Weekend (or weeklong) trips with family potlucks

Thank you nxd10, Sal, and ritan7471! This all helps. That post, ritan7471, made me wryly smile in sympathy! I totally understand about the bread products and the family that likes you to eat! One family member used to make a tray of brownies every time I visited just because she knew I liked them so much. And yes, I would eat more than one - they are probably my favorite dessert. I get "in trouble" when I tell myself it is okay to have "just a little bit". A little bit tends to turn into a lot. Not always, though. I've had some successes in the past. At single meal events when I have "warned" the family ahead of time that I won't be eating much (so that I don't feel badly about not complimenting their cooking by having seconds, etc.) I have been able to have tiny pieces and not gain weight. But weekend or week-long events don't seem to work that way. Probably because for those single meal events I prepared all day ahead of time by having high quality protein, fiber, and vegetables.

I do count my blessings in that I am not gluten-free (my oldest daughter has a severe reaction). I bring food for my daughter to any family get-together.

Oh belanna5 - I do normally log my intake pretty accurately. I just didn't over the weekend even try. That may have been my problem. So I went from maintenance to 8.2 lbs over (but I know - and hope! - some of that is water weight)

I agree that protein is one of the keys. On Sunday I did request that I could make a protein shake (I had brought the protein powder), not only for me but for my children as breakfast was a (very yummy) white doughy bread with carmelized sugar and nuts on top. Why did I eat it? Well I almost didn't - I ate the protein first and was full - but then there was a tiny piece left and I knew from previous experience that the bread was very tasty. I figured I never eat like this at home, so it probably wouldn't hurt. And I started telling myself that the raised cortisol from feeling deprived of what other people were eating would maybe be worse for me than actually eating the sweet. Wow - it really does start in the mind, doesn't it?! So... if that was my only indulgence, I would probably have only gained water weight. I do tend to binge if I'm not calorie counting.

Ok - so my strategy for next weekend will be to log everything even if the estimate is off. And since I am over my maintenance weight now I can overestimate calories while keeping my intake under maintenance levels. Hitting maintenance calories right on is for me harder when you don't know the calories than just aiming to go under. I will also bring plenty of low-calorie protein snacks so I am not too hungry - but I do expect to be slightly hungry since my body somehow tells me I'm famished when I smell delicious "off-limits" treats. I won't try to worry about cortisol levels and stress of deprivation - as my cortisol levels from increased stress of weight gain are probably worse. I will skip the bread and pasta salad, if it is a separate item and not the main dish. I will bring sugar-free (xylitol sweetened) gum to keep my mouth busy. Thank you. I already have a reputation for being a "healthy eater" so maybe they won't be offended.... I won't even start to eat those sweets for which I don't know calories - not even a tiny bit. Healthy food really does taste good if that is all you eat! I know this from experience! This past weekend when I had my first apple crisp in what seems like forever, initially the sweet taste was too much. But I felt badly about not eating it since it was on my plate, so I kept eating.

In the meantime, increased aerobic exercise, water, and lower calories than maintenance to hopefully start to recover. I've seen the effects of not being careful about food intake both in myself and others, and it should be enough to stop me! But it isn't always.

Thank you everyone! If anyone has anything to add, I will be continuing to check this post. And I will report back after the weekend. This will help keep me accountable.

Thank you aalbert_82, wnging, and frannieshack! I really appreciate your encouragement and tips!

My mom called today and one of the nights apparently we are going out for pizza. I think I will need to bring my own food for that dinner. Pizza is too tempting to have just a little bit. She also was asking me about the brownies she is thinking of making and asking me what would taste best (my family likes my cooking and I started baking really young). I decided to tell her that I don't plan to eat any sweets - just so she wouldn't make the brownies for me. She is still going to make them for other people. She said they also plan to go out for ice cream. She asked me to make gluten-free cookies but I asked if she wouldn't mind if I just bought some, since when I make cookies I am more likely to eat them. They are making cinnamon chip French toast. Hmm - frannieshack you are right, I may need to bring my own simple food for several meals! My plan is to focus on the people, not on the food I am not eating. And drink water and chew gum! Hopefully then I can navigate all these temptations!

Thank you all for cheering me on! Wishing you all well, too, at your family get-togethers!

Thank you pjarellano, shrcpr, Sal, lafilledelaru, ajfuelling, Cycle4Life99, chrisdavey, and nxd10! And best wishes to you all and Joseph236, too! I really appreciate learning what has worked for you.

Yesterday I ordered a divided plate in an 8 1/2" size Cycle4Life 99 - I think that will be a great help! I didn't have time to write back until now, though. I did decide that except for sweets I should eat at least a little something of foods that people have made, so that they won't feel badly. As long as I can portion/calorie control, I shouldn't gain weight. My relationships have to ultimately take priority over my struggle to maintain weight. And I have an idea of what will be served so I have already looked on MyFitnessPal for dishes that sound similar. I think I may bring out my measuring cups and scale, since I am already kind of known as the health "nut" anyway. Since some of the meals that will be served won't have enough protein to make me feel full, I will bring protein (perhaps canned salmon, Greek yogurt, or protein powder) and chia seeds to supplement. Tiny amounts of carbs for me - you are right, Sal! My cravings shouldn't get out of control if I don't touch sweets. Those are really my downfall. I think I will eat a salad - perhaps with chicken - at the pizza place - thank you, nxd10! I checked out their menu today.

Bringing my own food last weekend didn't work since I had decided to eat dinner with everyone and my mother-in-law, who is a fantastic cook, provided several Thanksgiving-style feasts. I ended up eating too much, probably because I didn't log or measure. That is going to be the major difference this weekend. I will log and measure. I felt odd bringing out the scale (I did have it with me) last weekend, but this next weekend we will be with "my" side of the family, so I think I will feel more comfortable getting the scale out with them.

Chrisdavey - I'm not sure how to answer your question. Our family enjoys our conversations together - but everyone plans their meals so carefully that our get-togethers are a lot about the food, too. It seems to heighten the enjoyment of the conversations. I think sweets may contribute to that, especially chocolate or wheat-based desserts, with the release of serotonin. I'm a registered nurse, so forgive me if I'm breaking this down too much into chemicals! Analyzing this is hopefully helping to counter my reaching unthinkingly for a dessert! Something else I learned that may help someone - I read there is a hormone released in the afternoon and evening that encourages us to pack on calories, especially fat. Knowing that my afternoon drive to eat is hormone-based has helped me fight it by planning a protein snack in the mid-afternoon. That has worked really well for me.

Our family is planning activities, too - not just meals! The weekend should be really fun.

Thank you, so very much, everyone! I will report back next week! Bless you all!