No will power :(

That is why it is so hard to lose weight. As my psychologist friend told me years ago, weight loss is basically an exercise in pain tolerance. Most people can't endure it long term which is why 80%-97% of people who try to lose weight fail long term.

Once you are educated and of the mind to do it, losing weight isn't all that hard.

Seriously, it's not all about willpower. If your body is not properly nourished no amount of willpower will prevent it trying to get the nutrients it needs. For some of us, it's the FOOD. Changing what one eats can make all the difference for some people. (Note: I did not say "everyone".)

I can tell you my story: my only thoughts were to log everything I eat and work out hard. I wiped out of my brain that I want to get rid of my fat and I wasn't even think about that, no scale, no nothing. I weighed myself for the first time after 5 months, and I found out that I was 35 lbs thinner. Did the same for another few months, and lost a final 57 lbs. Just logging and working out as hard as I could. It wasn't hard at all. Just keeping an eye all the time at MFP, logging every single bite. It really was that simple. No will power needed.

I've been there. I've been told I had to lose weight due to health issues. I've been told I needed to lose weight cause people are worried about me. I've wanted to lose weight to keep a bf. I've been through so many of those types of issues. And I was an emotional eater myself. But this time something clicked. I'm tired of doing the same thing with the same results. Lose weight keep it off for a little then gain more back. This time I'm doing it because I want to do it. I want to be able to wear clothes and feel cute in them. I want to be healthier for me. I want to be able to run around with my step son and not get winded. I want to be able to children without it being a high risk pregnancy. I want to do it and make it a permanent change! It has taken 29 years to get this mindset. The only advice I can give you is for you to find the reason that YOU want to lose the weight. Not any other reason from any other person including doctors. I started slow. I started eating the same foods but smaller portions. Then a few weeks in I join this site (so you are already ahead of where I was). I tracked my food no matter what I ate. And every week I would look at what I ate each day and finally I started noticing things that I could take out of my diet that I wouldn't miss. I used to think I would miss bread. I switched to sandwich thins instead of regular bread then a few weeks later I stopped eating the sandwich thins. Now I only eat them once or twice a week. I used to love pasta. Still do. But I limited the amount I was eating and I noticed I started to feel better. So not I only have it once a week at most. And I don't eat a lot of it because I feel bloated afterwards. But I still want to be able to have it. I don't really crave sweets anymore, and since I rarely eat them I allow myself to indulge occasionally. Like when celebrating a birthday this weekend I ate a small slice of ice cream cake. Just enough to enjoy it without feeling guilty. And today I needed a pick me up so I got a frap from Starbucks. Both times the sweets fit into my calorie count for the day. I also track my food as I eat rather than plan and log the whole day. That way if I get to 4pm and I notice I only have 400 calories for the rest of the day, I go out and take a 30 minutes walk so that I can eat a normal dinner and not feel guilty.

Bottom line: you have to find what works for you. And that includes figuring out how to enjoy food without using it to smother emotions. If I have a moment where I feel the need to eat because of something stressful or emotional, I go grab watermelon. You can get really full off of it and the calorie count is really low. You are going to fall off the wagon a few times while trying to figure out the best method for you. Its ok. Just get back on and try a different approach.

Good luck!

I've been in a very similar boat, so I feel ya!

My best piece of advice, that I've really taken to heart this time around... ENJOY your journey. Don't limit yourself or say "NO" right away to "bad" foods. I found that in the past I was so quick to pass on everything I viewed as being "bad", and that wasn't me being very realistic.

You CAN have pizza, you CAN have a bowl of ice cream, you CAN meet up with friends for a drink/dinner/etc. Just track it and move on. Don't let it sabotage your day/week/mission. I've been really guilty of this. But now I have a salad with my one slice of pizza, I weigh out my ice cream (and buy the light stuff!!!), and I meet up with friends but make wiser choices for myself and what I'm trying to do.

You're worth it. Your happiness is worth it. And you CAN do it. We all stumble, fall a bit, but it's how you handle that fall that matters. Get back up, and keep on goin'!

Thanks for sharing, this was something I needed to read. Now just to put it to better action!

No we are overweight because we move drastically less in just 50 years (modern comfort), and apparently can't control ourselves in abundance of food.

Yes, reduced activity certainly plays a role also.

What about the people that never get fat, do they have the magic "fast metabolisms"? No they somehow know how to eat at maintenance. Are they the special snowflakes now? Doubt it.

However, most people in the United States are overweight. There may be a few "special snowflakes" with faster metabolisms, but most people don't, and that's why most people are overweight. Most people simply eat when they are hungry and stop when they are not hungry, and this can easily result in a calorie surplus. Even a small surplus over a few years can result in being overweight.

Your body is perfectly capable of "gauging", if you eat with common sense. If I eat "typical" food instead of fast food the sheer amount (volume) of food will be enough to not overeat.

Clearly we have different ideas of "typical" food . When I said "typical", I was including all the junk food that the typical American eats, including fast food. This is the way I typically eat when I am not counting calories. For example, your typical meal at Burger King, a Whopper with no cheese, a medium fry, and a medium Coke will net you 1350 calories. If you add a small milk shake for dessert that is another 580 calories, for a total of 1930 calories for a single meal. For many people this would consume their entire daily allotment of calories or a very large percentage of it. Yet this would just be a single meal out of probably 3 meals in the day.

what? I'm pretty sure the "fat people have low metabolism" myth has been debunked a long time ago. If it was true people counting calories wouldn't be losing like they are.

I suggest you watch the video I linked to before:

http://videocast.nih.gov/summary.asp?live=2993&bhcp=20

I did not say "fat people have low metabolism". What the research is showing is that when you lose body fat, your leptin levels decline. When leptin declines, it kicks off a bunch of other hormonal changes that trigger your body's fat store defense mechanisms. One of these is to reduce your metabolism. Another is to increase your sensation of hunger. And this affect persists for years in patients who kept the weight off for that long. A person who was obese and lost weight ends up with a metabolism that is 12%-20% less than a person of the same body mass who was never obese. That means that even when you hit your goal weight you will have to eat 12%-20% less food just to maintain.

It isn't hard though. I've been eating under maintenance for 9 months now and haven't been hungry at the end of any day. If you restrict yourself from food groups or certain macro's are evil, then yeah it might be hard. If you only eat cake and icecream it will be pretty hard too, cuz it's not very filling. Personal choice.

It's a personal choice that 80%-97% of the people who try to make fail to make. So it must be harder than you think. Some doctors are now saying that behavior modification for weight loss is not effective. Again, suggest you watch the video.

To me, having MFP friends who are watching is what motivates me. So get active friends lined up to support you!