distorted image?

I spent the first 15 years of my life being the "shortest" girl where ever we were. In grade school I was always in the front row, the first in the line, toward the front of the class - all because of my stature.

I started high school at 4' 11" and by the end of the freshman year I was 5' 7". I grew eight inches in one year.

By today's standards, I am taller than most women but in my mind I am still short. I try to inch my way to the front of any crowd, afraid I won't be able to see when actually, I can see just fine from the back. For years I always wore the highest heels I could stand, just to look taller.

So, yeah, I think our self-image is distorted.

If there's anything you should know it's that you are definitely not alone in feeling like this! When I tell people I have an issue with my current weight they look at me like I'm crazy. I think you need to listen to you and you alone because at the end of the day it's YOUR body and no one elses. I know that I felt my best when I was around 115 lbs and granted I am only a couple of pounds away from that, it still doesn't mean I shouldn't pay attention to my fitness and nutrition! I don't think my post is exactly related to what you were saying but I figured I'd comment : /

Definitely! I think sometimes it is worse than others...i read somewhere that if you stare at a part of your body it will seem bigger to you than if you just glanced at it which is a really weird thing to think about! I wear a UK size 6/8 which is slim however whenever i look in the mirror i still see the size 12/14 girl that i was when i was 15. Being a size 12/14 i wouldn't say is a bad thing but just over 5ft so the size really showed on me. As a result i can never tell what i really look like or trust my own view of myself and constantly over analyse and over judge meaning that i am too harsh on myself! Its a vicious cycle i'm afraid! So my advice would be don't always concentrate on what you look like, concentrate on how you feel! The ultimate goal in healthy living should really be happiness, because if we don't strive for that what really do we have to gain?? x

i completely understand...i've lost about 15 lbs in the last year and from what others say i look great, but i don't always see it on myself! i still see my flaws (thicker thighs, not quite toned yet arms and abs) more than my accomplishments (muscular thighs, progress on my arms, ab definition)...it is always easier to see progress on another person, because i think that if i were to see someone else with the exact same body as mine i would be envious...i wish i could objectively look at myself and see the progress i've made and how good i look now compared to before (though i wasn't entirely displeased with my body before to be honest)...its funny that when you aren't particularly heavy to begin with the more you lose the harder it is to see it and appreciate it on yourself (for me at least)...instead of seeing that i am a size 4 and thinner than i've been in my adult life, i see that others who are around the same height are starting at and aiming for 10 lbs less than my goal...i struggle with it every day...i know that i should be happy and proud and some days i am, but there are always going to be more difficult days...super frustrating...sometimes it is reassuring to know that there are others fighting the same battle, but it stinks that it is so hard for so many people also!
sorry for the rant, you just hit on a topic that i understand all too well!

I'd love to be able to see myself through my husband's eyes. I see big hips, he sees curves. I see small boobs, he sees cute perky boobs that stayed in the same place for the 11 years we've been together. :laugh:

I'm currently making an effort to go through my closet and purge everything that doesn't look great. For instance, I have a little velour hoodie that's a little too tight in the arms. I kept it thinking, "I'll lose weight." Screw that. I will lose weight, but I'll do it for me, not for a damn hoodie, and I'm NOT going to have that thing hanging out in my closet making me feel bad!

I think it's definitely a female thing.
The other day, I was looking at my senior photos from high school and wanted to cry. Not because I have since gained weight but because back then I had NO IDEA that I had a killer body.
I weighed between 125-130 lbs in high school, had an athletic shape, my boobs were a nice size, no hips, flat stomach...yet, the entire time I thought I was big/fat. Wth?

Definitely! I think sometimes it is worse than others...i read somewhere that if you stare at a part of your body it will seem bigger to you than if you just glanced at it which is a really weird thing to think about! I wear a UK size 6/8 which is slim however whenever i look in the mirror i still see the size 12/14 girl that i was when i was 15. Being a size 12/14 i wouldn't say is a bad thing but just over 5ft so the size really showed on me. As a result i can never tell what i really look like or trust my own view of myself and constantly over analyse and over judge meaning that i am too harsh on myself! Its a vicious cycle i'm afraid! So my advice would be don't always concentrate on what you look like, concentrate on how you feel! The ultimate goal in healthy living should really be happiness, because if we don't strive for that what really do we have to gain?? x

I am currently going through this myself. I think that in terms of proportions, I am the same but just a -40 lbs smaller one so this causes me to think that I am not skinnier even though everyone says that there has been a huge difference. I consistantly need to remind myself that I am a smaller size (going from a 14/16 to a 8/10) and trying on old clothes to see them hang off of me to give myself motivation.

I agree OP.

A lot of people are that way. At times people can be conceited and think they look good when they don't. And then there are other people who look great and feel like they look horrible. I usually jump from one side to the other. Some days I see something great in the mirror, other days I'm bummed.

Agree. Some days I feel too skinny, other days too fat. But to the outside world I look great! Eye of the beholder I guess.

Agree. Some days I feel too skinny, other days too fat. But to the outside world I look great! Eye of the beholder I guess.

I'm my biggest critic. I think it comes with being into bodybuilding or changing how you look.
Some days I feel like a million bucks and I feel ripped.
Then I can be around some bigger guys, or have a bad day diet wise, and i feel small and crappy.

Thats why I always get confused when I see people posting goal weights. I can't imagine ever being satisfied and saying alright I'll just maintain.

I have huge body image issues. When I look in the mirror I feel big, even though I know deep down that I am not. Even at my lowest weight I still wasn't happy with myself. I hear the same thing from so many females, the constant dissatisfaction and self-hate. I have a fear that I will reach my goal and still be as unhappy with myself as I am now, and I think that sometimes holds me back from really giving this my all. :ohwell:

Honestly I think it a learned thing and little things that are said in the past the hurt stay with us longer. At 210 I loved myself (as of new years) but when I was younger I didnt apperciate myself when I was 140, cuz I was the "fat " on of the group. Now my "lil" friends say how jealous of me back then when we went shopping because I knew what would fit me and just buy it at the store and it would look great while they had to try on every piece the store had. Because they lacked the confidence. I am now at 195 and I still love me for who I am chunck and rolls and curves and all. But I am on a mission to better myself build myself more confidence to be a better person.

You are your worse critic and until you get ahold of that nay sayer you may never be happy so Change it dont let that NAG get the best of you because you are a beautiful person inside and out.

Well, I have the opposite problem: I look in the mirror and see an 21 your old man who looks pretty good! (I am in my 50's and still overweight) When I see a picture of myself it becomes more real.

We just need to realize that our senses are filtered through our personalities, beliefs and experiences to create our perceptions. I remember a psychology class demonstration of a dance floor where the class was given an assignment to watch a film clip and count the dancers for a brief time. People were coming on and off the dance floor and it was kind of hectic to count. More than 1/2 the class did not see the gorilla character cross the dance floor bright as day!

Yes, I think most women do have a distorted body image......For me, growing up in a household of six sisters who were all TINY like my Mom was tough! I was the "big" one at 5' 7" (one of my sisters is just 4' 11" and my Mom is 5' 0"). As a teen, I was a runner and had a tall, thin runner's body.....yet, my family always teased me that I was the "big" one!

So, as an adult, I can see that I am not fat....but, I just see fat on me. I see myself as the big one, and that makes me feel "fat."

I think that we can redefine our own perceptions of ourselves though! I'm working on that everyday!

I was always the biggest girl in my class as a child. Not heavy, just very tall (5'9" by age 12). But I always remember looking at the legs of the girls sitting next to me and then at my legs and seeing that my legs were so much bigger. It took me a long time to realize that my legs are always going to look bigger (no matter how thin I am) because I am a bigger person. If my legs were a thin as a girl who is 5'3" at my height, I would look like a stork. Now I try to focus more on the proportion of my body and that has helped.