"You never ask me to join you when you go to the gym."

My most dreaded phrase. I really like the 'me' time of working out and zoning out into the music and monitoring my heart rate. I have said politely that I have enough difficulty motivating myself some days, I can't also worry about someone else's motivation. Especially when they may not really want to work for it, they are just jealous of my results... Way to pin it on someone else!

Do any of you have a 'most dreaded phrase' now? How do you respond?
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Replies

  • arabellaflagg
    arabellaflagg Posts: 28 Member
    That's so me!

    My exercise is also my 'me time'. I make playlists in advance, I do a little meditation at the end. If I'm going through a rough patch or have something stressful coming up like a job interview or hospital appointment then I love to pop a DVD in and sweat all that tension out.

    I once had a co worker suggest she join me and we could be exercise buddies. I swear every ounce of blood drained from my face with the fright. I made some excuse and then a avoided her for weeks. I may or may not have hid behind a pillar in the parking lot to dodge her once :-/

    I also had a job once where I was the only person under 30 and also the only person at a healthy weight. At lunch I would eat my homemade lunch while the others ordered in pizzas and went to DQ across the street. They noticed my eating habits and somehow concluded that I was a nutrition guru as I was asked by 3 different ladies in the 6 months I was there to come and speak to their son's football team about nutrition. Ummm. No. Lol! So that's my other dread. People asking for weight loss/food/fitness advice that I am in no way qualified to give. Still figuring it all out myself.
  • sugarlemonpie
    sugarlemonpie Posts: 311 Member
    Hahaha at hiding in the parking lot! I've almost been there! I'm okay going for a walk with someone to help them, but I will sneak in a morning workout on my own all the same. I just enjoy it and it's such a great stress reliever, as you've said. :)

    I haven't gotten too much of being asked me for advice, typically people just want to give me advice! Haha. But oh my gosh I can imagine how strange that would be! Luckily the people I work with either don't pay much attention or are trying to be healthy themselves.
  • leslisa
    leslisa Posts: 1,350 Member
    I tell the truth when folks say "Hey, let's run together." No way. I run my pace and I don't want to have to run yours. Plus I start to get all competitive weird and run faster and faster until I'm beating them and they're po'd. And I don't want to talk when I run. And I want to go wherever I want. Or stop for 20 seconds if there is something really cool to look at (baby sand hill cranes in the spring).

    I think me time is completely rational.
  • This thread made me LOL because. I was never ever the type to go to the gym, let alone be asked to be someone's gym buddy. But now, I can kinda see it.
    I admit i am happy when I go to classes at the gym and see a familiar face or two. Especially the rounder ones at the back of the class ... which is where i sweat!
  • uconnwinsnc
    uconnwinsnc Posts: 1,054 Member
    I can be incredibly competitive. Someone telling me to "relax" is BS. I am relaxed, I just want to beat you at everything in life. :mad:
  • beautifulwarrior18
    beautifulwarrior18 Posts: 914 Member
    I use it to my advantage. I'll say I'll meet you at the gym at noon. Then I can't skip because someone is counting on me being there. I do however do my own thing at the gym.
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I just tell people I don't have time to work someone's schedule into mine.

    In reality, every time I've rearranged my life to have a "workout buddy", they crap out after a month, and they start trying to take me down with them.

    "I don't feel like working out today. Why don't we go out to eat instead?"

    So no. Other people are on their own.
  • luzdelua
    luzdelua Posts: 88 Member
    I totally know what you mean now! At the beginning I always wanted someone to go with me because I was "scared" of going alone, especially to the classes! Now I don't really care. If someone wants to come with me I don't mind, but I also just do my own thing.
  • VodkaSalad37
    VodkaSalad37 Posts: 66 Member
    at work: "oooh is that a salad??? are you on a diet?? are you *trying* to lose weight??"

    I feel like I have to hide when I eat and avoid the lunchroom completely. People are so nosy!!! I like to keep my progress to myself, especially since I'm just getting started. I don't like discussing my every calorie with people I work with, because that is all most of them do when they have conversations...

    So yeah. now I dread eating at work.
  • shmerek
    shmerek Posts: 963 Member
    I can go either way. I am perfectly happy to lift by myself or with someone else. Having a built in spotter can come in handy.
  • chani8
    chani8 Posts: 946 Member
    "Can you eat this?"

    I can eat whatever I want!

    ...and no, I don't want to eat that!

    Leave me alone with my boring menu! It keeps me steady.
  • LiftAndBalance
    LiftAndBalance Posts: 960 Member
    I so understand you. I work out at home anyways and one reason is that it is 'me' time. I don't want to compare myself with others, which I'd inevitably do if I worked out with someone else, but just with me from last week/month/year.

    I don't understand how the same people who ask if I should it 'this' (i.e. ice cream, chocolate etc.) also keep offering me other food and especially alcohol when I've already said no thanks. I'd rather eat chocolate than drink alcohol. Many of my friends, however, seem to think chocolate is the arch enemy of losing weight whereas alcohol gets the 'come on, it's just a glass, that won't ruin your diet' comments.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    Yes it was on my FB yesterday after I logged my walk yesterday with mapmywalk app...

    It's my time with my husband....and I never know when I am going so why do I have to schedule around someone else...it's bad enough I have to wait for him to get home from work...
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Yeah I hate when people ask if they can come walk with me. They slow me down, and it defeats the purpose!
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    Training partners are a bad idea unless they're a lot better than you, in which case you'd better learn to keep your mouth shut, your ears open, and your schedule subordinate to theirs.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Going to the gym is not a date or a social function...it is work...I am getting work done. People are more than welcome to join me if they want, but it's not friggin' happy hour up in this *****...it's time to kick some *kitten* and take some names.

    I generally don't have people asking me why I never ask them to join me in the gym.
  • katro111
    katro111 Posts: 632 Member
    Dreaded phrases:
    "Wanna go to the gym tonight?" NOPE. I want to go alone. Hence why I'm getting a power rack, barbell and weight plates for home.

    "Here, you need more!" or "You should have this, too, so I don't feel bad about eating it." No thank you. If I want more, I will get it myself. Don't put more food on my plate or pour more wine in my glass.

    "Ohhh, I would offer you some of this, but you're on a diet." Actually, no, I'm not on a diet. If it fits my macros and I want it, I'll eat it. I also don't want to explain to you what macros are.

    "I shouldn't eat this, this, this, or this. It has fat in it." Again, not going to explain to you that eating fat doesn't make you fat and you do need to eat fat in order to maintain bodily functions, etc. I will just smile and nod.
  • katro111
    katro111 Posts: 632 Member
    Going to the gym is not a date or a social function...it is work...I am getting work done. People are more than welcome to join me if they want, but it's not friggin' happy hour up in this *****...it's time to kick some *kitten* and take some names.

    +1!
  • angf0679
    angf0679 Posts: 1,120 Member
    I workout alone. In my bedroom where my roommates can't see me.

    My roommate did go with me on my first run. (I'm using C25K to train for a 5K I'm doing in Sept). I told her she didn't have to keep pace with me, but she did and I am grateful for that.

    My roommates have commented a couple of times when seeing me weigh food that it wasn't enough. I told them it was for me.

    Last week I was eating my lunch at work when a client saw me (I was at the reception desk as my computer is out of commission right now) and they commented "So you are eating healthy now" Not sure what he meant by "now" as this was not a regular client and he more then likely had never see me eat at work before!
  • pvegeta
    pvegeta Posts: 4
    Someone recently did that to me, and I just put it bluntly: You would slow me down.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    Training partners are a bad idea unless they're a lot better than you, in which case you'd better learn to keep your mouth shut, your ears open, and your schedule subordinate to theirs.

    I agree with this statement.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    Meh, even when I did go to the gym a few times with a friend or my ex, we did our own thing anyway. But if you're there to drag me down, forget it.
  • rpmtnbkr
    rpmtnbkr Posts: 137 Member
    I too prefer the lone workout... About the only thing I do with someone would be a bike ride. We're all basically the same tempo, but none feels pressure to keep up or fall back... together but still in my own zone.
  • bcf7683
    bcf7683 Posts: 1,653 Member
    Going to the gym is not a date or a social function...it is work...I am getting work done. People are more than welcome to join me if they want, but it's not friggin' happy hour up in this *****...it's time to kick some *kitten* and take some names.

    I generally don't have people asking me why I never ask them to join me in the gym.

    :laugh: Same. I tried working out with one of my friends before... Switched my lifting time from before work to after (I hate the gym after work. Apparently it's social hour). She stood around and talked to everyone at the gym instead of doing sets. Drove me insane......so that's never going to happen again.

    I've been going to the same gym for 3 years before work and I don't know anyone's name that also goes every morning. I'm friendly enough to wave and smile when I walk past them, but other than that, I don't usually interact with the other animals.
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
    I can go either way. I am perfectly happy to lift by myself or with someone else. Having a built in spotter can come in handy.

    Yeah, about how I feel.
  • parigoris
    parigoris Posts: 3 Member
    I agree 110%! I made the mistake of hooking up with a friend once to start going to the gym together to motivate each other.. I quickly found out that the gym is my place to concentrate on me- no phone, no computer. She would leave the door to the sauna open, chat incessantly, etc.
  • eventerchick80
    eventerchick80 Posts: 98 Member
    I had someone ask me about working out but then I told them that I'm up at 5 and at the gym by 5:30 when they opened and got the "but that's so eeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrlllllly." Um, ok, guess I won't see you there. The schedule I keep alone seems to be the biggest deterrent.

    I like my early hours, my quiet time, and my equipments tucked away from the more frequented area so I don't have those huge fans blowing on me.
  • CharleePear
    CharleePear Posts: 1,948 Member
    I would love a training partner, and yes I do take it seriously. Having someone spot you (especially with squats I find) is valuable. Shame I don't have anyone and didn't have anyone help me on Monday when I dropped my barbell on my shoulder.
  • kcmcd
    kcmcd Posts: 239 Member
    I love being with people. It's why I'm such a *kitten* for all the group exercise classes. I'm the weird friendly girl grinning at all the strangers. I love it. And I love sitting in the lounge with people after a class with our faces all bright red and complaining about how hard it was. Shared experiences. My favorite.

    But I can't run with anyone. First, I feel like I'm slower than anyone I know - and having to go slower would make me mad, so I figure that's how they feel. Also running just makes me angry. I do not enjoy it. I guess I'd rather suffer alone, which is too bad - because I've actually had people say "hey we could run together" and noooobody wants to go to the gym. lol
  • Orion782
    Orion782 Posts: 391
    "You've really slimmed down...a LOT..." (In a disapproving tone.) - Yes, I've lost 25+ pounds since last summer. Yes, it's noticeable (that's kinda the point). Yes, I'm healthier, stronger, faster, and overall in better shape in every way that I was before I lost that weight. NO, I do not need to "put on more weight" just because you are fat/unhealthy/overweight.

    "You're sure eating healthy today, you're putting us all to shame!" - I heard this yesterday and have heard it often when having lunches with clients/vendors. Sure, sometimes I will go Kobayashi on pizza, a burger, or some other less-than-healthy food at lunch. But I have balance, which means I try to fit it into my calories/macros by eating some things that won't kill me before age 50, too. Oh, and this blackened salmon ceasar salad I'm eating? Yeah, it tastes just as good as your fried chicken sandwich, buddy.