now I'm too skinny?? wtf!!
jardimgirl
Posts: 522 Member
I used to weigh 145 and for being 5'0 that was overweight. Family members would say I'm getting fat ans was even asked by a family friend if I was pregnant, twice! So since then, I took action. I counted my calories and excersised. It has been 7 months now, I have lost 30 pounds and now weigh 115. I'm still eating at a small deficit because ni still need to get rid of some belly fat and am doing stronglifts. Anyways, I went to my nephews birthday party and was told by many that I'm too skinny now and if I continue with what I'm doing I could get sick and possibly get a disease of some sort. That freaked me out, yet the same time I felt awkward. I feel better with how I look and I'm still trying to become toned, so what should I do? Plus an aunt and friend said no matter what I will not get a flat belly for me to just stop it.
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I used to weigh 145 and for being 5'0 that was overweight. Family members would say I'm getting fat ans was even asked by a family friend if I was pregnant, twice! So since then, I took action. I counted my calories and excersised. It has been 7 months now, I have lost 30 pounds and now weigh 115. I'm still eating at a small deficit because ni still need to get rid of some belly fat and am doing stronglifts. Anyways, I went to my nephews birthday party and was told by many that I'm too skinny now and if I continue with what I'm doing I could get sick and possibly get a disease of some sort. That freaked me out, yet the same time I felt awkward. I feel better with how I look and I'm still trying to become toned, so what should I do? Plus an aunt and friend said no matter what I will not get a flat belly for me to just stop it.
jealous people are *kitten*...just ignore them.0 -
At 5' tall you would have to be well under 100lbs to be considered unhealthy and underweight. Focus on the mirror and bf%, as that will tell you more than any scale.0
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ignore them...that wasn't nice at all I am sure you look great.0
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Maybe they're just concerned.I used to weigh 145 and for being 5'0 that was overweight. Family members would say I'm getting fat ans was even asked by a family friend if I was pregnant, twice! So since then, I took action. I counted my calories and excersised. It has been 7 months now, I have lost 30 pounds and now weigh 115. I'm still eating at a small deficit because ni still need to get rid of some belly fat and am doing stronglifts. Anyways, I went to my nephews birthday party and was told by many that I'm too skinny now and if I continue with what I'm doing I could get sick and possibly get a disease of some sort. That freaked me out, yet the same time I felt awkward. I feel better with how I look and I'm still trying to become toned, so what should I do? Plus an aunt and friend said no matter what I will not get a flat belly for me to just stop it.
jealous people are *kitten*...just ignore them.0 -
I know they're your family members and all, but to me this smells a bit like jealousy. And your aunt is wrong. Congrats on losing the 30 pounds and your healthy weight now! That is an accomplishment. Don't worry about people hating.0
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ignore them or tell them off,I would as it would make me feel better..lol..and as for the belly fat,you can get a flat ripped stomach,,many girls on MFP are living proof of that!0
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OP: I am also getting the same thing from family members, to the point of calling me names. Ignore them, they are just jealous of you.0
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Jardimgirl.
Give your family some time to get used to the new you. I recently went through this myself. If your feeling pressure from your family I would recommend staying at maintenance for a while...give your body some time to accept its new body composition as permanent. This will also give your family time to adjust to the new you as well. It sounds like you are doing things the right way. Keep exercising, eat healthy, rest...before you know it people wont be bugging you anymore. They will come to realize this is how you are...in fact they will soon forget how you used to be. Stay strong...it will pass.
Hope everything goes well.0 -
Thank you all so much. I'm glad to hear others have gone through a similar situation and that now all is well. This really means a lot to me0
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....Plus an aunt and friend said no matter what I will not get a flat belly for me to just stop it.
Your friend is not a very good friend. And I want to teach your aunt some manners. Or something. I am leaning toward something.
Listen to the good people here about your BMI and go to the message board that have to do with lifting and strength training. Pay less attention to the scale (it will go up some) and more attention to building muscle and getting stronger (you will). Then, at the next family reunion, invite your aunt to bounce a quarter off your fantastically flat belly.
Some people.0 -
Wow. They were mean. Keep up the good work and be proud of what you are doing.0
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Families can often feel they have the right to say anything to you without considering how it might make you feel. I've lost about a stone and a half now although I'm still at least another stone over a healthy weight. Yet everytime I see my mother, she makes a point of telling me I'm too skinny and that I should stop trying to lose weight. While objectively I know this simply isn't true, it used to upset me a lot at first. Now I just try my best to ignore it and get on with what I want to do.
Well done on your weight loss and good luck achieving a body you're happy with.0 -
People sometimes just don't know what to say to someone who's lost weight. If they acknowledge that you've lost a lot, they might feel they're being awkward by implying you were way fat before. They might think it's a compliment to say you're too thin. Who knows? Shrug it off and carry on. Great job on your weight loss!0
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I know they're your family members and all, but to me this smells a bit like jealousy. And your aunt is wrong. Congrats on losing the 30 pounds and your healthy weight now! That is an accomplishment. Don't worry about people hating.
This. Although if you are lifting, maybe you should eat at maintenance not a deficit. The belly fat will go as your abs get stronger. Though, it could take a while. (I actually don't expect to lose all of mine, but I'm a mom of four. It doesn't bother me or my hubby and no one else's opinion counts.)0 -
They are not used to the new you. You are not to skinny. At 5' you can weigh 100 pounds and not be underweight. Maybe they are jealous of you. Keep up the good work you are doing.
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I'm the same height and weight that you are now. People have also made comments to me. If they persist, I tell them that my weight and health are between me an my doctor! If they still persist, then I tell them "thank-you for being concerned, but as I said there are people who monitor me (in addition to my doctor I'm talking about my husband and a trainer) and they all know how I'm doing." Then I tell them I'm not going to discuss it any more...and I change the subject! I guess you can say that I've asserted that I'm in control of what I put into my body and how I chose to exercise and stay healthy. I've gone through too much to let someone else's comments derail me. That may have happened in the past but not any more!!!
Best wishes to you! It can be hard especially at family gatherings if family favorite dishes are being served! Stay focused on a healthy course. You can do it! :happy:0 -
Despite the fact that I am in the best shape of my entire life, can leg press 450 pounds, do 100s of pushups and dozens of pullups... I am amazed at how almost all comments about my weight loss are negative toned. I have been told many times that I am "too skinny", "face looks anorexic", "wasting away", etc. You would think at least once in awhile someone would say "wow you look great!" or something. But I love this new strength, I am by no means underweight, and I eat plenty of protein and work out daily. I dont care what anyone says - this is my new way of life and I am not about to give it up just because some people are not sure how to deal with it, or are dealing with their own insecurities or whatever. I dont really care their motivation behind it, I just reassure them I am healthy (if I feel like being nice) and change the subject.
One of my newest favorite phrases that keeps me going - "a tiger doesnt lose sleep over the opinion of sheep". My opinion about my own body is all that should matter to me. The only person I would listen to otherwise would be my doctor, if she had any concerns I am sure she would tell me.0 -
When I used to get comments like that, I would tell them that actually I could lose another fifteen pounds and still be a healthy weight. That pretty much ended the conversations about my weight. Everyone is right, as they get used to you in your new size, the remarks will gradually go away. Most people are so focused on themselves that they will naturally forget the amazing change you have made.0
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Don't sweat it. You know what's right for you.
I had people tell me a few months in "don't lose any more weight". I was 155 lbs @ 5'2. I swear people secretly don't like to see other people succeed and try to disguise it as concern. I don't recall anyone saying "don't gain anymore weight" when I was pushing 170.0 -
F them!!! I agree, just jealous if you are on my fitness pal then it would seem that you are doing it the smart way - portion control!!
Just be careful not to be in deficit too much as you will slow your metabolism down and be counter productive. (I need to work on that too!)0 -
After I lost 30 lbs I was told to stop cause of that same voodoo bull crap...I lost 40 more and ditch that friend.0
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It's the change. You look different from what they expect you to look like.
Congratulations!
They really will get used to it. And it may be less awkward for them (not for you) to give you a backward compliment than a straightforward one. Some families are like that.0 -
Now the stomach remark was a little catty and I can see how that would come off as a jealous remark.
The other family members may be concerned. Certain cultures, certain people have an ideal of what's too skinny so I'm not going to sit here and say all your family is just jealous. That's sounds ridiculous. lol
They could be genuinely concerned. I know if my family members said that I wouldn't jump to a conclusion that they are jealous. Please, I'm loyal and love my family and do not think of them in that light.
Now, your aunt and the other family member who made that stomach remark.... that's another story. lol
I have been told by three different people I'm getting too skinny. One even went on my FB after I put on my status that I had a great workout.. "Poof!" lol.. He thinks if I lose anymore Ill disappear! LOL... Its funny to me. I don't take that as jealously. That's his opinion. lol
A few other people have expressed that I should stop losing weight or why am I trying to lose weight as I'm fine where I am at. I explained to them what my goals were and that's that. Whether they understood isn't my problem. I did my part by educating them on what I'm trying to do.
People are going to have their views of what they think is too skinny, too fat, thick, fit or whatever. But at the end of the day you got to just dock it off as ignorance because truly, more than likely, they do not get it.
Thicker skin is required and confidence. You got the confidence and happy with yourself just have thicker skin and keep it pushing. People are always going to have their own opinions on everything. That's life.0 -
Most people don't realize what a healthy weight looks like - we are so accustomed to seeing overweight, obese, and morbidly obese people walking around that we've forgotten what healthy looks like. Assuming you are eating healthfully and not over-restricting, it sounds like you are doing the right things. Your doctor will let you know if you are losing too much weight.
P.S. I don't see any reason why you can't get a flatter stomach if you are willing to eat and work for it!0 -
p.s. My wife is 5'3" and weighs 110 pounds. Poeple ask me if she is sick. I laugh and say no. Man, if only people ate and workout out like she does, they would look like her too.0
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Get used to it. all the fat people in my family think having ripped abs is unnatural and lifting weights is bad for you.0
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Keep body composition in mind too. I am 5 feet tall also. I am very curvey. My Doctor doesn't want to see me below 130. Someone once told me that I should way between 105 and 115. I would not feel or look good at those weights.0
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And this is why you can't do this for anybody else.
Too fat, too skinny, too fit, not fit enough, to bulky, too lean, blah, blah, blah.
Every person you know is walking around with a "vision" of you, their own perspective of how they see you. And since many human beings don't deal well with change, anything you do to alter their vision can cause disruption.
Bottom line, do you. Let the haters hate, you just sit back, laugh, and celebrate.0 -
Way to go! You should be very proud of yourself. Actually 115 pounds is not too skinny for someone who is only 5 pounds. Its just right. Family has a tendency to over react especially if they are not use to seeing you at your appropriate weight. As far as your stomach goes, you will need to do crunches. If your anything like me, I'm sorry to say you will have to do ALOT of them. I wish you the best and don't let others dictate how you should look. If you ask any dietician or look up a weight chart you are right on the money with your ideal weight. Sometimes it makes people look at themselves which causes them to feel guilty so they it is easier for them to say that your underweight instead of them being overweight. You go girl... 0
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You're not too thin, they're just jelly. I'm the same height and 112 lbs, and 100 is my goal (for right now).0
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