I am stressing! Help Please!

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I am new at this and trying very hard to eat healthy and shed about 15 to 20lbs. I have a calorie limit of 1200 daily...and haven't even been reaching that for the past few days... I still have several hundred calories left at the end of each day...which I thought was a good thing. I eat grilled chicken and baked fish with veggies and fruit and drink only water... I have not weighed myself and have no idea how much I weigh. I feel better about myself however. I have been exercising as well...which again helps burn the calories I consume during the day.
Tonight my family and I are supposed to go out to eat for my brothers birthday. We are going to a seafood bar and grill and I know it will be very hard for me to control my cravings! I have looked online at the menu...and they have jambalaya and some other really yummy dishes...and I want to eat them so bad!! But I am scared it will mess up my progress over the past few days. :( Should I go and just eat a salad and some grilled fish again or treat myself to whatever I want? There will also be ice-cream cake! :( Someone help me! I don't know what to do!!!
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Replies

  • LindseyRebecca1990
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    My name is Lindsey by the way! I am 23 years old and am new at this! :)
  • Doskymom
    Doskymom Posts: 6
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    Go out tonight and have fun. Celebrate with your family and eat what you want I wouldn't worry about this one meal - you can get right back on the diet tomorrow. You need to treat yourself once in awhile. If 80% of your days are good and 20% are days where you cheat, you will still win the diet wars.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    one meal out wont make you fat, just liek one salad wont make you thin... enjoy the birthday celebration, a few extra cals wont hurt, especially when it sounds like you're under eatign as it is.

    with 15lbs to lose, you should be losing 0.5-1lb per week maximum, do theres no need to eat 1200 cals or less.
  • ImpishVanity
    ImpishVanity Posts: 224 Member
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    If you don't know how much you weigh, how do you know you need to lose 15-20lbs?

    Also, 1200 calories is the bare minimum your body needs just to function. You shouldn't be going under this at all. If you are exercising you should eat back at least some of those calories you burn as well - your body needs fuel.

    Don't stress out over food. You can eat whatever you want to eat and still lose if you do it in moderation. If you mess up one day and go over, it's still ok. Just pick yourself up the next day and move on.
  • TomTomato
    TomTomato Posts: 223
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    Not meeting a goal of 1,200 cals/day means you are probably eating too little. That could slow your metabolism and be counter-productive. I also believe your goal may be too low. As far as exceeding your goal, you should look more at the average over a few days, that way if you are a little over one day, a couple days being slightly under should balance it out. But by all means, perform some calculations to ensure your goal is healthy and reasonable and try to stay close to it.
  • Singlejules
    Singlejules Posts: 55 Member
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    Hi
    If it was me, i would go and enjoy myself. I would eat all of what I like but in moderation. Then get back on track the following day. You may gain a few pounds , but you have to enjoy what your doing or you will come off plan. Maybe exercise a bit more to cover extra calories. Dont worry or you will not enjoy your healthy eating. Have a good time :)
  • LindseyRebecca1990
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    Thank you for the advice everyone! I will make sure to start eating more to reach that 1200 calorie intake for sure! Like I said...I am just very new at all of this! I appreciate all of your advice! :)
  • Vsera
    Vsera Posts: 10
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    I believe to take everything in moderation. Don't eat everything is sight, just have a little. With myself If I completely cut sweets out, I will have issues! ha So ill allow myself to have a piece of dove chocolate or something. Hope this helps! Good luck!
  • klschuchardt
    klschuchardt Posts: 10 Member
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    Lindsey - welcome first of all! :) And I agree with a few others here. Go out and enjoy yourself. Personally, I have found that the longer I deprive myself of "treats" the more I want them and then end up binging on them. But if I let myself have a little once in awhile, I get my fix and can move on. But I also agree with a few others that is sounds like you aren't eating enough if you are under 1200 calories each day. You're probably craving more of everything because you're just plain hungry. Good luck! :)
  • BlanketII
    BlanketII Posts: 11
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    Hi Lindsey,

    I have lots of thoughts about your post but first and foremost I would suggest you go out and celebrate your brothers birthday without any guilt about what you eat. It sounds like you've been working very hard and eating well and one meal will not make you fat (just as someone pointed out one healthy meal will not make you thin!) Food should be enjoyed but for the majority of the time we need to monitor what we eat so we do not get into bad habits without realising it. I know I can overeat all the wrong foods and I had no idea how many calories I could consume so easily so this site is helpful for that.

    I'm a bit confused about how you know you only need to eat 1200 calories if you don't know what you weigh. When I joined this site I had to give my height and weight to help it work out my calorie intake. If you don't know how heavy you are, how do you know you need to lose 15-20lbs. That's quite a lot of weight to want to shift, especially if you don't need to. (By the way, this is rhetorical mumblings, I'm not asking you to state how much you weigh if you don't want to!!)
    Also re calories, having so many left over by the end of the day doesn't sound too healthy. While eating less will help you lose weight your body will also go into starvation mode if you don't eat enough and this is when it stores every ounce of fat possible to try and keep you healthy. Maybe eating a bit more and doing some good exercise would be a more helpful way to shift weight if you need to, and tone up.

    For what it's worth I would go and enjoy a meal of my choice tonight and be happy and laugh a lot with my family. Then tomorrow I would wake up happy and think what lovely memories I had helped to make. In that mood you're much more likely to want to go for a nice walk or cook some healthy breakfast than if you're miserable because you feel you missed out.

    Whatever you choose, have a fab night! :o)
  • fast_eddie_72
    fast_eddie_72 Posts: 719 Member
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    Not meeting a goal of 1,200 cals/day means you are probably eating too little.

    Or eating more than you realize. It's unlikely anyone would be "hundreds of calories under" a 1,200 calorie goal for any period of time unless they had an eating disorder.

    If you're not using a food scale, you might consider getting one. I know I wasn't accurately logging my food before I got mine. I was surprised how far off my estimates were.
  • KristineTrinity
    KristineTrinity Posts: 2 Member
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    Don't stress, eat the jumbalaya and have fun. You have the calories to spare. I've been told that if you eat under the 1200/day calorie limit you put your body into starvation mode and your metabolism slows down so you still don't lose weight. I had the same issue, wondering why I suddenly put on weight while not really eating much. Still struggling myself to find a good healthy balance each day. I'm a coffee fanatic and like it sweet so my sugar intake is too high. I've also been on a hot apple cider kick recently and that has too much sugar. So it looks like I'm going to have to cut that out and severly limit my coffee. Also struggling with getting the right balance of carbs/fat/protein. Using the online version is helping with that since I can see the break down and where I'm going off the rails. Good luck and keep with it. And enjoy the birthday party.
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,583 Member
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    OP, update your goals. 1200 isn't appropriate for what you're doing. Set it to .5lb per week, weigh/measure/log accurately. Profit.
  • PhoenixWithoutAshes1
    PhoenixWithoutAshes1 Posts: 99 Member
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    Welcome aboard! I think you will find an abundance of help and support here! This site is all about learning to eat healthy and how to reap the benefits of that, such as weight loss and better overall health. As for going out tonight, go and enjoy yourself! It's one day, one meal really. It's okay to treat yurself once in a while, if you don't you'll just start to resent what you are doing!
  • LindseyRebecca1990
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    I have been eating a banana for breakfast...and drinking close to 10 16.9 oz of water daily... I eat fish or chicken with a steamed vegetable for lunch... and then another banana a few hours later...then an apple...then some sunflower seeds... possibly some blueberries and cucumbers as well...just snacks throughout the day....then at night I eat chicken or fish with a veggie and like some whole wheat rice... but I have been trying to eat smaller portions. I don't know. I certainly do not what to be unhealthy about this... I just want to be comfortable in my own skin again! I thought I could diet to get to the size I would like and then just be careful and monitor it... I normally eat McDonalds 3 times a week...and eat very unhealthy....cookies before bed... chips...sodas... so just not eating all of that stuff and exercising is a huge deal for me. haha! I appreciate all of your advice and help! You guys make me feel not so alone!
  • suey2k1
    suey2k1 Posts: 10 Member
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    Reply to Fast_Eddie_72 about under eating. I eat oatmeal for breakfast and loads of fruit, veg, salad, tuna and chicken etc on a daily basis but because I can't eat bread, potatoes, rice and have quinoa for my carbs my total is easily under 1200 on a daily basis so I have to 'top up' with nuts and seeds. Sometimes i have to remind myself I have to eat as I don't feel hungry and drink lots of water so it doesn't necessarily mean I, or anyone else has 'an eating disorder'
  • LindseyRebecca1990
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    I am about 5'6 to 5'7 and the last I weight I was about 156lbs. That is the most I have ever been and I felt huge and unhealthy. I was out of breath and felt so tired just trying to jog to the end of my road. I know I am out of shape and need to change something or I will end up way overweight and out of shape. I do not want to be too thin...just healthy.
  • hipsdontlie1
    hipsdontlie1 Posts: 294 Member
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    Girl! Eat some more please, atleast net 1200 calories like everyone else said. Also, Go out and enjoy yourself!!! We all need a little sanity sometimes and that's what lifes all about. Order what you want, try to stay away from deep fried items, maybe eat half your meal and save the other half for tomorrow! That's what I always like to do. Enjoy!
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
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    It's okay to eat whatever you want once in a while... I used this strategy recently, I took the family out to a nice restaurant, and we had 3 courses, appies, main and dessert...JUST limit your portions... and make use of the "doggy bag" ... IF you "need" to feel full...munch on a couple hundred grams of baby carrots before you head out... and remember this is about creating and LIVING a healthy lifestyle, and part of that is being able to participate in these events...

    THE great part of this strategy is... Jambalaya in the fridge for the next day (or two)...
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    I am about 5'6 to 5'7 and the last I weight I was about 156lbs. That is the most I have ever been and I felt huge and unhealthy. I was out of breath and felt so tired just trying to jog to the end of my road. I know I am out of shape and need to change something or I will end up way overweight and out of shape. I do not want to be too thin...just healthy.

    set MFP to lose 1lb per week, i bet it doesn tgive you 1200 cals... eat more! all you are doing by eating so little is encouraging your body to burn muscle not fat.