Moderating cheat days

Hi all,

I know this is a somewhat controversial topic, and I'd love to get everyone's thoughts on it. I'm trying to follow a 'moderation is key to all' diet, but my boyfriend -- whose goals are sleep-health-related, rather than purely fitness/thinness-related -- follows a much stricter plan, which includes an eat-all-the-****-you-can day off to help curb cravings during the rest of the week. It's been working really well for him, and we've been using the day off ('faturday') as an excuse to explore the city, and its culinary delights.

I want to continue supporting him as best I can, and I'm not being so strict with myself that the occasional burrito or biscuit is so terrible. But that works much better on a day-to-day basis -- craving salty deliciousness one meal? eat a greener, lighter next meal. have a bit extra cheese at lunch? skip the moderate amount I was going to have at dinner -- than on a 'MUST GET EVERYTHING IN AT ONCE' weekly basis. Especially since I just felt gross the next day, this week.

So, for those of you that have weekly 'cheat' days (including people on the 5-2 diet), how do you stop from going completely overboard? What guidelines do you follow on your cheat days, if any? What are your opinions on cheat days vs. cheat meals vs. overall moderation? I'd love to hear from you all! Thanks!!

(Oh, another mitigating factor -- he's over a foot taller than I am, and weighs about 30% more, so I have to be careful not to just match him bite-for-bite, or even bite-for-every-other-bite, anyway, or I will want to keel over and die at the end of every meal)
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Replies

  • thavoice
    thavoice Posts: 1,326 Member
    Hi all,

    I know this is a somewhat controversial topic, and I'd love to get everyone's thoughts on it. I'm trying to follow a 'moderation is key to all' diet, but my boyfriend -- whose goals are sleep-health-related, rather than purely fitness/thinness-related -- follows a much stricter plan, which includes an eat-all-the-****-you-can day off to help curb cravings during the rest of the week. It's been working really well for him, and we've been using the day off ('faturday') as an excuse to explore the city, and its culinary delights.

    I want to continue supporting him as best I can, and I'm not being so strict with myself that the occasional burrito or biscuit is so terrible. But that works much better on a day-to-day basis -- craving salty deliciousness one meal? eat a greener, lighter next meal. have a bit extra cheese at lunch? skip the moderate amount I was going to have at dinner -- than on a 'MUST GET EVERYTHING IN AT ONCE' weekly basis. Especially since I just felt gross the next day, this week.

    So, for those of you that have weekly 'cheat' days (including people on the 5-2 diet), how do you stop from going completely overboard? What guidelines do you follow on your cheat days, if any? What are your opinions on cheat days vs. cheat meals vs. overall moderation? I'd love to hear from you all! Thanks!!

    (Oh, another mitigating factor -- he's over a foot taller than I am, and weighs about 30% more, so I have to be careful not to just match him bite-for-bite, or even bite-for-every-other-bite, anyway, or I will want to keel over and die at the end of every meal)
    I have a cheat meal, and not a cheat day. I do ADF so I fast until I have that great cheat meal.

    Many times though the cheat meal only gets me to the maintain so even in the end it doesnt costing me much.
  • DrJenO
    DrJenO Posts: 404 Member
    For me, it's only cheating if I don't log it.

    I _routinely_ have days where I go over my daily calorie allotment, but I save up for them ahead of time by going under on other days or by not eating back my exercise calories. It's a _planned_ cheat.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    How about moderating your whole diet rather than worry about which day of the week you might be "cheating." This is your diet and your life.
  • Forty6and2
    Forty6and2 Posts: 2,492 Member
    On my "cheat" days, I just go to maintenance, if not just a little under. I typically don't go over my weekly calorie goal, so it's all good.
  • vismal
    vismal Posts: 2,463 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?
  • DaivaSimone
    DaivaSimone Posts: 657 Member
    I don't make cheat days, I make cheat meals. If I'm about to have a cheat dinner, I'll go with lighter and health-conscious breakfast and lunch, and if I'm going out for brunch, I eat healthy for the rest of the day. I am currently trying to not cheat at all, by working out a lot before any cheat meals, but in the future, they're will be meals that won't be loggeg at all. Those will be real cheat meals, but they don't happen very often. I probably won't log my wedding dinner or my 30th birthday party, but that's it. ;)

    I find it easier to plan the cheat meals (like, logging the food before putting anything in my mouth, so I can figure out how much calories I'll eat, and how much I can add to this amount if I feel like eating/drinking more). I achieve this by planning all the cooking (as I am the one who cooks in the house, I am also the one who will decide when I cheat and what I will eat during this time) or, if I am going out, by looking up restaurants menu online. I try as much as possible to avoid unplanned cheat meals (something that would happen a lot in the past: coming home exhausted after work, don't want to cook at all, going out somewhere near from home and eating anything I feel like, and then trying to fit this in my macros).

    It's also comforting, when you use the MFP app for smartphones, to check your nutritional bilan of the week and see how much calories under your goal you have in bank. It helps me to feel ok with the fact that I am "cheating" (ok, I'm eating 500 cals over my calorie goal but I managed to put a thousand in bank by routinely eat under it, so I'm still not really cheating).

    Also, it's not an obligation to follow your BF food plan. If cheat days don't work for you, he surely can eat a lot one day while you're still watching your cals.
  • AAX2
    AAX2 Posts: 20 Member
    I am more of a cheat meal person myself. Honestly, I rarely have those. If I know I am going to eat somewhere that doesn't have many healthy options I eat better the rest of the day. Like yesterday we went out for Mother's Day, I knew we would go out for lunch, so I had a breakfast bar for breakfast & veggies for dinner. I really didn't even go over my calories for the day, but technically that was cheating in my book.

    It's good to have someone watching what they eat, BUT you need to focus on you & your diet. Even if you were on the exact same plan. I've learned eating healthy is all about you & focusing on that! Good luck!
  • mymodernbabylon
    mymodernbabylon Posts: 1,038 Member
    My husband eats what he wants and he loves to go out to the pub for dinner. I do too. But what I do, that he doesn't have to is watch my portions. So I'll still eat the same sorts of foods, but I'll have half a meal or less, and drink half the beers or less. I'm not depriving myself or him of good meals, but I'm still slowly losing weight, which works for me!
  • Karissa_Clohan
    Karissa_Clohan Posts: 126 Member
    Once a week my husband and I order pizza, and I don't eat anything else but the pizza all day long... and it's totally worth it. I get to maintain my deficit and maintain my sanity.
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?

    This
  • Hannah_Hopes
    Hannah_Hopes Posts: 273 Member
    I have cheat meals where I may have takeaway so can only log it as an estimate but I try log in advance to stop myself going over macros and I fit snacks that I may crave around my meals in advance :smile:

    edit: oh and I don't have 'cheat days' I stick to cheat meals, to avoid overeating I just listen to cravings throughout the week and satisfy them as they come up do what works for you
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    OP, you might be far better off asking this in a Paleo group.

    The science behind the occasional cheats are about hormonal level resets, those terms and ideas aren't even remotely considered to exist in a low-calorie or a IIFYM crowd, which about %95 of MFP'ers follow.

    As you can see, they're saying all kinds of things that neither address or answer or begin to approach your question.

    They have good intentions, but you're asking the wrong crowd because %99 of them don't use those dietary theories or idea.

    :wink:
  • Fattackler2013
    Fattackler2013 Posts: 142 Member
    I just eat whatever I want, whenever I'm hungry, but in moderation and then I'll have a treat near the end of the week once it has been earned by working hard throughout the week. :D
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
    OP, you might be far better off asking this in a Paleo group.

    The science behind the occasional cheats are about hormonal level resets, those terms and ideas aren't even remotely considered to exist in a low-calorie or a IIFYM crowd, which about %95 of MFP'ers follow.

    As you can see, they're saying all kinds of things that neither address or answer or begin to approach your question.

    They have good intentions, but you're asking the wrong crowd because %99 of them don't use those dietary theories or idea.

    :wink:

    95% or 99%; can I take the 4% and go above the red line of doom? Seriously, I have no idea what a cheat day really is; but if you need one, then best of luck.
  • holly55555
    holly55555 Posts: 306 Member
    I have a once a week cheat meal BUT I count it in my calories.

    In example, I eat around 1600 per day. I work off a minimum of 500 cal 5x weekly. Instead of eating back all my exercise calories (I pretty much never do unless I'm hungry), I attribute some of them to my cheat meal. Also, some days I will eat below 1600 (if I eat a lot of protein, for example, I'm full on way less calories), and anything extra goes toward cheat meal.

    I still count every item in my cheat meal - which ends up anywhere from 800-1200 calories (usually), but because of my rest of the week, I still end up under my goal of 1600 cal/daily.

    Does this make sense? I also portion control my cheat meal. For example, if I eat a burger and fries, I eat half the burger and half the fries. If I'm still hungry after waiting a bit, I will eat the rest, but usually I'm fine doing that and it saves me the extra calories. :)

    The "cheat" part is that it's unhealthy and less about calorie indulgence. It works for me!
  • DaivaSimone
    DaivaSimone Posts: 657 Member
    OP, you might be far better off asking this in a Paleo group.

    The science behind the occasional cheats are about hormonal level resets, those terms and ideas aren't even remotely considered to exist in a low-calorie or a IIFYM crowd, which about %95 of MFP'ers follow.

    As you can see, they're saying all kinds of things that neither address or answer or begin to approach your question.

    They have good intentions, but you're asking the wrong crowd because %99 of them don't use those dietary theories or idea.

    :wink:

    OP is talking about eating burritos, biscuits and cheese. She isn't talking about taking a cheat day in a paleo perspective, she's talking about going over her calories allotment for one day.
  • 970Mikaela1
    970Mikaela1 Posts: 2,013 Member
    My cheat days happen on vacation.
  • JustSomeEm
    JustSomeEm Posts: 20,254 MFP Moderator
    For me, it's only cheating if I don't log it.

    I _routinely_ have days where I go over my daily calorie allotment, but I save up for them ahead of time by going under on other days or by not eating back my exercise calories. It's a _planned_ cheat.

    This.

    Honesty is key. Logging helps keep me honest with myself, so I always log EVERYTHING. Often I find myself NOT eating things because I don't want to see it in my food diary. :)
  • lori_oz
    lori_oz Posts: 13 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?

    "Like".

    It's not a test and you can't cheat. Track what you eat and plan around treats/spikes.
  • logg1e
    logg1e Posts: 1,208 Member
    Er, where's his support for you and your goals??

    I think you should ask him to support your healthy living and compromise on one extravagant meal a week, rather than a whole day. He can eat what he likes all day, but there's only an expectation that you will join him for the one meal.
  • feliscatus84
    feliscatus84 Posts: 80 Member
    I agree with the "cheat day is a bad idea" people. You're essentially killing all the the work you did that week by allowing yourself a free-for-all day. Because, let's be real, when you have a cheat day you want to live it up. You want the tasty restaurant fat bomb and huge *kitten* dessert with all the toppings. At least I do lol! I mean you have to kick your *kitten* at the gym to have days like that and I'm assuming most don't. I've changed my way of thinking on this entirely. What I do is if I really want that amazing high calorie meal I break it in half or three servings and I eat one portion for dinner and the other the next day. Half the time my fiance eats it the next day anyway because I don't want to get sucked back into that way of eating on a consistent basis. I've lost 30lbs since January keeping with this method. I usually only do this once every other week. And also, you know if I want to have a treat during the week I will have it. Like with ice cream I just weigh it out and make sure it fits in my daily allotment. I feel I am doing a great job of staying on track this way and I don't usually obsess over food. If I HAVE to have it I will eat it. But always weigh and fit it in your calories and macros for the day.
  • ChristineRoze
    ChristineRoze Posts: 212 Member
    On the weekend i eat bad things, but i like to keep it within maintenance so then i know i am not going to gain from it. I over ate a bit during one weekend, so i decided to work out until i brought those calories down to maintenance haha
  • traceywoody
    traceywoody Posts: 233 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?

    This

    Double this!
  • I just started, but I agree with the concept of fasting on a day I know I'm going to have something that contains a ton of calories. I would rather save my calories and use them all together that day.
  • ritteea
    ritteea Posts: 6
    Started less than 2 weeks ago...so even if sometimes i do go 'astray' during weekends especially, i track even the extra calories just to be fair to myself and the efforts im doing to try losing weight
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?

    Bah. I totally disagree with this. There are some things you just can't fit in your diary - like, that restaurant you go to once every 5 years that has delicious foods. It would be really sad to limit yourself just because 'the concept of cheating is stupid'.

    And I don't care what people say... some foods are just not worth keeping for later because they reheat horribly.

    For what it's worth though... I have one of those days every other month or less, when I'll eat 3000 calories. But yes it's slowed down my weight loss by quite a bit (although I don't care at this point, I'm fine with just maintaining).

    Bottom line... I think a cheat day (or even meal, because really, it translates to the same thing for me because one cheat meal puts me 1000 over) every week pretty much defeats the purpose, and you're better off eating what you like in moderation within your calories, but a once in a while pig out for Holidays and special events is totally fine IMO.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    The entire concept of "cheating" is stupid in my book. You can eat whatever foods you want, every day as long as they fit your calorie and macro nutrient goals. A cheat day isn't needed. If you crave ice cream eat it, count it, and move on. A cheat day, or even a cheat meal can ruin a full week of dieting. Lets say you maintain on 2000 calories a week. You eat 1500 calories so you lose 1 lb a week. You have one cheat day where you eat 3000 calories as a cheat day. Congrats, you just ate away 1/3 of your week's worth of dieting. Why not just eat foods you enjoy every day in moderation?

    Bah. I totally disagree with this. There are some things you just can't fit in your diary - like, that restaurant you go to once every 5 years that has delicious foods. It would be really sad to limit yourself just because 'the concept of cheating is stupid'.

    And I don't care what people say... some foods are just not worth keeping for later because they reheat horribly.

    For what it's worth though... I have one of those days every other month or less, when I'll eat 3000 calories. But yes it's slowed down my weight loss by quite a bit (although I don't care at this point, I'm fine with just maintaining).

    Bottom line... I think a cheat day (or even meal, because really, it translates to the same thing for me because one cheat meal puts me 1000 over) every week pretty much defeats the purpose, and you're better off eating what you like in moderation within your calories, but a once in a while pig out for Holidays and special events is totally fine IMO.

    Eating =/= cheating


    That's why the concept of it is stupid. Track what you eat. Do your best each day to hit your macros and calorie goals. If you have a maintenance day, or even the occasional above-maintenance day (like holiday feasts), just log it and move on. It isn't "cheating," it's just living life.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Don't you think that by labeling a day "faturday" you are starting off with a negative association right off the bat? I dunno, just strikes me as a bit odd...
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  • beachgod
    beachgod Posts: 567 Member
    Eating =/= cheating

    That's why the concept of it is stupid. Track what you eat. Do your best each day to hit your macros and calorie goals. If you have a maintenance day, or even the occasional above-maintenance day (like holiday feasts), just log it and move on. It isn't "cheating," it's just living life.

    +1. I did cheat meals when I first started MFP and even then I used so-called healthier, low fat alternatives to the meals. I didn't last very long, not just because of this, but since I've been using MFP again I still go to the same place once a week, get the meal I want the way I want it, log it and move on. I do manipulate the rest of my macros for that day but that is easy enough to do and I sure don't consider it cheating any more.