I miss my dad...Cancer Sucks

This time of year is hard for most people who are coping with a loss, whether it happened recently or a long time ago. I'm guessing that your dad passed that "compass" skill along to you, so he's still guiding you through life! If your grief continues, go talk to a counselor...please. Merry Christmas with hugs!

I also lost my dad...it has been almost 9 years since he passed away and I still think about him EVERDAY! He was also my rock and my number 1 supporter in all that I did. There were so many things that he "missed" after he passed, walking me down the aisle and the birth of his 2 beautiful granddaughters...but it wasn't until I hit rock bottom both emotionally and with my weight about a year ago and started running that I finally felt some peace. I was never extremely overweight but my dad was and he would always make "comments" which were not mean but also not the nicest-he didn't want me to follow his path and that was his tough love approach.

Running has become my release...it allows me to clear my mind and focus on nothing by my next step. My dad always encouraged me to become healthy and fit like I was in high school and often suggested running but I would just laugh (never a runner). I recently finished my first 10K and raced with my aunt (my dad's sister) and we were both bawling as we crossed the finish line because it was something my dad would have been SUPER proud of! So in a way I am kind of running for him and I have never been happier (it's a lot of time where I can talk to him alone).

I guess what I am trying to say in a roundabout way is it will get a little easier...but it's going to take time and don't force it! If you need to cry-cry, yell, scream...it's ok!!! My girls have never met their grandpa but you better believe that they know who he is because we choose to keep his memory alive!!! I hope you have a support system where you can talk about him and your feelings!

Sending you big (((((hugs))))) right now!!

I'm so sorry this is a difficult time for you. I lost my Grandpa to prostate cancer so I know that the long battle never really prepares you for their passing. My parents were in the army so my Grandpa was a parent to my brother and I while my parents where stationed in the field. He did the parent teacher conferences and violin recitals with the best of them! The holidays are hard when you are missing someone so hang in there, you will heal and feel somewhat normal again. The ache dulls, honest. Make sure you tell your kids lots of stories about him so they know who he was and keep living a life that would make him proud. When we see a nice watermelon or sweet potato from the farmer's market my son says "Great grandpa would have loved this one!" because he knows my Grandpa had a vegetable garden; even though he passed years before my son was born. Try to fit in more workouts, get more outside natural sun and fresh air and eat lots of fruits so depression doesn't set in. When I get down I will workout, even if I have already worked out on that day. It is such a lift. Keep some light versions of comfort food on hand if you need it. If you start craving meatloaf and lasagna it's better to have a Lean Cuisine or Healthy Choice than the real deal. A vitamin B6 supplement may also help. Keep talking about him and you will heal and laugh at old memories again. Promise.

My Mom died this past July of Multiple Myeloma. This past Friday would have been my parents 49th wedding anniversary. It is very painful and my heart goes out to you. Losing a parent is extremely profound and has a lasting impact. I miss my Mom dearly as you do your Dad. My brother said the other day that he wished grief went in a straight line. If it did, as time passed you'd go from feeling horrible to a bit better each day until enough time had passed. But it doesn't. It ebbs and flows like the tides. It hits us at times we don't expect. Take care of yourself. Surround yourself with loved ones and honor his memory every day. I keep telling myself that my Mom would want me to live a very rich life, and so that is my aim. Wishing you peace.
Risa

I know what you are going through. I love my Dad 10 years ago and he was my rock, my best friend, my counselor and my Daddy. Him and I were very close every since I can remember. When he was diagnosed with AML he was given 6 weeks, he lived 7 1/2 weeks. Christmas was always so special with my Dad and the fact that Dec. 26th was his birthday always makes it more difficult.

the first Christmas was the worst. I didn't think that I would ever be able to get through it. But, I did. We told stories of my Dad, my husband went to Christmas Eve services with me that year (well, then he was my boyfriend) as my Dad and I used to go together.

The most important thing to remember is that the memories of your Dad will allow him to live on in your heart and through you. When you remember your dad, when you laugh, when you smile.... that is honoring your father's memory and YOU are his legacy that allows him to live on each day.

Thinking of you during this holiday season.

My father died this spring after a six year fight with multiple myeloma. For some reason, I'm missing him acutely right now. I miss him all of the time, but right now I just can't stop crying. He was my compass, the person I turned to with every success, every setback, and whose approval I sought even as an adult. He was my guiding force and I talked to him every single day. I miss him.

i can relate! my dad died in may after a 2-year battle with prostate cancer. i miss him so much! thanksgiving was hard, but okay. christmas, however, is killing me. i am sad all the time. everyone tells me the first year is the hardest.
dawn