looking for help to help my 3yr old gain weight

Butter and Coconut Oil. You can sneak a lot of extra fat and calories into just her food....

oatmeal, toast, veggies, one chicken breast...

bread dipped in olive oil

The fats a pretty easy to use and can go on and in just about everything.

Chia seeds too... they pack a lot of calories and you can add to just about anything.

My kids (son 7 and daughter 3) have both been on the small side all their lives. I think the only time they were at the "50th" percentile was when they were born. After that they have been a 15% or less for weight. My pediatrician told me that as long as they are healthy they are fine.

Like another poster stated, the questions to ask is if your kid is regularly going to the bathroom, is active and is properly nourished? If the answers are yes it is likely they are just fine and burning off whatever they eat.

Something else to keep in mind is those percentiles are comparing your kids weight against a calculated average weight of all the other kids out there. The percentile chart is an arbitrary number that just looks at how your kids match up to all the others nationally. As a comparison, about 2 years ago I reached the top of my healthy goal weight as calculated for my height. I found a similar chart for adults like is used for kids. I found out that I am now in the 10th percentile of adults for weight.

The number is really meaningless. I would just keep feeding them healthy food and have healthy snacks available. I wouldn't worry about loading her up with high fat and calorie foods. It is harder to break bad habits (we all have them) to start with good ones.

As of yesterday she weighs 30pounds she will be four on two months her two almost three yr. old sister weighs 34.5 same height so thenunderweight daughter is not even on the charts right mow . still loving all the advice and support ...glad to see many have gone through this and your kids are still going strong . Seems I'm doing all I can do at this point . I'm going to focus all my extra will to this for the next couple of months and see where it takes me at the next checkup. There was a point when she was sickly when she was two but we have come a long way from that. And now being here on MFP I've learned A LOT as far as nutrition and balancing all types of food being key. I think we are on the right track and glad I came to this end of weight concerns to further my understanding :flowerforyou:

That actually doesn't seem that small. It's not really failure to thrive unless she is having issues with development etc.

One idea would to be make smoothies for her with yogurt, frozen fruit & milk, then add a packet of carnation instant breakfast vanilla for a little extra nutrition to it (healthier version of what I did for my dad when he was going through chemo, I made him milkshakes with an added packet of the instant breakfast)

My youngest child was also tiny, from about the 6 month mark she was in the bottom 0.2% of the UK growth charts. As she ate well, slept well and was meeting all her milestones, I trusted my instincts which were that she just takes after my husbands side of the family and is small. At 12 months she weighed 12.5 lb and at 18 months about 16 or so. I actually cant really remember as I made a conscious decision not to worry about it. The docs ruled out any underlying causes and came to the conclusion she is just a wee person. At three she now weighs 24 lb and is a wee dynamo. If your child is otherwise healthy, has plenty of energy and eats a balanced diet I wouldn't worry too much. I would not rush to stuff her full of fatty, salty food if it stops her from eating other, healthier options. It may also be worth considering that growth charts are not universal and there are some countries with lower 50th percentile marks. I believe (2nd child was born in US) that the UK chart is lower and lower again in some countries eg Japan.

My youngest was extremely small for his age, below 5th percentile for height and weight. I kept being told by the doctor that he was just small and that should be expected because my husband and I are not tall. Just to be sure he ordered a blood test to check his thyroid and growth hormone level, both tests were normal.

By the time he was five years old the disparity between him and his friends was extreme. He was still on the same growth curve but at this curve he was only growing an inch or less a year, two inches is considered normal. Our doctor closed his practice so we had to switch practices. At his first appointment I was ready to advocate for a referral to a pediatric endocrinologist to get a second opinion but I didn't need to - the pediatrician spoke to me about it before I had a chance to mention it.

It turns out he does not make enough growth hormone. The test our original doctor gave him has a large margin of error, the endocrinologist does a test that spans a couple hours where they measure the amount of growth hormone produced over time after they give a medication to stimulate the pituitary to produce growth hormone. We are now treating him and he receives a nightly injection of growth hormone. In the past year he has grown five inches, he finally looks his age, and he is moving up the growth charts getting closer to where he should be.

We are extremely happy with our decision to pursue why our son was so small and to treat him with the growth hormone injections. In addition to making children grow growth hormone is also important to the health of our skeletal and cardiovascular systems. Individuals who do not produce enough growth hormone and do not treat it are at an increased risk for osteoporosis, cardiovascular disease, and tend to have a shorter lifespan.

OP - maybe this does not apply to you, perhaps you just have a skinny little girl but maybe it will give you another avenue to pursue if you have additional concerns. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.
SJ

Oh, I feel for you! We used to dread each and every appointment with the public health nurse and with the cardiac nurse who used to track little man's blood pressure. The doctors/specialists fine, but the nurses usually left us feeling overwhelmed and incompetent because his weight/height were always at the lowest end of the percentile charts. While our reasons for going to the specialists were different, I remember how much I dreaded every visit with those nurses... until the day our pediatrician chuckled at my hand wringing and asked me if I looked in a mirror lately? Fortunately, he wasn't pointing out my weight... He was calling me short. (I'm 5'2) Then, that very kind man pulled out that dreaded percentile curve chart and pointed out that while it's true that he is smaller than most kids his age, he IS growing. He said he was meeting milestones and as long as he kept followed 'his own curve' than he wasn't concerned. Pointing to my height again, he said odds were against him hitting the 7' mark. LOL Then, a few weeks later the cardiac specialist commented that his size would concern her more if he was at the highest end of the range... That made me start to wonder if there was a poor mom out there with an infant at the 98th or 99th percentile taking heat because her precious son or daughter was "too big".

Hugs for you. It sounds like you're doing everything you can and you're exploring every option. Fantastic.

My daughter has a problem (she's also 3), where she will vomit in the morning if she doesn't get enough protein and calories in the afternoon and evening. She needs to eat carbs immediately when she's up with the problem. When it happens she won't eat for a few days because she's afraid of throwing up again (and they say low blood sugar also makes you feel not hungry), where she continues to have the problem. We've gone to the emergency room because her blood sugar dropped so much they were concerned she'd start seizing. It's terrifying whenever it happens, so we worry a lot about making sure she eats. She needs to eat SOMETHING at every meal (and with her in preschool she often is too busy to eat anything at lunch). So I've had to really rethink my "rules" for feeding the kids. My son is a healthy weight, unlike my daughter, and so I can't approach them in the same way, I'd hate for him to have the same problems I've had in my life with being overweight.

One of the biggest frustrations for me is that we now occasionally eat with the TV on. I hate it, but when I'm seriously worried about how much she's eaten I'll stick it on. And she eats. When she throws up in the morning I'll put the TV on so that I can get some carbs into her. I don't know if it would help you, but kids really will sit and eat in front of the TV, even healthy foods you normally couldn't get into them.

I also agree with the poster who recommended adding cheese to things. You can do that without adding a lot to the other kids' meals.

We also find that she really likes tacos and pizza and muffins and "eggs in a basket." But sandwiches she'll take apart and not eat (unless there's hummus). Oh, and clam chowder, which let us work in other soups. All of these things are things that I can make on the weekends and have for her during the week. I REFUSE to make more than one meal for everyone. But on nights that we have something like (my favorite) lentils, I add a ham and cheese muffin for the kids. And I've found recipes for making waffles with brown rice, which is bulky, and I've added flax seeds to everything I bake. And peanut butter. And lentils go in all our soups. Or beans.

I do make "chicken nuggets" with chicken breast and panko or crushed cheerios, or anything I might have on hand. And I feed hot dog octopuses to the kids (cut them in half both ways then slice two or three slices from the bottom halfway to the top, when you cook them they'll curl into legs). I'm not a huge fan of hot dogs and other convenience foods, but I've been so stressed with making sure that she eats and with my own health issues. Looking at different brands, I've been going with Aidell's chicken and spinach sausages.

And smoothies. She hates them. SOOOO much. I make them any way I can. Lots of honey, use straws. Everything. But she won't eat them. BUT she LOVES when I freeze them with a bit of greek yogurt and make them popsicles.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that finding what she loves and then adding bulk to it (peanut butter to baked goods, hummus to sandwiches and as dip, eggs to rice or pasta [scramble it a little bit first and it's hardly noticeable], beans, egg or any sort of protein to soup, adding meat and cheese to breads, etc.). That way you aren't stressing over what she'll eat, don't need to feed her things you're not a fan of, and don't have to do an insane amount of work or explaining to the other kids why she gets "special food." My son gets annoyed when she get peanut butter on apples, but never notices if I give her a bit more cheese or chicken on her entree.