Does any one get this?

When your friends, people you work with etc realise that you're losing weight, they comment excessively about it, i.e if you're eating a salad and they go "is that all you're having" etc
Also those who are healthy weight but want to lose a few pounds (like me), do you often get people say "oh you don't need to lose weight, you're a skinny minny"?

Personally, I find it quite annoying. I mean I may be okay weight to them, but I am not comfortable with my weight! I'm 5'2 and at 125lbs. I'm on the heavy range for my height. I'm losing weight because I would rather be in the middle of the BMI scale and also so my jeans would fit! My jeans feel rather snug and would like to get back my original weight of 119lbs.

When I told them I wanted to fit back into my jeans without them feeling too snug and buttons popping off, their response was "well go buy new ones a size up" ... pet peeve!
«1

Replies

  • LTKeegan
    LTKeegan Posts: 354 Member
    I got that a lot when I first started, I stopped telling people about it. It SUCKS to not be able to tell friends/coworkers about it. But literally everyone has something to say and often its out of a place of jealousy.

    If someone comments on your salad, you can always say "UGH! I ate SO MUCH PIZZA last night and I'm just really craving something green, ya know?" No one says anything about that.
  • kinni101
    kinni101 Posts: 38
    Hi i totally agree!!

    I am overweight and yet when i bring a salard into work its like ooo you just eating that? Hows the diet going, how much have you lost. IT all de motivates me!!

    I think there are two types of people who do this.

    1) the bone idle lazy ones who want to loose weight too but dont put the effort in, so when they see you are they have to have a comment.

    2) some who comment with good intentions. But really its not needed.

    My response- i need to loose weight and stick on. (and post on here to rant lol)

    Good luck!x
  • I got that a lot when I first started, I stopped telling people about it. It SUCKS to not be able to tell friends/coworkers about it. But literally everyone has something to say and often its out of a place of jealousy.

    If someone comments on your salad, you can always say "UGH! I ate SO MUCH PIZZA last night and I'm just really craving something green, ya know?" No one says anything about that.

    Good plan! I lost a lot of weight, a few years ago and my so called best friend kept saying I looked unhealthy and tried to feed me things like cupcakes!
  • Hi i totally agree!!

    I am overweight and yet when i bring a salard into work its like ooo you just eating that? Hows the diet going, how much have you lost. IT all de motivates me!!

    I think there are two types of people who do this.

    1) the bone idle lazy ones who want to loose weight too but dont put the effort in, so when they see you are they have to have a comment.

    2) some who comment with good intentions. But really its not needed.

    My response- i need to loose weight and stick on. (and post on here to rant lol)

    Good luck!x

    Haha, I noticed that too with the "lazy" people. They're the ones who are quicker to comment. I keep telling them that healthy eating and exrcise is a lifestyle, not just a one time thing.
  • wilmnoca
    wilmnoca Posts: 416 Member
    I would refuse to be self deprecating about it (saying I ate sooo much pizza last night). Instead say"is THAT what YOURE eating?"
  • jlshea
    jlshea Posts: 494 Member
    Definitely getting a lot of unsolicited "advice" from people. Its obnoxious. I think people feel the need to say things but I'm not sure why.
  • Bounce4
    Bounce4 Posts: 288 Member
    yes. A lot of 'gonna have to eat normal again sometime' and 'how much do you want to lose?!' and 'People eat more than that Dr. Oz says to eat 2000 calories'.

    I finally said - What do you mean going back to eating normal. Junk? Lunch at the gas station? I don't ever plan on going back to that. Are you suggesting that I should go back to that at some point? What is good about that?!

    I never heard that again.

    Also - "No, I'm not eating 'normal' amounts of food. No I'm not eating 2000 calories. I want to lose weight, not maintain. I have to burn more calories than I eat. I keep track of it ALL. I will go back to eating 2000 calories when I want to maintain the weight I'm at. I will keep losing until I am at a healthy weight - based on my size and doctor!

    So I quit hearing about that too.

    I heard a lot of 'well i'm doing this or that as if I was being extreme and logging food was ridiculous. Well I made no comment to that other than that it works for me - but I've quit hearing it because - wait for it - they haven't lost one pound.

    ETA: I also like the food I fix. I get 'you should do something for yourself' a lot. Well this is for me. It is me, taking time and effort and thought, to do something that is ALL for me. I pointed that out too. Don't give me a hard time about the one thing that is both for me and good for me. People just don't think.
  • I would refuse to be self deprecating about it (saying I ate sooo much pizza last night). Instead say"is THAT what YOURE eating?"

    teehee! imagine all the drama you'd get ;)! Although to be fair, if they can say it to you, why can't you say it to them.
  • yes. A lot of 'gonna have to eat normal again sometime' and 'how much do you want to lose?!' and 'People eat more than that Dr. Oz says to eat 2000 calories'.

    I finally said - What do you mean going back to eating normal. Junk? Lunch at the gas station? I don't ever plan on going back to that. Are you suggesting that I should go back to that at some point? What is good about that?!

    I never heard that again.

    Also - "No, I'm not eating 'normal' amounts of food. No I'm not eating 2000 calories. I want to lose weight, not maintain. I have to burn more calories than I eat. I keep track of it ALL. I will go back to eating 2000 calories when I want to maintain the weight I'm at. I will keep losing until I am at a healthy weight - based on my size and doctor!

    So I quit hearing about that too.

    I heard a lot of 'well i'm doing this or that as if I was being extreme and logging food was ridiculous. Well I made no comment to that other than that it works for me - but I've quit hearing it because - wait for it - they haven't lost one pound.

    people don't realise that keeping fit, losing weight works differently for others. I mean some people can just cut out the junk and lose, whilst others need that bit of help i.e counting calories. A lot of people I find always like to find the disadvantages of losing weight and calorie counting...it's really annoying.

    If I refuse lets say a cupcake at work, people always ask "why" and won't take a simple "I just don't fancy it" as an answer!
  • I've had a friend once say to her Aunty that her losing so much weight makes her look ill! When in fact she looked much healthier!
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    When I was a lot heavier, I didn't really diet or care that much about being fat -- for a long long time I was just used to being overweight. So I admit that when I saw healthy/slim women dieting and heard them talk about losing 5 lb I kind of inwardly rolled my eyes. But now I understand, ANYONE can want to change their body, lose weight, etc. It's not a bad thing!

    Once I was around 260 lb which was normal to me at the time...and I was talking with a coworker who weighed 130 but she was short, petite, and used to weighing 120. So for her, she was feeling "fat", she felt bloated and uncomfortable in her body and her clothes were tight on her. That would have been like me getting to 300 lb and feeling similarly (which happened, later on). Just because one person is still technically healthy and the other is obese...doesn't really make a major difference when it comes to how we feel!
  • mymodernbabylon
    mymodernbabylon Posts: 1,038 Member
    I have a few best answers:
    1. Why do you care?
    2. Why would you ask me that?
    3. What does it mean to you?
    4. That's what works for me.
    5. I'm happy with what I'm doing.

    If they keep asking after any or all of those 5, then I tell them to mind their own darn business.
  • When I was a lot heavier, I didn't really diet or care that much about being fat -- for a long long time I was just used to being overweight. So I admit that when I saw healthy/slim women dieting and heard them talk about losing 5 lb I kind of inwardly rolled my eyes. But now I understand, ANYONE can want to change their body, lose weight, etc. It's not a bad thing!

    Once I was around 260 lb which was normal to me at the time...and I was talking with a coworker who weighed 130 but she was short, petite, and used to weighing 120. So for her, she was feeling "fat", she felt bloated and uncomfortable in her body and her clothes were tight on her. That would have been like me getting to 300 lb and feeling similarly (which happened, later on). Just because one person is still technically healthy and the other is obese...doesn't really make a major difference when it comes to how we feel!

    You summed it all up right here! Everybody is different, feeling fat to someone may not mean fat to another person. I think people need to realise this.
    Also hurtful comments like "are you turning anorexic" is really harsh! I know a few people who have said it about others, and it's just cruel
  • khkjkk
    khkjkk Posts: 55 Member
    I'm lucky in that everyone in my office is working on getting in shape (if they aren't already). I've had those comments occasionally, but if I'm eating a salad, it is for the nutrients, not the calorie content. If you launch into a long-winded (slightly over-the-top and very enthusiatic) rant about the benefits of spinach/kale/carrots/broccoli enough times.... they stop questioning your food choices.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    When I was a lot heavier, I didn't really diet or care that much about being fat -- for a long long time I was just used to being overweight. So I admit that when I saw healthy/slim women dieting and heard them talk about losing 5 lb I kind of inwardly rolled my eyes. But now I understand, ANYONE can want to change their body, lose weight, etc. It's not a bad thing!

    Once I was around 260 lb which was normal to me at the time...and I was talking with a coworker who weighed 130 but she was short, petite, and used to weighing 120. So for her, she was feeling "fat", she felt bloated and uncomfortable in her body and her clothes were tight on her. That would have been like me getting to 300 lb and feeling similarly (which happened, later on). Just because one person is still technically healthy and the other is obese...doesn't really make a major difference when it comes to how we feel!


    You summed it all up right here! Everybody is different, feeling fat to someone may not mean fat to another person. I think people need to realise this.
    Also hurtful comments like "are you turning anorexic" is really harsh! I know a few people who have said it about others, and it's just cruel

    Yeah that is very cruel, I agree, and it makes light of those who have a real disorder.

    When I posted some photos recently of myself (1 yr progress) I had a couple of people say I should stop now or I'll look bad etc...I am still overweight and according to some charts, still obese. I weigh 191 at 5'8" and definitely need to lose at least 20-30 lb more before I'll be at a healthy weight. So I can see how hard it must be on those who are at a healthy weight and trying to lose.
  • Nachise
    Nachise Posts: 395 Member
    Short of saying, "Who died and made you my nutritionist?", I do believe that people need to know, sometimes bluntly, how rude it is to comment on a person's food intake. I told my husband that I appreciate his support, not his supervision, in my journey. As for co-workers, I tell them that if they do not want me to comment on how many calories are in that slice of pizza, or in that Wendy's Asiago Chicken sandwich with a medium order of fries, or in that Starbucks frappucino, or how much fat is in that order of shrimp alfredo, then they should stop commenting on my meals, my journey, my progress.

    People need to know when to stop being rude and to mind their own business.
  • ibjent
    ibjent Posts: 23 Member
    I'm 5'2 and when I lost down to 117 lbs (from 201) I had people tell me I 'looked sick'..... no I didn't I just didn't look like the whale I felt like I was before! People are just as cruel when you are skinny or fat. Maybe more so when you are skinny. They think that it's okay to tell you they think you need a cheeseburger before they would tell you to put down the cupcake when the seams of your size 20's are screaming!

    I commend you for getting those few pounds off before they become lots of pounds to get off.

    Be healthy. For you. :)
  • When I was a lot heavier, I didn't really diet or care that much about being fat -- for a long long time I was just used to being overweight. So I admit that when I saw healthy/slim women dieting and heard them talk about losing 5 lb I kind of inwardly rolled my eyes. But now I understand, ANYONE can want to change their body, lose weight, etc. It's not a bad thing!

    Once I was around 260 lb which was normal to me at the time...and I was talking with a coworker who weighed 130 but she was short, petite, and used to weighing 120. So for her, she was feeling "fat", she felt bloated and uncomfortable in her body and her clothes were tight on her. That would have been like me getting to 300 lb and feeling similarly (which happened, later on). Just because one person is still technically healthy and the other is obese...doesn't really make a major difference when it comes to how we feel!


    You summed it all up right here! Everybody is different, feeling fat to someone may not mean fat to another person. I think people need to realise this.
    Also hurtful comments like "are you turning anorexic" is really harsh! I know a few people who have said it about others, and it's just cruel

    Yeah that is very cruel, I agree, and it makes light of those who have a real disorder.

    When I posted some photos recently of myself (1 yr progress) I had a couple of people say I should stop now or I'll look bad etc...I am still overweight and according to some charts, still obese. I weigh 191 at 5'8" and definitely need to lose at least 20-30 lb more before I'll be at a healthy weight. So I can see how hard it must be on those who are at a healthy weight and trying to lose.

    Most people that have commented my weight loss have been those who eat pizza, and junk everyday. So I guess there's some sort of jealousy thing going on
  • amtatusko
    amtatusko Posts: 16 Member
    When your friends, people you work with etc realise that you're losing weight, they comment excessively about it, i.e if you're eating a salad and they go "is that all you're having" etc
    Also those who are healthy weight but want to lose a few pounds (like me), do you often get people say "oh you don't need to lose weight, you're a skinny minny"?

    Personally, I find it quite annoying. I mean I may be okay weight to them, but I am not comfortable with my weight! I'm 5'2 and at 125lbs. I'm on the heavy range for my height. I'm losing weight because I would rather be in the middle of the BMI scale and also so my jeans would fit! My jeans feel rather snug and would like to get back my original weight of 119lbs.

    When I told them I wanted to fit back into my jeans without them feeling too snug and buttons popping off, their response was "well go buy new ones a size up" ... pet peeve!

    Here are a few observations I have had:

    1) Most people aren't even aware of what a healthy diet looks like - physically. Portion sizes are usually double or triple what they need to be when we eat out. The ratio of vegetables and fruits to everything else is totally wrong and most people have no basis by which to make a judgement. So when they see you eating a balanced meal consisting of nearly all vegetables, they have no concept of what they are eating and what you are eating looks strange.

    2) It is difficult to eat well! This is especially true when we eat out. The calorie content of most of our foods is absurd. You can pound one burrito that will suck up 650 calories in one shot and will leave you feeling hungry just 3 hours later. Add to that the deadly combo of fat and sugar in nearly everything, and that adds to the awareness issue.

    So three weeks ago I decided to exclude all meat from my diet with the exception of some wild caught fish like salmon. It's just too good for me to cut it out. I cut way back on dairy by not buying much cheese unless it is low fat and switching to almond milk. Lent prompted that decision, but also the fact that I want to be able to run and play with my kids and grandkids without the need of blood thinners, cholesterol meds, heart meds, hypertension meds, etc. I want a good quality of life without pharmeceutical chemistry when I am 70 or 80.

    Many have thought this to be a strange move. So this leads to observation three:

    3) Most people don't know what to eat if it does not include meat! Again, do a survey of cookbooks and entrees at restaurants. Find the vegan dishes as a place to start. Then look for vegetarian dishes not loaded with processed carbs and cheeses. Hard to do.

    The point is that people aren't just looking at your diet as something strange, but many people aren't even aware that this is how everyone should eat!
  • Of_Monsters_and_Meat
    Of_Monsters_and_Meat Posts: 1,022 Member
    This is why I tell people I'm training.

    If I'm eating something out of the ordinary or doing something odd.

    Them "Hey, why are you eating that thing? you on a diet bro?"

    Me, "Hey I'm training. its a program specifically designed for the training goals."

    Them "Oh, good luck, you gonna win?"


    Otherwise I get

    Them "hey why you eating all that bacon?"

    Me "I'm on a diet"

    Them" OMFMG! Let me tell you, I saw this thing on Dr Oz."
    etc... etc... etc... .. Raspberry KETONES!!!
  • When your friends, people you work with etc realise that you're losing weight, they comment excessively about it, i.e if you're eating a salad and they go "is that all you're having" etc
    Also those who are healthy weight but want to lose a few pounds (like me), do you often get people say "oh you don't need to lose weight, you're a skinny minny"?

    Personally, I find it quite annoying. I mean I may be okay weight to them, but I am not comfortable with my weight! I'm 5'2 and at 125lbs. I'm on the heavy range for my height. I'm losing weight because I would rather be in the middle of the BMI scale and also so my jeans would fit! My jeans feel rather snug and would like to get back my original weight of 119lbs.

    When I told them I wanted to fit back into my jeans without them feeling too snug and buttons popping off, their response was "well go buy new ones a size up" ... pet peeve!

    Here are a few observations I have had:

    1) Most people aren't even aware of what a healthy diet looks like - physically. Portion sizes are usually double or triple what they need to be when we eat out. The ratio of vegetables and fruits to everything else is totally wrong and most people have no basis by which to make a judgement. So when they see you eating a balanced meal consisting of nearly all vegetables, they have no concept of what they are eating and what you are eating looks strange.

    2) It is difficult to eat well! This is especially true when we eat out. The calorie content of most of our foods is absurd. You can pound one burrito that will suck up 650 calories in one shot and will leave you feeling hungry just 3 hours later. Add to that the deadly combo of fat and sugar in nearly everything, and that adds to the awareness issue.

    So three weeks ago I decided to exclude all meat from my diet with the exception of some wild caught fish like salmon. It's just too good for me to cut it out. I cut way back on dairy by not buying much cheese unless it is low fat and switching to almond milk. Lent prompted that decision, but also the fact that I want to be able to run and play with my kids and grandkids without the need of blood thinners, cholesterol meds, heart meds, hypertension meds, etc. I want a good quality of life without pharmeceutical chemistry when I am 70 or 80.

    Many have thought this to be a strange move. So this leads to observation three:

    3) Most people don't know what to eat if it does not include meat! Again, do a survey of cookbooks and entrees at restaurants. Find the vegan dishes as a place to start. Then look for vegetarian dishes not loaded with processed carbs and cheeses. Hard to do.

    The point is that people aren't just looking at your diet as something strange, but many people aren't even aware that this is how everyone should eat!

    Some of which is true, but there can be a lot of haters out there, especially those who tell everyone else in the office, and make snide jokes about losing too much weight etc
  • LTKeegan
    LTKeegan Posts: 354 Member
    I would refuse to be self deprecating about it (saying I ate sooo much pizza last night). Instead say"is THAT what YOURE eating?"

    teehee! imagine all the drama you'd get ;)! Although to be fair, if they can say it to you, why can't you say it to them.


    One of the biggest things I've noticed since starting to count calories/diet is that everyone who knows and is supportive feels the need to justify what they're eating to me. I wouldn't want to encourage that any more. Like one of my best friends who lost a ton of weight (that she didn't have to lose) from getting a parasite in Africa now justifies eating pizza to me. She NEEDS the pizza, actually. Yet she still feels the need to justify it. I understand not wanting to be self deprecating, but sometimes its hard to balance being rude and being direct. And just because someone is rude to you, doesn't (sadly) give you the right to be rude back.
  • laurie04427
    laurie04427 Posts: 421 Member
    If anyone asks I just say I'm on a health kick at the moment. I don't say I'm trying to lose weight. That way they ususally don't give me any advice on how Atkins worked great for them etc etc.
  • ShellyBell999
    ShellyBell999 Posts: 1,482 Member
    Most people ask me how can I eat and drink so much and still look fit n healthy.
  • lesteidel
    lesteidel Posts: 229 Member
    Explain to them you value your health and so wish to get in all of your veggies,
  • amtatusko
    amtatusko Posts: 16 Member
    When I was a lot heavier, I didn't really diet or care that much about being fat -- for a long long time I was just used to being overweight. So I admit that when I saw healthy/slim women dieting and heard them talk about losing 5 lb I kind of inwardly rolled my eyes. But now I understand, ANYONE can want to change their body, lose weight, etc. It's not a bad thing!

    Once I was around 260 lb which was normal to me at the time...and I was talking with a coworker who weighed 130 but she was short, petite, and used to weighing 120. So for her, she was feeling "fat", she felt bloated and uncomfortable in her body and her clothes were tight on her. That would have been like me getting to 300 lb and feeling similarly (which happened, later on). Just because one person is still technically healthy and the other is obese...doesn't really make a major difference when it comes to how we feel!

    You summed it all up right here! Everybody is different, feeling fat to someone may not mean fat to another person. I think people need to realise this.
    Also hurtful comments like "are you turning anorexic" is really harsh! I know a few people who have said it about others, and it's just cruel

    Good points. Last year the doc told me I was overweight. Me? Nah. I thought the entire BMI index was wrong. A year later and a totally different mindset. I felt bloated and sluggish. I wasn't sleeping well and need five cups of coffee each day just to stay awake. I smoked when I got anxious and had no will even to walk the dog because I didn't have the energy - poor girl. I was depressed most of the time and ate fast food, ice cream, and came home to binge watch Netflix with a massive bowl of popcorn. 26 BMI and growing.

    Then I did a two day juice detox and have changed my palette with practice to eat well. Now I eat and like something like sauteed kale on sticky rice :) I have more energy, sleep great, am mostly positive, am more productive, and my dog is happy since we walk at least two miles a day and this is in addition to my 30 minute cardio blitz during lunch.

    It's a good life!
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Not really...aside from a bit of "locker room" ribbing. Most of the people I know wish they could be about 1/2 as dedicated to fitness and nutrition as I am...most of them are jelly and ask for pointers and tips. They know that I'm not on a "diet" though...this is just the way I roll.
  • Fiercely_Me
    Fiercely_Me Posts: 481 Member
    I would refuse to be self deprecating about it (saying I ate sooo much pizza last night). Instead say"is THAT what YOURE eating?"

    That is the best comeback ever! I can't wait to use it.

    Some people do comment because they are truly concerned, but from my experience, most are jealous and want you to be unhealthy just like them. After all, misery loves company.
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
    I tell people "once it starts getting warm outside, the only things I want to eat are fresh veggies and fruits" or "produce looks so good this time of year, I want to eat as much as I can while it's still in season." Re-frame the conversation, so it's not that you're eating diet food, it's that you're eating things that are yummy and delicious.
  • hazenson
    hazenson Posts: 22 Member
    THis reminds me of one of the best sayings I think Ive ever heard. My wife used to watch desperate houswives years ago and I sat down and watched some with her one night. This fella asked this incredably in shape blond if she would go have a pizza with him some night. She lookes him straight in the eye and says, You seriously think pizza would ever go into this body?? Smiled and walked away.- For some reason that stuck with me and I try to think more like that .