23 yo woman overweight all my life. Need help all around

ToniLynnF
ToniLynnF Posts: 15
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi, Im Toni Lynn and have been overweight/obese since even being a toddler. I have struggled with my weight for years and want to lose weight while maintaining a nice figure (the least amount of loose skin the better) if that is even possible. I am 5ft3 and currently weigh 180 pounds. Ive tried to lose weight in the past but never seem to be able to but enough is enough. I am now married (to a pretty fit guy) and have a four year old son. I want to be around as long as possible for them and to be able to enjoy all the time we have together. I have done a lot of reading on weight loss and fitness but it seems that a lot of the information I come across can be contradicting and I really dont know where to start. If anyone is willing to give me some pointers about starting off, easy/quick healthy meals that myself and my family can enjoy, excercises that I can actually physically do at this point in my weight loss journey, motivate me in any way or anything you can think of, please do! I may have failed in the past but I am more determined than ever to see this through and feel happy and confident about myself as well as be able to keep up with my family and be a good role model to my son. Thank you all in advance and please if you would like to add me as a friend, do so!

Replies

  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    Hello :-) I was also over weight since a child, my heaviest was around 202(I refused to get on scale after that so I really don't know how much higher it got) I'm 33 now and weigh 135 :-) I can tell you exactly how to lose weight, count your calories and eat at a deficit :-) its really that simple. You can add me as a friend!
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    Toni,

    Welcome! Yep, the previous poster said it best- eat at a calorie deficit.

    Even while losing weight you can eat whatever you want whenever you want, you just need to keep it within a calorie goal.

    From your ticker, it looks like you are trying to lose 35 pounds. For this, you might want to set your goals in MFP to lose about one pound per week. Weigh all your food, log everything you eat, and if you exercise eat a portion of those calories back. It's not about foods you can and cannot eat, it's about portion control and moderation. That way, you don't deprive yourself and you eat the same foods as your family.

    By the way, I was also fat as a toddler. The doctor told my mother feed me less formula. I grew up fat, with my average weight all through high school being 190 to 200 pounds, and I'm 5 ft 4. As an adult, my weight fluctuated, and after my mom died when I was 23 I got up to about 220. Finally, about 12 or 13 years ago,I decided enough was enough and got down to 155. I maintained for quite awhile, and then slowly the weight started creeping back on, until I came out of denial and realized I'd put 30 pounds back on. That was when I cam here last year, and now I am 40 pounds lighter at 142 to 143 pounds.

    If I can do it, others can do it, and if WE can do it, so can you! I'm rooting for you!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    I am still trying to figure this site out and if it says I am only trying to lose about 35 pounds thats nonsense and I need to figure out how to change that haha I realistically need to drop about 50 pounds to be at a healthy weight for my size. Im definitely cutting calories but I am also interested in eating healthy and not necessarily just cut calories if that makes sense. I figure 500 calories of veggies is probably a lot better for me than say 500 calories of pizza or something. I want to drop the weight but also be healthy and fit first and foremost. I figure that with a healthy and active lifestyle and change of habits the weight will come off naturally. Thank you guys for the support and encouragement and any pointers you may have. It really does mean the world to me and its very nice to see that there are other people out their on their journey who dont mind taking their time to help me reach my goals. Thank you, thank you, thank you! It means the world to me :)
  • Erikalynne18
    Erikalynne18 Posts: 558 Member
    1. best advice would be to fully commit to this! You are going to have rough days but that's okay! :) The key is to log in everyday and log everything (even when it's your birthday and you ate a chocolate eruption cheesecake at +1000 cal a slice... don't judge it was delicious!!).
    2. make short term goals and a realistic timeline. You will lose more in the beginning but remember after the first month or so it will taper off and you should expect to only drop about 1-2 lbs/ wk and that's okay! :) Keep this in mind while making a timeline :)
    3. make rewards if you meet your goals on your timeline :) Maybe a massage or a new pair of shoes, just keep it non-food related :)
    4. check out http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/ and compare this to what mfp has suggested. I point this out because I have a very active job but yet MFP set me as 1200 in the beginning and I was so hungry (legit hungry, stomach growling, couldn't sleep at night, fatigue, no energy, etc.) that I felt like giving up :( Then when I did some research I realised I was eating far too calories. A deficit is good, however a bigger deficit is not always better!
    5. remember it's not a race :) I was 175 when I started. You can check my 'progress timeline' on my profile to see how long it took me to drop the weight. In the beginning I thought it would only take about 6 months but it took closer 10, but I don't regret it :)
    6. and finally... when you have those rough days, come on mfp and tell your mfp friends, they will understand much more than fb or coworkers or whatever because we have ALL had those days!!
  • Erikalynne18
    Erikalynne18 Posts: 558 Member
    I am still trying to figure this site out and if it says I am only trying to lose about 35 pounds thats nonsense and I need to figure out how to change that haha I realistically need to drop about 50 pounds to be at a healthy weight for my size.

    On the main "home page" click on 'goals' -> change goals -> select guided or custom then click continue -> here you can update your current weight and goal weight, click 'update' and the ticker will be adjusted :)
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    If you get rid of the weight while you're still in your 20's, it's very likely you won't have to suffer through loose skin. Younger skin is way more elastic.
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Hey I wanted to say thank you for all of your suggestions and for helping fix my "ticker". I have my target weight (125 pounds) and my current weight (180 pounds) and yet I dont believe it says I need to drop 55 pounds even though the info I have added is correct. Also, it says I am only looking to drop 1.5 pounds per week but just moments ago it had said 2 pounds a week. Im not quite sure why that is or where theyre coming up with these figures. Id like my info to be as accurate as possible but if thats just how the site works than Ill take what I can get haha Thanks again, the motivation really is keeping me upbeat and positive about all the big changes!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Thats great news to hear about skin elasticity and youth because Ive been really obsessing over how I will look once I drop the weight. Hoping that steady excercise (not sure which is best) will aid in that as well!
  • DesiPandasaur
    DesiPandasaur Posts: 4
    If you aren't used to exercise and you want to do it daily I have found starting for 5mins a day then going up from there helps. The most important thing is changing your mindset. If you think you can't do something, Im sorry, you will not. However, you are here and trying to get motivation, tips, and advice! You can do this. I am a similar start weight and height. I was 181 starting this January and I am 5'4". I am now at 163. With my first child, though, I was 198 after. SO, you can do this! Uhh, I think getting your health and body to work for you is best when changing diets. I upped my veggies and fruits and cut out sugar, grains, and bread. This is what I do..NOt telling you to do the same.
    Drink a ton or water
    You'll do great. Just keep going after your goals. Nothing is impossible.
  • Blokeypoo
    Blokeypoo Posts: 274 Member
    I'm 5'2.5 and weigh 133lbs down from 161ish.

    Don't rush and aim for too fast a loss - that is a diet, what you want is real lifelong change. That is so much easier to achieve with small changes. I lost on 1400 cals and being more active but not "blue in the face" cardio which I hate.

    Choose things you CAN do and you'll be fine, eventually you might even WANT to do them!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Thanks for the help guys, even though I just restarted using this site yesterday I began trying to be more healthy on Monday. I ate some hard boiled eggs, a grilled chicken salad with no dressing and a banana and went to the gym and did 20mins on the elliptical and some leg exercises on a few machines (really not sure what theyre called). Since then Ive pretty much been eating the same way (trying to eat better foods and not so much processed things as I have in the past) and just being more active in general. IE went jogging/walking in intervals with my husband which Im super proud of, always been too embarrassed to work out in public so that was a big deal to me. Did some upper body exercises with a resistance band one of the days, Took it easy on the next day as I felt very sore but still only ate salad so I didnt feel as guilty about not exercising and then yesterday got back to the gym and did 40 mins on the elliptical. I wont be able to continue to go to the gym but I had a free trial so Im trying to make the most of it but really want to find a decent workout that I can do from home/around my neighborhood as I work full time and have my son to look after. I ate some hard boiled eggs, drank some v8, a banana and rice and a serving of triscuts. Im not sure if im eating properly or going about working out the "right way" (im looking to lose weight yes, but get more healthy and fit first and foremost), I want to drop the weight but in a healthy way and maintain/gain muscle mass so I get a lean look. Thought puting that info out there may help with any suggestions you guys may have as its a better insight into what ive been doing since starting my journey this monday. Thank you all again, I cant tell you how much I honestly appreciate it.
  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
    Move more, eat less.. Read about TDEE, BMR, water weight, fluctuations etc.. then just experiment with calorie numbers.. you don't need to restrict yourself to lose weight.. you just need to find your correct numbers.
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Never heard of any of those things except for the water weight/ retention so Ill definitely look those up! Thank you, its nice to hear I dont necessarily have to restrict a lot of calories to get healthier. Looking forward to the new information I obtain after looking that up! I have a long way to go but I'll get there this time around, especially with all the help and support from this site. So glad to have found this :)
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
    Welcome! A lot of people get really caught up in finding the "perfect" diet or exercise plan, but really in the beginning you just have to do something. Anything is better than nothing. (I don't mean to say that you're not doing anything -- I'm just trying to say that you don't need to worry about finding the exact perfect plan).

    For exercise, in the beginning just go outside and run around with your son. He'll love it and it will keep you motivated. There are a lot of workout programs you can do at home -- bodyweight exercises, cardio, etc. -- but at the beginning you just need to move more, however works for you.

    I am going to caution you about not making drastic changes to your diet right from the beginning. Nobody can live on salad without dressing and hard-boiled eggs forever! Why would you want to? You can still eat everything you like, including pizza, you just have to eat less of it. If you make a huge change and try to just eat "healthy food" (however you define that -- people usually think that just means dry veggies and boiled chicken or whatever), you're going to burn out really quickly. Your goal should be to eat as much food as possible while still losing weight, not to eat as little as you physically can.
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    I would advise starting here:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    Then, once you've digested that, take a look at some of the other posts linked from this one:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/833026-important-posts-to-read

    If you want a book, Dr. Yoni Freedhoff's brand-new book The Diet Fix is one of the few sane books on dieting.

    Basically, though, to lose weight you need to (1) eat less than your body burns, and (2) exercise enough that most of the weight you lose is fat. It's easy to say, but it can be very difficult to do. Good luck!
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    I am going to caution you about not making drastic changes to your diet right from the beginning.... Your goal should be to eat as much food as possible while still losing weight, not to eat as little as you physically can.

    ^^^^ This is excellent advice, by the way.
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Honestly I dont mind most "healthy foods" and so far this time around it seems to be working in my benefit because I find that I can eat a lot more of healthy foods than I can eating say some of the marketed diet foods etc out there that I have tried in the past. I think that as long as I can find a variety of easy ways to cook and make not so bland versions of those foods then Ill be okay. All of the other times in the past that I have tried to lose weight I was trying to eat what I was used to eating and limiting portions/calories but ended up still being hungry and would give up within a week or so. I never realized how much veggies I can eat at once and still be full without going crazy on calories etc and Im EXCITED about that lol Ive never been big on exercise, partially because Ive always been overweight and felt like everyone was staring at me while I struggled to do what seemed so easy for others and partially because it really is hard to get up and going without physically hurting almost instantly. Im trying to not let what others may think of me get in my way of success and push past the physical discomfort so that (hopefully) one day it wont hurt so much to do the exercises. Thank you for the warm welcome and kind words, the motivation seems to be doing wonders for me as Ive never had it in the past. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Thank you bwogilvie, Ill be sure to come back and give those links a read and see if I can find a copy of that book around here ( I love to read so why not start reading about something that pertains to my life eh?). Im going to go for a jog with my husband here shortly so Ill be sure to check that out and check back in when I get back home. Thank you!
  • beckytcy
    beckytcy Posts: 135 Member
    I was in a similar boat of being overweight all my life and didn't believe I could ever lose weight. I did weight watchers a few years back and went from 165 to 135. Now on mfp to lose a few more pounds. You can do it!!! I agree with other commenters that you shouldn't make drastic changes as you can't sustain them. Small changes really add up. For example I stopped putting cheese on my lunch sandwiches and I eat basically the same foods for dinner as I did before but smaller portions. The best food choices are those that take up a lot of space but aren't too high in calories, for example vegetables. Drink lots of water and most of all, be patient. It could take several months or even a year but it's worth it. Good luck!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    Thank you, seems to be that moderation is key!
  • healthygreek
    healthygreek Posts: 2,137 Member
    Tonilynn, you've gotten great advice here!
    I just want to add- don't be afraid of healthy fats!
    Add a bit of olive oil to your salad and veggies as the nutrients in these foods will be better absorbed into your body.
    Eat avocado, all kinds of nuts and nut butters.
    Eggs are great protein but you can cook them any way you like em!
    I love mixing in a tablespoon of Bellino pesto sauce into my veggies! It adds yummy flavor and gives me healthy fats!
    A tablespoon of grated peccorino Romano adds great flavor at only 25 calories!
    Salad is great but eat all kinds of fresh fruits and veggies for variety and lots of fiber and nutrients.
    Most of all- don't be afraid of any food (except transfat lol)!
    The less you restrict yourself, the less deprived you will feel and the more satisfied you will be.
    This will enable you to live this lifestyle for the rest of your life.
    Very simple. Eat less-move more! Don't starve yourself.
    When you start to exercise regularly-eat some of those exercise calories back.
    There is absolutely no need to be hungry!
    You can do this!
  • ToniLynnF
    ToniLynnF Posts: 15
    All I can say as of now is I really think I got this! lol Not expert "got this" but in the right mind state and now equipped with the knowledge to help me get to where I want to go. In the past Ive dreaded losing the weight (well dreaded what it took to get there) but this time around Im actually really happy about it. Like I feel a rush knowing that Im doing my body good if that makes sense. The tips and advice have been wonderful but honestly the new found friends and support is what I think is truly making this process successful this time around. I dont feel like Im going at this all alone. The motivation is really helping me stay focused and feel like its okay that it will take a while to get to where I want to be. It took 23 years to get to where I am now and Im ready and willing to take as much time as it takes to get to a point where I am healthy. Thank you guys again from the bottom of my heart. Your words are inspiring me to keep at it and it feels good. No, it feels great! Im sweaty and my muscles are twitching and I feel GREAT about that lol Thats a definite first for me and I owe a lot of it to the encouragement Ive received from the wonderful people on this site!

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