Anyone feel bashed for "gaining weight" ?
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I get told by my mother in law all the time I don't need to lose anymore weight..and I am at 160lbs...I tell her that and she doesn't believe it...
What struck me with this is I have a lot of slim friends...fit slim...who are called ugly names by other women...
she is such a skinny b*tch...it's not fair......:sad: :sad: :sad:
What's not fair is all my friends exercise their *kitten* off to be that slim...and it doesn't make them b*tches...nor does it make it unfair...
It is all jealousy talking...if I am ever told that...god forbid...cause I don't hold stuff back I would say...really it's not fair I use a kitchen scale, weigh all my food and exericse 5x a week to look like this while you sit on your *kitten* and eat whatever you want in whatever portion you want...hmmm
Seems fair to me.
*As you can tell this sort of thing ticks me off...not fair..psh...if people only knew the half of how "we" get here...0 -
size is not indicative of strenght or ability (meaning size 0 or 1 or 2)
I just say that's nice- but I"m not interested in my size 0 pants- I'm interested in my size 300 deadlift.
remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
People who are athletes and aren't just working out- they are training- it's a completely different field and the others don't understand this- they probably never will. So you can say- well you can be content to just be "not fat" but that's not my life. I work hard for what I have- and that's all that matter- quadrazilla rex doesn't care either I have been asked many times what I am training for- or if I am training. I say yes- to be the most ****ing fabulous person ever- and if there is ever a competition for most ****ing fabulous- I will- without a doubt win.
Above all remember
A lion does not concern himself with the opinions of sheep.0 -
You are NOT alone in this.
I once said I was looking to gain weight to another woman and replied sarcastically, "Well, that's a nice problem to have now isn't it?"
But it's really not so easy at all because when you say "I want to gain weight" you mean "gain lean muscle mass." So, I'd second what others have said: a lot of people think that the ONLY thing that matters is what the scale says and that "weight is weight." (I thought that too at one point.)
Putting on muscle mass is HARD WORK.
And I think it's harder for women because our bodies are like "quick, store fat for teh babies!"0 -
"If I was a size 0 I would drive right past the gym."
These kind of people are a special kind of stupid. The benefits to working out go far beyond weight loss...in fact, exercise is highly overrated for weight loss.
I exercise to get stronger and faster and just all around better. To that end, I know far more about nutrition and fitness than pretty much anyone I come into regular contact with...so as soon as they start jabbing I pretty much go into smile and nod mode unless I know that they are someone what actually knows what the **** they're talking about...
In general, I find the greater part of the population to just be generally ignorant anyway...just in general...not even where fitness and nutrition are concerned...just kinda generally stupid. So I spend a lot of time looking like this...
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size is not indicative of strenght or ability (meaning size 0 or 1 or 2)
I just say that's nice- but I"m not interested in my size 0 pants- I'm interested in my size 300 deadlift.
remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
People who are athletes and aren't just working out- they are training- it's a completely different field and the others don't understand this- they probably never will. So you can say- well you can be content to just be "not fat" but that's not my life. I work hard for what I have- and that's all that matter- quadrazilla rex doesn't care either I have been asked many times what I am training for- or if I am training. I say yes- to be the most ****ing fabulous person ever- and if there is ever a competition for most ****ing fabulous- I will- without a doubt win.
Above all remember
A lion does not concern himself with the opinions of sheep.
I love this answer.0 -
derp...sorry I thought you said LOSING not gaining. My error!
(What I wrote was nice, but targeted more toward what to say about losing weight when you're already very thin to not offend those of us who are larger)0 -
remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
This is very true. I think I may have been like this at one point. I wasn't always thin, and now it's like okay, I cant put on weight and I am so weak. Just Yesterday I was talking to a friend and I groaned as I sat down. I had just gotten done with a workout and had mentioned to her. She says, "Why are you working out, there's nothing to you."
I felt pretty good when I smiled and said, "Exactly, that's why I'm trying to add something!"0 -
remember- most people have no concept of weight other than to lose weight- and "to not be fat"- or to be a "little toned."
This is very true. I think I may have been like this at one point. I wasn't always thin, and now it's like okay, I cant put on weight and I am so weak. Just Yesterday I was talking to a friend and I groaned as I sat down. I had just gotten done with a workout and had mentioned to her. She says, "Why are you working out, there's nothing to you."
I felt pretty good when I smiled and said, "Exactly, that's why I'm trying to add something!"
uhg- it makes me so sad/angry/mad/frustrated- mangry? sad-strated? is there- confused/frustrated- confrustrated?
working out is not about weight loss. sigh. one person at a time- we shall change the world!!!0 -
I have a friend who's the same way. She gets funny looks because she pays close attention to her macros and weighs her food. People always say "Really?" When I'm with her I always say "Really. What's it to you?" But then again, I'm rather blunt and aggressive.
I you greentart!0 -
YES! I'm not even trying to 'gain' or 'lose' weight, I'm trying to lose body fat/gain muscle. People don't understand the difference! I work my butt off in the gym and try to better my eating habits every day and all i get every day "stop losing weight. skinny minnie. skinny girl"
Sometimes I just smile in their face and leave them be in their state of ignorance. I'm doing what makes me happy, not them.
(plus they haven't seen me naked =O lol)
I read this article about how people get offensive if you yell out "hey fat girl!" or "hey you need to lose weight!" but why don't people understand how its offensive when you yell " hey skinny girl!" or "stop losing weight!" How come curvy ladies are allowed to 'embrace their curves and extra cushion' but us slim and slender ladies cannot embrace our natural body structure?!?!0 -
F#$k the haters. Just dont ever mention anything if they are going to be like that. Do your own thing and don't mention a damn thing about it.0
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I think a lot of people confuse skinny with healthy. Someone could be 100 pounds and have plugged arteries from all the bacon cheeseburgers they eat. I also know many heavier people that are the picture of health. Bottom line: You are the expert on your body. If you feel like you would be healthier with more weight/muscle - that's what you should do.0
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I've stopped getting into conversations about exercise with most people I know. I workout hard day because I want to add muscle and everyone else I know seems to be wanting to lose weight. So if I start talking about getting enough protein, or lack of time to exercise, or anything really, I get told "you don't need to worry about that, you're skinny." It's not about skinny for me, it's about being healthy and that's where the conversation should be. But unfortunately it's not like that.0
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I've gotten the, "You're already thin, you'll look sick if you lose anymore." Like gee thanks...Sadly it was my grandmother who made that particular comment. A lot of people on this thread have used the, "Wouldn't that be a nice problem to have" comment that has been made to them and I hear this a lot too. Why I yes I love being skinny and feeling like a shaking chihuahua because I have little to know fat when winter comes. I'm not called sexy, just skinny.0
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I feel sorry for you women who have to explain about gaining weight to other women. At least, it is sort of a normal thing for a guy to say.
I have said this before but losing fat is about a million times easier than gaining muscle (ESPECIALLY for women). I think if more people knew this, they wouldn't be so quick to judge those trying to gain weight. (good weight obviously)0 -
I'm not where I'd want to gain; you can see from my ticker that I've still got a small amount of weight left to my goal. People will always feel the need to weigh in, no pun intended. You've just got to let it roll off of you. For the longest time, people kept asking me how I was doing it, but now that I'm pretty much done I'm now getting comments like "oh.... you still go to the gym?" or "Oh, you still keep track of your food?" and my fave "you're done."
They are OUR bodies. WE know what's best for them. Ignore the haters and the nosy people who give unsolicited opinions.0 -
I've gotten the, "You're already thin, you'll look sick if you lose anymore." Like gee thanks...Sadly it was my grandmother who made that particular comment.
I don't talk about nutrition or fitness with most people, because I really don't want to hear how your mom's cousin's hairdresser lost 150 pounds eating nothing but blue foods, but if you bring it up in a b*tchy way, it's ON. I don't like being confrontational, so I'd rather say something that's outwardly polite but has a little dig. It's actually fun saying things like "You really have no idea how difficult it can be for me to put on weight! I've been eating everything in sight, but I haven't been able to gain an ounce!"0 -
I feel sorry for you women who have to explain about gaining weight to other women. At least, it is sort of a normal thing for a guy to say.
I have said this before but losing fat is about a million times easier than gaining muscle (ESPECIALLY for women). I think if more people knew this, they wouldn't be so quick to judge those trying to gain weight. (good weight obviously)
I was not completely surprised- I felt like I was going to have to do more explaining- but it definitely happens. It's so laughably hard to put on size for women.
I think when you are already in a place that appears to be fit and you explain you have a new goal for that- it's easier- people can see that you are doing something that works (or was working)- I love when people think I'm some sort of crazed health nut and then go "oh you can't be eating that!!!"
say what?
my quad's say otherwise. it's exhausting.0 -
I'm five foot and 84 lbs. It's terrible. And I still get people wishing they looked like me or had my problems. Then I'll say that I wish I could have their extra fifteen lbs. I wish people would stop glorifying everyone else's bodies and focus on their own. I have been struggling to gain weight for a really long time now and people don't see why. I tell them I'm underweight and they think of it like it's something good or enviable. They don't understand when I say all the things wrong with me that it is because of my weight, they don't see it as something bad.0
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People say all kinds of stupid stuff but you don't have to get into the conversation. I talk to very few people about my fitness and nutrition goals and if they make comments I just smile and move on. What you are doing is really none of their business and you shouldn't feel compelled to divulge information.0
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I guess this post is more geared towards the ladies.
But I am 105 and 5 feet tall. I don't want to gain weight persay, but I want to get toned and that will put weight on me and I am okay with that. If I lose anymore I might start to look unhealthy.
Anyways, people always bash me. "You don't need to lose weight." "If I was your size I would eat whatever I want." "If I was a size 0 I would drive right past the gym." If I even talk about wanting to workout, or eating to tone up, I get criticized. Especially with he dreaded, "I WISH I had that problem." Comment.
It makes me feel self conscious, like I shouldn't talk, or that I should be ashamed of myself.
Anyone else deal with this?
No, I don't deal with that. I guess sometimes people will say.. to be nice.. you don't need to loose weight. OBVIOUSLY I DO. i'm 5'4 and 200 pounds... However, I have conscience of ladies who may be too thin and need help gaining. It goes both ways.. totally get that. You just have to be comfortable with yourself and know that when people comment without thinking.. they are doing just that.. not thinking. This is why woman and men can be so hard on themselves... We have to take control of our own minds and somehow, block out the negativity in people. Good luck to you!0 -
I am 5'4" and weigh 120 lbs and come from a family of "eaters". They can't get together without food being involved. I only eat one meal a day and need to put on some weight but don't have the appetite that my family does. I just want to get a routine where I eat 3 meals a day. I am ridiculed every day for not wanting to gorge myself on doughnuts or chips or junk food!0
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Glad that you are friendly enough and comfortable enough to talk....welcome to the "food club".....0
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DianeLynn
do not listen to those people. When I was real thin I had so many people saying the same thing to me. I was so mad one time and told them this " if i listen to what you say therefore I will ended up looking like you" that shut them up. Now sad to say I am a humpthy dumpty that looks like them now, and need to get the fat off. I started eating the carbs and not being faithful with any work outs. Years ago I could eat anything never put an ounce on, a s I became older I let the fat creep on . Now I need to do something.
take care0 -
Haha I wish I did have that problem, but I'd be like, "Hey I want to go lift with you!" You just need more friends like me! Don't feel bad. It's just that no one likes an overachiever lol. All you have to say is I'm always looking to improve my health and I enjoy my time at the gym. And that should be that. I find that in the real world a lot of people want the results without the work and that's why people make comments.0
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Why has exercising become something you only do if you are trying to lose weight? Everyone should exercise - for their health and well being. It isn't just about losing weight. There are benefits for everyone - heart health, mental health, too many benefits to mention.
Personally, I don't discuss weight loss, exercise, diet etc with anyone. I've belonged to a gym for over a year and not one person at my work knows that. Heck, I'm training for a 1/2 marathon and only one person knows that - my cousin, who is training with me.
. I just don't discuss it. To discuss it opens you up to critics, opinions, and other garbage I just don't care to deal with. There is one woman at work who constantly talks about her "diet" and how she has no time to exercise. I know I'm sick of hearing about it, I'm sure others are as well. What makes me think people wouldn't feel the same way if I were the one doing the talking?
So go to the gym, do what you need to do for you and if you have to be quiet about it, be quiet. Who cares what others think? You do what you need for you.0 -
I guess this post is more geared towards the ladies.
But I am 105 and 5 feet tall. I don't want to gain weight persay, but I want to get toned and that will put weight on me and I am okay with that. If I lose anymore I might start to look unhealthy.
Anyways, people always bash me. "You don't need to lose weight." "If I was your size I would eat whatever I want." "If I was a size 0 I would drive right past the gym." If I even talk about wanting to workout, or eating to tone up, I get criticized. Especially with he dreaded, "I WISH I had that problem." Comment.
It makes me feel self conscious, like I shouldn't talk, or that I should be ashamed of myself.
Anyone else deal with this?
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
I am a guy and I get similar crap.
I would appreciate people just keep their mouth shut honestly.
If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.....
Of course I am guessing they think they are giving you a compliment.....but it isn't one.....for the person receiving it.
I have just gotten to the point where I just ignore them and go on about my business.
My life, my body, my choices.
They don't want me telling them how to eat, so then don't say anything about how I eat.0 -
One of the girls whom I work out with is trying to gain weight as well. She's 5'5'' and weighs 103 lbs. She started doing weight lifting with me. We call each other Batman and Robin. Our weight training coach told her she needs to eat at least 1.5 grams of protein per pounds of body to gain weight. She's doing a fabulous job right now and I love seeing her surpass her goals, no matter how small because improvement is improvement. It's very difficult for her to gain, but at the same time, she's making the effort.
As for me, I'm 5'7" and weigh 160 lbs. My goal weight is to get back to 140 lbs. When I was in the army, I weighed in at that (140lbs) and I could do 100 push-ups in 2 mins, 87 sit-ups in 2 mins, and ran my 2 miles in 16 mins. I even once ran a 1/2 marathon in 1.5 hrs. Many people tell me I "look fine" but it's not about that. It's about getting my physical strength back and being able to do what I was once capable of. Even at that weight, and with a mere 15% body fat, I was told by "skinny-fat" girls that I was "obese". They didn't care what I could do, all they paid attention to was a number.
We all have goals, so find people who support you! And then tell the haters go suck a d*** if they wanna open their open mouth with negative comments.0 -
..0
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"If I was a size 0 I would drive right past the gym."
"No, idiot, you'd be driving to the gym daily or you'd never be a size '0' in the first place." ignore people like this. they do not understand how fitness works and they are lame.0
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