Hi. My name is Bethany, and I am a food addict.

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comittobethin
comittobethin Posts: 42 Member
in Motivation and Support
Starting weight: 320
Current weight: 299
Goal weight: 160

I got down to 289! I was so proud of myself. Then.... the holidays happened.

I got sidetracked. I was doing so well and fell off after Christmas which is exactly what I promised myself I wouldn't do. Here it is, March, and 2 months have been wasted. Not only was I not losing weight, but I gained back 10 lbs that I worked so hard to remove. I gave up on myself and gave in to my short term desires, which cost me in the long run. Today is my first day back in the gym. I have been pretty miserable these past two months, not only because I have been avoiding exercise and eating badly, but also because it is winter.
I am a little hopeful, but I am also discouraged that I went that long destroying my body again. Thankfully I am not completely set back and am motivated again to start losing weight. When I was eating bad, I would get excited before I ate, and gobbled it down without fully enjoying it. The moment I got done with my last bite, I would be thinking one of two things; what my next meal would be or how bad I felt about myself. I really didn't, and still don't, understand why I do that to myself. When I was doing so well with my eating before, I would allow myself little treat meals where I would be able to eat something that wasn't healthy, but I would portion it so that I only ate half of the meal for lunch and half of the meal for dinner so that it wasn't OVER indulging. When I am not watching what I eat, I shove everything I can down my throat as almost to fill a void that can never be filled.
Being healthy is more important than food, I know this, but in the heat of the moment when my tummy is growling, all logic goes out the window. I am slowly starting to realize how food is actually a drug. My body is addicted to it. Losing weight is all about mind over matter. I need to be mentally strong to do this or I will fail. I need to make decisions not to put myself in situations that might cause problems. Hi. My name is Bethany, and I am a food addict.
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Replies

  • nomoreyoyo67
    nomoreyoyo67 Posts: 59
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    Hi Bethany
    I am also what you might call a food addict. I LOVE FOOD!! It shows too, I need to lose 50lbs. Feel free to add me and we can support each other:)
  • aimeemarie150
    aimeemarie150 Posts: 354 Member
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    I am a recovering food addict.
    I started at 305, and am down to 218. :)
  • curwhibbles
    curwhibbles Posts: 138 Member
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    Yes! Exactly....trying to fill a void. I'm there, and mine started with the holiday foods as well. I still ate at a deficit, but have been surviving off of cookies for 2 1/2 months (it feels like this at least). No workouts, no "real" calorie counts, and no accountability....my body feels like crap. And the further it goes...the more I want to eat, bashing myself for doing so. I, too, am a food addict....trying to get back on track.
  • huneydrop
    huneydrop Posts: 84
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    You might benefit for doing keto (high fat/moderate protein/low carb/low sugar). I would suggest doing some research on it for yourself. I have been doing it for quite awhile and have been losing weight and it is the only thing that has improved my health (as verified by my Dr. and blood tests) and allowed me to not obsess about food and not feel hungry. Plus I get to eat delicious food (bacon and eggs, burgers (no bun) smothered in cheese and mayo, ect.)!

    Some people will never understand food addiction so don't waste your time trying to get them to. It is probably the worst addiction out there to have because unlike alcohol and drugs you NEED food to survive. What do you think the success rate for alcoholics would be is they HAD to have 2 beers a day to survive......... You can't quit food. But you can find ways to release its mental hold on you.
  • aimeemarie150
    aimeemarie150 Posts: 354 Member
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    I disagree with the person above me....you don't want high fat!

    http://www.livestrong.com/article/249377-the-risks-of-high-fat-diets/

    You should get at least 30% fat daily, but everything in moderation. You also need good carbs in your diet. The key is balance. These "fad" diets don't work for long, and people usually end up relapsing on them.
  • Rainboots80
    Rainboots80 Posts: 218 Member
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    I am also doing low carb and find it easier then just cutting calories. I am also vegetarian so I struggle a little with low carb because I can't eat steak, bacon, burgers ect.
  • Schlackity
    Schlackity Posts: 268 Member
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    I have been having a similar problem....my downfall started with the holidays, and although I haven't gained weight back, I'm not losing. I have a week where I drop two pounds, then gain three, then lose 3, then lose one, then gain two. It's pretty much like being in maintenance I guess, which is nice to know that I can do that, but I'm not ready for maintenance yet. I still have 30 lbs to lose before my FIRST goal (I had planned to reassess at that point). I got most of my exercise from walking until the holidays and nasty weather came along. I have been doing extra squats (4 sets of 15 twice a day) and push-ups (4 sets of 10 twice a day) and started using a kettle bell (25 lbs right now) to add some weight to it and maybe that has helped me gain some muscle, but I just cannot seem to stop "sneaking" food. I think it really started with the Christmas cookies. But now the cookies are long gone and I'm still sneaking carbs like it's my job.

    I really feel like not getting out to walk leaves me feeling like I want to eat. Maybe it's just a weird mental thing for me, but when I go out and walk for a while, I'm not that hungry and I don't usually overeat. When I'm in the house all day, I start with the food sneaking.

    It's truly a scary feeling to know that I am not doing a good job at controlling myself because I know what I'm doing when I'm doing it, and still don't stop myself. I need to find that one thing that rings a bell in my head to pull me back to reality, and the reality for me is this - stop sneaking food and sabotaging your health or you will end up right back where you started.

    If anyone has been able to find something that is their "cue" to pull it together, please share....I'm sure the ideas would be helpful.
  • MistyKnapp
    MistyKnapp Posts: 17
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    First, good job ladies! There are some things I noticed in the posts: first identify (if you can) what void you're trying to fill with food. Then find exercises that you love to do so you'll not dread them (I'm currently working on this one!). Next if you think you're hungry, try drinking a large glass of water and wait 30 minutes. If you're still hungry, try a snack or small meal. Right now, I'm trying to eat every 3 hours. I'm also doing this program with my husband so I have accountability. Oh, and cookies... I finally had to tell my husband that I can't buy them anymore since I over-eat on them. Ditto for chips. I've got 13 pounds to go and I've hit a snag... they just hang on.
  • acb2144
    acb2144 Posts: 34
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    I understand that need for a "cue" that turns everything around.
    Maybe for you it has to do with that concept of "sneaking"; can you ask yourself why you need to sneak, who you're sneaking from? Can you work on eliminating the need for that feeling in your life? Ultimately, the calorie diary here is supposed to be for accountability, but obviously it's easy to cheat, and cheat ourselves.

    My cue came when I knew I had lost a lot of functional ability over the winter (after not exercising and eating due to grief at loss of a loved one), and I knew winter would eventually end and I would have to stop hiding under my coat. I don't want to live this way; I want to be strong. Life is finite and I'm hoping it's better lived with honesty and hard work. That's my mantra, anyway. :) hope that helps.
  • CelebrityStatus
    CelebrityStatus Posts: 84 Member
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    Hiiii Bethany!

    I am a food addict too... but have a sever hate to love it issue. I battled with over eating, bulimia, and severe restriction up until the beginning of January of this year... a never ending cycle of the three of them.

    For New Year's ... I decided that I was going to give up all THREE of those vices- and so far, it's sort of worked!

    I cut out things that I didn't like very much but ate anyways (rice/pasta/potato chips/soda) and replaced them with things that I do like (I learned that I LOVE avocado). It's been very slow, but I have gradually started craving the taste of healthier items. My favourite dinner is a piece of baked salmon, an avocado, some light artichoke and asiago dip, and cucumbers, followed by a portion sized frozen yogurt bar. I could eat that every single night and always feel satisfied. It's a balance. Being overweight is caused by many habits and a lot of times, food addiction, whether people want to admit it or not.

    Unfortunately, you don't get the same support as an alcoholic. No one looks at you with pity and says, "it's okay, I'll help you get through your food addiction" , no one takes your hand and guides you, no one watches you to make sure that you're following your plan. Because it's "just food". But it's the same mindset. It's an addiction and you feel that you need it, in the capacity of extreme over eating.

    Another thing that really helped me was to exercise frequently. If I just spent all that time exercising... I didn't want to "ruin" it by eating an extra 2000 calories, right? It's a great motivator, and a cushion if you go 200-300 over your limit for the first little while.

    If you need a friend, feel free to add me (that goes for anyone struggling)... it's an uphill battle, but you CAN do it.
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
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    Bump for later.
  • thesevolatiletimes
    thesevolatiletimes Posts: 59 Member
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    I'm a food addict as well. Technically diagnosed as Binge Eating Disorder, but my patterns of eating, relationship with food, etc. resembles an addiction more than anything else! It's horrific how this struggle plagues our minds, and ravishes our health. <3

    What's helped me the most has been focusing on my health, more so than my weight. I focus on eating foods that taste really good and healthy foods that make me happy! Once you surround yourself with the right foods and work on whatever triggered your food addiction to begin with, you'll find yourself naturally gravitating towards the natural balance of macronutrients, without even tracking such. <3

    Best of luck, and to all of you in recovery, congrats! :) It's a hard battle, but I'd personally like to think it's worth it. <3
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
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    I am also doing low carb and find it easier then just cutting calories. I am also vegetarian so I struggle a little with low carb because I can't eat steak, bacon, burgers ect.

    Just be sure to get the protein you need. Its very important.
  • austinsneeze
    austinsneeze Posts: 222 Member
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    Hi Bethany!

    We all are. It's ok! This is a totally welcoming and motivational group with the same common goal :) We'd love to support you!
  • smand2000
    smand2000 Posts: 88
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    Clean the cupboards of food you binge on. It is a lot harder to go off the rails if all you have to choose from is baby carrots, celery, and hummus. Or individually portioned nuts. Or fruits. Lean meats. Etc ... If I have chips or cookies in my place, I feel compelled to eat them. Don't know why. If they're not around, I don't miss them. And if I reallly do want something, and decide that it is ok (or truly the craving won't go away), I wrap up in the winter coat and head outside to get it. And it better be worth it in this cold!

    Good luck...
  • Schlackity
    Schlackity Posts: 268 Member
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    I probably should have rephrased the term "sneaking." I don't hide from anyone when I am eating what doesn't fit into my daily calories/macros. I don't know what the correct term should be.....but an example is when I'm cooking dinner. I have food on the stove and I reach into the fridge for some ingredient I need and spy the peanut butter (I discovered organic chunky peanut butter) and then I end up eating a spoonful of it while I'm cooking. And then I notice that the loaf of Irish soda bread is on the counter and I reach for it and eat a piece of that too. It's that kind of stuff that adds up and puts a serious dent in my calories for the day.

    But, to my own credit, I do log every single thing I eat. It's rough to see that number at the end of the day but I know I need to do it. I try to log as I eat, but I don't always have access to my laptop (kids use it for homework), so maybe that's the deal.....I can only eat something when I can log it right away. I guess the trick is to make myself actually do that...LOL. I often put in my meals for the day the night before so that part is already logged, but I still update at the end of the day when I know I have eaten more than what's already logged.

    I did something a while back that worked for a little while. I would write on the palm of my hand in black Sharpie marker something that I would see all the time. The last time, it was the number 36 because that was how many pounds until my first goal, so maybe I should write STOP on my hand so I actually consider it before I reach for something.
  • huneydrop
    huneydrop Posts: 84
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    I disagree with the person above me....you don't want high fat!

    http://www.livestrong.com/article/249377-the-risks-of-high-fat-diets/

    You should get at least 30% fat daily, but everything in moderation. You also need good carbs in your diet. The key is balance. These "fad" diets don't work for long, and people usually end up relapsing on them.

    If are keeping your carbs low fat is nothing to fear, this is very uniformed of you. It is also why I told the op to do their own research. I'm doing it ( as are MANY people) and I'm healthier now than before and 70% of my diet is fat. Dr and blood test verified. Oh and I'm also losing weight so tell me again how low carb/high fat is bad for you?????
    My way of eating is not a fad, it has been around as long as people have been counting calories - guess that's just a fad too.
  • aimeemarie150
    aimeemarie150 Posts: 354 Member
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    I disagree with the person above me....you don't want high fat!

    http://www.livestrong.com/article/249377-the-risks-of-high-fat-diets/

    You should get at least 30% fat daily, but everything in moderation. You also need good carbs in your diet. The key is balance. These "fad" diets don't work for long, and people usually end up relapsing on them.

    If are keeping your carbs low fat is nothing to fear, this is very uniformed of you. It is also why I told the op to do their own research. I'm doing it ( as are MANY people) and I'm healthier now than before and 70% of my diet is fat. Dr and blood test verified. Oh and I'm also losing weight so tell me again how low carb/high fat is bad for you?????

    I've been eating on a 30% fat daily allowance, and I've lost a substantial amount. Mine is also Dr. and multiple tests approved. I posted the risks...It is not uninformed of me; I've been researching diets for a long time. I agree the OP needs to do their own research so she can decide for herself what is best.
  • Mathlete22
    Mathlete22 Posts: 12 Member
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    There are online meetings you can watch and participate in at overeaters anonymous website. They also have a lot of good literature on their website and google. A lot f their suggestions help. They made their program based on alcoholic anonymous. Like you said before it's like a drug addition. But it's more than 'like' a drug addiction it is the exact same. Food releases similar chemicals in the brain that people have when additcted to drugs and alcohol. It's helped to to try and think of it like this. Addiction can manifest in many areas of peoples lives. Some people choose drugs and alcohol and others choose food and shopping. It's all the same. That instant gratification and then regret. It's like Dr Jekyll and mr Hyde.

    One huge thing that I read from there that has really helped is taking it "one day at a time" thinking in the mindset that "just for today" I won't overeat or over indulge. Or if I'm craving ice cream or something else I know I can't control myself with then I will say ok for the next hour I won't eat it and see if I still want it. Usually that helps and my mind stop obsessing on it and I don't eat it.

    Also I don't allow myself to get too hungry. I try to eat every 2 hours. I can't control myself when I'm too hungry.

    I also do NOT keep anything in my house I know I overeat. (Chips, snacks, candy, chocolate, even bagels)

    I've accepted I can't control myself.

    Hope this helps. Always looking for more friends and motivators. Add me.
  • walkingforward
    walkingforward Posts: 174 Member
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    Bumping. For later !

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