How Many Struggle With Moderation?
Graelwyn75
Posts: 4,404 Member
I am curious as to how many of you, cannot have large quantities of certain foods in your home, lest you eat them all ?
Lately, I have been repeatedly challenging myself, in my attempts to be one of those people who can have large quantities of certain foods simply sitting in their home, and only have a portion a day...and failing...then feeling like a total, greedy failure.
I am fairly sure as a child, I had a more normal relationship to food, but since having anorexia when I was 18, I seem to be incapable of eating a piece of chocolate, or a cookie, or a piece of cake, without this compulsion to finish it all... certainly the enjoyable taste does not help.
I keep trying and trying, and then feel miserable, certain that 'normal people' can have all manner of food in their home, and just have a normal portion. I have never been overweight, but this does bother me, that I would be classed by some, as weak willed, and lacking in self control.
Maybe the fact I suffer depression and am in a poor living situation currently, means it is not a good time to challenge my willpower in this way? I used to not even buy this stuff. It did not interest me to buy it. I would simply eat it when I felt like it, in whatever portion I wished, then return to not having it around. But I wanted so badly to overcome my 'weakness' around certain foods.
But anyway, my main wish is to find out how common it is for people to have to limit the amount of less healthy food they have in their homes, lest they eat it all.
Lately, I have been repeatedly challenging myself, in my attempts to be one of those people who can have large quantities of certain foods simply sitting in their home, and only have a portion a day...and failing...then feeling like a total, greedy failure.
I am fairly sure as a child, I had a more normal relationship to food, but since having anorexia when I was 18, I seem to be incapable of eating a piece of chocolate, or a cookie, or a piece of cake, without this compulsion to finish it all... certainly the enjoyable taste does not help.
I keep trying and trying, and then feel miserable, certain that 'normal people' can have all manner of food in their home, and just have a normal portion. I have never been overweight, but this does bother me, that I would be classed by some, as weak willed, and lacking in self control.
Maybe the fact I suffer depression and am in a poor living situation currently, means it is not a good time to challenge my willpower in this way? I used to not even buy this stuff. It did not interest me to buy it. I would simply eat it when I felt like it, in whatever portion I wished, then return to not having it around. But I wanted so badly to overcome my 'weakness' around certain foods.
But anyway, my main wish is to find out how common it is for people to have to limit the amount of less healthy food they have in their homes, lest they eat it all.
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Replies
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I trained myself to just savour one bite of a thing at one point in my life. and think.. this one bite is as good as ten. what will ten bites get me that this one does not get me?
If I am really honestly hungry I can still over eat on something naughty. But generally I'm pretty good at keeping it to just an ounce or two of ice cream or just one ice cream bar a day or just one or two ganaches even if I have a box of them with this principle in the back of my mind. It was definitely a taught or learned behavior though that I remember being extremely strict about for a couple years. Just one bite. Maybe two. No more. that was it and just as good as many more.
it's a good mental exercise. you have to think it as you're savoring that bite. Is it really better to have a bunch of bites over this one bite? I have the flavor.. I"ll remember the mouth feel. you can't wolf it.
the other rule is never to touch sweets when you're honestly hungry. and ask yourself after each bite.. Why do I need another? Am I hungry? what will I get from that next bite that is really worth it that I didn't get from this bite?
and put it down if you don't have a good answer.0 -
I trained myself to just savour one bite of a thing at one point in my life. and think.. this one bite is as good as ten. what will ten bites get me that this one does not get me?
If I am really honestly hungry I can still over eat on something naughty. But generally I'm pretty good at keeping it to just an ounce or two of ice cream or just one ice cream bar a day or just one or two ganaches even if I have a box of them with this principle in the back of my mind. It was definitely a taught or learned behavior though that I remember being extremely strict about for a couple years. Just one bite. Maybe two. No more. that was it and just as good as many more.
it's a good mental exercise. you have to think it as you're savoring that bite. Is it really better to have a bunch of bites over this one bite? I have the flavor.. I"ll remember the mouth feel. you can't wolf it.
the other rule is never to touch sweets when you're honestly hungry. and ask yourself after each bite.. Why do I need another? Am I hungry? what will I get from that next bite that is really worth it that I didn't get from this bite?
and put it down if you don't have a good answer.
Thanks, some good ideas. I think being mindful is the key. I know full well that beyond a certain point, the food just starts to taste, well, unpleasant, but hindsight is not too useful. When eating is more emotionally based, it can take a long time to master the art of just having a small amount... you have to work, I guess, on finding other ways to deal with boredom, depression etc, before tackling trying to moderate treat foods. Truth is, I love healthy food anyway and can go months without any junk type food once I am on a roll. It is just, I want to know I CAN moderate that sort of food, put in that situation. I suppose that comes down to my perfectionistic tendencies.0 -
I struggle with moderation too. I've had to take a 12 step recovery program style of dealing with it. I've given up the fight and realize I am what I am and it is what it is. If I have it around, I'll eat it. If I have one, I'll probably have two. So, I don't put myself through the emotional pain by tempting myself. I figure it's best not to have those foods I know are triggers for me. Plain and simple. If I do have it, I try to buy single serving sizes. Like a single slice of cake or the smaller ice cream pints. Or, I eat what I want then dump the rest.0
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I had to learn quick how to deal with moderation. My husband eats constantly and is still fit/thin. So when he comes home he has dinner, a snack, and dessert, then most nights another snack, and that snack needs dessert (and I'm not kidding)
The only thing I can't keep in the house is peanut m&m's. Not sure why but they are my down fall. Everything else I can leave.0 -
I struggle with moderation too. I've had to take a 12 step recovery program style of dealing with it. I've given up the fight and realize I am what I am and it is what it is. If I have it around, I'll eat it. If I have one, I'll probably have two. So, I don't put myself through the emotional pain by tempting myself. I figure it's best not to have those foods I know are triggers for me. Plain and simple. If I do have it, I try to buy single serving sizes. Like a single slice of cake or the smaller ice cream pints. Or, I eat what I want then dump the rest.
Yes, what seemed to work best for me was just enjoying my meals out and treats when I go stay with my mother, have the occasional piece of cake or chocolate while out cycling, but otherwise simply avoid. I mean, if I enjoy my healthy foods anyway, I guess it does seem a bit pointless trying to bend myself into someone else's form by testing myself constantly with the foods I enjoy but cannot seem to moderate...namely anything with that combo of fat and sugar.0 -
I struggle with moderation when it comes to my favorite things. I love licorice jelly beans and a few other really sugary candies, like candy corn. I was at my grandma's a couple weeks ago and picked out all her licorice jelly beans, over a handful, ate them all, and not only is that like 300 empty calories- but licorice gives me a headache. Go figure.
But long story short- I don't buy my trigger foods. I can have other sweets in the house without macking on them constantly, but I never eat anything sweet when I'm hungry. I might have something sugary to wash down my dinner, but that's it. If you eat treats while your hungry, it might fill you up for a little bit, but then you get much hungrier not long after and sugar makes you crave more sugar!0 -
I try to always plate what I'm indulging in so when the portion I took is gone.. I have to be done. It seems to work for me.0
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When I changed the way I approached life, eating habits automatically changed. Food to me is a way to sustain life, to live longer and to just plain be enjoyable. The more fresh foods I put in to my body, the more energy I have to do the things I enjoy. That's all that matters. The plus side of that is that all kinds of "junk" food seem unappealing and I never crave sweets or greasy food anymore. The plus, plus side is that the food I've been eating is more nutritious per serving than convenience foods which makes me satiated.0
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I struggle with moderation when it comes to my favorite things. I love licorice jelly beans and a few other really sugary candies, like candy corn. I was at my grandma's a couple weeks ago and picked out all her licorice jelly beans, over a handful, ate them all, and not only is that like 300 empty calories- but licorice gives me a headache. Go figure.
But long story short- I don't buy my trigger foods. I can have other sweets in the house without macking on them constantly, but I never eat anything sweet when I'm hungry. I might have something sugary to wash down my dinner, but that's it. If you eat treats while your hungry, it might fill you up for a little bit, but then you get much hungrier not long after and sugar makes you crave more sugar!
I never eat sweet foods while hungry either. I also know all about how sugar can make you hungrier and crave more. That is my issue. I only need a little and the craving for more is instant.0 -
When I changed the way I approached life, eating habits automatically changed. Food to me is a way to sustain life, to live longer and to just plain be enjoyable. The more fresh foods I put in to my body, the more energy I have to do the things I enjoy. That's all that matters. The plus side of that is that all kinds of "junk" food seem unappealing and I never crave sweets or greasy food anymore. The plus, plus side is that the food I've been eating is more nutritious per serving than convenience foods which makes me satiated.
The majority of food I eat is healthy and nutrient dense. I am very well versed on eating well.
I also know that junk does not satiate me.
However, I would still like to be a person who can moderate it, if it is around her.0 -
I can't moderate at all! It's difficult as I still have to buy a certain amount of "junk" food as I have a teenage daughter. Every few months I will indulge myself and have a piece of chocolate, but I can't have cake in the house otherwise I will demolish the entire lot. I've been this way since I was a child so I know that it's something that will be with me for life.0
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I can't moderate at all! It's difficult as I still have to buy a certain amount of "junk" food as I have a teenage daughter. Every few months I will indulge myself and have a piece of chocolate, but I can't have cake in the house otherwise I will demolish the entire lot. I've been this way since I was a child so I know that it's something that will be with me for life.
Been an issue for me only since I returned to counting calories and weight tracking really. I always loved sweet things since a child but I did not binge. I am curious as to how many people even keep large amounts of less healthy foods in home anyway... I have simply assumed other normal weight people generally keep in stuff like cookies, chocolate and cake as part of their regular stock.0 -
The only way there ever is chocolate, cake, cookies, crisps, you name it, in my apartment without me eating it all the same day is when it actually is or when I am convinced it is my boyfriends' food, i.e. not mine. That's also I think the only way I can moderate myself at the moment, when I know it is his food I don't even ask for a bite but he usually shares some with me anyway. He's so much better at controlling portion sizes! So that's how it is for me.0
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I used to have a problem with moderation too (sometimes still do!) I find the best way is to use my scales, look at a 'normal' portion, what a 'normal' person would eat, check the calories and think I have just worked my socks off in the gym do I need a second, third portion etc. I have this problem with Doritos and now buy the small singular packs rather than a whole share bag, once my smaller pack is gone, it's gone and that's the end.
I find that not being distracted by TV helps me savour what I am eating, I have also slowed down when eating to taste every bite. Once I finish I wait a whole 20 mins to check I am full rather than reaching for more food, I have a glass of water and if still hungry will have some more. I found digital kitchen scales have really helped with the portion control and also try where possible not to cook too much food for minimal left overs.
Good luck with ur plight!0 -
Since I've changed my eating habits, I no longer purchase any snack foods other than the ones that go in my stepsons lunch. But before that, if I bought a packet of biscuits, I would eat the whole packet.
I don't really know when my standard portion size when from 'handful of snack food' to 'entire packet of snack food' but I think it ties in with the significant lowering of price of family sized packets. In my local shop, a normal sized packet of Walkers Thai Sweet Chilli crisps is 79p, werea a family sized packet is only 21p extra. So, does it make sense to buy the smaller packet at those prices, but it also doesn't make sense to eat the whole family sized bag either but that is what I ended up doing.
Right now, there are tubs of chocolate and snacks building up in the cupboard because my girlfriend likes buying me little treats, but in the cupboard is where they will stay unfortunately - at least until I get to my goal and learn how to maintain it.0 -
For me it seems, the more I try to moderate anything, the more I end up wanting it. I approach it from a more physical approach. The human stomach is 1000 - 1500 ml in size. So my goal is to fill it up with the right amount of calories and mixture of foods, eventually letting my stomach signal my brain that I'm full. Basically i have 3, 4 cup meals at 1/3 my daily calories through out the day and it works for me.
I do notice on the days that I stress out mentally at work, my hunger becomes pretty aggressive. And I tend to use food as a way to cope or comfort from the day.0 -
The human stomach is 1000 - 1500 ml in size.
It's actually more like 2000-4000 ml in capacity. But your stomach doesn't need to be at capacity in order to feel full or even satiated.0 -
Always have.
Of course if I'm on a circa-1000 calorie deficit, it's going to be worse.
Ideal if I was living a few hundred years in the past, or in a part of the world where food isn't easy to come by.
Not such a useful 'survival trait' living in the the UK!0 -
All the time, diets aren't easy but worth it when you De in those skinny jeans with room to spare.0
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Depends what for me. Pre-packaged cookies or chocolate I seem to be doing fine with, which is an improvement I'll add, it's the homemade stuff I have a hard time staying away from. So I'm taking an extended break from making those. I think part of it for me is thinking it's going to go bad, or someone will finish it, so it's harder to tell myself that I can just have more tomorrow (the packaged stuff I know I can just go to the store to get more of if I want, while the homemade stuff would require making a whole new batch, so I don't want to do that).0
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All the time, diets aren't easy but worth it when you De in those skinny jeans with room to spare.
There are more reasons than wishing to fit skinny jeans, to wish to learn to moderate intake of certain foods.
Since I have never been overweight or had issues fitting skinny jeans(not that such clothes interest me anyway), this is more about finding how others have grabbed back their control, or if others have simply had to accept they cannot have certain foods around their homes.0 -
Yes, what seemed to work best for me was just enjoying my meals out and treats when I go stay with my mother, have the occasional piece of cake or chocolate while out cycling, but otherwise simply avoid. I mean, if I enjoy my healthy foods anyway, I guess it does seem a bit pointless trying to bend myself into someone else's form by testing myself constantly with the foods I enjoy but cannot seem to moderate...namely anything with that combo of fat and sugar.
This is exactly how I feel. I can stress about beating the combination of my biology + perfectly designed foods and constantly challenge myself and often lose ... or I can have it sometimes and be happy with what I'm eating and stick to my calorie deficit. I'm a bit obsessive in general so certain foods I will want to eat regardless of how long I've been eating them. Then I don't get enough protein or variety. This isn't restricted to just typical junk food. Gluten free English muffins from the Ezekiel brand? I could live off of those. So usually I don't keep them around. I tried the MFP moderation approach by buying them regularly and nothing changed except that it was harder to stick to my plan.
Why keep ice cream around if I don't miss it most of the time? If I really want it, I can go out and get some. But if 90% of the time, I'm happy with a protein green smoothie, why not go for what will best help me meet my health goals and keep stocked up on those ingredients? It's really awesome that some beat the moderation game and can keep the food around. But this isn't a competition. I don't need to try to be a better person through playing a game I don't even care about winning. My health is my goal.
*I also think it depends on your living situation. My spouse keeps foods around that I know I would want to eat if I could. I can't, so it's not an issue. But if I could, I may have to work harder at the moderation.0 -
I have found since restarting in January, I can keep little chocolate pieces from my fancy chocolatier in my snack basket and just have one or two a night. When my fiance brings out plain chips, I can eat a small handful and be done with it.
The chocolate came from Valentine's day sales, and next week I will be due to replenish the stock with reduced fancy Easter eggs (yum).
I learned last week that I cannot have flavoured chips or cherry blasters in the house or I will get a major sweet tooth. I guess these are trigger foods that can't be around for long.
Each person will have different triggers.0 -
There are certain foods like a massive pizza that I can control, and there are others like a tub of Ben & Jerrys and cookies that I cannot. I have accepted this. I have a principle of eating junk food only when it is REALLY worth the taste and this helps. I do not buy cookies or ice cream (my two "trigger foods") very often but, when I do, I allow myself that treat. This keeps me satisfied and helps me control my portions at other times.
Don't torture yourself by trying to test your will power, you will learn what works best for you soon.0 -
I struggle mightily, glad to know it's not just me. Certain foods I always overeat, so I can't keep them in my home and if I have to have them, I plan my day around it and account for the FACT that I will eat a lot. Pizza is the hardest one for me. I can't give it up completely and I can't moderate. I will eat all the pizza that is available to eat. So I either don't have any in my home or I get a pizza and eat it for lunch and dinner and the next days breakfast. But what I can't do is try to have "just a slice". It's all or none.
Edit: it looks terrible in my diary when I have a pizza day, even though I'm well under my calorie limit. It just looks bad not to be more moderate0 -
Mod-er-ra-tion..???..?? What is this you speak of? Tell me more about this! :laugh: Really even after realizing i've lost weight when eatting food I love like tonights dinner ( SOFT TACOS AND RICE) I cant stop. I end up feeling like crap. I still sometimes eat more than my husband or the same amount. I'm really trying to teach myself that just because i'm not stuffed dose not mean i'm still hungry! I hate food so much sometimes but then I find something tasty and fall back in love. UGH!! If only I would eat brockly like I eat junk food!0
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I have a hard time not eating a whole box of cookies or the whole cake/pie/whatever sweet thing is in my house. It's better for it to not find it's way into my house or only have the portion size so I know for sure that's all I have and nothing more. Sometimes if I'm craving chocolate, I'll just buy one candy bar and not whole bag of candy. That way I can have a serving and not over do it.0
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My application of moderation is shockingly dire. If I cut something I tend to replace it with another thing. Some days I can have a total handle on my self control. Others I'll just either have to throw out whatever it is or eat it all till it's gone. Hopefully it's a crappy habit I'll eventually kick for good.0
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I will admit there are certain trigger foods I do not keep in the house. Ice cream, cake, cookies, and pizza. I am the type of person that can sit down and eat a whole large delivery pizza plus breadsticks and pasta then dessert by myself if I wanted. One major thing that helped me with portion control is my scale. I now weigh everything I put into my mouth. That way I can put everything on my plate and know that this is all I can have and then I'm done with said meal. It takes the guesswork out of measuring like "is this a cup or 3/4 cup?" Everything is weighed in grams and meat in oz. If I do want cake or something special I make room in my calories and weigh it out. But I don't do it that often because I've had success keeping away from those things. But if I am in absolute need I will not deprive myself. I will eat it and be happy but I just make room for it and stay within my allotted calories.0
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It is a relief to know others struggle with the same issue, and also have to deal with it by simply keeping certain things out of the home.
I felt I was somehow, well, cheating in not learning and teaching myself to deal with the issue by challenging it.0
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