I NEED to get this off my chest!

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jenn559896
jenn559896 Posts: 42 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hi. So, today I went to the movie theater and I ordered one of those HUGE buckets of popcorn. Bad idea for an obese girl, I literally ate half of the bucket . :( I've always failed at losing weight, I keep failing. I signed up with myfitnesspal about 3 years ago and i weigh the same, of course I never kept up with it. Which is all my fault. But I'm sick of feeling so fat and pathetic. It's 1:30 in the morning and I can't sleep (probably because of all that f***en popcorn I ate) so I was lying in bed thinking about all the things that SUCK in my life because of my weight. Here's a short list:
1. I've missed opportunities to further my career/job because I have no confidence
2. I NEVER date. Never. I'm too self conscious, if I don't like myself, who would anyways?
3. I never take pictures. I stay out of them. I don't think I've taken a pic in 2 years, unless family forced me for a birthday or something
4. I've lost friends because of my weight
5. I hate socializing because i'm fat
6. I can't buy cute clothes, nothing ever fits right
Anywayssss, I could go on and on but I should stop. I feel so pathetic and so sick, I needed to tell the world. So i'm off to bed, gonna try to catch some sleep while I still can, darn it's almost 2 am and I have to wake up early.
Tomorrow is a new day, and I promise myself I will make changes, I have to or else I'll feel miserable for the rest of my life.
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Replies

  • Orion782
    Orion782 Posts: 391
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    You said it best: Tomorrow is a new day.

    You must take action, and it must be sustainable action. Always be better today than the person you were yesterday.
  • redpandora56
    redpandora56 Posts: 289 Member
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    Good for you for taking a stand. It's all about being accountable to yourself - you have to make your own choices. Trust me I know how hard it is - I've had a rough couple of weeks and have had some big meals that took me outside of my calories. But, I chose to do that, no one else. So I have to own up, accept it happened, and not let it get me down as I have a goal to achieve and its baby steps.

    So last night you said tomorrow is a new day - today is now that 'tomorrow' you mentioned. So make the right choices. and each time you do, be proud. remember that feeling of achievement the next time you're tempted to make the wrong choice. Find ways to reward yourself as you meet goals that don't involve food - buy a new outfit, piece of jewelry, get a manicure - whatever it might be. Or find ways to reward yourself with some of those things you mentioned below - reward yourself by organising a catch up with a friend - go out to see a movie WITHOUT the popcorn :)

    You'll get there, one choice at a time. Don't feel pathetic - acknowledge what's happened and use it to motivate you to move forward. Good luck :flowerforyou:
  • KMclymont
    KMclymont Posts: 19
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    It's already a new day...........you can start over again I am struggling with this too your not alone, I won't give up though, just start all :smile: over.
  • aarondnguyen
    aarondnguyen Posts: 270 Member
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    It's never too late to start again.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1216925-confessions-of-a-former-yo-yo-dieter

    ^ I hope that helps.
  • Poods71
    Poods71 Posts: 502 Member
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    You're feeling really down just now so the only way is up. Make a decision that today is going to be the day when everything changes. Don't start any silly crash diets as they only end in disaster. Make small changes to your diet, make your portions a little smaller, if you like you treats like chocolate etc. swap for something lower calorie or some fruit. But don't deny yourself completely. We are not meant to live without chocolate :laugh:. If there are times you take the car or public transport try walking and there are also good You Tube exercise videos. I like the low impact ones and the strength as my joints bother me, but you can find what suits you. But most important of all, don't lose motivation and keep going. Even if you have a bad day or even a bad week, it's not ruined you just go back to doing what you were doing it will only be ruined if you give up completely. Good luck :flowerforyou:
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
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    Here for you if you need to talk or a friend. I haven't been where you have but that doesn't mean I don't understand at all.
  • TheBoldCat
    TheBoldCat Posts: 159 Member
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    Knowing this and admitting it, is the first (and very important step)...now start solving one issue after another. Real friends do not care about your weight. They stand by you at any situation. Once you have this support, you can move to another point.

    START NOW....

    You are Strong, Loveable and Amazing person

    You can do it and you will achieve what you want

    YOUR LIFE = YOUR CHOICE

    xxx
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    the problem you have is that you dont feel like you deserve to lose weight... so you always self sabotage, am i right?

    You need to work on loving yourself REGARDLESS of your weight, and then you can work on making yourself healtheir and fitter (which will lead to weight loss) BECAUSE you love yourself and you, like anyone, deserves a happy healthy life...

    being thin wont automatically make you happy... that comes from within.
  • SophieLPxx
    SophieLPxx Posts: 12 Member
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    A year from now you will wish you started today! Just think of how you want to be in a years time and let nothing stand in your way or achieving it!
    Push yourself, Noone else is going to
    Good Luck!
  • jennibee70
    jennibee70 Posts: 1,067 Member
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    Those are all good reasons to motivate yourself to change, but instead of beating yourself up, choose just one thing to do differently today that you can feel proud of. Replace one fatty snack with a piece of fruit, or go for a 20 minute walk, just one healthy change for the better, and then go to bed tonight feeling pleased with that. And then repeat that one healthy change every day. Baby-steps!
  • TashTag
    TashTag Posts: 109
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    You said it best: Tomorrow is a new day.

    You must take action, and it must be sustainable action. Always be better today than the person you were yesterday.

    This

    I feel you sister. If I could offer one small piece of advice it would be to take everything one day and one step at a time.
    Oh and also live consciously. Make concious smart decisions before you do or eat anything. Think about what goes in your mouth and into your body.

    I stopped smoking 63 days ago, phew, and every day since then I have taken one small step to bettering myself. Little changes to many but a big deal to me. Cutting out soft drinks for example.

    Also this is a great place to surround yourself with like-minded people who will understand and sympathise with you...

    Hugs
  • ros2will3run
    ros2will3run Posts: 104 Member
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    Hi,

    hope you are feeling happier after a sleep.. you sounded pretty miserable! Or maybe let that misery push you into action?
    Personally, i often think why are so many people afraid of a little plumpness? or made to feel ashamed as they are large or fatter?
    It's not a disease..can look kinda pretty somehow..but it's society's obsession, and if you can't beat them join them.
    I want to 'look' good in clothes, have a flat tummy, tighten up by body..whether it's me, or society pushing me, i'm not sure..
    But i want a boyfriend to admire my physical form, be crazy about me; not get looks and comments from people too, stop feeling embarressed. too. so ok, i'll join in the obsession, and conform to society's idea of goodlooks....but will never be tall, or have blue eyes..!! having said that, i hate my fat legs..and big arms...and would like to be slim..but the tummy is just a bit funny, really!!
    So i guess if you have to decide if you are serious about weight loss, and like i should, examine abit more why you want to lose weight, and don't dislike yourself, i mean, like youself, as others have said, on mfp, throughtout the whole journey..from the start..at whatever weight.
    I guess i want to be slim, fit, fighting fit..toned, lovely..but i do recognise that i'm also being kinda pushed there, too.Does this help in anyway..the ramblings...of a dieter who's finding it quite a challenge!!
    Final thought...all of us want to be accepted for who we are, and maybe it's maddening, to have to, to have to be slim..
    and not so accepted when fat..and what is fat..just splodgy stuff..nothing more frightening than that..apart from health issues if seriously overweight. I don't know.. I just know, time has come!! and now I want to be slim. full stop~!!
  • SueGeer
    SueGeer Posts: 1,169 Member
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    Your profile pic says "It's your difference, make it happen".....so MAKE it happen!

    1. Log ALL your food EVERY day
    2. Weigh everything....DON'T eyeball it
    3. Fill up on veggies
    4. Drink plenty of water
    5. Keep your diary open for others to see......a *high five* or even constructive criticism works better than going it alone
    6. Exercise.....even a gentle stroll is better than nothing
    7. Set mini goals......eg 5lb increments
    8. Reward yourself in a non-food way each time you reach a mini goal

    Remember.......it's YOUR difference, only YOU can make it happen!! Bet we'll be here for you, cheering you on and picking you up when you fall....

    Good luck!!! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • AikiGhost
    AikiGhost Posts: 1
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    I'm currently training to be a hypnopsycotherapist (basically evidence based hypnotherapy with a side order of CBT & Mindfulness) and one of the more interesting videos I've found over the last year or two when researching the subject of emotional & pscological causes of overeating and thought some of you might find this video interesting.

    Luck,

    Dale

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1PriaSWyUo
  • RunaBen
    RunaBen Posts: 1
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    I know what you're going through, I've been there so many times, but not now. Try to focus on the good things in your life. Sometimes hard, but each day, try to write down three good things in your life. Try to figure out why you feel you need comfort food. It's not just that being obese is making you miserable. Being miserable is making you obese. Try your best to love yourself and yes, to love your body. If you love your body, you don't feed it with junk food. You feed it with good nutrients and you don't overfeed it, because that would make your body miserable. Give your body exercise, even just a little helps. Walking to the end of your street and back is good to begin with if you haven't been exercising, and then gradually increase as you feel more fit. Get your heart rate up and feel a little out of breath. Not too much. I hope this helps some.

    Most important thing: Love yourself!! <3
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    the problem you have is that you dont feel like you deserve to lose weight... so you always self sabotage, am i right?

    You need to work on loving yourself REGARDLESS of your weight, and then you can work on making yourself healtheir and fitter (which will lead to weight loss) BECAUSE you love yourself and you, like anyone, deserves a happy healthy life...

    being thin wont automatically make you happy... that comes from within.

    ^^^^ this

    and address your lack of confidence. It's likely it doesn't come because of your weight, and you won't suddenly become a confident person just because you're thin. It''s easy when obese to view ourselves thinner as a kind of idealised version of yourself, i.e. who you want to be. But all you change with weight loss is your size. If you're not applying for jobs/promotions etc because of a lack of confidence, I don't think this would really stem solely from you being obese. plenty of obese people have fulfilling careers and are good at what they do....

    learn to love yourself for who you are, to accept yourself, then it becomes much easier to reverse the obesity, because you're doing it because you *deserve* good health. you become more confident because you start to believe in yourself (and this happens before you get lean) and you start to go for the job opportunities because you believe in yourself and know you can do those jobs, and you know you can handle it if you *don't* get the job and you know you can try again next time and that's okay. If you need counselling/therapy to get to the root of the lack of confidence and self belief and learn to love yourself then do it. That self love is the momentum that keeps you going. It's not about willpower, it's about realising that YOU deserve better and going out and getting it.
  • brendanandnicky
    brendanandnicky Posts: 1
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    Hi,

    I'm new here, only started on Monday. Committed yo you dieter up til now and have decided that instead of "dieting" I need to get healthy...hopefully weight loss will be a side effect!!

    I just wanted to say how fabulous all your comments are...no judgement in sight, just support.

    Think i'm gonna like it here :)

    Nicky
  • SarahNicoleW94
    SarahNicoleW94 Posts: 62
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    You can so do this if you put your mind to it. we're all in the same boat, all want to be healthier and motivated. good luck :)
    xx
  • mfp2014mfp
    mfp2014mfp Posts: 689 Member
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    You can do it, you are worth the effort it takes to make the changes you need :flowerforyou:
  • lizzyclatworthy
    lizzyclatworthy Posts: 296 Member
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    I have been in that place, not for a long time but I was there.
    One thing I will say is don't pin everything on the weight. I lost loads of weight and was still miserable as sin. I had just lost my scape goat. I thought that losing weight would fix all my problems, I was wrong!
    Work on loving yourself and you can treat yourself better.
    I always try to treat myself the way I would want a guy to treat me

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