Fatty haters

Hmmmm . I have found that Mom groups CAN be vicious and frightening judgmental places. Do not fret it's probably some other bizarre and unreasonable thing that is causing her to act this way. Best thing you can do is keep being nice to her; because soon some thoughtful kind Mom will notice and one of 2 things will happen 1) mean mommy will look like an idiot or 2) she will stop treating you that way because deep down she knows its not socially acceptable and others are starting to notice.

Why do you think it has to do with your weight? She could be having a hard time understanding your accent, she could be thinking you are boring, she might hate your clothes, she could be thinking you are a snob, she could be naturally shy and prefer talking to the people she already knows, you might have made a comment about a topic she is sensitive about and offended her, you might have said something that led her to believe you disagree on something very important to her, like parenting style, religion, politics.

Or she might not even dislike you at all. I am often accused of not liking people when that isn't the case since I tend to be reserved until I get to know someone well.

That being said there ARE some people who actually DO treat those who are heavy differently than those who are not. If she in fact IS that kind of person then I would NOT let her stop you from doing something you otherwise want to do and I would NOT worry about what she thinks of you since someone like that is NOT worthy of your time or your friendship regardless of your size.

Don't you worry about your weight, you can do your own thing and just let her be her. One day, she might come to you when she wants to come to you. Don't push it if she's not warming up on you. Weight - i think you're just being self-conscious, and thinking too much. Just stop, take a breathe, relax, do your own thing.

I know exactly what you mean. Where I live seems to have a disproportionate amount of skinny moms, some of whom really do look down their noses at others who don't fit in because they're not the "right" size, wear the "right" clothes, or some other spurious reason. I do know it's that, because as I've lost weight, more of them say hello to me, because I "fit in" now. It's all very juvenile. I tend to ignore people like that. There's plenty of people out there who are lovely, friendly, warm, welcoming people regardless of size/clothes/religion.

Maybe you could try balancing the "new moms" group with one that is of specific interest to you and nothing to do with babies/moms, like a book club? You'll probably find other moms there anyway, and might have more in common with them.

I was in a group for stay at home moms when my kids were little and I was one of two moms in the group that were substantially overweight. I had some of the moms treat me differently as a result and it really hurt my feelings at the time. I ended up befriending the other mom that was overweight and we became the best of friends and still are very close even 14 years later. I stayed in touch with some of the other moms, but not many of them. I recently was talking to one of the moms from that group and she said that when she first met me she was intimidated by me because I'm pretty smart and she felt dumb around me (apparently I use a lot of big words). Here all this time I though that it was my weight. You never know what insecurities other people have, so just go, be yourself, and make friends with the people that appreciate you for who you are!