Spouses feeling nervous about your weight loss?

hookemhorns2013
hookemhorns2013 Posts: 56
in Health and Weight Loss
Has anyone been through this? Your husband or wife are happy and supportive your losing weight but act like it makes them nervous? Like people will look at you more or they have a fear of losing you if you get all hot and thin?

Replies

  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    Sorry but not mine.

    he's not the least bit nervous of me losing weight.

    He always thought I was hot and my weight doesn't change that...
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    From what I can tell, much of the nervousness comes from one spouse suddenly having a life change while the other is maintaining the status quo. You're starting to do something on your own that they (usually) aren't a part of and it makes them feel isolated. Add in the fact that your life change usually highlights their own need to do the same combined with them not being ready, it makes them feel insecure.


    It really isn't all that surprising.
  • hookemhorns2013
    hookemhorns2013 Posts: 56
    I agree.
  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
    I think it depends on each person and their relationship. My husband and I have both gone through weight gains and losses during our marriage. Losing weight? Not a problem. Exercising more? Fine. Making a lifestyle change at the expense of marital/family time? Problem.

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to lose weight and be more healthy, but if it gets to the point where it consumes you, where you can't go out to dinner without there being drama over the menu and potential calories, you spend more time at the gym than you do with your spouse, and all you talk about is fitness/health, then it may not be your spouse who has the problem. <--- Speaking in general terms, not to any specific person
  • Sovi_
    Sovi_ Posts: 575 Member
    No, mine is loving it and joined me.
  • RunningForeverMama
    RunningForeverMama Posts: 261 Member
    From what I can tell, much of the nervousness comes from one spouse suddenly having a life change while the other is maintaining the status quo. You're starting to do something on your own that they (usually) aren't a part of and it makes them feel isolated. Add in the fact that your life change usually highlights their own need to do the same combined with them not being ready, it makes them feel insecure.


    It really isn't all that surprising.

    ^^^ Great explanation. Seems true here, I am not the same person and it does make my husband uncomfortable. I used to be content to just stay home all.the.time, never spoke my mind, etc. Now, yeah, not so much. Wife gets hot, wife is no longer content with the status quo (which for us pretty much meant never going anywhere ever, no date nights, no vacations, etc).... I'm not going anywhere but I am getting a life and my husband is definitely insecure with the situation. BUT sometimes they get on board, now he's started cycling and even planned a date. ~faints~ (but smiles :happy: )

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