet?
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,372 Member
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    To be fair, if you log your meals 2 days later... it's probably not accurate anyway. I assume you didn't weigh them...
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    no, i only go to my doctor for contraception now, nothing else. and my recovery's gone on long enough now that i can say it's done ;) i'm being careful, it's ok
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    they were literally all processed food lol, the calories are on the menu ;) and i could tell you what i ate this day last year, i dare you. it's one of my talents. an elephant never forgets :P
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
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    they were literally all processed food lol, the calories are on the menu ;) and i could tell you what i ate this day last year, i dare you. it's one of my talents. an elephant never forgets :P

    I think I could tell you what you ate a year ago too. And last week. You need professional help.
  • SHHitsKaty
    SHHitsKaty Posts: 301
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    they were literally all processed food lol, the calories are on the menu ;) and i could tell you what i ate this day last year, i dare you. it's one of my talents. an elephant never forgets :P

    I think I could tell you what you ate a year ago too. And last week. You need professional help.

    Agreed.
  • sisterlilbunny
    sisterlilbunny Posts: 691 Member
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    no, i only go to my doctor for contraception now, nothing else. and my recovery's gone on long enough now that i can say it's done ;) i'm being careful, it's ok

    Just FYI, and you should know this already, recovery is never done. You have good days and bad, but you are never "healed", "done", "over it", etc.
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
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    no, i only go to my doctor for contraception now, nothing else. and my recovery's gone on long enough now that i can say it's done ;) i'm being careful, it's ok

    ED does not have a cure. It's a lifelong battle of addiction. There are plenty of warning signs jumping out right now, particularly the "I enjoy fasting" statement. Fasting is not in itself bad, but for those of us in recovery, it's very slippery slope.

    If you're in a spot where you're hiding scales, that tells me that you've got some obsessive compulsive issues that you really shouldn't be ignoring.
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    i didn't say that my ed was over, it never will be. i'm jsut saying recovery is.

    and also guys, you literally have no idea what you're talking about re professional help. in the uk you don't GET professional help until you're dying, and certainly not after you're done with the dying stuff, you're ok then right? you get a years wait for an appointment with a therapist, then every two weeks you might see someone, but not actual cbt, and not unless your body is collapsing. please believe me, any exception to this is an anomaly, not the rule.
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
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    Also the fact that you were inpatient for suicidal ideation as recently as December, I find it incredibly hard to believe that your doctor's have released you from care. Choosing to stop against doctor's advice is not the same as being "okay."

    Your photos are a mini-parade of anorexia glorification. Please, get some help.
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    no, i only go to my doctor for contraception now, nothing else. and my recovery's gone on long enough now that i can say it's done ;) i'm being careful, it's ok

    ED does not have a cure. It's a lifelong battle of addiction. There are plenty of warning signs jumping out right now, particularly the "I enjoy fasting" statement. Fasting is not in itself bad, but for those of us in recovery, it's very slippery slope.

    If you're in a spot where you're hiding scales, that tells me that you've got some obsessive compulsive issues that you really shouldn't be ignoring.

    i didn't hide the, i asked someone else too because they were getting me down at the time. not upsetting me now though, and i have the presence of mind to get them moved when i do. that's the difference between now and before i started recovery, i don't WANT to die. it's quite a big distinction
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
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    i didn't say that my ed was over, it never will be. i'm jsut saying recovery is.

    and also guys, you literally have no idea what you're talking about re professional help. in the uk you don't GET professional help until you're dying, and certainly not after you're done with the dying stuff, you're ok then right? you get a years wait for an appointment with a therapist, then every two weeks you might see someone, but not actual cbt, and not unless your body is collapsing. please believe me, any exception to this is an anomaly, not the rule.

    There are definitely exceptions to this. You just have to be willing to put up some money and seek the help. There are also plenty of recovery programs available internationally to provide support at little to no cost.

    I *do* know what I'm talking about, but it's easy to say someone doesn't when they say something you don't want to hear.

    Recovery is never over. It's obvious that the ED is not in remission.
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    december TWENTY TWELVE if you read properly. and i actually find that quite offensive, my photos are a personal motivation of when i was happiest with my weight. not when i'd destroyed my life, when i was maintaining ok without being so unhappy
  • volatiledreams
    volatiledreams Posts: 28
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    when i was ill my parents barely had enough money to pay the rent. the bill from my hospital stay that the nhs picked up for me was over £40,000. why does a simple thread asking whether anyone ever feels like they've done worse than they have turn into a personal attack on my life choices, which you know nothing about?
  • Quasita
    Quasita Posts: 1,530 Member
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    no, i only go to my doctor for contraception now, nothing else. and my recovery's gone on long enough now that i can say it's done ;) i'm being careful, it's ok

    ED does not have a cure. It's a lifelong battle of addiction. There are plenty of warning signs jumping out right now, particularly the "I enjoy fasting" statement. Fasting is not in itself bad, but for those of us in recovery, it's very slippery slope.

    If you're in a spot where you're hiding scales, that tells me that you've got some obsessive compulsive issues that you really shouldn't be ignoring.

    i didn't hide the, i asked someone else too because they were getting me down at the time. not upsetting me now though, and i have the presence of mind to get them moved when i do. that's the difference between now and before i started recovery, i don't WANT to die. it's quite a big distinction

    A semantic argument doesn't erase my point. Hiding scales is hiding scales. If you have more than one, it's a sign, and the fact that you're on here even though you know people who love you would "kill you" if they knew you were trying to lose just tells me you're in denial.

    We can't help you if you're not ready to accept it. There are a few people on this thread that are sunk deep into ED education and recover (including myself) who could really provide amazing support, but we're not going to bring someone under out attention and care who is just going to refuse to hear us, and display triggers all day.

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