My bf says I'm going to the gym too much

I get out of work at 11am and I go to the gym Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. I don't go on Tuesday or on the weekend (Planet Fitness is normally overpacked on those days and I like going right after work since it doesn't have too many people).

I start by doing Zombies Training Couch25k Monday, Wednesday and Friday (I'm on week 2 so it's 10min walk, followed by 1min walk, 30 second run, 5 heel lifts, then repeat a few times for about 30 minutes) and then after that's over, I walk maybe 5.0 incline for 2.8 to make it 45-60 minutes. Then I do the 30-minute full body circuit (I'm not sure how y'all feel about Planet Fitness but the circuit is good for me since I am very very very insecure about going to the front of the gym right now). As of April 11th, I've been there a month going at least 3 days a week.

But I started going 4 days a week because normally Thursday's are very stressful at work and it helps me to just walk after work for 30-45 minutes to detox the stressful thoughts.. listening to music/watching CinammonToastKen on youtube/reading a few chapters into a book on Kindle/watching an episode of something on Netflix.. I typically don't do strength training since I do that after the C25k on M, W, F.

But my boyfriend says that is too much and that I won't get much results from going 4 times a week. Is what he says true? I feel so good going to the gym, even if it's just walking on the treadmill. I haven't lost ANY weight at all but I'd like to think it's because of the weight training so I'm not worried about that anymore.. it's just really relaxing now. Helps me sort through my thoughts and I feel safer there than if I were walking on my streets (I have a mild case of agoraphobia)

What are YOUR opinions? I don't really want to stop going 4 days a week but if there's a chance that I might not reap benefits, then I'd cut down the time spent working out and just maybe do some light Dance Dance Revolution at home (PS2 Style) or Just Dance to get my heart pumping a tiny bit :)
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Replies

  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
    So he says you're going too much BUT you won't get results from going only 4 days a week?

    Keep doing your thing, there's nothing wrong with going 4 days a week!
  • Eric_DeCastro
    Eric_DeCastro Posts: 767 Member
    you need a new boyfriend.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    I go to the gym 4x a week and walk/hike outside 2x for a total of 6 workouts a week, 1 rest day. Works great, my fitness levels have increased and I'm happy.

    You keep doing you.
  • DaddieCat
    DaddieCat Posts: 3,643 Member
    Do you eat enough? Do you have rest days, or even active rest days? Do you feel negatively impacted by your workout routine? If you answer no to these questions, you're fine. I work out 5-6 days a week, always heavy(for me), always hard. I eat plenty and I rest well... I see consistent strength gains and increased lean body mass with decrease in body fat percentages.

    Everyone is different, but if you feel fine and are eating, resting and getting enough liquids... you probably are.
  • easjer
    easjer Posts: 219 Member
    You are getting results. You are feeling great, finding a healthy way to 'de-stress' and doing good things for your body.

    It sounds like your bf's issues have more to do with insecurity than anything. What is the real issue there? That he wants to see you more? That he is worried about what you are doing? That you're doing something without him? That you've found something else that makes you happy? That you'll want him to join you? That you'll meet someone else?

    Cause it sure as hell isn't that you won't see results going 4x per week.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
    you need a new boyfriend.

    Does he even lift?
  • LokiOfAsgard
    LokiOfAsgard Posts: 378 Member
    I workout almost everyday. I think you BF is just concerned because if you don't give your muscles a rest they won't improve. He probably would work everything in one day, a couple times a week.
    As long as you're not hurting and are seeing improvement, you're good :)
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    On a good week I go to PF 5 days, and do something at home on Saturday. Even if I don't go to the gym, I still work out at home, either way. Tell him you want peer reviewed studies showing that going to the gym 4 times a week is bad. :wink: You should measure yourself, too. Don't just go by the scale, because your muscles are going to hold onto water to repair themselves. If it's something you enjoy, and it's not causing you harm, why should you stop?
  • corgarian
    corgarian Posts: 366 Member
    You do need proper recovery time for your muscles to repair themselves, but 4 days a week isnt too much. Sounds just right to me.
  • Biggirllittledreams
    Biggirllittledreams Posts: 306 Member
    That's actually a rather ideal workout regimen, and kudos to you for keeping it up thus far! :)

    You may want to thank your boyfriend for his concern, but merely tell him that what you're doing is healthy, and as of right now nothing to worry about. If he cares for you, then he'll realize that your health is not only your personal business, but also a top priority for you. Happy working out! :D
  • xProfLupin
    xProfLupin Posts: 35 Member
    You all are amazing. I eat my (fitbit) calories back which usually are over 2000 calories on my workout days and I try to aim for exactly 2k on my not-as-active days. So, I definitely eat my calories.

    On my rest days, I don't do much but sit on my computer to play Minecraft alllll day long xD (Side note, I do that after I get home from working out as well... I can't get enough of my blocky blocks).. sometimes I'll play DDR or go shopping to get some slow exercise just to get out of the house.

    These replies have successfully made me feel better about my ultimate decision in doing what I'm doing. I think I'm smart enough to know if I've hurt something by going so much and take time to heal if I'm really hurting (I typically don't like being hurt so I try to be smart in what I'm doing lol)

    So, thanks so much :3

    I knew that some people do up to
  • bshot1
    bshot1 Posts: 44
    I started with volume, did this a few times a week then ramped it up. Made me feel weaker, started actually tracking weight/reps and saw I was going down after each workout.

    I found the sweet spot eventually, for me to make any improvement I had to wait 4 days. If I waited 3, my numbers would pretty much be identical. Conversely, if I waited 5 days I'd actually improve more. Still, I felt like 4 days was the perfect timing.

    Keep in mind, this strength training I'm talking about. Low volume, heavy weight for 5-10 reps is what I do now. When I say four days, I mean that as per muscle group. If I had a chest/should and arm/leg day, it would be M/F T/S.

    My suggestion is to keep accurate notes on weight/rep/sets and see if you are improving. As much as lifting feels like you're accomplishing something, it's a negative stimuli. Muscles don't grow in the gym, they tear and swell. All growth occurs outside the gym, from eating right and getting enough sleep.

    Cardio is another story.
  • fredman2
    fredman2 Posts: 57
    If 4 days is too much then a LOT of people are going too much.
    4 days is not too much.
    Going to the gym relaxes you and makes you happy.

    Tell him he is not going enough...
  • FindingAmy77
    FindingAmy77 Posts: 1,268 Member
    girl keep doing you. my husband says this too. Not only is my workout/ walking time good for my weight loss and health, it is my time to recharge and think and feel good about myself. He will just have to deal. Now I have found that working in times to go when its not interfering into your couples time does help. For example: my husband works day shift so I try to get my workouts done before he gets home, with the exception of my light after dinner walk. I invite him everytime but he only joins me once a week. ugg. oh well I still go. But on the weekend: I have to get up early so I can be done before he wants to do stuff. Working out is for your health. You have to do it. Let him complain.
  • _KitKat_
    _KitKat_ Posts: 1,066 Member
    You are getting results. You are feeling great, finding a healthy way to 'de-stress' and doing good things for your body.

    It sounds like your bf's issues have more to do with insecurity than anything. What is the real issue there? That he wants to see you more? That he is worried about what you are doing? That you're doing something without him? That you've found something else that makes you happy? That you'll want him to join you? That you'll meet someone else?

    Cause it sure as hell isn't that you won't see results going 4x per week.

    ^This

    Sometimes our significant others can get a little jealous when something new takes our attention away from them some. It isn't right but everyone does it sometimes and may not even realize. Ever get a little irritated when a boyfriend gets a new hobby that does not involve you, you may know it is irrational but some people react without thinking.
  • RHachicho
    RHachicho Posts: 1,115 Member
    Every body is different. Some people can work out 7 days a week and blow it off. Some people will over train with just 3. If you are still feeling great after your workouts. Odds are you are doing yourself no real harm. And a lot of good. Learning your own bodies responses and being honest with it's limits and capacities is the key. As it is to everything else health wise really. No one cookie cutter approach works for everyone.

    Just watch out for if you feel like crap after workouts or if muscle ache starts persisting or becoming cumulative.
  • marcyj
    marcyj Posts: 31 Member
    Do you eat enough? Do you have rest days, or even active rest days? Do you feel negatively impacted by your workout routine? If you answer no to these questions, you're fine. I work out 5-6 days a week, always heavy(for me), always hard. I eat plenty and I rest well... I see consistent strength gains and increased lean body mass with decrease in body fat percentages.

    Everyone is different, but if you feel fine and are eating, resting and getting enough liquids... you probably are.

    That is the perfect answer!
  • Loralrose
    Loralrose Posts: 203
    If you were working out to the point of exhaustion every day, that would be too much. Anything less than that will be fine. The human body is designed to be active every single day. Do you think a thousand years ago people only worked out 3 days a week?
  • brianlowell
    brianlowell Posts: 28 Member
    That's more than fine, does he even go to the gym...?

    Just make sure you're eating right, getting plenty of rest, and feeling good after each workout. :)
  • RunMyOregonBunsOff
    RunMyOregonBunsOff Posts: 862 Member
    So you have 3 full workout days and 1 active rest day and 3 rest days. You aren't going too much. Actually, the recommended amount of exercise for adults is (according to the CDC) AT LEAST 250 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise a week PLUS 2 days of full body muscle strengthening activities OR 115 minutes of vigorous aerobic exercise a week AND 2 days muscle strengthening exercises.
  • Karabobarra
    Karabobarra Posts: 782 Member
    Everyone is different and what works or doesn't work for your bf may not be the same for you. If YOU enjoy going 4 days a week and don't feel like it's too much then go 4 days a week. Personally I think using gym time to destress is probably the healthiest approach to dealing with stress and give you kudos for it. Nice work! Keep it up.
  • KaelaLee88
    KaelaLee88 Posts: 229 Member
    I'm so glad that you are finding the exercise relaxing and easily accessible. Going to the gym 4 days a week won't do your body any harm, but it does sound as though your boyfriend might be feeling a little neglected.

    I may be totally wrong, but would you normally spend the time that you are now spending at the gym, with him? Do you workout together, at all?

    Possibly something to consider x
  • bciloveme2014
    bciloveme2014 Posts: 213 Member
    You are getting results. You are feeling great, finding a healthy way to 'de-stress' and doing good things for your body.

    It sounds like your bf's issues have more to do with insecurity than anything. What is the real issue there? That he wants to see you more? That he is worried about what you are doing? That you're doing something without him? That you've found something else that makes you happy? That you'll want him to join you? That you'll meet someone else?

    Cause it sure as hell isn't that you won't see results going 4x per week.


    She is right on the money.

    Had the same problem with my hubby at the beginning, but now he knows that I go to the gym to workout for one hour and a half and leave. He does not bother me no more
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,992 Member
    But my boyfriend says that is too much and that I won't get much results from going 4 times a week. Is what he says true? I feel so good going to the gym, even if it's just walking on the treadmill.
    That is the one of the BEST results someone can get.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • CJ_Holmes
    CJ_Holmes Posts: 759 Member
    Your boyfriend probably means "I want more time with you and I'm scared that you are going to love your gym and all of the buff guys there more than me." :laugh:

    Maybe you can swap out a walk for a hike with him, or find an activity to share?

    I've always been a solo exerciser, but lately I've been trying to integrate my friends and SO into some activities for time-management purposes. I'm also trying to influence them to be healthier, fitter friends and SO who can keep up with me!
  • LolBroScience
    LolBroScience Posts: 4,537 Member
    Try dating a man instead of boy
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    Is your boyfriend really fit? Ripped? Jacked? Able to run marathons? Cycles like Armstrong?

    If no, ignore his bs.
  • vs_shine
    vs_shine Posts: 1,314 Member
    I work out 6 days a week. not always at the gym though.

    he might just want to spend time with you and isn't verbalizing it in the right way.

    maybe go play tennis together. get your workout in, but be together.

    otherwise..... maybe he's just not being supportive.
  • Aaron_K123
    Aaron_K123 Posts: 7,122 Member
    Honestly the description of your routine doesn't sound like you are overtraining to me at all really. First overtraining is mostly an issue for weightlifting if you repeatedly hit the same muscle groups without allowing sufficient time for recovery. To me it sounds like your routine is pretty much cardio which doesn't have that issue. You can do cardio every day if you wanted, the only risk to doing "too much" cardio is if you are actually working out so much that you are netting less calories than you need to support your body. As long as you are eating back your exercise calories and fueling your body you can do as much cardio as you want really.

    Working out 4 days a week for like 45 min at a time is not "extreme" in the slightest imo. I feel like I am doing a pretty basic workout regimine because I'm pretty busy these days and I'm working out 6 days a week for 50 min at a time.
  • FancyPantsFran
    FancyPantsFran Posts: 3,687 Member
    If it helps you distress and feel good then its the right thing for you. Keep doing what you are doing. Results are coming.

    Listen to yourself and do whats right for you..!!!