RANT OVER UNHEALTHY PEOPLE JUDGING YOU

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  • jennaworksout
    jennaworksout Posts: 1,739 Member
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    yep
  • Snooozie
    Snooozie Posts: 3,447 Member
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    sometimes you just have to close your eyes, count to ten, take a deep breath, remind yourself that you wouldn't look good in prison stripes, and just smile at the dumbass and walk away. :laugh:
  • BridgetWolfbear
    BridgetWolfbear Posts: 21 Member
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    It gets so annoying when people do that! I got a juicer for my birthday and I had my sister tell me that I'm not "normal" because I could have anything I wanted and that is what I picked. On top of that I get into many arguments for watching what I eat and working out. Because I want to be healthy, and they think this is a problem?!
    I wouldn't worry about what other people think or say. Your happy, and healthy and doing what you love to do. When others try and put you down just smile and walk away. You go girl and keep on going! =)
  • kelsully
    kelsully Posts: 1,008 Member
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    I do find this annoying so I try to keep my habits and tendencies to myself. If people comment on things, like I bet over spring break all you will do is workout (yes that is correct) I just say, what a blessing it is to have the time to really enjoy a workout instead of just squeeze it in during my otherwise crazy life. If they want to judge me but I am proud or happy about what I am doing i just smile like a crazy person and keep them guessing.

    To the note of people asking advice and not taking it...they want something but are afraid. They are afraid they would feel deprived, they are afraid they would fail, they are afraid they would be unhappy so they ignore you or belittle your advice.
  • jmv7117
    jmv7117 Posts: 891 Member
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    Amazing how contagious lifestyle changes can be. I copped the same flack at work, people saying that it's a "health kick" and "wont last"...Now they ask me how i stay so fit and tell me about how they're going to the gym/running/dieting these days..pity they still wolf down KFC at lunch every other day, though

    Yes... What a pity. Good thing you're so much better than they are, huh?

    I often wonder, when these rants come up, whether the person ranting might be giving off judgmental vibes without meaning to do so.

    It could also be the person being ranted about may be projecting their own insecurities onto the person making the changes.
    This can cause a toxic relationship that really adds another stressor when trying to make lifestyle changes. In my case, I don't talk about making any changes, what I'm doing or not doing, or anything else. As mentioned I have one acquaintance that seriously can be a problem. She latches onto everything - hair, weight, clothes, why I should wear make-up, what I eat, and it just goes on and on. She really talks non-stop! The only way I deal with it is by not talking and avoidance. As far as anyone else, I'm not looking for support or acceptance of my choices but at the same time I don't really care what others eat or do. The only time I notice what someone is eating is occasionally at a restaurant and then it is the food itself that I'm interested in, not the person. Funny thing is, this type of thing comes up in a lot of aspects of life. I've heard comments about what others have in their shopping carts and for the life of me can't figure that out. I don't care what others have in their shopping cart!
  • FitnessLover001
    FitnessLover001 Posts: 188 Member
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    I haven't really had this problem, just a bit of good natured teasing if I decline a chocolate or something, best response is just to smile at that and move on, not take it too seriously..
    I wonder if you are taking some good natured teasing too seriously and others responded to that and it escalated from there?

    I don't expect others to say much about my food choices at all - and usually they don't - what somebody else eats isn't interesting to others for long if you don't mention it yourself.

    On the other hand I don't expect them to say 'Wow look at you go' either.

    Seems odd that you mentioned they should be saying this instead - which makes me think perhaps you have been going on about your lifestyle a bit and angling for such compliments ?
    Something to think about perhaps?

    Expecting them to say nothing and saying nothing yourself, unless directly asked, seems better approach to me.

    No, it's not good natured teasing when every time I see them they make a snide remark. This thread wasn't me ranting over how much better I am than others because I work out and eat healthy. And no I don't expect them to say "look at you go." because I don't go up to people and say "I worked out today, can you tell?" I don't even make a comment on it. But they always seem to look at me and say, "did you run today? You'll have horrible knees one day. Just wait until you're my age." I honestly don't expect them to say anything to me, positive or negative. But I feel like I am doing something positive with my life and no one should belittle me for it. Which, they do. And it seems like a lot of people experience the same thing as me.
  • Topsking2010
    Topsking2010 Posts: 2,245 Member
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    I think we've all been there at some point. Robert Downey Jr. said it best: "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f**k you were gonna do anyway."



    Well said!!
  • 20Grit
    20Grit Posts: 752 Member
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    I don't talk to people IRL about food, calories, or exercise unless they ask. I'm not open to their input so I don't even let that topic be open for discussion.

    That doesn't stop the occasional person from saying something annoying, but it definitely limits it.

    agree
  • erialcelyob
    erialcelyob Posts: 341 Member
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    Very irritating yes I agree
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,462 Member
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    There is a technique that you should perfect that I call "The art of listening without listening" and it is the ability to nod, make sympathetic noises and generally agree while not taking the slightest notice of what the other person is actually saying.

    I always think its worth trying :wink:

    This is a wise man.
  • SymphonynSonata
    SymphonynSonata Posts: 533 Member
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    People will always critique your efforts. Not to sound like a mother reassuring her little son, but seriously, they ARE just jealous. They don't like to see you succeeding where they are not, even if its as trivial as exercising. And if you DO do something that could raise an eyebrow they'll jump on that to further defame you so that they can feel better about themselves. It has happened time and time again for my ENTIRE life. I'm a nice person, I don't bother anyone, I just do my own thing and it still happens -all of the time-, so all that it could possibly be is jealousy.

    "You lost 100 pounds? Well you'll gain it all back!"
    "You lost 100 pounds? That's so unhealthy!" (Because being 100lbs overweight -is- healthy)
    "You lost 100 pounds? You're going to blow away!"

    Unfortunately, it seeps into every aspect of your life until you rid the judgmental from your life. It encompasses weight loss, sexuality, financial status, -everything.- That's, I think, why they say "birds of a feather flock together" - you need to find people in a similar situation as you to befriend, even if that means dropping old friends (after all, they're not really friends if they're being dbags anyway, right?)

    ETA: It's totally different if you're fishing for compliments, or asking for their opinions. But if they are just bringing **** up to say snide remarks, I'd seriously consider their position in my life and their general worth to my journey and if its worth taking up valuable time dwelling on the BS that spews out of their mouth. As long as you don't have a serious medical condition, keep on running! Let your doctor decide what is best for you, not some average Joe with a superiority complex. :)
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,874 Member
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    No, it doesn't bother me in the least. Why would I care what some unfit lard *kitten* has to say to me about health and fitness? I'm fit, they're not...nothing to discuss or get upset about really. In my experience, most people don't say anything to me anyway...what is there to say? I'm very fit and that just speaks for itself pretty much...I'm pretty sure the average or below average Joe would feel pretty stupid mocking my nutrition and fitness all things considered.

    Also, I do enjoy eating "healthy" and have a very nutritionally dense diet...but sometimes I do have fries with that.
  • knra_grl
    knra_grl Posts: 1,568 Member
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    Pretty much could care less about what people think.

    Fortuantely I have a great support system - most people tell me how great I am doing. I have many people that I talk to about what I am doing to lose weight and have tried to encouraged some to check out this site.

    Even at work - everyone knows that I get up early in order to get some exercise in before I go to work, part of that is a morning walk at the rec centre (it's too cold and sidewalks are icy and dangerous right now for outside walking). They always ask how my walk was and how many laps I go in etc.

    Maybe when it gets old for them they will quit asking but right now I think they like to see that I am doing this for myself with some success. :ohwell:
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
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    If you meet one person, and that person is a jerk, he's the jerk. If you meet a hundred people and they're all jerks, you're the jerk.
    -Harrison Ford
  • craftywitch_63
    craftywitch_63 Posts: 829 Member
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    I think we've all been there at some point. Robert Downey Jr. said it best: "Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever the f**k you were gonna do anyway."

    I love Robert Downey Jr. :love:

    +1
  • Noogynoogs
    Noogynoogs Posts: 1,028 Member
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    I used to get upset about what people said and thought of me. Since :smile: :smile: :smile: taking up meditation I don't care what people say. Even my hubby saying I had a fat *kitten* didn't get to me I just laughed.
  • craftywitch_63
    craftywitch_63 Posts: 829 Member
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    Does anyone else get FURIOUS at people who judge you for eating healthy??? And watching what you eat?? Or tell you that you're "too obsessive" over exercise and eating healthy and should "enjoy your life??"" I'm like BACK UP, I take pride in my work in the gym and kitchen and DO ENJOY EATING HEALTHY. Sorry I don't want fries with that???!?!

    The day anyone tells me I'm "too obsessive" over exercise and eating healthy, I'm hiding in my bomb shelter because it's an obvious sign of the Apocalypse.

    I do understand your point, though, OP, because I am very uncomfortable with anyone looking at me while I'm eating, judging or commenting on my food. Commenting on people's food, exercise, etc. is just rude anyway. If you are beating people over the head with your healthy lifestyle you are equally to blame.

    FPBEJk1.gif
  • shmulyeng
    shmulyeng Posts: 472 Member
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    Just this morning someone, who is not a close friend and has never had any weight issues, approached me and commented about how I was doing it too fast and I should back off. A friend standing nearby who also struggles with his weight turns around and tells him he has no right to an opinion.
  • Mugiwarah
    Mugiwarah Posts: 40
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    So you're using this thread as a cool off? If you take pride in it, you shouldn't get mad over such comments
  • tigerblue
    tigerblue Posts: 1,525 Member
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    Does anyone else get FURIOUS at people who judge you for eating healthy??? And watching what you eat?? Or tell you that you're "too obsessive" over exercise and eating healthy and should "enjoy your life??"" I'm like BACK UP, I take pride in my work in the gym and kitchen and DO ENJOY EATING HEALTHY. Sorry I don't want fries with that???!?!

    Like today I was told running long distances was terrible for you and I would have to have knee surgery and leg surgery when I got older and was basically belittled because I like running ten miles instead of being told, "Wow look at you go!" Like excuse me people, I love love LOVE being healthy and no I may not eat the entire serving of cake that is put on my plate, but that means I'm "too obsessive" and "worry about my weight too much" ?!?!?!?

    People can just piss you off, ya know?

    step back a second...

    what exactly is "eating healthy" and why do you think that the foods you choose to eat give you a position of moral superiority over the foods that others choose to eat? food is just fuel. if you're getting enough nutritional value from your food choices, then fries can be a regular part of your diet.

    of course, the foods you choose to eat are your business and nobody should be giving you a hard time so long as your diet is giving you the nutrients that you need. however, if you are disgusted when you see somebody else eating fries and you think that person is necessarily "unhealthy", then you're in the wrong too. that doesn't mean you're a bad person. it just means that you may be misinformed about the true nature of food and how your body uses it. your body doesn't care whether it gets what it needs from a diet that includes only so-called "healthy" foods or one that also includes so-called "unhealthy" foods. it simply goes to work breaking them down and extracting what it needs from them.

    You are right.

    However, why is it ok for someone to criticize my healthy choices but not okay for me to criticize their unhealthy ones. Both are wrong!

    I would not dream of going to an overweight person and saying, "I can't believe you are eating all that fattening food". But they think nothing of saying, "come on, loosen up a little and have this _______ ( insert junk food here.). Etc.".

    If someone approaches me and asks how I stay slim, I will tell them something like "mostly healthy food, most of the time and working out regularly" but even then I would never say something that would criticize their choices. I would just share my good choices.

    The problem is that so many people no longer know what basic manners are. And that doesn't mean saying yes ma'am/yes sir or holding a door. It means taking others' feelings into consideration in our interactions with them.

    And that includes online too, in my opinion.

    We can agree/disagree/discuss without being mean, sarcastic, or snarky. That is what good communication is all about. We, as a society, are losing sight of this fact.

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