Needing some advice

Stef-thanks for the article recommendations, I will check those out. Stress is a big one for me. As far as weighing my food, I weigh it all when I am at home. Yes, the peanut butter that night was an estimate as I was at my parents and in desperate need of a snack, so I estimated the amount. However, I always weigh my yogurt, protein powder, bread, etc. 1 serving of yogurt is 227g which equals 140 calories, and the protein powder is 25g for 85 calories. While the serving is recorded as 1 scoop or 1 cup the numbers match the nutritional information. I do weigh everything when I am at home but not when I've gone out to eat
It is disheartening to think I could be so far off track especially since I've been at this since 2009. I first lost 85 lbs, with Weight Watchers so I've been tracking for a long time. I did gain some back when I went into maintenance and failed to maintain, so I have been working on losing it for the last 500 days with MFP.
My thought is those times when I am eating out that I am way far off track and must be blowing my whole deficit. Yes, I had a few bad days in the more recent weeks, but before that I was pretty spot on for 4 months and still not consistently losing, maybe 5 lbs in that whole time. I am not arguing or disagreeing, like I said it is just discouraging to work so hard and see that I am so wrong.

Allen-Every since I started lifting weights I've not lost consistently. I really don't know what that magical number is. I try to cut and then I end up being exhausted with very little energy for anything and while I lose, again it is very slow. I try to eat more to have more energy to get my workouts done but nada on the losing. I've figured my numbers with online calculators probably 100 times but I don't seem to be able to eat what any of them say I should.

btente-Two cardio workouts a week is to much? They are normally between 30-60 minutes. I assume I am not supposed to spend all the rest of my nonworkout day sitting on my butt (although I do far to much) and if it is to much, shouldn't it be helping me to drop weight? When I say I am lifting as heavy as I can, you are right, it's not a 1 RM. I am lifting for the set amount of reps for my workout that allows me to complete those reps but not feeling like I could do any more than that. Example, yesterday I was doing a single arm bench press with a 32# dumbbell, 3 sets of 8 reps. On both set 2 & 3 I was failing at rep #7 on both arms. I couldn't have lifted it again without a rest time. I am increasing weight with every workout or if that isn't possible then I add reps.

So my question still remains about weight lifting and maintaining my current muscle while trying to primarily focus on losing the weight. Do I just need to cut down on my number of workouts per week, or do I need to decrease the intensity of the workouts so I can eat at a better deficit (while bringing the hammer down on my logging)?
It is crazy to me that I lost 85 lbs while only walking 3-5 hours per week but now that I weight lift, ride a bike and walk on hilly terrain and run/jog on a weekly basis I have such a hard time. Not to say my physique hasn't improved from all of that, it most definitely has.

btente-I'll admit you are talking just a bit over my head. This is what I can tell you, I am doing Gluteal Goddess by Bret Contrares. I did the entire beginner program and I am now on the advanced program. Some of the exercises in this first phase have higher reps, such as 3 sets 20 reps of hip thrust, or 3 sets of 20 reps of cable hip abductions. I am using as heavy of weight as I possibly can on those exercises (this week 90 lbs on the hip thrust and my glutes were burning-pitiful amount of weight but that's why I'm doing this program to make improvements), and while I would like to quit with everything that's in me, I am able to complete those reps. I don't know why the reps are so high for those exercises in this phase, but the next phase they drop down into that hypertrophy range. Some of the exercises I do fail on, but not all.
I am just trying to do better (more weight or reps) each time I do a workout, meaning I have three workouts I do a week, and the next week I want each of them to be better than the previous week.
Example of yesterday's workout: 3 sets 15 reps 90# hip thrust superset with 3 sets 8 reps of 64# one arm cable row, 3 sets of 6 reps of 40# goblet squats superset with 3 sets 8 reps 32# one arm bench press each side, 3 sets 20 reps of 64# cable pull through, 1 set 14 reps side lying hip raise each side, 1 set 5 rep of Turkish get up with 10# dumbbell each side, 1 set 12 rep 40# anti cable rotations on each side.
There are two other similar workouts for the week, one that I repeat at the end of the week, all primarily focusing on the glutes, hips and legs with abd and upper body work in each workout.
I thought deloading was what you did after 8-12 weeks on a program.
As far as cardio, it's not all high intensity, sometimes it is just that 3- 3.5 mph pace walking.
So now I think I've told you everything I can about my lifting and how I've been doing it. Still wondering how come I am not dropping body fat or weight if this is the right thing to be doing.